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duskyjewel
Guest
This is not Church teaching. Simply being homosexual or having SSA is not sinful. Acting upon it is. If the wife refrains from acting upon her sexual urges with anyone outside her marriage, she commits no sin.
- Status
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jwashu
Guest
Very moving Beachgal, you guys are definitely in my prayers, keep focused on Christ and keep up the good work.
To the OP, Life gives us crosses, God gives us the grace and ability to deal with them.
You and your wife are in a difficult situation but I firmly believe that with His help, you can make it through.
Right or wrong our society promotes, especially for young women IMHO, bi curiousity. For someone who has these inate feelings these images, stories etc… can hurt or help.
For BG it’s helping because she and her husband have addressed this together. Think of your wifes position. My guess would be that she is hiding this because she feels ashamed and dosen’t know what to do… possibly worried that if you knew she was having these feelings you wouldn’t love her anymore etc…
The Sacrament of Marraige calls us to Love our Wives as Christ loved the Church. That’s Agape… unconditional love. I believe that if you can show her how much she means and that you love her regardless of her SSA, you guys can make it. It’s going to take a lot of work on her part AND yours.
Talk to your Priest about this or seek out a Priest who has expertise in dealing with this.
As others have said, SSA is not a sin, ACTING on SSA is a sin… 2 if you are bound by your marraige vow before God.
You are in my prayers!
Joe
To the OP, Life gives us crosses, God gives us the grace and ability to deal with them.
You and your wife are in a difficult situation but I firmly believe that with His help, you can make it through.
Right or wrong our society promotes, especially for young women IMHO, bi curiousity. For someone who has these inate feelings these images, stories etc… can hurt or help.
For BG it’s helping because she and her husband have addressed this together. Think of your wifes position. My guess would be that she is hiding this because she feels ashamed and dosen’t know what to do… possibly worried that if you knew she was having these feelings you wouldn’t love her anymore etc…
The Sacrament of Marraige calls us to Love our Wives as Christ loved the Church. That’s Agape… unconditional love. I believe that if you can show her how much she means and that you love her regardless of her SSA, you guys can make it. It’s going to take a lot of work on her part AND yours.
Talk to your Priest about this or seek out a Priest who has expertise in dealing with this.
As others have said, SSA is not a sin, ACTING on SSA is a sin… 2 if you are bound by your marraige vow before God.
You are in my prayers!
Joe
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nobeerinheaven
Guest
You make very good points. If I were the OP, I would also ask a tribunal to look into the circumstances of the marriage. What a terrible thing to have to deal with - I feel awful for you.
Two things:Wow…I’m not only surprised, I’m shocked to see comments like “That makes me sick” from people who consider themselves Catholic. Where would we be if Jesus had said that to the woman at the well? To the adulteress? To Mary Magdelene?
(1) I didn’t say anything like “You make me sick” I said “*that *makes me sick” where ‘that’ is ambiguous between (1) the OPs wife trying to engage in such a terribly grave sin or (2) her as a person (or something else entirely, like the fact that he is upset about it
). As it happens, I was referring to the sin - which does, in fact, make me sick as it should make anyone sick who takes the fact of hell seriously. It certainly made St. Paul sick when he described the “*shameful *lusts” of SSA in the opening of his letter to the Romans. I’m glad humans are given this natural response to many sins like incest or cannibalism, and am happy that this natural response mechanism has not been clouded in me by sin-tolerant “sensitivity.” The broad path Christ refers to is paved with such sensitivity.(2) You seriously misunderstand Jesus’ ministry if you think he had anything but vitriol against sin. This often happens, I think, because people confuse Christ’s infinite capacity to forgive with his sayings like “judge not, lest ye be judged.” Christ gave many hard teachings, and many of his disciples left him for these teachings - such as his teaching on divorce, for instance. Christ called us to be perfect as his Father in heaven is perfect, and when he came across sinners he always repudiated their sin and told them to do those things no longer. He also referred to Hell more than anywhere else in the Scriptures. Perhaps you are unaware, but one of the works of spiritual mercy is to admonish the sinner, which comes easily through the singular grace that is repugnance toward these sins. Moreover, *my *feelings of reprehension toward those sins pale in comparison to the infinite reprehension God has toward sin; just like my feelings of love for my wife pale in comparison to God’s infinite love. I think you are confused if you somehow think it is more truly Catholic to enable sin through passive neglect or willful tolerance of objective mortal sin. Given the circumstances described by the OP, I would seriously consider taking Other Eric’s advice and look into annulment proceedings. That is certainly what I would do if anything like this were ever to happen to me - God forbid that they ever do.
