Nobody's there for confession?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Merry
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
M

Merry

Guest
My church has confession listed at 11am on Saturdays. I showed up yesterday just before 11 and nobody was there. The church was locked. I waited around, and at 11:15 I left without anyone showing up.

This is only my second time going to confession (I was baptized last Easter). Last time, the church was open, but there was a funeral going on. I waited, and after the priest just happened to noticed me and told me confession is cancelled when there is a funeral. But he was able to hear my confession anyhow.

Was I correct in thinking that I would normally just show up at the time listed and a priest would be there for confession? Or am I doing something wrong?

I was all ready to confess, and it was really upsetting to leave without getting the opportunity.
 
A priest should have definitely shown up to hear confessions. If there was an emergency, a note could have been posted. Do you only have one priest at your church?

I can offer two suggestions: you could call ahead to make sure confessions are being heard at the stated time, or you could make a separate appointment with the priest.

I am sorry that this happened to you, especially being a new Catholic. Please don’t let it affect your faith.
God knows that you wanted to confess and thats what really counts. 👍
 
Merry said:
My church has confession listed at 11am on Saturdays. I showed up yesterday just before 11 and nobody was there. The church was locked. I waited around, and at 11:15 I left without anyone showing up.

This is only my second time going to confession (I was baptized last Easter). Last time, the church was open, but there was a funeral going on. I waited, and after the priest just happened to noticed me and told me confession is cancelled when there is a funeral. But he was able to hear my confession anyhow.

Was I correct in thinking that I would normally just show up at the time listed and a priest would be there for confession? Or am I doing something wrong?
Click to expand...
Hi friend,
Yes, I really want to say that you were correct in thinking that your would just show up. You’re not doing anything wrong. I hope you get to confess soon.
Peace
 
If it’s a regularly scheduled Confession time, yes, a priest should have been there. Please give him the benefit of the doubt and assume that an important matter came up that he had to attend to. I was in a similar situation once where I showed up at the scheduled Confession time of 3:45 for Confession. I left at 4:00 feeling somewhat upset because the priest never showed. I think the sacristan must have said something to him, because he said at a meeting I was at the next day, that he was late coming back from a meeting and that’s why he missed the scheduled Confession.

Perhaps you could say to your priest next time you see him, “I would like to go to Confession next Saturday, will you be there if I come at 11:00?” That will let him know that he needs to be there or else post a note or otherwise let you know if something comes up that prevents him from being there.
 
Yes, the priest should have been there, and you did nothing wrong. I would definitely give him the benefit of the doubt though, maybe ask him discreetly if he’ll be there at 11:00 next week.
 
Merry said:
My
This is only my second time going to confession (I was baptized last Easter). Last time, the church was open, but there was a funeral going on. I waited, and after the priest just happened to noticed me and told me confession is cancelled when there is a funeral. But he was able to hear my confession anyhow.
.
Click to expand...
unless somebody comes up with a way a priest can be in two places at the same time we will have to become resigned to occasions like this. Are you sure this weekend it was not weather related? Do you know for a fact he was not on a sick call or otherwise called away? The charitable and natural thing to do is assume he had a good reason and would have been there if possible, and that in your area, like a large part of the country, simply has no extra priests available when these things come up.
 
Personally I would have called the parish office and asked. It could be that Father simply forgot or got tied up on a phone call.

But to answer you questions, yes, generally you simply show up anytime during the posted time. If it says confessions are being heard from 11 - 11:30 you should be able to come anytime within that half hour.
 
Keep trying. Use www.masstimes.org to scan parishes in the area by zip code that have confession times posted.

Look for parishes through this website that have devotions too such as Eucharistic adoration. These are more likely to be the parishes that have priests that want to hear confessions and are also good at it - spiritual direction that is.

If a parish has few or no frequenters of the Sacrament of Penance, it is either an incredibly holy parish or this sacrament has been purposefully diminished by the leadership there. The latter is not uncommon. I can tell you it is the case in my own parish.

I go to the sacrement of penance at other parishes usually.
 
It’s also possible that the bulletin, or whatever publication in which you noted the Confession times, is out of date. It would be good to call the office to verify correct times.
 
Samuel63 said:
Keep trying. Use www.masstimes.org to scan parishes in the area by zip code that have confession times posted.

Look for parishes through this website that have devotions too such as Eucharistic adoration. These are more likely to be the parishes that have priests that want to hear confessions and are also good at it - spiritual direction that is.

