Need Some Help With This Sin/Confession Situation

[SAINThoodSEEKER]

Here’s one:

I almost gave someone a piece of my mind for reckless driving in a parking lot. This person didn’t get out of their vehicle, I went into the store. I’m not sure whether or not I would have actually confronted the person. I know that I wouldn’t have threatened them or even used fowl language.

Anyway, I wanted to mention this in confession but forgot until after I professed being “sorry for these sins and all those of my life” (while the priest was doing his thing).

Was this a sin to begin with? If so, am I absolved being that I forgot until after professing my all-encompasing sorrow and given the fact that I generally confessed being (name removed by moderator)atient with others recently and acting out on this?

 

[jmcrae]

There are times when it is not a sin to be angry - if someone is endangering your life, you have the right to be angry, and to express yourself in order to communicate with the other person that what they did was dangerous.

It seems like that’s what happened here, or what would have happened, if you had had the opportunity to complete the action.

I don’t think you have anything to worry about, but if it is bothering you, mention it at your next Confession.

 

[Booter]

Lets get this straight. Somebody acts like a moron in a parking lot driving recklessly. This makes you angry (justifiably so) and you think about saying something in sed anger but you don’t. What did you do wrong exactly?

 

[GentleKnight60]

Yes thoughts can be sins. I’ve been in situations like yours and have reacted in the same way. Your actions and thinking is controled by your thoughts. I’ve had some negative thoughts that I’ve carried around for years. What a burden and what a waste of time. I’m sure you would not like it if I was thinking some sexual thoughts about female members of your family etc. even though I may never act openly or take the initiative to do so. Don’t you think it would be a sin if my thoughts were about killing someone? You have to fight the negativity and evils of this world with God’s love. Maybe that person who offended you just made a mistake? Haven’t you made your own mistakes? Maybe that other person was peroccupied with their own thoughts, maybe a girlfriend or boyfriend who jilted them, a close friend who died, the loss of a job etc. Don’t we all get caught up in our own world and forget to be alert at times? What if that other person was a Nun or Priest or just a pious member of your church? Woud you still have those same negative thoughts? Learn to trust your guilt feelings. That’s the Holy Spirit within you telling you have done something wrong or something that offended Him. And so you forgot to mention that incident to your Priest. Go to confession again and get rid of whatever is troubling you. The Priest won’t mind and neither will God!

 

[SAINThoodSEEKER]

Lets get this straight. Somebody acts like a moron in a parking lot driving recklessly. This makes you angry (justifiably so) and you think about saying something in sed anger but you don’t. What did you do wrong exactly?

OK, I see your point, but it’s not that simple. My original concern was that I didn’t say anything only because this person didn’t get out of their car. I can’t be certain that I would’ve said anything if they had gotten out, but I sure thought about it. I realize, upon further reflection, that I’m being too scrupulous. Thanks for the thought.

 

[Booter]

Yes thoughts can be sins. I’ve been in situations like yours and have reacted in the same way. Your actions and thinking is controled by your thoughts. I’ve had some negative thoughts that I’ve carried around for years. What a burden and what a waste of time. I’m sure you would not like it if I was thinking some sexual thoughts about female members of your family etc. even though I may never act openly or take the initiative to do so. Don’t you think it would be a sin if my thoughts were about killing someone? You have to fight the negativity and evils of this world with God’s love. Maybe that person who offended you just made a mistake? Haven’t you made your own mistakes? Maybe that other person was peroccupied with their own thoughts, maybe a girlfriend or boyfriend who jilted them, a close friend who died, the loss of a job etc. Don’t we all get caught up in our own world and forget to be alert at times? What if that other person was a Nun or Priest or just a pious member of your church? Woud you still have those same negative thoughts? Learn to trust your guilt feelings. That’s the Holy Spirit within you telling you have done something wrong or something that offended Him. And so you forgot to mention that incident to your Priest. Go to confession again and get rid of whatever is troubling you. The Priest won’t mind and neither will God!

This is all true from what I read but I was address th op’s specific situation. If it was clear that someone was driving recklessly in a parking lot, it’s not a sin to be angry with that person because they can be endangering others. I’m not saying you should cuss that person out or anything, but it is certainly not committing a sin to want to holler at that person cause they deserve it. I would say listen to your conscience either way and pray for the reckless driver that they don’t hurt someone. Reception of the Eucharist removes all venial sin anyway (which I don’t even think applies here) so I don’t think there’s a need to run back to the confessional immediately. All that being said, I don’t think any of us should rely on spiritual advice solely from anonymous internet forums. I put in my two cents though. Happy 4th!

 

[GwenL]

A momentary flash of anger at someone who is endangering life, limb, or property is justified and normal. From your account, you did not act on it.

I think, my opinion only, it would also be justified if you confronted the person, with charity and tact. Easier said than done, surely.

I think that this would become sinful if one actually confronted the person with hostility and anger, foul language, finger gestures, and the like. Might be venial if it were a spontaneous response; might be mortal if one planned out the response as one stormed into the store to confront them.

I think that it would become mortally sinful if one wished harm, or planned harm, to the reckless driver.

So, did you forgive them?

If you honestly forgot to mention a sin in confession, you are still absolved, but must confess the sin at the next opportunity. From what you described, I don’t think you committed a sin. Unless you stayed steamed at them, thought through the nasty words you were going to use, and wished that they would get run over by a dump truck.

 

[SAINThoodSEEKER]

A momentary flash of anger at someone who is endangering life, limb, or property is justified and normal. From your account, you did not act on it.

I think, my opinion only, it would also be justified if you confronted the person, with charity and tact. Easier said than done, surely.

I think that this would become sinful if one actually confronted the person with hostility and anger, foul language, finger gestures, and the like. Might be venial if it were a spontaneous response; might be mortal if one planned out the response as one stormed into the store to confront them.

I think that it would become mortally sinful if one wished harm, or planned harm, to the reckless driver.

So, did you forgive them?

If you honestly forgot to mention a sin in confession, you are still absolved, but must confess the sin at the next opportunity. From what you described, I don’t think you committed a sin. Unless you stayed steamed at them, thought through the nasty words you were going to use, and wished that they would get run over by a dump truck.

I totally agree. Just to avoid confusion, I forgot to mention the incident until he was actually in the process of absolving me (or about to, such as when he was providing wisdom). In the past, I’ve mentioned things that I’ve forgotten during that particular confession while on my way out or at least toward the end of the whole thing and I’ve usually gotten the vibe from the priest (not this particular one) that I need to just let the sacrament do it’s thing and trust in it. Also, I did mention my recent general (name removed by moderator)atience with others as this has been a more widespread problem for me, this particular incident (if even sinful at all) should fall under that umbrella the general problem that was recalled and confessed. All things considered, I believe the grocery store incident was: 1) covered by my mentioning of the recent general outward expressions of (name removed by moderator)atience, etc. 2) covered by the fact that I only recalled it after being sorry for “…these sins and all of my life…” or 3) not a sin to begin with.

 

[prettiepet]

I, too am bothered by scruples. If we are to put on the Mind of Christ, would His Mind entertain such thoughts? We cannot help what pops into our head but we can choose to dismiss it quickly! Hopes this helps!