NFP after pregnancy

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KiernanAbell

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So I suppose I’m looking for a bit of encouragement. I’m 4 months postpartum with my first baby. I’m not ovulating yet, and getting quite fed up with not being able to renew my marriage vows.
I don’t know who to ask, but all the signs say that I’m still infertile. Does anyone know if I’m completely safe from getting pregnant again if it’s the case?

And I’m I’m infertile anyway, I suppose it wouldn’t be licit to use a condom, would it?

I know that many, many people (including married couples) go without sex for a long time. But I am desperate to feel alive again after a horrific few months. (The birth was far worse than average, and I took a long time to recover).

Thank you and God bless.
 
I’d go back to your trainer. She can review your charts with you and do a refresher on the post-partum way to practice the method you have selected. If you are no longer in touch with your trainer, find a new one (many will do a session over Skype).

Use of a condom, unless it is the sort of perforated condom used to collect a semen sample, in the marriage act is sinful regardless of your fertility status.
 
And i forgot to say, congrats!!!

Be sure to do other things that can help you feel human again, massage, long bubble bath, maybe going for a salon treatment, put on some music and dance.
 
Thank you TheLittleLady.

I have been back to my NFP tutor, and am about to undergo tests for hormones, thyroid etc. as my temps are all over the place. She is being supportive, but I still need to ovulate to know what’s going on. She doesn’t have an answer for “when will my fertility return?”.

This has been the most challenging part of using NFP and it feels like the church/God is asking too much. I’ve been open to life, brought a child into this world, am making all the usual sacrifices a parent does, and all I’d like is five minutes with my husband again.

Sorry, this is clearly more about my self-pity than anything much else. 🤣 I’ll get over myself one day!
 
We ALL need a place to vent!

Maybe you could try an ovulation monitor like used with Marquette?

(And I hate that phrase “open to life” because it really does create confusion and hurt. The Church uses the more precise phrase “ordered toward procreation”)
 
I’ll have a look at Marquette again. I vaguely remember those monitors were very expensive. Might be worth it!

Haven’t heard the phrase “ordered toward procreation” before. “Open to life” is confusing though, and I always interpret it to really imply “not closed off from life”.
 
KiernanAbell said:
She is being supportive, but I still need to ovulate to know what’s going on. She doesn’t have an answer for “when will my fertility return?”.

This has been the most challenging part of using NFP and it feels like the church/God is asking too much. I’ve been open to life, brought a child into this world, am making all the usual sacrifices a parent does, and all I’d like is five minutes with my husband again.
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No one can tell you when your fertility will return.

I recommend looking into Marquette. The monitor is expensive, but there is a specific postpartum protocol and I have always liked the assurance of the monitor. Anyone who has had a baby and used NFP has dealt with this to some degree, so while I understand it is hard, you are not alone. (We went an entire year.)
 
A year?! Do you have any advice on how to cope please?

From hours and hours of reading NFP blogs, not one person mentioned abstaining for more than three weeks (and tbh normally the most prolific NFP proponents will say that you only have to abstain for one week a month 😂). I expected a few months of no action around the birth as being a new parent is exhausting. My husband and I have a brilliant friendship. There’s nothing natural about having to abstain from each other for a year when married. He isn’t even that bothered about the prospect, but this scenario has suddenly turned me desperate!

Thanks for the support. In the Catholic magazine I read, one letter from an older lady stated that she wished she didn’t practise NFP, as it contributed to the breakdown of her marriage. That has led to me feeling demoralised too. When folks say that NFP can bring spouses closer together, it’s not entirely true.
 
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We had a lot of trouble breastfeeding, so I stopped exclusively breastfeeding after one week, then combination fed for a further five weeks. It’s 12 weeks since I expressed a drop.
 
Everyone’s circumstances are different. My cycles returned fairly quickly, despite exclusively breastfeeding, but it was quite difficult for many months to evaluate mucus and temping does not work for me.

In addition, complications during our son’s birth made intercourse nearly impossible for a year anyway. So, there wasn’t really much of a choice. It was difficult, but not the end of the world. Honestly, we had a very difficult first year with our son and we were mostly exhausted. That’s the main reason we got through it without much difficulty.

NFP doesn’t always necessarily bring couples closer together. It’s not fun, and it takes self control and sacrifice. But, it’s a moral option when we have good reasons for avoiding pregnancy. There’s no way I would trust a condom more than knowing my own body’s patterns. The problem postpartum is that signs get really confusing, but that’s how it is. I am not familiar with other methods, but I think Marquette is a great way to stay ahead of what is going on.
 
I would keep in mind that NFP is to do what we can, according to our natural cycle of fertility, to conceive or avoid conception. If you desperately do not want any risk of another pregnancy, then you should not be having sex.

The whole point of being open to life is believing that sex should involve our willingness to conceive when we have sex!
 
ovulation predictor cannot be use in post partum when the period are not return yet.
It cannot use for some mouths until the cycle become regular too.

And for some strange reasons, not advise bu the manufacturer clearblue while breastfeeding.
 
This sort of detail would best be covered by an instructor certified for Marquette.
 
Ok thanks you for the information.

But I was talking about the clear blue monitor. I have read the notice, it is written in it.
 
KiernanAbell,

For an eventual future baby, I will advise you to go to La Leche League. https://www.lllusa.org/

And begin to collect informations and read their best selling book before the birth.

You will be better armed for a future breastfeeding. And can have a contact in case you need it.

Another advantage for breastfeeding for NFP will be the possibility to follow LAM rules.
 
Marquette uses the Clearblue monitor.

The manufacturer specifies that it is not intended to be used as a method of birth control, presumably for liability purposes. It’s not marketed for that purpose, but is used for it with the Marquette method.
 
Ok Clementine14. So marquette use the clear blue fertility monitor design for helping couples to conceive?
(very strange!)

I was speaking of the persona Clearblue monitor, that unfortunately the manufacturer had stopped the commercialisation since July2016.

http://uk.clearblue.com/contraception/persona-monitor
In this notice, it is specify to not use during breastfeeding, and for cycles more than… or short than…
It is true that during breastfeeding, that period do not return immediately and the first cycles are often very very long. So cannot be used during this period.

But after?
 
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