NFP question...

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My fiance and I want to use NFP once we get married… my question is, what is the best way to go about doing this? Are there any experts out there that can offer advice?
I keep track of my temps and cervical stuff once in a while (i don’t have a real reason right now to be adament about it). Personally, it’s hard to keep track of temps because i go to work early in the mornings, and go to bed late at night (i have evening school classes). Is there a way to do NFP without temps? I’ve heard of Billings, but I’m not sure how it works… and is it expensive?

Again, any insight would be appreciated =] I know alot about how everything works (am a nursing major) and have read and NFP book… so I know the basics of NFP…I’m just wondering the best way to go about it.

Thank you =]
 
Our diocese offered classes… so contact yours to see if they have local classes…

There are several methods of NFP… the sympto-thermal is the type that uses the temperature sign, but that temperature sign is SECONDARY to the cervical mucous and cervical position signs, those are PRIMARY. It is possible to get good temperature readings even if you go to bed late… it’s just important to take it at the same time every day. I’m up several times a night with a nursing baby and my temp sign is still good.
But despite that, there are many methods that don’t use the temperature sign… Billings, Creighton, Marquette, etc… google to see if any of those provide local classes…

Good luck and congratulations! We’ve found NFP to be a wonderful blessing in our marriage!
 
If you don’t find it convenient to use Sympto-Thermal (which uses basal body temp at waking) then look at the Billings, Creighton, and Marquette models.

The cost depends because most offer some kind of sliding scale.

Creighton has a distance learning option, but not a self-study option. You always have an instructor. It’s easy to learn and I like it b/c there’s no temp taking.

Go to the websites for these methods and research which one might be best for you. Contact your diocesan office of family life to see which method(s) are offered in your diocese/parish. But, if they don’t offer the one you are interested in, go directly to the websites and look for teachers, not all teachers are affiliated with the Catholic Church.
 
One more soul (omsoul.com) has a list of NFP teachers and medical personnel listed by state for a variety of methods. You might be able to find a certified instructor to talk you through this or give you an introductory class (even if you know the stuff well, it can be helpful to learn about their teaching style or about a method that you’re not as familiar with).

I think if you go to any Catholic Church and tell the priest or religious ed director there that you want to learn NFP but don’t think you can afford it, they would jump at the chance to help you out. I know I would definitely instruct someone who wanted to learn but was unable to pay. In any event, none of the methods are that expensive. You’ll need a BBT thermometer, and some charts. Instruction costs can very, but as I said, you might be able to get a reduced fee if you ask.

I started charting several months before my husband and I got married and now, six months after the wedding, I am so glad I have those early charts. For one, it’s easier to get solid CM readings without confusing it with semen. Also, I like being able to compare my charts. I often go back to look at when I ovulated seven months ago or how long my average luteal phase is. So I strongly recommend trying to chart NFP consistently, even just for a month, before marriage, because it gives you such a great starting point.

The book Taking Charge of Your Fertility was also very helpful to me while I was learning NFP. It does, unfortunately, preach condom use, but if you can ignore that it’ll be quite useful. I especially liked the colored pictures of cervical fluid included as a reference.

Good luck!
 
We go to a very small church, and they don’t offer much. In my fiance’s RCIA class, there are only two people attending! But I will look into it and ask about the possibility.

I heard that most NFP will cost about the same as birth control costs a month. Is that true? My friend pays $15 a month for birth control.

Thank you for the links, and the book suggestions… there is alot to choose from! I have been taking my tempretures for the past two months, but something always seems to mess it up! Like, one morning, I’ll accidently sleep through my alarm, or one night I go to bed at 5am because of an assigment… and also i was sick for a week in there too, so my charts didn’t seem to work. Plus, I’m also a little irregular, so it was hard to go off of sample charts because i wasn’t sure what was going on. =( But hopefully one of those sites will work.

Does anyone know, what is the best to do if I’m irregular? Or does it matter?

Thanks again =]
 
We go to a very small church, and they don’t offer much. In my fiance’s RCIA class, there are only two people attending! But I will look into it and ask about the possibility.

I heard that most NFP will cost about the same as birth control costs a month. Is that true? My friend pays $15 a month for birth control.

Thank you for the links, and the book suggestions… there is alot to choose from! I have been taking my tempretures for the past two months, but something always seems to mess it up! Like, one morning, I’ll accidently sleep through my alarm, or one night I go to bed at 5am because of an assigment… and also i was sick for a week in there too, so my charts didn’t seem to work. Plus, I’m also a little irregular, so it was hard to go off of sample charts because i wasn’t sure what was going on. =( But hopefully one of those sites will work.

Does anyone know, what is the best to do if I’m irregular? Or does it matter?

Thanks again =]
Just mark the disturbances on your chart. One or 2 temps that are a bit early or late shouldn’t make too much of a difference. Temps really just confirm when you are in phase 3, mucous and cervical position is better at anticipating fertility.

No one is 100% regular each month. What do you mean by irregular? I have really long cycles and I’m quite able to chart my fertility signs and now what’s going on most months.

