Need encouragement: feeling I've done all the 'right' things and getting nowhere

[holyrood]

How to keep a long story short? I’m not perfect. I know my faults. But I have tried *very hard *to live my life right in God’s eyes: prayer, following the unpopular teachings, daily Rosary with kids, fasting weekly, prayingg for those who have hurt me, Perpetual Adoration, confession, recognizing and thanking God daily for the blessings in my life.

And yet… I still struggle with so many things. I find it incredibly difficult to sit still and keep my mind on the Rosary. I read and hear how people love saying it and find so much peace and joy in it. After twenty years of trying, it is as much a struggle as the day I started. My mind wanders and jumps, and sometimes I realize hours later I wandered right away from it and never got back. I often dread even trying to say it, for this reason. I find it almost impossible to meditate on the life of Jesus while saying it, and even when I’m thinking about the specific mystery, have this empty feeling of, “I know all about this, but what am I supposed to be getting out of it?”

I keep feeling that if I’d taught my children the faith well, and lived it myself, there’d be less fighting and fewer tantrums. (I do see progress, but it seems so slow.)

I wonder if I’m wrong in refusing to “be the peacemaker” in several situations (husband, in-laws, sister), but then, it looks to me as if continueing as we were is really only bearing the burden of abuse, keeping things peaceful for them, but not actually making real peace. I do not lash out at them, but I don’t reach out to them, either.

I am struggling with depression. I suppose this is what upsets me the most. I feel that if I’m doing all the right things, I ought to have some interior peace and even joy. I understand that life will always hand us plenty of problems, but I thought if I was living my faith, I’d have some peace in the midst of that, and maybe some wisdom about how to respond. I don’t. I heard a convert to the Catholic faith on the radio yesterday talking about how joy-filled her life has been since becoming Catholic.

Is there something else I should be doing to find this great peace and joy?

 

[brigid12]

How to keep a long story short? I’m not perfect. I know my faults.



And yet… I still struggle with so many things. I find it incredibly difficult to sit still and keep my mind on the Rosary. I read and hear how people love saying it and find so much peace and joy in it. After twenty years of trying, it is as much a struggle as the day I started. My mind wanders and jumps, and sometimes I realize hours later I wandered right away from it and never got back. I often dread even trying to say it, for this reason.

Me, too. I know I was even brought into His Church after 5 years of saying it. But …

I keep feeling that if I’d taught my children the faith well, and lived it myself, there’d be less fighting and fewer tantrums. (I do see progress, but it seems so slow.)

His time, remember?

I am struggling with depression. I suppose this is what upsets me the most. I feel that if I’m doing all the right things, I ought to have some interior peace and even joy. I understand that life will always hand us plenty of problems, but I thought if I was living my faith, I’d have some peace in the midst of that, and maybe some wisdom about how to respond. I don’t. I heard a convert to the Catholic faith on the radio yesterday talking about how joy-filled her life has been since becoming Catholic.
Is there something else I should be doing to find this great peace and joy?

I’ve been feeling the same way, however I recently heard Mother Angelica quote what an old woman she knew said,“If the Lord sends you tribulation, He expects you to tribulate”. That quote allows me to be easier on myself, at least.

 

[beckycmarie]

Dear Holyrood,

Perhaps you are being called to contemplative prayer. Here are the signs of the beginnings of infused prayer:

A person can recognize the beginnings of infused prayer when three signs are found together (one or another by itself is not enough - it could be due to something on a merely natural plane):

1. One experiences a disinclination to meditate discursively, an inability to profit from active reflecting. This disinclination and inability are not due to laxity, but rather to being drawn toward God in a simple, idealess way. Even though distractions may abound, the Lord is infusing a dark longing for himself. This yearning is usually dry, delicate, and brief.

1. An inner perception of emptiness replaces the ideas and pleasures of former discursive thinking. The person is giving up worldly pleasures and is not yet purified sufficiently to enjoy God with any depth. Hence, there is a lack of comfort and closeness. The Lord seems distant and finite things do not satisfy.

1. There is a marked earnestness in serving God better. This sign shows that the first two do no proceed from mediocrity, but from a new and better form of prayer.