O
Other_Eric
Guest
If you think I use the term “intrinsic evil” to refer to anything other than the condition of same-sex desire, I regret to inform you that you have misread my post. Since the Church does teach that the inclination is intrinsically evil and since the woman in question incubates such, the children become exposed to something that could threaten their formation in the faith as well as their physical safety.
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nobeerinheaven
Guest
Other Eric: Do you mind citing a Church document confirming your position on SSA itself being evil (independent of acting on SSA)? I have always heard that the Church teaches the inclination is morally permissible, but psychologically disordered - i.e. no sin.
C
canne
Guest
OtherEric , this statement confuses me and I too would like to know where you find this position in Church teaching.
From the Cathecism below.
**2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition. **2359 Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.
It is my understanding that Homosexual desires are not in themselves sinful.
From the Cathecism below.
**2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition. **2359 Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.
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nobeerinheaven
Guest
Canne, that’s neither here nor there. Adulterers should be respected and not discriminated against too, but that doesn’t mean adultery is not a sin.
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Swan
Guest
Actually, I think it is here or there. The claim that any children of the marriage would be in danger for their souls and physical safety make this an important issue, espcially if the woman does not actually commit adultary and the marriage continues.
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gambino
Guest
I am going through the process of divorce because of this issue, all I can encourage you is to be careful when confronting your spouse. I was in a very similar situation very recently. I found out by her odd behavior and then looked at our family computer that told the sad truth. She denied it but it was obvious and has led to a very bad seperation. I will probably never talk to her again. One regret is that I lost her completely from my life–I miss my friend. My biggest regret though is that it propelled her deeper into a life of bisexual-“ism” violating the covenant of marriage. I just hope that she finds her faith again. It pains me to think that I my partner and lover may never get to heaven and I can’t do anything about it.
If I could make one suggestion, I would be gentle but firm in your resolve of this issue. Figure out if there are mental health issues (like bi-polar) that might lead her to act out sexually against her better judgement. I suspect that this may be the case with my wife. I will pray for you tonight. Please pray for us (my wife and me) as well.
If I could make one suggestion, I would be gentle but firm in your resolve of this issue. Figure out if there are mental health issues (like bi-polar) that might lead her to act out sexually against her better judgement. I suspect that this may be the case with my wife. I will pray for you tonight. Please pray for us (my wife and me) as well.
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LSK
Guest
Church teaching on homosexuality can be found in the Catechism:
[2357](javascriptpenWindow(‘cr/2357.htm’)
Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. **Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity,141 tradition has always declared that “homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered.”**142 They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.
2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition. [2359](javascriptpenWindow(‘cr/2359.htm’) Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.
I know I am one of those sticklers, but I do not see ‘evil’, I read ‘disordered’.
As Catholics know, chastity does not always equal celibacy. For a woman or man who suffers from SSA but who has made the concious decision to enter into the Sacrament of Marriage this would mean that they would be willing sexual partners with their spouse and not look outside the marriage for ANY kind of sexual satisfaction. If the potential spouse has entered into the marriage with a full understanding of the struggles this person will face throughout their life, they would have a difficult time proving to a tribunal that they now qualify for an annullment.
I think the advice given by the ‘almost’ Catholic (welcome home, btw!) was well thought out and based on experience. You and your wife have a difficult road ahead of you. While I do not envy your cross, I know that the suffering you two may endure together will help many people into heaven. God never gives us more than we can handle - and He must think very highly of YOU to draw you so close in suffering to Him.
[2357](javascript
penWindow(‘cr/2357.htm’) Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. **Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity,141 tradition has always declared that “homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered.”**142 They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition. [2359](javascript
penWindow(‘cr/2359.htm’) Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.I know I am one of those sticklers, but I do not see ‘evil’, I read ‘disordered’.
As Catholics know, chastity does not always equal celibacy. For a woman or man who suffers from SSA but who has made the concious decision to enter into the Sacrament of Marriage this would mean that they would be willing sexual partners with their spouse and not look outside the marriage for ANY kind of sexual satisfaction. If the potential spouse has entered into the marriage with a full understanding of the struggles this person will face throughout their life, they would have a difficult time proving to a tribunal that they now qualify for an annullment.