The best method is the one you’ll follow if the need to space baby’s is needed. Remember that NFP is only for grave/serious/valid reasons and should be done prayerfully together with your spouse and a spiritual advisor if you are having trouble discerning…
 
I heard that most NFP will cost about the same as birth control costs a month. Is that true? My friend pays $15 a month for birth control.
The NFP class I took was $70 (for materials) when I took it 6-7 years ago, but the fee was waived for those who couldn’t afford it. We paid the $70, so I guess you could say that NFP, so far, has cost us $10 a year. 😃
Does anyone know, what is the best to do if I’m irregular? Or does it matter?
My non-breastfeeding cycles range from 28 to 36 days (the one nursing cycle that I had back in March of 2007 was over 50 days), and I have had no problem using the Sympto-Thermal method.

My cycles are not considered “irregular,” though… According to my NFP book, “irregular” is partially defined by having more than 14 days of variance between your shortest and longest cycles (The Art of Natural Family Planning, 4th edition, page 418).
 
I heard that most NFP will cost about the same as birth control costs a month. Is that true? My friend pays $15 a month for birth control.]
$15 a month for NFP is too high.

There are a few more upfront costs:
BBT thermometer - $10 max
TCOYF (if you decide to self teach) - $4 on ebay
NFP class (before discount) - maybe $100 ish? depending on your archdiocese. If you go through a medical personnel your insurance might cover it.

That’s it. Once you know how to do it, you really don’t need to buy anything again. I’m still using the same BBT thermometer a year and a half later (and I usually find them cheaper than $10) and I print my charts from online for free. I was self-taught. So, my year of NFP charting cost me on average $1 a month, and it’ll cost less money on average per month the longer I chart.

Even if your parish doesn’t offer NFP classes, it’s possible that a neighboring parish does, or that they can put you in contact with an NFP instructor. Try calling the Family Life Office of your archdiocese to see if they have any advice.
 
No one is 100% regular each month. What do you mean by irregular? I have really long cycles and I’m quite able to chart my fertility signs and now what’s going on most months.

The best method is the one you’ll follow if the need to space baby’s is needed. Remember that NFP is only for grave/serious/valid reasons and should be done prayerfully together with your spouse and a spiritual advisor if you are having trouble discerning…
By irregular I mean sometimes it comes up to like… ten days later than the last month, or sometimes, a few days early. Some months it is heavy, and some it is very light… i also get some random spotting here and there… i have a PAP smear appointment within the next few months to get everything looked over just in case…

what do you mean it is only for grave/serious/valid reasons? i thought it was a natural and holier way to space children, and to avoid pregnancy?
 
I was self-taught. So, my year of NFP charting cost me on average $1 a month, and it’ll cost less money on average per month the longer I chart.
Do you didn’t even go to a class? I feel that I understand how everything works for a couple reasons… i have read alot about it, and i am in nursing school, so we have gone over the reproductive sytem… (like how the woman’s body works) and things like that. i think it might be a waste of money to attend a class.

i do have a BBT thermometer already =] im not sure of a good chart though… do you have a link to the one you use?
 
The We paid the $70, so I guess you could say that NFP, so far, has cost us $10 a year. 😃
My non-breastfeeding cycles range from 28 to 36 days (the one nursing cycle that I had back in March of 2007 was over 50 days), and I have had no problem using the Sympto-Thermal method.

My cycles are not considered “irregular,” though… According to my NFP book, “irregular” is partially defined by having more than 14 days of variance between your shortest and longest cycles (The Art of Natural Family Planning, 4th edition, page 418).
$10 a year sounds like a good deal to me 😛

Oh… then maybe mine aren’t as irregular as i thought… mine usually have a ten-thirteen day difference… but sometimes is heavy, sometimes not.
 
You don’t sound all that irregular–sounds within the range of normal, but it’s best to get your docs opinion…

NFP is a licit form of spacing children. However, it is to be used for licit/grave/serious/just reason (depends on your translation). Check out the Catechism # 2366-2371

scborromeo.org/ccc/p3s2c2a6.htm
<<2366 Fecundity is a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful. A child does not come from outside as something added on to the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfillment. So the Church, which is "on the side of life,"151 teaches that "it is necessary that each and every marriage act remain ordered per se to the procreation of human life."152 "This particular doctrine, expounded on numerous occasions by the Magisterium, is based on the inseparable connection, established by God, which man on his own initiative may not break, between the unitive significance and the procreative significance which are both inherent to the marriage act."153

2367 Called to give life, spouses share in the creative power and fatherhood of God.154 "Married couples should regard it as their proper mission to transmit human life and to educate their children; they should realize that they are thereby cooperating with the love of God the Creator and are, in a certain sense, its interpreters. They will fulfill this duty with a sense of human and Christian responsibility."155

2368 A particular aspect of this responsibility concerns the regulation of procreation. For just reasons, spouses may wish to space the births of their children. It is their duty to make certain that their desire is not motivated by selfishness but is in conformity with the generosity appropriate to responsible parenthood. Moreover, they should conform their behavior to the objective criteria of morality:

When it is a question of harmonizing married love with the responsible transmission of life, the morality of the behavior does not depend on sincere intention and evaluation of motives alone; but it must be determined by objective criteria, criteria drawn from the nature of the person and his acts criteria that respect the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love; this is possible only if the virtue of married chastity is practiced with sincerity of heart.156
2369 "By safeguarding both these essential aspects, the unitive and the procreative, the conjugal act preserves in its fullness the sense of true mutual love and its orientation toward man’s exalted vocation to parenthood."157

2370 Periodic continence, that is, the methods of birth regulation based on self-observation and the use of infertile periods, is in conformity with the objective criteria of morality.158 These methods respect the bodies of the spouses, encourage tenderness between them, and favor the education of an authentic freedom. In contrast, “every action which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible” is intrinsically evil:159

Thus the innate language that expresses the total reciprocal self-giving of husband and wife is overlaid, through contraception, by an objectively contradictory language, namely, that of not giving oneself totally to the other. This leads not only to a positive refusal to be open to life but also to a falsification of the inner truth of conjugal love, which is called upon to give itself in personal totality. . . . The difference, both anthropological and moral, between contraception and recourse to the rhythm of the cycle . . . involves in the final analysis two irreconcilable concepts of the human person and of human sexuality.160
2371 "Let all be convinced that human life and the duty of transmitting it are not limited by the horizons of this life only: their true evaluation and full significance can be understood only in reference to man’s eternal destiny."161 >>

actually that whole chapter would be a good info for you about marriage.

This is good too: scborromeo.org/ccc/p2s2c3a7.htm

NFP is not the default of marriage, being open to children is, unless there is a serious/just/grave/valid reason to be avoiding.
 
Do you didn’t even go to a class? I feel that I understand how everything works for a couple reasons… i have read alot about it, and i am in nursing school, so we have gone over the reproductive sytem… (like how the woman’s body works) and things like that. i think it might be a waste of money to attend a class.

i do have a BBT thermometer already =] im not sure of a good chart though… do you have a link to the one you use?
Going to a class is definitely not a waste of money! I highly recommend personal instruction for everyone. It really helps to be able to talk over the details of charting with an experienced instructor. Remember that an instructor has looked at hundreds of charts over the years. Having that experience on your side can really help clarify things, especially in the first months of charting where

I learned the Billings Method, and I remember the fees being very reasonable. $30-something for the first class and follow-up appointments. Of course there are stickers and charts, which you can reorder from the Billings USA website, but I found a free printable Billings chart online, and I use the written symbols instead of stickers now. The Drs. Billings designed the method to be easy to use even for women in third-world countries, so they really did keep things simple.
 
Jennifer, thank you for the chart link and for the information from the catechism. =]

Christina, I was thinking about the Billings method… they offer online classes so I’ll look into their pricing. =] my thing with going to classes is that i never have ANY extra time. i work during the day, and I go to school in the evening… the entire sunday is for church (mass and RCIA for my man) so i would have a difficult time attending a class.
 
Do you didn’t even go to a class? I feel that I understand how everything works for a couple reasons… i have read alot about it, and i am in nursing school, so we have gone over the reproductive sytem… (like how the woman’s body works) and things like that. i think it might be a waste of money to attend a class.

i do have a BBT thermometer already =] im not sure of a good chart though… do you have a link to the one you use?
I recommend taking the class too. We haven’t gotten around to it, but haveing been using it to prevent pregnancy. I just really like charting, knowing when i’m about to ovulate, knowing when I’m about to get my period. (Even if your cycles are very irregular, as mine are, the luteal phase is almost always regular for a given woman, so you can predict when you’ll start menses).

These are the fertility charts I use: gardenoffertility.com/fertilitycharts.shtml
 
I recommend taking the class too. We haven’t gotten around to it, but haveing been using it to prevent pregnancy.
Sorry, I meant we haven’t been using it to prevent pregnancy. We are charting, just not for birth control.
 
Thank you, that is a really nice fertility chart. my waking temp is ALWAYS so low though, i can never find a chart that has my numbers on it. It’s usually in the 96s… sigh

So what really is the difference of NFP and birth control? Besides the fact that NFP is natural… doesn’t it have the same effect? Postponing pregnancy? Or is it different because while doing NFP, you’re still open to children?
 
So what really is the difference of NFP and birth control? Besides the fact that NFP is natural… doesn’t it have the same effect? Postponing pregnancy? Or is it different because while doing NFP, you’re still open to children?
Birth control is the spacing/planning of children. The Church doesn’t teach it is intrinsically immoral to space/plan/avoid children. It can be immoral if one does not have a just reason.

There are two ways to space/plan children:

Contraception-- always a moral evil because each act of intercourse must be objectively unitive and procreative (unaltered). Contraception profanes the sexual act.

Abstinence-- takes two forms… total or periodic. Whenever the couple engages in the marriage act it is unaltered and both unitive and procreative even when no conception occurs. It is as God designed it.
 
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