Source: Seeking Spiritual Direction: How to Grow the Divine Life Within by Fr. Thomas Dubay, S.M. p. 185

 

[AveSantaMaria]

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

Devoting this post to the Sacred Heart of Jesus through the Immaculate Heart of Mary

Remember, O Most gracious Virgin Mary that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help or sought thy intercession was left unaided. Inspired with this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of virgins, my mother. To thee do I come, before thee I kneel, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word incarnate, despise not my petitions but in thy mercy hear and answer them. Amen.

**I, very recently, in fact only a few hours ago received an experience of supernatural passionate intamcy with Christ through Mary. It is WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL:thumbsup: **

Christ through Mary DID in fact come to bring joy and we ourselves will know whether we have experienced that joy or not.
From His Holiness Pope John Paul II: “Christ came to bring joy; joy to children, joy to parents, joy to families and friends, joy to the sick and elderly, joy to all humanity. In a true sense Joy is the keynote message of Christianity, and the recurring motif of the Gosepls. Go therefore and become messengers of joy.” From the Gospel of John, “Ask and you will receive so that your joy may be complete.” (John 16:24),** and “I have revealed these things to you to that my joy in you and your joy may be complete”** (John 15:11) ** The Sacred Heart of Jesus said in the Beatitudes, which mean happy or blessed,
“The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor,
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind,
to release the oppressed,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” (Luke 4:18-19)

From the Cathechism of the Catholic Church 1718 The Beatitudes respond to the natural desire for happiness. The desire is of divine origin: God has placed it in the human heart in order to draw man to the One who alone can fulfill it:

We all want to live happily; in the whole human race there is no one who does not assent to this propostition, even before it is fully articulated.

How is it, then, that I seek you, Lord? Since in seeking you, my God, I seek a happy life, let me seek you so that my soul may live, for my body draws life from my soul and my soul draws life from you.

God alone satisifes

Only some time ago I was also trying to find the joy in my Catholic life and wondering where it was in the midst of the Cross, jealous of such saints like St. Therese of Liseux and St. Maximilian Maria.

One miracle of St. Therese of Liseux’s life was that, when dying of a horrible painful death of tuberculosis, she is reported to have said: *“I have reached the point of not being able to suffer any more, because all suffering is sweet to me.” *

Polish Saint Maximilian Maria studied philosophy, theology, mathematics, and physics as a college student, before earning a doctorate in philosophy and a doctorate in theology in Rome, while suffering from tuberculosis. He became a priest, changed his name to Maria from Kolbe to venerate the Immaculate Heart of Mary, sheltered 2,000 Jews in his friary during the Holocaust, and when taken to the Auschwitz concentration camp offered to die in place of another man since that man had family and he did not as an abstinent fiar. During his time in the cell,* he led the men in songs and prayer and thoughts of Jesus and Mary*. Finally, after three weeks of dehydration and starvation, he was injected with carbolic acid and died. He is reported on the Jewish Virtual Library as Righteous Among the Nations. It shows that no matter how dire the situation God can continue to strengthen us. jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/biography/Kolbe.html.He founded Slaves of the Immaculata, www.consecration.com.

What is exceptional about both of these saints? Profound Marian Devotion

​

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

 

[AveSantaMaria]

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

Found on Slaves of Jesus through Mary facebook: excerpt from a letter from Therese to Mother Saint-Placide, written in Carmel in December of 1888:

“I received the dear circular letter of the Children of Mary with pleasure. Certainly, I won’t fail to be present in spirit at this beautiful celebration, for was it not in this beautiful chapel that the Blessed Virgin Mary adopted me on the beautiful day of my First Communion and on the day of my reception into the Children of Mary. I could not forget, dear Mistress, how kind you were to me at the time of these great events in my life, and I cannot doubt that the remarkable grace of my religious vocation germinated on that blessed day when, surrounded by my good teachers, I made the consecration of myself to Mary at the foot of the altar, taking her for my Mother in a special way, when in the morning I had received Jesus for the first time. I like to believe that she did not look then on my unworthiness and that, in her great kindness, she considered the virtue of the dear teachers who had, with so much care, prepared my heart to receive her divine Son. I like to think that it was for this reason she wanted to make me become more perfectly her child by giving me the great grace of leading me into Carmel.”

~Letters of St. Therese of Liseux Volume I.

