Need some advice

  • Thread starter Thread starter Podo2005
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
P

Podo2005

Guest
God’s blessing to you all

I find myself in a little bit of a struggle recently and I could use the prayers. You see I’m torn between two vocations… one being the married life & starting a family and the other being a vocation to the priesthood. On the one hand I’m drawn to really spreading the gospel & to intellectual endeavours like philosophy, theology (as well as mathematics & science)… but on the other hand I have this strong desire to commit my life to one woman and rise a family… anyone else struggle with this? I would appreciate some imput… am I selfish for desiring marriage & a family?

Your brother in Christ,
Zachary
 
Of course the first thing to do is to pray about it 🙂

The second thing to do is to consider making a a good Catholic retreat with the goal of discerning your vocation.
 
Speak to your spiritual director. There are many good Catholic married theologians. Check them out on EWTN.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
What others said. I just wanted give my opinion on this question:
Podo2005 said:
am I selfish for desiring marriage & a family?
Click to expand...
While both the celibate priesthood and marriage can be desired for selfish reasons (a spiritual director can help you figure this out), generally a desire for marriage and family is normal. Almost all men with a healthy psyche and sexuality should, to some extant or another, have a natural desire for these things. That’s why celibacy is a sacrifice.

🙂
 
Podo2005 said:
…am I selfish for desiring marriage & a family?
Click to expand...
Either way you will be evangelizing and leading people towards God, its just a matter of what capacity in which you will do that: biological family or parish family.🙂
 
St_Francis said:
Of course the first thing to do is to pray about it 🙂

The second thing to do is to consider making a a good Catholic retreat with the goal of discerning your vocation.
Click to expand...
Will do! Keep me in your prayers also:)
 
Podo2005 said:
I’ve prayed about that also… the thought of becoming a deacon has given me great joy (one of my favourite saints was a deacon…St Francis)…

Pray for me 🙂
Click to expand...
Our Holy Father Francis was a ordained a deacon, but it was very different from what we see in our parishes today. But I’m glad that he is one of your favorite saints.

Our Holy Father was a lay brother from 1209 to 1223. In 1223 Pope Honorius ordained him a deacon so that he could preach without being called a heretic. However, our Father never performed any of the other functions of a deacon. The rule is very careful to protect the brotherhood among the friars.

For example, you can’t take time out of community life to do some parish work. That’s a big NO NO. You can use your state as a cleric to throw your weight around the community. That’s another big NO NO. You obey the superior, whether he is a cleric or a lay man. LIke this, there were many regulations to preserve the charism of the Order.

So Francis was not the typical deacon. The only ministry that he exercised was reading the Gospel and preaching at mass. In fact, the early brothers never worked in parishes. This came later as a result of missionary endeavors to places where there were no parishes.

It’s interesting, because we always refer to him as Father, but not because he was a deacon, but because he is the spiritual father of our religious family. He was an awesome man. 👍

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
Podo2005 said:
am I selfish for desiring marriage & a family?
Click to expand...
Not at all! What you are is a normal catholic man. The priesthood is a sacrifice and part of that sacrifice is acknowledging that you will never be married or have biological children. It’s part of the nature of the vocation and I know many priests (at least the ones I talk to) desire to have families but realize that their calling is God’s will and are willing to put that desire aside for his Kingdom. But no priest is without progeny! You will beget spiritual children in the vocations you inspire, faith you encourage and example you set. People look up to priests and their faiths are emboldened by how he exemplifies the nature of Christ. If there is a holy presbyterate there will be a holy people. Just remember that marriage is a sacrifice as well. Maybe it seems like the easy route or the route to have everything; but in marriage you must die to self as well. The trick is not deciding what you want to do but rather discerning the vocation God has instilled in you from birth and acting upon it, taking up both the cross and the joys of your calling.

I’ll be praying for you!
Gabriel
 
JesuitLoyola said:
Not at all! What you are is a normal catholic man. The priesthood is a sacrifice and part of that sacrifice is acknowledging that you will never be married or have biological children. It’s part of the nature of the vocation and I know many priests (at least the ones I talk to) desire to have families but realize that their calling is God’s will and are willing to put that desire aside for his Kingdom. But no priest is without progeny! You will beget spiritual children in the vocations you inspire, faith you encourage and example you set. People look up to priests and their faiths are emboldened by how he exemplifies the nature of Christ. If there is a holy presbyterate there will be a holy people. Just remember that marriage is a sacrifice as well. Maybe it seems like the easy route or the route to have everything; but in marriage you must die to self as well. The trick is not deciding what you want to do but rather discerning the vocation God has instilled in you from birth and acting upon it, taking up both the cross and the joys of your calling.

I’ll be praying for you!
Gabriel
Click to expand...
Very well stated. 👍

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
Thank you Brother 🙂 It’s the product of years of my own vocational discernment worries combined with the wisdom of others!
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top