New Catholic, learning to relate to other Catholics

[RedBasket]

I wasnt sure where to put this, and its 2 parts, but its to do with me not completely understand how things always work.

First thing…I volunteered to be a fill in for Lector, but I never get called. I see the same people, many times. Sometimes the same person does both readings. Im sad, bc I would like to take a turn. Then I think, maybe because Im new, people in charge want to make sure I stay Catholic, because how bad would it be if I started being a Lector, then fell to sin.

Second thing, and this is kind of touchy…I applied for a job with a lady at church who owns a certain business, and I have a ton of experience. I went to get the application, and the girl told me she wasnt allowed to give me one?? Weird. So I mentioned this all to my godmother, and she said how odd. So I went back to the restaurant, and they gave me one this time, but she hired a foreign worker. Im hurt by this, and I fight with myself against resentment. She knows another lady I worked for, and no longer do, because this second lady was very abusive (she threw silverware at me in the kitchen, yelled, etc). I think first lady wouldnt hire because of second lady. Im just worried rumors have started, and get passed around, but I havent done anything. Sorry…can you tell this is a small town? Le sigh. The lady that is Catholic REALLY makes me angry because shes well-known in town for her good works. Another sigh. General thoughts please? Be gentle.

 

[JM3]

The first gift of the Holy Spirit is wisdom.

“And wisdom is precisely this: it is the grace of being able to see everything with the eyes of God. It is simply this: it is to see the world, to see situations, circumstances, problems, everything through God’s eyes. This is wisdom. Sometimes we see things according to our liking or according to the condition of our heart, with love or with hate, with envy… No, this is not God’s perspective. Wisdom is what the Holy Spirit works in us so as to enable us to see things with the eyes of God. This is the gift of wisdom.”

 

[St_Francis]

Well, first, in volunteer situations I have experienced, you always have to start at the bottom. So, volunteer for tasks no one wants to do, like cleaning up. (The advantage to volunteering to clean up is that you may be given the leftover food ) Lectors are usually invited to the position, at least in my church, rather than volunteering.

The second situation may be one of those where you do not have enough information. Perhaps the person hired had more experience than you, or less experience was needed so they could pay him less, or the person who made the decision knew that person’s situation and so knew that person had more need of a job, or… I would pray for the grace to let that go.

 

[Casilda]

I wasnt sure where to put this, and its 2 parts, but its to do with me not completely understand how things always work.

First thing…I volunteered to be a fill in for Lector, but I never get called. I see the same people, many times. Sometimes the same person does both readings. Im sad, bc I would like to take a turn. Then I think, maybe because Im new, people in charge want to make sure I stay Catholic, because how bad would it be if I started being a Lector, then fell to sin.

Sorry…can you tell this is a small town?

General thoughts please? Be gentle.

I can relate to small town parishes. Yes, you will find the same few people doing everything. It’s worse when the priest is older and everyone is set in their ways. I thought the parish here would improve when a new, younger priest arrived, but he allowed the same ministry leaders to continue. You will have to be there years and form a relationship with those people in order to be allowed in. Go to the ministry meetings, find out who’s who and how they do things. They may notice you and ask you to help, eventually. I have been here a year, started by attending a retreat and have gotten to know the people by attending a weekly Bible study of sorts.

 

[Rosebud77]

I can relate to small town parishes. Yes, you will find the same few people doing everything. It’s worse when the priest is older and everyone is set in their ways. I thought the parish here would improve when a new, younger priest arrived, but he allowed the same ministry leaders to continue. You will have to be there years and form a relationship with those people in order to be allowed in. Go to the ministry meetings, find out who’s who and how they do things. They may notice you and ask you to help, eventually. I have been here a year, started by attending a retreat and have gotten to know the people by attending a weekly Bible study of sorts.

Excellent post. All my young years I longed to do the flowers for Harvest Festival l etc, but all the jobs were taken by the same ladies every year.

It is all a good lesson in respect and yes, humility…

I finally got my ambition when I moved to a small island with a tiny church membership and these ways were new to them I even got to make a Harvest Loaf that went rounds all the islands.

Just let them get used to you gently and , love them… and serve wherever and however you can.

 

[RedBasket]

Thanks guys. I dont think Im being taught humility, and I do have respect. More likely Im being taught patience. One thing I keep coming back to is, when God wants someone for something, all the politics in the world (or my will, lol) won’t matter. Tons of people are nice to me, so I just think how kind THEY have been. I also call to mind all the headaches Paul had to deal with-backstabbing, gossip, etc. I have several gifts, so I’ll see where He leads with those

Thanks, and I’ll keep reading. I love this website

 

[Rosebud77]

Thanks guys. I dont think Im being taught humility, and I do have respect. More likely Im being taught patience. One thing I keep coming back to is, when God wants someone for something, all the politics in the world (or my will, lol) won’t matter. Tons of people are nice to me, so I just think how kind THEY have been. I also call to mind all the headaches Paul had to deal with-backstabbing, gossip, etc. I have several gifts, so I’ll see where He leads with those

Thanks, and I’ll keep reading. I love this website

Humility (as opposed to humiliation) and respect are twins. each means setting your own ideas aside so that others can fulfil theirs.

And both take patience but all three are great virtues.

 

[St_Francis]

Thanks guys. I dont think Im being taught humility, and I do have respect. More likely Im being taught patience. One thing I keep coming back to is, when God wants someone for something, all the politics in the world (or my will, lol) won’t matter. Tons of people are nice to me, so I just think how kind THEY have been. I also call to mind all the headaches Paul had to deal with-backstabbing, gossip, etc. I have several gifts, so I’ll see where He leads with those

Thanks, and I’ll keep reading. I love this website

That’s the spirit! I am happy for you

 

[Liturgy_Geek_1]

Perhaps there are volunteering opportunities that would give your fellow parishioners an opportunity to get to know you such as coffee & donuts, funeral dinners. You might also want to check out prayer chains, Bible study groups or other social outlets that your parish might have.

Once people become better acquainted with you, things could very well improve. We might be Catholic but we are still people and need to get to know new folks. I hope this helps. God bless.