*Carmel is a religious community under the protection of Elijah and Our Lady of Mount Carmel. *

From my personal experience, I came to know Jesus by surrendering to him 100% passionately. Maybe it is true that joy in Christ through Mary comes from the Cross, because it is through the Cross that we have the chance to prove our love to him. For if there are two people, and one is willing to suffer a cross, getting nothing back, for the sake of another person and the other is not - the one who suffers the cross loves more. Thus, as we grow in and prove our love to Christ through Mary by accepting his PASSION, he proves his love to us by giving us spiritual union and divine delectable intimacy HOTNESS So maybe the cross is sweet as it allows us to prove our love to Christ through Mary

Maybe that’s why St. Therese of Liseux said, *
“Far more by suffering and by persecution than by eloquent discourse does Jesus wish to build up His Kingdom.”*

Much of my attraction to True Devotion to Mary consists in the fact that the Immaculate Heart of Mary gives you crosses, which are the gifts of heaven, but she is the “sweetness” of the Cross.

(excerpt from section 154) But I maintain too that these servants of Mary bear their crosses with greater ease and gain more merit and glory. What could check another’s progress a thousand times over, or possibly bring about his downfall, does not balk them at all, but even helps them on their way. For this good Mother, filled with the grace and unction of the Holy Spirit, dips all the crosses she prepares for them in the honey of her maternal sweetness and the unction of pure love. They then readily swallow them as they would sugared almonds, though the crosses may be very bitter… It is obvious that a person could not keep on eating without great effort unripe fruit which has not been sweetened."

True Devotion to the Blessed Virgin
montfort.org.uk/Writings/TrueDev.html
**Secret of the Rosary ** montfort.org.uk/Writings/Rosary.html
Preparation for 33 day consecration to the Blessed Virgin
saintlouisdemontfort.com/consecration.cfm
Devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus
en.wikisource.org/wiki/Devotion_to_the_Sacred_Heart_of_Jesus#FIRST_POINT._.E2.80.94_The_ardent_desire_Jesus_Christ_feels_to_be_with_us.

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

 

[MaryLou_Dempler]

Dearest Holyrood,
I think you are doing a GREAT job. You are practicing your faith. Did you ever wonder how bad it would be for you if you weren’t doing all of this? The rosary is the GREATEST Prayer for me. I have read svereal books on the Rosary, different thoughts for all the mysteries, etc. Two things are best for me. One is when I have a difficult time trying to concentrate, at the begining of each Hail Mary I repeat the mystery I am meditating on. Two, I read a bible verse about the mystery so I have a story in my mind of the mystery. I also let the Holy Spirit lift me above my intented thoughts and meditiations. I let the Holy Spirit show me the sotry played out like a movie. I allow the Holy Spirit to show me what I can learn from it. I have lots more suggestions. Maybe only say the Joyful Mysteries every day or just 3 times a week to focus and celebrate advent until Little Christmas on January 6, 2009. If you want to email me musiclou42@msn.com
I pray this helps helps you. Remember you are not alone with your problems or struggles.
God Bless You,
MaryLou

 

[AveSantaMaria]

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

Online Adoration of the Sacred Heart of Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament
louisville-catholic.net/WebCameras/AdorationChapel/tabid/825/Default.aspx

Divine intimacy is something that cannot be planned or controlled, only accepted

To receive it, maybe one must remember the first two commandments in which Jesus through Mary sum all of the law and the prophets. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind and Love your neighbor as yourself.

That’s not a minimal commitment, that’s a MAXIMAL commitment. Maybe others are different, but I really needed 100% surrender over a long period of time to receive it, and I did though I didn’t know what I was looking for when I started out but I LIKE it

It took about 5 years from the time that I first started following God passionately and giving up things, accepting crosses, for him that I received it. Only 2-3 weeks since I became an ardent follower of True Devotion to Mary though For the majority of my walk with Christ through Mary, I wasn’t intimately devoted to the Immaculate Heart of Mary.

Romans 1:1, “From Paul, a bond SLAVE of JESUS CHRIST.” Are you a slave of Christ through Mary? Can you drink his Cup to share his glory and his passionate love and ectasy? Can you love God through Mary with ALL your heart, soul, and mind?

