spiritblows:
If that’s the case, then I’ll skip Mass tommorrow. I have a class I need to study for that I’ve been putting off. I’m much too self concious to do what you say, I just can’t do it. I just can’t handle this. The priest before this priest always had confessions before each Mass. It was the norm and people would often go. But, I just can’t handle this. He gets really put out, he scares me to tell the truth because he’s so easily offended by any thing outside of his routine.
It’s a mortal sin to miss Mass unless you are very sick or one of the other reasons listed by the Church. Then, let there be no doubt that you created a mortal sin.
Ok, look - its easy. Call whatever parish you want to go to ahead of time and ask if you can schedule a private confession. Explain that you really feel the need for privacy and can he be in the confessional when you get there for this special time.
I wish it were easier for you. I can imagine being in where there are few priests. This sacrament is available in my parish in abundance as there are lots of priests. It is often available before weekday Masses.
Either way, you can’t skip Mass on the count of this. You are punishing the Lord by not giving him due worship, because you have supposedly sinned. Instead, go to Mass and sit in the back if necessary. People don’t know if you are abstaining because you ate something before Mass or not. Keep in mind too that humility is something that counters pride. So if it is humiliating to go to Mass and abstain from Holy Communion, meditate on the humility it took for God to become Man, dwell among us, then be further humiliated by being crucified on a hill known as a garbage dump after he was stripped naked - all on the count of our sins.
I was going to a daily Mass and settled into a nice orthodox parish. I forced myself to have the mother-of-all-confessions, face-to-face, with the pastor, whom I did not know. I let go of a pretty bad sinful habit that day and stayed clean for a good two months before falling. I had made God a promise that if I fell in such a manner again, I would go back to the same confessor. I was so humiliated by what I had done that I didn’t think I could face him because now, I came to know him through activities in the parish. So, like a child who knows I had done wrong, I wanted to “hide”. My first thought was about communion and not being able to go, and what would people think. Then I saw this as a prideful thought and pride is a sin itself. I finally dragged myself back to him and I told him that despite my promise to come back to him with this specific sin, I wanted to run from him and the parish. But, I knew if I did that, it would be all over and the habit would once again rule my life. That confession was the best thing I could have done. We talked about the pride as well as the habit and with the grace of God, I have been free for months now of this particular sin.
Pride is sinful and it is stealthy or hard to identify. It is at the root of many things so do not underestimate it for that which is the clearer sin.
And, if you are feeling really down about all that you have done, this is good. It is a grace from God. Remember, he already knows what you have done and are going to do and is just waiting for you to own up to it in the Sacrament of Penance.
No matter how hard it is to get through just the task of finding a confessor under the right circumstances, if you must settle for something less comfortable, offer it up as a sacrifice, which is even greater in the eyes of the Lord, than prayer. Sacrifice is a form of prayer, especially when it involves an act of humility.
I wish my husband hadn’t died. He was very nice and sweet.
