Need Guidance

[peteysmom]

Hello - I am new to the site. I am searching some for some guidance. This may sound odd, but, here it goes. My husband recently has found God. This is a wonderful thing. He has struggled with additiction for many years, and a much confusion with his family after his mother passed in 2001. This has really opened him up and he really is doing great. Ok, the odd part is, that I in a sense that since this, about a month now, it seems we are still growing apart as a couple, rather than closer. He has been consumed with wanting a sign from God. I think the sign is he finally opened his eyes and heart more. He will lock himself in the bedroom and pray, read the Bible for hours. Me and my son feel like we suddenly do not fit it?? Since he has brought God more into our lives, I do try to think more before being so negative at work, we are going to Church every Sunday, we say a prayer together. Why do I feel he is pulling more away? Please do not get me wrong, I do think this is wonderful, I just do not fully understand and feeling very guilty and confused. I apologive for such a long blog, just needed to get this out there. Thank you for your time.

 

[Kristen]

Welcome to the Forums!

I doubt that I’m the best one to offer guidance, but I can offer a couple of thoughts and prayers for you.

First, have you told your husband what you’ve put in your post, especially that you and your son feel like you no longer fit in his life? If not, he may not be aware that there is a critical issue he needs to address. It may take him some time to figure-out how to respond, but at least you’ll have engaged him to begin discerning a response.

Second, as one who has experienced the last four years as constant, dramatic (and, at times, traumatic) change, I would think that this newfound fervor of your husband (as blessed as it is for him) will level-off in time and some balance will return to your family life. After all, if he is listening to God, God will lead him to find ways to live holiness in the course of the family life he has been called to. It would not fit for God to call a married man with a son to a life of prayer withdrawn from the world!

Third, as one who *always *feels guilty about things myself, I will leave you with a thought my husband often reminds me of: An uncomfortable feeling (such as hurt or anxiety) does not always mean that you are doing anything wrong or that someone is wronging you. Sometimes the feeling is a cross, and carrying crosses is a healthy part of Christian life.

I hope these thoughts are of some help or comfort. You are in my prayers. I will entrust your intentions to Our Lady when I pray my next Rosary.

Kristen

 

[peteysmom]

Kristen ~ Thank you! After reading your post, I really feel enlightened. I really do appreciate your time, your concern, and your prayers.

God Bless you and your family,
Kim (aka Petey’s Mom)

 

[pyropam]

First and foremost… GOD MUST COME FIRST!

It may sound a little cruel, but are you jealous of GOD?

Have a talk with your husband, ask him if you can sincerely pray with him. Remember what the scripture says… when two or more gather in my name, there I will be also.

A spiritual retreat for families would be great.

I’ll be praying for him, I’ll also be praying for you.

 

[peteysmom]

Thank you for your post - It shook me up a bit when I read your question,“but are you jealous of GOD”. Oh my goodness, no.
It is has been so hard for me to put in words my confusion. And, I understand it is my confusion, not his. I feel guilty as I mentioned for feeling this way. It is so strange. I am so happy for my husband. It is more of a work in progress for me. I truly believe we just need to find a balance as a family, together.

Thank you and God Bless you!

 

[ack]

Hi,

This seems like a common situation. On these forums, we often get posts from spouses on the other side of the issue – they feel distanced from their spouses after finding God.

Luckily, the problem seems to resolve itself with time.

Hello - I am new to the site. I am searching some for some guidance. This may sound odd, but, here it goes. My husband recently has found God. This is a wonderful thing. He has struggled with additiction for many years, and a much confusion with his family after his mother passed in 2001. This has really opened him up and he really is doing great. Ok, the odd part is, that I in a sense that since this, about a month now, it seems we are still growing apart as a couple, rather than closer. He has been consumed with wanting a sign from God. I think the sign is he finally opened his eyes and heart more. He will lock himself in the bedroom and pray, read the Bible for hours. Me and my son feel like we suddenly do not fit it?? Since he has brought God more into our lives, I do try to think more before being so negative at work, we are going to Church every Sunday, we say a prayer together. Why do I feel he is pulling more away? Please do not get me wrong, I do think this is wonderful, I just do not fully understand and feeling very guilty and confused. I apologive for such a long blog, just needed to get this out there. Thank you for your time.

 

[Em_in_FL]

Hi and welcome!
I’ve never been involved in a major conversion/reversion situation, as my husband and I are both “cradle catholics”… so I may not have the best insight in this situation…

But my only advice is to TALK to him. It sounds as if you’re very open to him exploring faith and you simply want to be involved. TELL him this! Tell him that you love him and you’re extrememly happy for him and want to be included! Ask him to invite you in when he reads the bible and to read it aloud as a family.
My only thoughts are that he may *think *you’re against his new found excitement of the faith… hence why he’s locking himself up in the room.
ASK him to include YOU!

I will keep your family in my prayers… God bless!