In my life, it is comparable to surrendering yourself 100% to someone who doesn’t love you and being totally humiliated and in pain for a sustained period of time and as a result, Christ through Mary comes to comfort you and pleasure you when you least expect it

I am presently at a stage, don’t know if it will last or not or what it means although perhaps it is the infused prayer that beckymarie speaks of, where I CANNOT pray. I used to be able to pray for hours a day, the Rosary, 12 of them, and now I struggle to say just one

My suggestion to you on how to gain that spiritual intimacy with Christ through Mary is to

1. read True Devotion to Mary. His Holiness Pope John Paul II called it a “decisive turning point” in his life and “read and re-read it in seminary”.
   Reflections on True Devotion to Mary by His Holiness Pope John Paul II http://www.michaeljournal.org/montfort.htm
2. devote yourself to Mary and learn as much as you can about her, praying the Rosary and other devotions such as the Chaplet of Seven Sorrows, Ave Maria Stella, Litlle Crown of the Blessed Virgin as often as possible - learn how to say it well with concentration, the The Secret of the Rosary explains the origin and name, prayers, mysteries, marvelous effects, proper dispositions, ways to combat distractions and pray the Rosary effectively, and Confraternities (so you can have the benefit of other people’s Rosaries as well) of the Most Holy Rosary.Someone once wrote of this book, *“Possibly the finest book ever written about the Rosary; appeals to all ages. Shows the great spiritual power of the Rosary, which is appreciated by few.” So there are secrets to praying the Rosary with devotion - the one I use is to add a little line commemorating the part Jesus played in the Mystery to the line of the hail mary.

e.g. The First Sorrowful Mystery: The Agony in the Garden.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Jesus, in agony. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Reading as much as you can on her: ***PURSUE Jesus through Mary and you will find them: ***

​

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. **

 

[AveSantaMaria]

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

Here are additional resource links for devotion to the Immaculate Heart of Mary.
**The Glories of Mary, ** by St. Alphonsus de Liguori, one of the 33 Doctors of the Catholic Church, explains Hail Holy Queen http://www.catholictradition.org/Mary/glories.htm
On the Dolors of Mary by St. Alphonsus de Liguori, one of the 33 Doctors of the Catholic Church, explains the sufferings of Our Lady http://writer.zoho.com/public/immaculate/Seven-dolors
Marialis Cultus (Apostolic Exhortation for the Right Ordering and Development of Devotion to the Blessed Virgin Mary of His Holiness, February 2, 1974 by His Holiness Pope Paul VI
ewtn.com/library/PAPALDOC/P6MARIAL.HTM
(P.S. this Marialis Cultus explains that the Rosary practice that I mentioned below was before common but is now slipping into disuse)

1. Devote yourself to the Eucharist. Go to DAILY MASS with honor and adoration. Keep the online web link for Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament open on the background of your computer. Start reading about Devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus en.wikisource.org/wiki/Devotion_to_the_Sacred_Heart_of_Jesus#FIRST_POINT._.E2.80.94_The_ardent_desire_Jesus_Christ_feels_to_be_with_us.
2. LOVE HUMILITY
   Say the Litany of Humility ewtn.com/Devotionals/prayers/humility.htm ** daily! Devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus has an excerpt on what true humility is. St. Therese of Liseux’s “little way” is about the love of humility in many ways: She talks about “joyful humility”, “passionate trust in merciful love”, “total abandoment to the divine will”, “HIDDEN SACRIFICES”, “zeal for souls”. “DON’T REFUSE THE SMALLEST SACRIFICE” I don’t remember the link for this. Maybe someone more knowledgeable than I might help me out

One of my favorite lines in the Litany of Humility is: “That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should” because I try my best to follow perfect Marian devotion to Jesus through Mary and fail miserably. But I hope that it is the immense and genuine effort that counts more than the results

1. Join the organizations of Our Lady so that you are working in partnership with other committed souls. (Have to admit that I personally haven’t done more than request free information from my church and the Militia of the Immaculata, www.consecration.com, and send info about these things to my friends yet)
2. START BUILDING UP THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN ON EARTH I started by first detaching myself from everything that severely hindered my relationship with Christ. In retrospect, I think that I was not loving enough. I gave up friendships when perhaps I might have suffered through them and considered it a hidden sacrifice if I had been at that point in my spiritual life. Maybe I should recommend the process of detachment be done in close communion with a holy priest who is a spiritual advisor. But God through Mary still loved my efforts to unite with him or I would never have experienced the divine spiritual intimacy with him through Mary that I did.

