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theBelgianDuke
Guest
Would it be a sin to have a shot (or two) before going to confession just to calm your nerves? (Walking there, of course, not driving.)
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Wesrock
Guest
I like whisky. I pour myself a dram a couple evenings a week. Not sure it’s prudent to drink in this way, though. Something about the way you framed it and going makes it seem a poor idea to me.
I don’t think it’s sinful, though.
I don’t think it’s sinful, though.
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Crusaderbear
Guest
Try just half a shot…
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joeybaggz
Guest
Don’t think it is sinful, unless of course you drink to give you an excuse for not confessing serious sin and giving yourself an excuse for a bad confession. Doubt that is what you are referring to, though.
And what can you do that makes you so nervous about confession that you need to drink to get through it?
Then again, on the other hand, forget I asked.
Shalom
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Hoosier_Daddy
Guest
I’m gonna go with a couple of red flags here.
1). If you are too intocicated. To drive, you probably have lost full control of your will. Too intoxicated to drive probably means too intoxicayed to confess. When dealing with spiritual and sacramental matters it’s imperative that you have full control of your own will.
2. It’s possible that if the priest smells alcohol on you or detects slurred or even rambling speech that they could stop the confession.
3. This could be an unhealthy crutch to self medicate a problem like this. It could be a sign of a much larger problem.
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reggieM
Guest
It’s not a sin but it doesn’t seem appropriate. I can fully understand if you have some bigger sins. I have had the same problem many times, so I’m not judging here.
But it’s good to remember that you’re meeting Jesus. It’s not a man, the priest. It’s Jesus Himself — and we should not be afraid of Him in that way. He is the perfection of meekness, gentleness and kindness. Now the priest, as a man, may not reflect this - so I understand also. There are certain priests where I’d need more than a couple of shots to face, even when I’m doing fairly well at confession time.
But when going to a sacrament, Eucharist or Confession, I think it’s best to do it without a painkiller or relaxant. For one thing, as you become more sensitive to grace - you’ll actually be able to sense a spiritual effect of Confession. There’s a lightness or a joy in receiving absolution. It’s not just me - many people have experienced this. It’s really part of the grace of the sacrament - our sins are totally taken away! I think the alcohol will blunt this part of it - dull your awareness.
So, the reality is - the sacrament itself will calm your nerves. You just have to let it sink in. And yes, it means you don’t get that calmness until after you receive absolution, but just pretend you had to wait a bit for that shot or two.
In any case, it’s great that you’re going to confession. The more regularly you go, the less your nerves will bother you. You’ll cut down on sins - it may be slow, little by little, but it absolutely will happen.
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robertmidwest
Guest
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Hoosier_Daddy
Guest
It’s probably not a good idea to declare something “not a sin”. Unless you are so sure you would be willing to accept responsibility if it is a sin in grind if God… we can debate grave matter, venial, etc. but it’s definitely not “Holy”. And I doubt it’s even neutral.It’s not a sin but it doesn’t seem appropriate. I can fully understand if you have some bigger sins. I have had the same problem many times, so I’m not judging here.
But it’s good to remember that you’re meeting Jesus. It’s not a man, the priest. It’s Jesus Himself — and we should not be afraid of Him in that way. He is the perfection of meekness, gentleness and kindness. Now the priest, as a man, may not reflect this - so I understand also. There are certain priests where I’d need more than a couple of shots to face, even when I’m doing fairly well at confession time.
But when going to a sacrament, Eucharist or Confession, I think it’s best to do it without a painkiller or relaxant. For one thing, as you become more sensitive to grace - you’ll actually be able to sense a spiritual effect of Confession. There’s a lightness or a joy in receiving absolution. It’s not just me - many people have experienced this. It’s really part of the grace of the sacrament - our sins are totally taken away! I think the alcohol will blunt this part of it - dull your awareness.
So, the reality is - the sacrament itself will calm your nerves. You just have to let it sink in. And yes, it means you don’t get that calmness until after you receive absolution, but just pretend you had to wait a bit for that shot or two.
In any case, it’s great that you’re going to confession. The more regularly you go, the less your nerves will bother you. You’ll cut down on sins - it may be slow, little by little, but it absolutely will happen.
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Hoosier_Daddy
Guest
Flirting with sin… yes, that’s a good description.
