NFP Couples.....How long

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Matt33

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How long is the longest that you have cycled and not concieved while trying to not concieve?
 
We’ve been trying to conceive for nine months while charting; I conceived once but miscarried.
 
I wish the answer were simple, but in our case it would kind of depend on your interpretation. The first time we used NFP to avoid, we did so for 2.5 years. After that time, I began to feel that maybe God was calling us to have another child. Although we were trying to avoid pregnancy, it happened, and after the initial shock we were quite happy with the result:). The truth is that I was having a real hard time trying to figure out if we were ready, and I wished I didn’t need to make the decision. Well, God made that decision for us. We’re using NFP to avoid again, and we’re going on three years strong.

The truth is that NFP isn’t easy, and I won’t lie to you about that part. But, I really doubt our marriage would be this strong if we would have taken another “route”. After years of charting, I feel more and more confident. Hopefully someday, we won’t need to TTA. Until then, we do the best we can and know that if a surprise happens, it truly is because God knows best.

If you don’t mind me asking, is there a reason why you’re curious? Are you new to NFP?
 
taye said:
I wish the answer were simple, but in our case it would kind of depend on your interpretation. The first time we used NFP to avoid, we did so for 2.5 years. After that time, I began to feel that maybe God was calling us to have another child. Although we were trying to avoid pregnancy, it happened, and after the initial shock we were quite happy with the result:). The truth is that I was having a real hard time trying to figure out if we were ready, and I wished I didn’t need to make the decision. Well, God made that decision for us. We’re using NFP to avoid again, and we’re going on three years strong.

The truth is that NFP isn’t easy, and I won’t lie to you about that part. But, I really doubt our marriage would be this strong if we would have taken another “route”. After years of charting, I feel more and more confident. Hopefully someday, we won’t need to TTA. Until then, we do the best we can and know that if a surprise happens, it truly is because God knows best.

If you don’t mind me asking, is there a reason why you’re curious? Are you new to NFP?
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We are not new to NFp but many people we know are struggling with the accuracy.

how many people feel they concieved when following the rules?
 
Any people out there who are using NFP for severe medical avoidance of pregnancy. And how many days are people abstaining out of the month on average?
 
We successfully avoided pregnancy for 4.5 years with NFP, then conceived our next child (intentionally) within 3 months.
 
As an unplanned child myself (I use it loosely), I don’t personally abstain rigidly as I don’t know what another child will bring to my life. I believe God planned me even if both my parents were not willing to accept a new life. However, sometimes we abstain for short periods to get over having a baby. I’m not really a great fan of NFP as I believe that every child is planned by God and do not look up to my parents’ efforts at family planning or not.

I will pray for you and every child is a blessing from God.
 
Matt33 said:
Any people out there who are using NFP for severe medical avoidance of pregnancy. And how many days are people abstaining out of the month on average?
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Days when abstaining due to TTA - 7 to 10 days, vaired month to month.

Docs told us I would die or end up in a wheelchair if we had another baby. I wish now that we had not tried so hard to avoid, I know we should have had other children, however, now I am too old 😦
 
Matt33 said:
How long is the longest that you have cycled and not concieved while trying to not concieve?
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We’ve never had a surprise. The oldest was 17 months when we TTC and conceived our second. Our second was 22 months when we TTC and conceived our thir. our third was 27 months when we TTC and conceived our fourth. 🙂
 
Wife and I had a baby boy last June, so it’s been a year so far. Before that, was about a year also. Our kids are 19 months apart. We are currently not trying to conceive.
 
We avoided before our first - for 1 1/2 years before TTC…
We avoided before our second - for another 1 1/2 years before TTC…
We avoided before our third - for 2 1/2 yeras before TTC…
All 3 were planned - and now we’re avoiding again for the *near *future… 11 months so far.

So ~ 6 1/2 years in total…
 
You know, I’m glad that your plans have come to fruition. But I wouldn’t set in my heart that I didn’t want a baby as sometimes it happens and then that baby is unwanted. There are always positives of having a baby although it may not be a first priority at the present moment in time.
 
budgie2 said:
You know, I’m glad that your plans have come to fruition. But I wouldn’t set in my heart that I didn’t want a baby as sometimes it happens and then that baby is unwanted. There are always positives of having a baby although it may not be a first priority at the present moment in time.
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Very true!.. Which is why NFP is so wonderful! It’s GOD who designed the fertility cycle of women! He *could *have created constant fertility, right? He didn’t HAVE to make the female fertility limited to just a few days per month - But He did. He’s GOD! He also gave us the mental capability to recognize signs and understand our fertility cycle… He gave us FREE WILL! But, of course, “good” use of NFP *REQUIRES *prayerful communication between the married couple. It’s not that we’re saying NO to God… it’s that we’re praying that God helps change those things that our lives that would make having another child challenging. :o

I would LOVE and ADORE another child - and if that’s God’s will for me, then He can make it happen! But things like tiny houses, mental health, working full time with 3 kids, finances, etc… require daily prayer. I know God would never give us more than we can handle, and I’m grateful that He’s designed women with this beautiful cyclical fertility that can be discerned prayerfully as to whether or not we decide to maritally embrace.
 
Married 10 years, never used anything but NFP to avoid conception.

Score:
Planned kids: 2
Unplanned kids: 0
Oh, What the heck kids: 1
Regrets: 0

Average NFP abstinance days per month: 9-10. Yeah, that’s hard. But it is supposed to be. It’s the fasting, the giving up of something good that keeps you from forgetting the link between sex and life and sand-blasts your ‘serious reason’ for avoiding to help you see if it is real or rationalizing (note ‘what the heck kids’ class above).

I think the people who have the most trouble with NFP are those with an undiagnosed underlying medical condition and those who used the pill for a while and try to switch (doctors rarely tell you just how long it can affect your cycle and symptoms since most of them just plain don’t KNOW).
 
manualman said:
Married 10 years, never used anything but NFP to avoid conception.

Score:
Planned kids: 2
Unplanned kids: 0
Oh, What the heck kids: 1
Regrets: 0

Average NFP abstinance days per month: 9-10. Yeah, that’s hard. But it is supposed to be. It’s the fasting, the giving up of something good that keeps you from forgetting the link between sex and life and sand-blasts your ‘serious reason’ for avoiding to help you see if it is real or rationalizing (note ‘what the heck kids’ class above).

I think the people who have the most trouble with NFP are those with an undiagnosed underlying medical condition and those who used the pill for a while and try to switch (doctors rarely tell you just how long it can affect your cycle and symptoms since most of them just plain don’t KNOW).
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Your post made me think about something. My wife and I are thinking of using NFP soon. Thing is, all the couples that I know how use NFP seem to have lots of kids after they try to avoid. It makes me think that NFP is really ineffective and not anything that we can use. Are most of the people who have “accidents” just throwing caution to the wind in the heat of the moment? Or is the difficulty in actually spotting the fertile and infertile times? I don’t really want to ask our instructors if they just can’t control themselves.
 
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