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. ***

 

[AveSantaMaria]

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

Later I began to do Christian ministry to others. They thought of me as a true friend. I thought of them as wonderful people that I befriend with the hopes of leading them to Christ, the divine true friend, though I hope to stay friends with people irregardless of how they respond to the message of the Gospel, just as God through Mary is. Later came involvement in the social justice work of the Church, particularly soup kitchen service and now I hope to work someday with people in hospices, with disabilities, in pro-life ministry, and with prisoners. I particulary admire Mel Gibson’s Christian ministry when he filmed the Passion of Christ and even flew to show this film to Sr. Lucy before she passed on to heaven. My real surrender came though - not just from doing this ministry and following Jesus Christ - but by doing it with total abandoment of self and in a way that exposed me to great humiliation. I did not seek out humiliation but I accepted it and it turned out to be the greatest turning point and maybe one of the hugest blessings in my life.

Maybe you can help build up the KINGDOM OF HEAVEN ON EARTH by involvement in both aposotlic work through an organization such as the Legion of Mary or the Militia of the Immaculata and as well though direct service in an organization such as Rachel’s Vineyard or your Church’s pro-life or service to the ill

PERHAPS IF YOU SEE YOURSELF AS AN INSTRUMENT TO SATISFY THE SACRED HEART OF JESUS THROUGH THE IMMACULATE HEART OF MARY THEY WILL SATISFY YOU

1. Read on the lives of the saints. Dark Night of the Soul by St. John of the Cross writes about the pain the soul undergoes as God through Mary purifies it so it can experience the higher stages of divine union with Christ. The saints have a lot of wisdom to share that can shape one’s ability to serve God through Mary, and my belief is that the theological experience written about was lived by the saints, particularly St. Faustina’s Divine Mercy in My Soul, which I haven’t finished because it is scary but I have learned a lot from so far such as Jesus’s words to her (paraphrased) Do not put your trust any creatures or I hate self-will

My favorites:
Diary of St. Faustina: Divine Mercy in My Soul saint-faustina.com/Diary/DMIMS1.shtml
Autobiography of St. Therese of Liseux: The Story of a Soul gutenberg.org/etext/16772
Confessions of St. Augustine newadvent.org/fathers/1101.htm

On spiritual advice, not autobiography:
True Devotion to the Blessed Virgin (St. Louis Mary de Montfort) montfort.org.uk/Writings/TrueDev.html
The Secret of the Rosary (St. Louis Mary de Montfort) montfort.org.uk/Writings/Rosary.html
Preparation for 33 Day Consecration to the Blessed Virgin (St. Louis Mary de Montfort) http://www.saintlouisdemontfort.com/consecration.cfm
Devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus (Collection of revelations/apparitions + commentary by the confessor of St. Margaret Mary Alacoque) en.wikisource.org/wiki/Devotion_to_the_Sacred_Heart_of_Jesus#FIRST_POINT._.E2.80.94_The_ardent_desire_Jesus_Christ_feels_to_be_with_us.
The Way of Perfection (St. Teresa of Avila) catholicfirst.com/TheFaith/CatholicClassics/StTeresa/way/wayofperfection.cfm
**Dark Night of the Soul ** (St. John of the Cross) ccel.org/ccel/john_cross/dark_night.html
**The Cathechism of the Catholic Church ** vatican.va/archive/catechism/ccc_toc.htm

Hope to read someday: already read profound excerpts of these works that I attempt to incorporate into my spiritual life so I list them anyways
Ascent of Mount Carmel ccel.org/ccel/john_cross/ascent.ii.vii.html
Spiritual Canticle karmel.at/ics/john/cn.html

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

 

[BarbaraTherese]

How to keep a long story short? I’m not perfect. I know my faults. But I have tried *very hard *to live my life right in God’s eyes: prayer, following the unpopular teachings, daily Rosary with kids, fasting weekly, prayingg for those who have hurt me, Perpetual Adoration, confession, recognizing and thanking God daily for the blessings in my life.

And yet… I still struggle with so many things. I find it incredibly difficult to sit still and keep my mind on the Rosary. I read and hear how people love saying it and find so much peace and joy in it. After twenty years of trying, it is as much a struggle as the day I started. My mind wanders and jumps, and sometimes I realize hours later I wandered right away from it and never got back. I often dread even trying to say it, for this reason. I find it almost impossible to meditate on the life of Jesus while saying it, and even when I’m thinking about the specific mystery, have this empty feeling of, “I know all about this, but what am I supposed to be getting out of it?”