I think the advice given by the ‘almost’ Catholic (welcome home, btw!) was well thought out and based on experience. You and your wife have a difficult road ahead of you. While I do not envy your cross, I know that the suffering you two may endure together will help many people into heaven. God never gives us more than we can handle - and He must think very highly of YOU to draw you so close in suffering to Him.
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nobeerinheaven
Guest
I think most people take “acts of grave depravity” to be synonymous with “acts of grave evil.”Church teaching on homosexuality can be found in the Catechism:
[2357](javascript
2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition. [2359](javascript
I know I am one of those sticklers, but I do not see ‘evil’, I read ‘disordered’.
Or are you talking about SSA in general? If the latter, then we’ve covered that ground - calling something disordered is compatible with calling it a sin. What would be decisive is if the Catechism called it “merely disordered” or something like that. We need a text definitively saying it is a sin or it is not a sin, not calling it something else entirely beyond those two categories.
M
manualman
Guest
It’s really not that hard to understand the difference. Homosexual sex acts are sinful. A homosexual inclination is disordered, but not sinful unless acted upon.
To put it into words we heteros can understand: I’m a married man. Sexual passion for my wife is properly ordered; both the inclination and the actions are not just OK, they are divinely authored. But if I were to be sexually attracted by a woman at work, that would be a DISordered sexual attraction (because I’m already married). It isn’t SINFUL unless I take action on the attraction or fantasize about it, but even experiencing the temptation is an indication that I’m still a sinful man and need the Grace of God to finish sanctifying me before I’m fit for heaven.
Same goes for those with SSAs. The inclination is disordered and indicates that the person (like virtually ALL of us) isn’t ready to enter heaven just yet, but just experiencing the inclination itself isn’t ITSELF sinful. It’s just one among many markers of fallen human nature.
To put it into words we heteros can understand: I’m a married man. Sexual passion for my wife is properly ordered; both the inclination and the actions are not just OK, they are divinely authored. But if I were to be sexually attracted by a woman at work, that would be a DISordered sexual attraction (because I’m already married). It isn’t SINFUL unless I take action on the attraction or fantasize about it, but even experiencing the temptation is an indication that I’m still a sinful man and need the Grace of God to finish sanctifying me before I’m fit for heaven.
Same goes for those with SSAs. The inclination is disordered and indicates that the person (like virtually ALL of us) isn’t ready to enter heaven just yet, but just experiencing the inclination itself isn’t ITSELF sinful. It’s just one among many markers of fallen human nature.
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nobeerinheaven
Guest
Regardless of whether we can find definitive textual proof that SSA is or is not sinful (over and above being disordered), I feel absolutely awful for the OP. I could only imagine how devastating that would be to find out something that terrible. I’m glad I would have never taken a woman seriously when dating had I found out she had some sort of latent or repressed SSA. An admission like that would have more than likely ended the relationship, then and there. It makes me sick that the OP was still compassionate toward her, despite that, eventually marrying her - and she betrayed that compassion and sympathy in such a grave and awful way.
G
gambino
Guest
I’m surprised by this comment… Have you ever heard the quote “but for the grace of God go I.” Its like telling a homeless guy “I would never be homeless because I studied hard in school and have a good job.” Things happen. Our best laid plans and intentions don’t always work out, especially when another person is involved.I’m glad I would have never taken a woman seriously when dating had I found out she had some sort of latent or repressed SSA. An admission like that would have more than likely ended the relationship, then and there. It makes me sick that the OP was still compassionate toward her, despite that, eventually marrying her - and she betrayed that compassion and sympathy in such a grave and awful way.
I think the true issue illustrates the sad times we are living in. His wife is trying to cheat-very simple. It is the same thing as if he were posting on Match.com for other girls or coming home and looking at porn. The blame falls squarely on her in this case. When he got married, all he could do was trust that she was being honest about being able to control her bisexual passions. Her not being truthful to her word, despite her “intentions”, is the real error in this situation. I truly believe that some of the homosexual/bisexual tendencies that people have are brought to the forefront of our thoughts because of the constant media attention to this issue. It is so encouraged to “be who you really are” that it doesn’t matter how it affects others. What used to be shameful is now celebrated. Hedonism is king now because it is louder and easier than the suttle cry of a true marriage covenant made by God. In my case, my marriage was just one of many victims of that. In the past, these tendencies would have been just that, tendencies and no further. People might have noticed that a guy was a little more sensitive or a girl had certain interests. Her struggle should be no more than a “normal” guy avoiding looking lustfully at other women. Yet by entertaining this aspect of her, she is turning bisexuality into a god and woshiping it instead of our one true Father. All I can say is that she needs prayers. This could be a passing phase but it is his responsibility to confront the issue. It will not be easy. I hope you are more successful at it than I was.