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puzzledtoo
Guest
Flirting with addiction as well. Taking a shot(or two) for one thing to calm the nerves could very well lead to taking a shot or two to calm the nerves for more and more things. I write from experience, but its only my 2 cents. Be well.
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reggieM
Guest
Objectively speaking, drinking two shots of alcohol is not a sin. It’s not grave matter.
I gave a number of qualifications.
Drinking alcohol is a good action. It’s actually a very Holy action.
Think about it.
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reggieM
Guest
I disagree, as I take another sip of coffee.
The Holy Scriptures advise us to drink wine and be merry.
St. Paul advises us to “use a little wine for the sake of your stomach and your frequent ailments”.
Recognizing the many warnings and condemnations against drunkeness - but we should not go to extremes.
Drinking alcohol in moderation is a good thing. God gave it to us.
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reggieM
Guest
Just to clarify - fully I agree with all of those warnings.
Keeping in mind, you’re talking about intoxication and/or driving impaired.
I didn’t get the sense that the OP was talking about that level of drinking though.
Tis_Bearself
Patron
I have had anxiety problems my entire adult life, and some of them revolved around confession. Due to a couple of upsetting confession experiences as a child (I would stress that these were related to emotional issues and conflicts within my family and did NOT involve the priest doing anything untoward in the confessional, just to be clear), I often found confession very scary and stressful, have had many experiences of breaking down in tears in there even when confessing only minor sins, and cannot go face-to-face without an anxiety attack. Because of this I used to put off going for as long as possible, barely made the minimum once a year confession (some years I probably missed it) and finally stopped going entirely for about 20 years. I am “back” now and have been going regularly for over a year but it is not an easy thing.
I fully can sympathize with you wanting a shot of whiskey before you go in. If it is absolutely necessary - in other words you don’t feel you can do it without - and the 2 shots will not harm your health (you’re not driving, you’re not an alcoholic, and you can handle 2 shots normally) then I’d say it’s not a sin and it’s better to have the 2 shots and go to confession than skip it entirely, as putting it off will just make it harder to go next time.
However, you should be working towards not needing a drink to go to Confession, if for no other reason than some time you might need to go and there is no alcohol available. So this should be a one-time only deal and not something you do each time.
I find that going on a regular basis helps me to cope better. Like I said it is not easy and I still have anxiety or an emotional reaction fairly frequently, but the more one “practices”, the easier it gets, a little step at a time, because you get used to going. Good luck and God bless you.
I fully can sympathize with you wanting a shot of whiskey before you go in. If it is absolutely necessary - in other words you don’t feel you can do it without - and the 2 shots will not harm your health (you’re not driving, you’re not an alcoholic, and you can handle 2 shots normally) then I’d say it’s not a sin and it’s better to have the 2 shots and go to confession than skip it entirely, as putting it off will just make it harder to go next time.
However, you should be working towards not needing a drink to go to Confession, if for no other reason than some time you might need to go and there is no alcohol available. So this should be a one-time only deal and not something you do each time.
I find that going on a regular basis helps me to cope better. Like I said it is not easy and I still have anxiety or an emotional reaction fairly frequently, but the more one “practices”, the easier it gets, a little step at a time, because you get used to going. Good luck and God bless you.
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Hoosier_Daddy
Guest
The op, specifically stated they would walk not drive of course.
I would hope the reactions would be different of the OP said, " I need two shots to have the courage to get through an intersection by my house, is that o
But sadly as defensive as drinkers get. The reaction would probably be the same…
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Hoosier_Daddy
Guest
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theBelgianDuke
Guest
I think it might be worth mentioning to you all that I have not done this nor was I planning on doing it. The thought merely crossed my mind, and I wondered about its ethical implications. So, I figured I’d ask.
I say this because it seems like a lot of you think I may be skirting close to the edge of alcoholism. So, to be clear, I do not maintain a habit of drinking before going to confession.
I say this because it seems like a lot of you think I may be skirting close to the edge of alcoholism. So, to be clear, I do not maintain a habit of drinking before going to confession.
Tis_Bearself
Patron
Well actually, now that you mentioned it, it seems like a good idea and maybe I should have thought of it before I went back for my first Confession in 20 years last year
However, I had to drive to the Cathedral, and the confession time was at like 6:30 or 7 am, so even if I had thought of it, it probably would not have been feasible under those circumstances.
However, I had to drive to the Cathedral, and the confession time was at like 6:30 or 7 am, so even if I had thought of it, it probably would not have been feasible under those circumstances.
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