I keep feeling that if I’d taught my children the faith well, and lived it myself, there’d be less fighting and fewer tantrums. (I do see progress, but it seems so slow.)

I wonder if I’m wrong in refusing to “be the peacemaker” in several situations (husband, in-laws, sister), but then, it looks to me as if continueing as we were is really only bearing the burden of abuse, keeping things peaceful for them, but not actually making real peace. I do not lash out at them, but I don’t reach out to them, either.

I am struggling with depression. I suppose this is what upsets me the most. I feel that if I’m doing all the right things, I ought to have some interior peace and even joy. I understand that life will always hand us plenty of problems, but I thought if I was living my faith, I’d have some peace in the midst of that, and maybe some wisdom about how to respond. I don’t. I heard a convert to the Catholic faith on the radio yesterday talking about how joy-filled her life has been since becoming Catholic.

Is there something else I should be doing to find this great peace and joy?

Probably your best move would be to discuss the above with a priest or religious sister or brother, nun, or even a layperson trained in spiritual direction. You’re doing everything right and experiencing very much the quite normal ins and outs, ups and downs, as it were of persevering in a good life or a life of virtue. What you may need is help to adjust your attitude and persective (including expectations) on it all. Spiritual Peace and Joy is within you and you certainly sound to me like someone very much in the state of Grace…you may need spiritual help to tap into that inner spiritual Peace and Joy and rest in it, find your home in it. “Come to me all you who labour and are burdened, and I will give you rest”.

Depression, it should be noted, can be an illness requiring medical treatment and/or counselling and if we think that we are suffering a persevering state of depression, we may need to seek the assistance of medicine in its various fields. We need to view these fields, including the use of prescribed medications if necessary, as gifts of God to mankind in our battle with suffering - and to be grateful for these gifts. A good spiritual guide will most always recognize when a depressed state is in need of medical attention.

Barb

 

[AveSantaMaria]

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

**Abandonment to Divine Providence: **(also by a confessor of St. Margaret Mary Alacoque) ccel.org/ccel/decaussade/abandonment.html
**Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius: **nwjesuits.org/JesuitSpirituality/SpiritualExercises.html

1. Maybe take 10 minutes a day to just listen to God through Mary. Do nothing but listen. Keep a spiritual journal and diary to chart growth in your daily life, write down key readings and prayers, talk to/listen to God, etc.

Seek ye first the kingdom of heaven and his righteousness and all these things will be added on to you. (Matthew 6:33)

“Pray without ceasing.”(1 Thesalonians 5:17)

I believe that the rigorous study recommended above is the component of Love the Lord your God with all your mind while the practice of what you learn is the heart and soul. Remember the 5th Joyful Mystery, the Finding in the Temple for the importance of true learning and study. Remember that before Jesus Christ started his ministry, he remained 30 years in hidden life with his mother. Remember, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life and only a few find it.”(Matthew 7:13-14)

BLESSINGS AND GRACES TO YOU FROM THE HOLY SPIRIT THROUGH MARY!!!

Publicize the messages of Fatima (that predicted the Holocaust) and Kibeho, Rwanda (that predicted the Rwandan genocide) Here is a New York Times article documenting the apparitions of the “Mother of the Word” in Kibeho, Rwanda in in the 1970s before the genocide. query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9400E4D81738F93BA35757C0A96F958260

Watch the YouTube, Messages of Our Lady in Zeitun, Egypt that I believe were caught on t.v. though I do not have a link of the televised apparitions and I’m not sure whether or not this is one. This short video captures the actual message very wonderfully and powerfully

youtube.com/watch?v=S_X8l9OcEDI&mode=related&search=

And the most important reason that I have for devoting myself to the Sacred Heart of Jesus through the Immaculate Heart of Mary, is that she is the shortest, securest path to Jesus. When you say Mary, she says Jesus!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

 

[holyrood]

I’ve been feeling the same way, however I recently heard Mother Angelica quote what an old woman she knew said,“If the Lord sends you tribulation, He expects you to tribulate”. That quote allows me to be easier on myself, at least

Thank you, Brigid. Maybe this is a big part of what I need to know.

Thank you, Becky. You have given me a lot to think about. I think I have regarded contemplative prayer as the next step, and not to be even considered when I can’t even say the Rosary. Is it ‘more advanced,’ or merely different? The funny thing is, I have NO problem saying the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. I can say that all day and not lose concentration, and have thought that I need to take that as a message that THAT is what I am supposed to be praying. What holds me back is always hearing how the Rosary is THE most powerful prayer, and what we should be praying daily. I try to pray it first, before the Divine Mercy, but of course often never get that far.