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leonie
Guest
There was an inspiring story of a bisexual wife and husband who were able to save their marriage in *Amazing Grace for Catholic Couples. *
ascensionpress.com/shop/Scripts/prodView.asp?idproduct=238
ascensionpress.com/shop/Scripts/prodView.asp?idproduct=238
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nobeerinheaven
Guest
I think you mean “but for the grace of God, there go I” and, of course, I have heard it and believe it thoroughly, which is why I don’t know the reason you are surprised. Everything you and I said was compatible. Being saddened or sickened by the depths sin can sink a person is in no way being haughty against those people sucked down into grave sin. Abortion, incest, rape, adultery, and homosexuality all make me sad - and at times - sick. Mixing and matching from that list only intensifies my emotional reaction. Why people seem upset at this, I can only speculate - perhaps they are taking the “Love the sinner, hate the sin” mantra so far that they’ve dropped the latter, qualifying, clause. I’ll retain it, for what that’s worth.
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lucyben
Guest
Well, i know many LGBT. espcially bisexual single, bisexual couples and bi curious at bimingle.com . can view the bisexual style photos. hot but also honest girl and cute.
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Beachgal
Guest
Gambino, I’m so very sorry for what you and your wife are going through. I know it’s extremely painful and I regret that you feel you’ve not only lost a friend but that your wife has lost her faith. You’ll both be in my prayers and my thoughts. Even though it’s not a Catholic organization, you might consider reading or joining Straight Spouses (info on it is in my first post in this thread). I think you might find a great deal of healing just knowing you aren’t alone in your pain. :hug1: You may also find some support, comfort, etc. in a book called The Other Side of the Closet: The Coming-Out Crisis for Straight Spouses and Families by Amity Pierce Buxton. I’ve heard a lot of great things about it and several lesbian/bi women I know who are married have said it was really comforting for their husbands. I don’t have any experience with this book, but there’s also one called When Your Spouse Comes Out: A Straight Mate’s Recovery Manual by Carol Grever and Deborah Bowman.
I really don’t want to start a flame war. I realize that many of us have different points of view–but if we truly consider ourselves Christian, and especially if we consider ourselves Catholic, we’re all sisters and brothers in Christ, right? I think that demands a certain amount of consideration and kindness in our replies to each other, regardless of our differing opinions.
In that spirit, here are some things to consider. I’m *definitely *not a theologian, a scholar, or an expert in Catholic rule, traditions, etc. Though I’ve attended a Catholic church for five years and become deeply involved, I only began the RCIA process in the last couple of months. So these are things that others have written, I’ve found online, and thought were worth sharing.
But simply *having *an SSA and acting on it does not harm others. I don’t think it’s on the same par as killing or intentionally hurting others in irreparable ways. That’s just my feeling on it.
I believe that in scripture it tells us that God asks us to talk to our brothers and sisters when they sin and to counsel them. He asks us to support them in rejecting their former sinful ways. But he doesn’t ask us to approach them in a judgemental manner–and I daresay that most people are much more likely to be defensive in the face of vitriolic judgement than they would be to actually listen and consider an end to their sinning. I believe we are asked to “tell the truth with great love.”
I think I may have found the source for the phrase “intrinsic evil” though I firmly oppose any such belief. I’m disappointed to see it came from our current Pope, though it was said many years ago.
The bottom truth–we are ***all ***sinners. As Gambino deftly put it, just because our life is good now and we are strong in our resistance to temptation, doesn’t mean that things will be the same tomorrow or next week. When I say the Our Father, I always think of “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us” as meaning that I will be forgiven in the same way that I forgive others.
