Battle_Warrior, I can
definitely understand where you’re coming from. I think in situations like this when we are confronted with habitual sins the
greatest danger is despair. We must always be on guard against this because to despair of the Lord’s forgiveness is likely (I want to say always) a worse sin than the one which is causing us to despair. I don’t know if you’re familiar with Saint Faustina and the encounters she had with Christ, but He often told her how a soul’s lack of trust in Him hurt Him the most. That many believed in God’s Justice and Holiness, but not in His Goodness and Mercy.
With that said, I recall someone once saying that a priest told them during Confession (I’m not sure if it was on here or elsewhere) that as much as habitual sins are bad it is better than if we were confessing new sins each week. If we were always confessing new sins that would probably mean we weren’t all that concerned with our spiritual life and behavior and were rebelling in various ways against God. However, if we are fighting the good fight in most areas of our lives and happen to be struggling with one or two areas of weakness this is much more manageable. This is not meant to excuse sinning in any way, or to suggest we can stop resisting sin. That would be foolishness, or madness, or both.
I wish I could give you a clear cut answer on how to free yourself from your habitual sins, but there’s no “silver bullet” that I know of. It’s a long process of falling and getting back up. Just keep trying and little by little you will make progress if you trust in the Lord and seek His help. It may seem to you as if you’re running in circles, but I assure you that if you’re really trying then you are making progress even if it’s imperceptible.
Lastly (since I’ve already rambled far too much
) some simple advice that you probably already know:
- Avoid occassions to sin. (i.e. if being in a particular place, around a particular person, etc. helps to cause you to sin avoid it as much as possible.)
- If you don’t already, pray the rosary. Try to pray it every day, but if this is too much for you right now then at least try to pray a decade of the rosary each day and gradually move up from there.
- Don’t hop from one confessor to another. I know this is hard sometimes due to embarassment and fears that the priest remembers you from last week, etc. But if you (at least most of the time) stick with the same confessor he can be of greater help to you due to his familiarity with your spiritual state.
Ok, shutting up now.