AveSantaMaria, you have given me a huge reading list! I’ve read many of these, although it’s been a few years for even the most recent. So, time to start again.

MaryLou, thank you for the encouragement. Yes, I do wonder just how bad it would be, otherwise, and wonder how all these people living completely in the world seem to have such good lives. I was trying to keep my other post short, but I feel overwhelmed with having grown up with a critical mother (and she’s still telling people ridiculous, negative, and untrue things about me from 20 and 30 years ago!) and now 20 years of marriage with husband and in-laws also being critical and unwelcoming. I seem to have no problem at all with anyone outside my family and in-laws, but I sometimes wonder if I’m really that awful, and have just managed to fool my friends and people I work with.

Barb, I have looked into thyroid issues (I have many of the symptoms) and know it can cause depression. The tests came back negative, although someone with thyroid problems told me the problems come and go and you have to get the tests on the days the thyroid is actually acting up, or it will come back negative. I’m not sure how to proceed with that. I also read a book saying if you’re right with God and have forgiven everyone, you will solve your own depression problems. I take that with a grain of salt, but it still left me feeling like a failure, and continuing to pursue true forgiveness. (According to some definitions, I have done that; but I don’t feel at peace about some of these things. I still feel hurt.)

Another question I have is, how do you find a good spiritual director?

 

[distracted]

. I find it incredibly difficult to sit still and keep my mind on the Rosary. . My mind wanders and jumps, and sometimes I realize hours later I wandered right away from it and never got back. ?

i wonder if maybe you suffer from “scrupulosity”…(?) I say this because: Why do you even try to keep your mind “on the rosary”…? why don’t you just pray the rosary and let wahtever thoughts come to you just come? I do that and i don’t feel there’s anything wrong with it. I mean, if you are never thinking about the mysterie of Christ’s life/death/resurrection while praying the rosary, i agree, something may be not quite “right” but you are human and God knows that… If you did not think about circumstances/relationships in your life while praying the rosary, then i would say that is rather abnormal…

the way i look at is: Whatever you think about / focus on while praying the rosary gets prayed for…

To me, that is a blessed thought…

 

[beckycmarie]

Thank you, Becky. You have given me a lot to think about. I think I have regarded contemplative prayer as the next step, and not to be even considered when I can’t even say the Rosary. Is it ‘more advanced,’ or merely different? The funny thing is, I have NO problem saying the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. I can say that all day and not lose concentration, and have thought that I need to take that as a message that THAT is what I am supposed to be praying. What holds me back is always hearing how the Rosary is THE most powerful prayer, and what we should be praying daily. I try to pray it first, before the Divine Mercy, but of course often never get that far.

I am such a beginner myself when it comes to contemplative prayer that there isn’t a whole lot of advice I can offer - other than being able to help with identify the beginnings of it.

I can tell you that it is a deeper version of prayer but that we never totally give up vocal prayer and meditation - those things will always have their place in our prayer lives.

Difficulty with meditation is one of the hallmarks of the call to contemplative prayer - the call to “be still and know He is God.” It’s one thing if prayer is dry because we’ve slacked off and are choosing deliberate mediocrity, but when we are doing all we can do to live the Christ life and our prayer is dry, it may be the start of infused prayer.

If you like to read, Fr. Thomas Dubay has a good book that explains contemplation using the works of St. Teresa of Avila, John of the Cross, and Scripture. You can read almost the entire book online here:

Fire Within by Fr. Thomas Dubay

 

[ConservativeOne]

I can’t tell you how grateful I am for this post.
I go through much of the same. I know I’m supposed to pray - required / requested to pray. I, too, read so many posters here speaking joyfully about their daily prayer schedules, etc. I’m too taken up with worldly things (God forgive me) that despite my plans to say even a Chaplet, I sometimes don’t get to it. I can’t keep my mind on the Rosary - since saying it alone, it seems to take so long…and I can’t keep my mind on meditating the mysteries.