I woke up at the age of 29 with an SSA I had not known existed. You may think it could never happen to you, but I’ve heard of people in their 40s and even 50s realizing that this temptation was part of their life. Think of how you’d want to be treated and thought of if this happened to you. You *don’t *have to condone or accept something you think of as sinful. But I do believe that we are called to love one another and to treat each other with that love.
One last thing. If you’re talking about the affects of adultery on children, I’d agree that it can affect them strongly and cause damage. However, if those who were discussing the possibility of harm to any children (or their faith) of the OP’s marriage *simply *because of his wife’s SSA, I’m really shocked. If being tempted to sin is something that can harm our children, then ALL of our children are already harmed. I would think that a parent who suffers greatly from temptation but is able to resist it would not harm their children but could only *increase *the formation of their faith by his/her example.
However, I can see how someone could form that kind of opinion–
I’m totally confused by that. Numerous studies have shown not only that children of gay parents (regardless of whether they are natural children or adopted children) are no more likely to be gay than children of heterosexual parents. Studies have also shown that children raised by gay parents are not only just as psychologically healthy as those raised by heterosexual parents, but that they are often more healthy and happy. You can read more here. Here’s a snippet from the findings:
I hope I have written this in the spirit of love I think is so essential. If I have managed to hurt someone, I greatly regret it. :grouphug:
I really don’t want to start a flame war. I realize that many of us have different points of view–but if we truly consider ourselves Christian, and especially if we consider ourselves Catholic, we’re all sisters and brothers in Christ, right? I think that demands a certain amount of consideration and kindness in our replies to each other, regardless of our differing opinions.
In that spirit, here are some things to consider. I’m *definitely *not a theologian, a scholar, or an expert in Catholic rule, traditions, etc. Though I’ve attended a Catholic church for five years and become deeply involved, I only began the RCIA process in the last couple of months. So these are things that others have written, I’ve found online, and thought were worth sharing.
I realize that sin *is *sin, regardless of the degree, and that the punishment of sin, by God, is the same, no matter what. But I still find it distressing that people would compare adultery, incest, cannabalism, abortions, and homosexuality as if they were all on the same level. Lying is a sin. Murder is a sin. Should we feel the same way about both crimes? Adultery and incest can hurt very innocent parties (i.e. children) but do not kill anyone. Abortion is death, as is cannabalism. Homosexuality, on the other hand, by itself, doesn’t hurt anyone else. In cases where a person marries and later leaves due to their SSA, people can be hurt.
But simply *having *an SSA and acting on it does not harm others. I don’t think it’s on the same par as killing or intentionally hurting others in irreparable ways. That’s just my feeling on it.
I believe that in scripture it tells us that God asks us to talk to our brothers and sisters when they sin and to counsel them. He asks us to support them in rejecting their former sinful ways. But he doesn’t ask us to approach them in a judgemental manner–and I daresay that most people are much more likely to be defensive in the face of vitriolic judgement than they would be to actually listen and consider an end to their sinning. I believe we are asked to “tell the truth with great love.”
I think I may have found the source for the phrase “intrinsic evil” though I firmly oppose any such belief. I’m disappointed to see it came from our current Pope, though it was said many years ago.
I don’t have quick access to the original document, but I know I read this on a statement issued by the Church. If you look for it, I’m sure you’ll find it.
If you see all sins as equal, then the sin of prejudice and discrimination against homo- and bisexuals (i.e. feeling that parents with an SSA are likely to harm their children just by being part of the children’s family, feeling “sick” about an inclination that these people did *not *choose but which many choose to *not *give in to, etc.), is equal to the sin you are rejecting, right?
The bottom truth–we are ***all ***sinners. As Gambino deftly put it, just because our life is good now and we are strong in our resistance to temptation, doesn’t mean that things will be the same tomorrow or next week. When I say the Our Father, I always think of “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us” as meaning that I will be forgiven in the same way that I forgive others.
I woke up at the age of 29 with an SSA I had not known existed. You may think it could never happen to you, but I’ve heard of people in their 40s and even 50s realizing that this temptation was part of their life. Think of how you’d want to be treated and thought of if this happened to you. You *don’t *have to condone or accept something you think of as sinful. But I do believe that we are called to love one another and to treat each other with that love.
One last thing. If you’re talking about the affects of adultery on children, I’d agree that it can affect them strongly and cause damage. However, if those who were discussing the possibility of harm to any children (or their faith) of the OP’s marriage *simply *because of his wife’s SSA, I’m really shocked.
