No sex

  • Thread starter Thread starter ADiosgracias
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You don’t really think that was the reason Joseph and Mary lived a celibate life, do you? I will admit, that may have made it easier for Joseph and more respectful towards Mary, and maybe that is one of the reasons he was chosen to be her spouse.
Well, that is the Eastern belief in it anyway, the way you described it. It may have even been a usual thing of the culture and time it happened. I know today it may seem odd for us to have an older man become betrothed to a very young girl, maybe not during their time.
 
Can a couple get married with the intention of not having sex? What happen with Deacons?
Wasn’t the case of the blessed Mary and St Joseph?
In the East, priests and deacons continue to have marital relationships with their spouses. Though it is desirable if both move towards monasticism, it is never forced upon them. Of course sex is to be fasted on the same way with food, prior to Communion and in times of fasting.

I think it is the same way with Deacons in the Latin Rite. Not sure about married men accepted into the priesthood though.
 
We vow to be open to life when we marry. How is this open to life?

Luna
Open to life means that they accept children if they occur as a result of their union. It is possible for both to not ask for conjugal relations even while not denying one another the gift of conjugal relations.
 
the church strongly discourages having the will not to consummate a marriage, not consummating the marriage is grounds for annulment, and I think is the one through the centuries that has always been grounds
See the other posts above. Such is a possible practice it is not per se grounds for annulment here…an annulment means that it is found that a marriage never existed. In this case it does in fact exist. The rare marriage of this sort has the exchange of the right to the marital act --but they choose not to exercise that right.

(Now if there is a change of mind and the other spouse refuses the martial right – well then it can be looked into if the person actually entered into a valid marriage --then it could perhaps be found to be null. It can also be dissolved if it was valid since it was not consummated.)
 
A man who becomes a deacon when he is married may continue to have a normal marriage like anyone else including having sex with his wife.
It’s worth noting that while this is the widespread practice, apparently canon law is not as clear-cut on the matter. At least one well-respected canonist has opined that married deacons are canonically required to refrain from intercourse. That the widespread practice is the opposite suggests one of three possibilities:

  1. *]Catechesis and enforcement of this canon has been abysmal,
    *]The Vatican has de facto changed its policy on the matter, and simply failed to bring the text of the canon(s) into harmony with current policy, or
    *]Those scholars who see a discrepancy between the practice and the law have misread the law.
 
A man who becomes a deacon when he is married may continue to have a normal marriage like anyone else including having sex with his wife. A man may not marry however, subsequent to recieving the sacrament of holy orders. This means that permanent deacons are expected to live a life of celibacy if they are unmarried when they become a deacon or if their wife dies.

The only exception is if the deacon is returned to the lay state - laicized - by the Pope. The man is still a member of the order of diaconate by virtue of the sacrament of holy orders because sacraments cannot be undone, but if he is returned to the lay state he will no longer function as a deacon and will be free to marry. Only the Pople may laicize.

Our parish had a deacon who was laicized. The had eight children, some of them young, when his wife died, plus he was diabetic. There was no way he was going to raise eight children on his own. He met a woman and wanted to get married, and so he went to Rome and requested laicization from the Holy Father who grated it. This is not a normal occurance however.

-Tim-
I wonder why he didn’t simply ask for permission to remarry? There are exceptions to the rule that deacons cannot remarry, and the principle one is when the deacon has young children to care for.
 
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