This morning, strangely, before Mass - I looked at an image of the Sacred Heart and had such a feeling about His dying on the Cross for us - how could He do that for us? That suffering - what love ! During Mass, the idea came to me to make a Novena to the Infant of Prague today. And yet, I went home and didn’t. I’m too lazy or tired to say prayers at times? Television sure doesn’t help. At least, you’ve done “all the right things”, as you say. I keep Novena booklets, prayer cards, etc., planning to organize them into something that will become a daily schedule for me, but I never get to do it.

God bless all those who are doing what God and Our Lady requests. Please pray that this poor sinner finds their way!

 

[beckycmarie]

Hi ConservativeOne,

Someone posted this link in another thread, and then puzzleannie had some really good commentary on it. I’m going to quote her below the link:

The Seven Daily Habits of Holy Apostolic People

no problem with any or all of these devotions. my suggestion is, based on advice of classical Christian spiritual direction, is that if these are things you are not already doing regularly, choose only one to begin with, to do, or to add to your daily prayer now, or perhaps one in the morning and one in the evening. Do this rather than making too ambitious and demanding a schedule. the reason is if you find yourself unable to stick to this, you will be tempted to give yourself an excuse to give up that daily prayer time all together. Multiplicity of devotions for their own sake adds little or nothing to the quality of your prayer. Concentrate instead on praying in whatever one of these ways you choose faithfully, for a shorter period of time to begin with, but be faithful, do it daily, at the same time, and make that time a priority over all else. Obviously you will not neglect Sunday Mass and the sacraments, which are a given.

I endorse the advice given on the link above, and would recommend slowly adding one of these at a time, until you are able to carry out all of them faithfully, before worrying about new devotions. If you only have time for one, or on a real busy day when there is only time for one, the daily examen IMO should never be skipped, and should be the first thing you add.

(That whole thread has quite a bit of good advice, btw. )

Your experience today looking at the image of the Sacred Heart is significant. Keep that up, and it won’t be long before a glance at a Crucifix has you thinking, “How can I not be completely and utterly in love with the One who did that for me?”

 

[lovemysix]

I won’t even pretend to have all the answers for you, but I did want to respond to this:

“I also read a book saying if you’re right with God and have forgiven everyone, you will solve your own depression problems. I take that with a grain of salt, but it still left me feeling like a failure,”

I’m sorry, but as a person who suffered through years of depression because I was too proud to admit I needed help and had family members that despised getting any kind of help for clinical depression because prayer alone should cure it, I just have to say…that’s a bunch of bunk, That makes about as much sense as telling a diabetic that if they get right with God and forgive everybody, they will cure their diabetes.

True clinical depression (and it does sound like you might have some symptoms of it) is a CHEMICAL IMBALANCE. Not that God couldn’t choose to perform a miracle, but short of that, prayers aren’t going to get your brain chemicals in balance any more than they are going to start making a diabetic’s body start producing insulin.

I don’t mean to sound harsh, but as somebody who suffered for years before getting help because of similar unfounded notions and beliefs, I feel very strongly that God has given us the miracles of modern medicine for a reason and that if we have a health problem, we owe it to ourselves, our family members, and our God to seek help for it.

BTW, it was only when my very wonderful husband sat me down one day and said, “Enough! I deserve better, our kids deserve better, and YOU deserve better than this!” that I had the courage to call a psychiatric nurse practitioner. After some counseling, she and I decided to try an antidepressant, and in three weeks, my life had TURNED AROUND. I’m not saying that antidepressants cured every little problem in my life, but they did give me the ability to be able to handle all those little problems,and most of all to put those problems in perspective.

I don’t know you, and I have no idea whether you truly suffer clinical depression or not, but you seem to think you might, and that’s enough for me to suggest that perhaps you should have a thorough physical check-up and seek help determining if you have a chemical imbalance.

I wish you peace and happiness.

Lauren

 

[Strategery]

Remember Christ’s words: If you remain in me, you will be my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. (John 8)

First step in all of that is remaining in Christ. Whatever helps you do THAT is the best prayer.

For many, the Rosary does this. But I’m like you, my mind wanders with the Rosary as well.

For me personally, my best and deepest prayers are when I empty my heart to God - tell him what is bothering me and ask Him for guidance. Turn myself over to Him and ask Him to turn me into the kind of person he wants me to be. A big thing that I’ve found great value in is asking Him to increase my faith. If that is in your heart, go ahead and ask for it - He’ll return that prayer in spades.

I’m kind of rambling here, but what I’m trying to say is take your question to God. He will provide an answer.