Need Help

[McUait]

Sorry in advance if this is the wrong place for this post. I am converting (methodist) this Easter Vigil Mass. This has been a 3 year process for me. Here is where I need your help. I have to admit I am concerned with so many reports of child sexual abuse by our Preist. I am hoping that you, my sisters and brothers can help me understand why this seems to be so wide spread, U.S., Ireland, now Germany. I know that this problem is not just in the Catholic Church but it does for some reason seem to attract many men who are prone to this mental disorder. Furthermore, I do understand that these people who made these grave mistakes are just that, people. It is not as if the Church herself is guilty of these actions. Please help me to make sense of why this is happening and why the Church has not done more to prevent this type of action. Im hoping for an objective response and not just that “the anti-Catholic media blows all of this out of proportion.” Thanks! God bless and please pray for my continued conversion.

 

[mariahloves]

Sorry in advance if this is the wrong place for this post. I am converting (methodist) this Easter Vigil Mass. This has been a 3 year process for me. Here is where I need your help. I have to admit I am concerned with so many reports of child sexual abuse by our Preist. I am hoping that you, my sisters and brothers can help me understand why this seems to be so wide spread, U.S., Ireland, now Germany. I know that this problem is not just in the Catholic Church but it does for some reason seem to attract many men who are prone to this mental disorder. Furthermore, I do understand that these people who made these grave mistakes are just that, people. It is not as if the Church herself is guilty of these actions. Please help me to make sense of why this is happening and why the Church has not done more to prevent this type of action. Im hoping for an objective response and not just that “the anti-Catholic media blows all of this out of proportion.” Thanks! God bless and please pray for my continued conversion.

I’m converting this Easter as well, from the Seventh-day Adventist church. I understand and respect your concern, you have every right to be a little apprehensive when you notice that Catholic sex abuse by priests seems to be widespread. It is very important to note that priests are individuals who have committed sins, it is NOT condoned by the Church, the Church’s teachings, the Bible, or Catholics themselves.

Pedophiles are crafty people who find occupations that will put themselves in positions of authority and respect in regards to children and their families. That is why you hear about teachers and coaches and pastors of every denomination being pedophiles. Most children are sexually abused by people they know and trust, neighbors, coaches, teachers, boy scouts leaders, family friends, relatives, parents, etc. very few cases occur with strangers molesting children. Becoming a priest may be a way for a pedophile who is a pedophile BEFORE they were a priest, DURING their time as a priest, and AFTER being a priest to gain trust from children and their family so they can more easily abuse them. Priests do not become pedophiles.

96% of priests were never accused of sexual abuse of minors from 1950 to 2002. Most priests do not molest children. I can only say that if you suspect a priest at a certain church is a pedophile (I feel that you can sometimes tell, without any proof just by their aura and stuff at least for me) then don’t attend that church. I’m sure other people here can be more helpful since some of them have been Catholic for decades and may have better more up to date statistics but don’t let these recent sensationalized reports stop you from becoming Catholic. Always pray and ask God to guide you in the right direction.

 

[Erin_Anne]

First off, Welcome to the Church! :getholy:

Second, in response to your question - No Religion is exempt from the efforts of Satan’s legions. There are going to be rotten apples in every bunch. BUT, they represent only a fraction of the population. Unfortunately we hear much more about Catholic Priests than we do anyone else, but its an issue in other Religions (and countless secular organizations) as well. Those who are guilty are WRONG, and those who attempt to cover for them are WRONG…and they will answer to God for their actions. No doubt, he’ll take care of them. The previous poster was absolutely correct in saying that pedophiles purposely put themselves into positions of power – they want access to the more vulnerable, and they know how to get it. Look at John Wayne Gacy. He dressed as a clown because he knew the kids would let their guards down…and they did.

We should also not forget that accusations made by some individuals are, indeed, false. However the general public won’t ever know how many were mere attempts to extort money, attention, or sympathy.

We as Catholics should Pray daily for our Priests, and for those who have suffered at the hands of those “rotten apples”. Justice will be served.

Erin-Anne

 

[LindaSK]

Welcome to both of you!!! You must be counting down to Easter Vigil. I was where you are three years ago!!! I counted down, went to daily Mass, and EVERYBODY knew how many days until I could receive Jesus in the Eucharist!!

Anyway, to try to put your concerns to rest. In discussing Holy Orders in RCIA, our priest talked about how seminarians are scrutinized to determine if they are truly meant to be priests. They may even go through the eight years of instruction, and it may be determined they should not and will not be ordained. Even as a church organist, I was required to attend a VIRTUS seminar (virtus.org/virtus/), because I could be in contact with children in the church. Most priests are conscientious and holy men. This is not a job, but a vocation, not a way to make a living, but a way of life.

While the secular media would draw our attention primarily to those priests who have committed abuses against children, we need to remember those priests are in the minority, and we need to support the majority of our priests who are living as they should, and are still the object of attacks because they are perceived by some to be guilty merely by association. As was pointed out, they were pedophiles first, and can be very good at deceiving people around them. Priests have to have Clearances, just as teachers, day care providers, etc. do. Pope Benedict is addressing the abuses, not attempting to bury them. I have no doubt this weighs heavily upon him.

I taught in a school district where we had a male teacher who was only 2-3 years from retirement when it came to light he had been abusing boys for years, and no one was aware of it. He was long tenured, and greatly respected as a teacher. As a district, we were in shock that this could go unnoticed for so long. It would have been unfair to judge all of us who were teaching beside him because of what he did. People do have the right to be concerned, but they/we do not have the right to condemn the innocent majority because of the abuses committed by the minority.

We are in the Year of the Priest. I would suggest you read Pope Benedict’s Letter to Priests: vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/letters/2009/documents/hf_ben-xvi_let_20090616_anno-sacerdotale_en.html

I would suggest that we all pray for our priests. There are many formal prayers online, but we can always pray for them in our informal prayers. Your church may have prayer cards with a Prayer for Priests. Here is one prayer I found:

*A PRAYER FOR PRIESTS
Divine Saviour, Jesus Christ, Who have entrusted your work of redemption to the priests, Who take your place on earth, I offer You, through the hands of Your most holy Mother, for the sanctification of Your priests and future priests this whole day, all my prayers, works, joys, sacrifices and sufferings. Give us saintly priests. Grant to them apostolic hearts, filled with love for You and all the souls belonging to You, so that, being themselves sanctified in You, they may sanctify us who are entrusted to their care and bring us safely into Heaven.
Loving Jesus, bless all their priestly work and sacrifice. Bless all their prayers and words at the altar and in the confessional, in the pulpit, in the school and at the sickbed. Call many young men to the priesthood and the monastic life. Protect and sanctify all who will become Your priests. And grant to the souls of the priests who have departed this life, eternal rest.
And do you, Mary, Mother of all priests, take them under your special protection and lead them ever to the highest priestly sanctity. *
catholic.org/prayers/prayer.php?p=2677

I hope this helps a little.

I will continue to keep all who are coming into the Church this Easter Vigil in my prayers.

God bless,
Linda

 

[McUait]

Thank you all very much for your comments. This really helps my concerns and helps put the issue into perspective.

 

[ready]

The fact is that this type of child abuse is much more prevalent in the secular world than it is in the Church. It is a problem everywhere, but especially in the secular world. What makes it so bad in the Church is that we expect more from our priests who we expect to be trustworthy and holy. But parents and other leaders in society are supposed to be both too, and they are the majority of the perpetrators.