If being tempted to sin is something that can harm our children, then ALL of our children are already harmed. I would think that a parent who suffers greatly from temptation but is able to resist it would not harm their children but could only *increase *the formation of their faith by his/her example.However, I can see how someone could form that kind of opinion–
Can someone explain to me how being raised by same-sex parents could disturb a child’s “full human development?”
I’m totally confused by that. Numerous studies have shown not only that children of gay parents (regardless of whether they are natural children or adopted children) are no more likely to be gay than children of heterosexual parents. Studies have also shown that children raised by gay parents are not only just as psychologically healthy as those raised by heterosexual parents, but that they are often more healthy and happy. You can read more here. Here’s a snippet from the findings:This is obviously long enough.
I hope I have written this in the spirit of love I think is so essential. If I have managed to hurt someone, I greatly regret it. :grouphug:
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blessedtoo
Guest
I applaud your earnest search for truth. I would recommend that you, as a soon-to-be-Catholic, avail yourself of some orthodox Catholic literature on this subject. Two books that I have found helpful are:
amazon.com/Courage-Be-Chaste-Benedict-Groeschel/dp/0809127059/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1204794755&sr=1-1
amazon.com/Truth-About-Homosexuality-Cry-Faithful/dp/0898705835
What you have quoted here is the personal opinion of one priest who is in direct dissent from Church teaching. You will not find any teaching from the Magesterium that states homosexual behavior is acceptable in any situation or “partnership”. As you continue your journey into the Church, you should be careful about the websties and statements you read because you will find many who will depart from Church teaching.
Again, as a new Catholic, you might want to check out some Catholic organizations that minister to homosexuals and their families. A visit to the Encourage website will dispel your erroneous notion that homosexuality, “by itself”, does not hurt anyone. There are many families who are torn apart by the news that their children or siblings are homosexual.Homosexuality, on the other hand, by itself, doesn’t hurt anyone else. In cases where a person marries and later leaves due to their SSA, people can be hurt.
Again, visit:
couragerc.net/
It certainly hurts the active homosexual in irreparable ways.
Why are you disappointed? Our Pope, and all his predecessors, did not state that the homosexual PERSON is intrinsically evil, but that the inclination itself is. Don’t you agree that all inclinations to sin are evil?
No one is suggesting that prejudice or discrimination is acceptable. Why bring this up? All sins may or may not be equal - that is irrelevent. Sin, of itself, separates the sinner from God, whether it is the sin of murder, adultery, or immoral sexual behavior. I feel sick about ALL the inclination I have to sin. Don’t you? I pray daily that God will remove these inclinations from me, so that I do not have to struggle so desperately to achieve holiness. Should we revel in our inclinations to sin or seek to overcome them?If you see all sins as equal, then the sin of prejudice and discrimination against homo- and bisexuals (i.e. feeling that parents with an SSA are likely to harm their children just by being part of the children’s family, feeling “sick” about an inclination that these people did *not *choose but which many choose to *not *give in to, etc.), is equal to the sin you are rejecting, right?
So by this logic, no one except for the sinless (and there were only two) can point out the sin in our brothers? How then do you suggest we spread the Gospel and evangelize if we can not judge sin?
I don’t know where your study came from and I don’t want to engage in a battle of studies. I could certainly provide countless proofs for you that children raised by two married opposite sex parents are more successful in every area of life than those raised in any other environment. The results of countless studies reveal this obvious truth time and time again. The very new concept of homosexual couples raising children has not existed long enough to garner any solid proofs for or against but I will go out on a limb here by saying that children REQUIRE and have a right to be with parents of opposite sexes who can model appropriate parental roles. Two dads or two moms can not do this and the child will absolutely suffer from this lack of modeling.Can someone explain to me how being raised by same-sex parents could disturb a child’s “full human development?”
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nobeerinheaven
Guest
blessedtoo, I couldn’t have said it better myself. 
Just to reaffirm, though, homosexuality (among many other sins) is intrinsically evil. That means it is, of itself, evil - no matter what the consequences, good, bad or neutral. No one can act on these impulses of SSA without a very real danger of the fires of hell.
Just to reaffirm, though, homosexuality (among many other sins) is intrinsically evil. That means it is, of itself, evil - no matter what the consequences, good, bad or neutral. No one can act on these impulses of SSA without a very real danger of the fires of hell.
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