If a parish has few or no frequenters of the Sacrament of Penance, it is either an incredibly holy parish or this sacrament has been purposefully diminished by the leadership there. The latter is not uncommon. I can tell you it is the case in my own parish.

I go to the sacrement of penance at other parishes usually.
Click to expand...
Good advice. At my previous parish the priest was not very reliable at being there at the regular confession time (or he would get there late and not have enough time to hear all the confessions before Mass started), so I found a parish that reliably had at least one priest, and sometimes two, available at their regular confession time. And there was always a line of people when we went, so I think the fact that there were alot of people going made the priest be responsible to be there. It’s the same where I live now – I don’t go to my parish but to another one that has a very reliable priest at a regularly scheduled time for confession.
 
It is certainly possible that the priests were otherwise occupied on more important business. At our parish we have three priests, but two of them are retired. They regularly say mass for us on Sundays, but it is quite possible that they don’t normally hear confession. I wasn’t trying to be uncharitable nor did I assume that the priest was at home watching hockey or something! It is only that it is upsetting to remember one’s sins and then not be able to confess them! They weigh more heavily on my conscience now. Given that it was only my second time arriving for confession, and the second time nobody was there to hear it, it occurred to me that the fault might be with me. As a new Catholic, I am still learning about Catholic culture and traditions.

I don’t think the information on confession time was out of date, as someone suggested, because it is marked every Sunday in our bulletin. They changed the regular time about a year ago, and announced that they were doing so at the end of mass. Calling the parish office might have been a possibility, but I would have had to return home to do that. Probably I should have knocked on the door of the parish office which is next door to the church. I believe that is also where our priests live. I admit I considered it, but it felt invasive and rude to do so. Normally I would never drop in at someone’s house unannounced. It somehow seems extra rude to do so to a priest! I also admit that I tend to see any roadblock as some kind of sign that I am on the wrong path, rather than that I just need to try harder.

I do think that my parish doesn’t particularly value confession. When we discussed it during RCIA it was implied that it was an extra perk, if you felt your mental health needed it. I love my parish because they welcomed me when I wanted to join the church after my more local parish couldn’t help me. But they tend to be a little more… relaxed?

I think the suggestion of finding another parish for confession might be the best solution for me. I know there is one parish in my area that has adoration regularly. That might be a good place to look. Thanks for your help.
 
puzzleannie said:
unless somebody comes up with a way a priest can be in two places at the same time we will have to become resigned to occasions like this. .
Click to expand...
Meetings and funerals should not be scheduled during posted confession times.
Emergency sick calls can’t be helped.
 
I LOVE adoration. I went this past Saturday and prayed, said a rosary and just sat, with my eyes closed and listened for the Lord.

I had a wonderful moving experience, in that I showed up at my scheduled time and found a Baptism just ending. I was quite confused. I hung around and the Priest showed up and told me to sit tight, he was going to bring the Lord out for exposition. So I waited while he got himself prepared. Well, it turned out that he and I were the only 2 there, so it was very personal and moving to watch him expose the blessed sacrament, sing the adoration him and bless the alter/Host.

While I have been there for this ceremony before, it has been crowded and you can’t always see, and people are figetting, whispering…It being just the 2 of us was amazing. I was really amazed.
 
I echo the advice to keep trying - either at the same church or elsewhere. My parish has scheduled confessions on Saturday from 11-11:30 AM. Two weeks ago, I went into the church at 11:20 and found the place empty. Father is very good about staying until 11:30, so I have to assume something unexpected came up. The same thing may have happened to you.

If confession is regularly canceled at your your parish, I’m sure there are a number of other priests nearby who would love to hear your confession. You’re not obligated to confess at your regular parish - any Catholic church will do.
 
Samuel63 said:
If a parish has few or no frequenters of the Sacrament of Penance, it is either an incredibly holy parish or this sacrament has been purposefully diminished by the leadership there. The latter is not uncommon. I can tell you it is the case in my own parish
Click to expand...
or it is a parish with no resident priest, and confessions are heard by appoitnment, on the days he is actually in the parish, or before or after the Masses he celebrates there.

American Catholics, look to reality, this nation is rapidly becoming mission territory where we will have sacraments available only when a priest is able to visit, not on demand or even every weekend.

in the valley, unless you are at a mission, you had better get to confession a half hour before the posted times because the lines will be long, and those who get there after the posted time will likely be asked to wait until after Mass, but I know of no priest, unless he has a commitment at another parish or mission, who will not come back after Mass if there were still people in line.

It also possible, especially if the priest had another commitment, if no one was waiting at the posted time, he simply left after 10 minutes or so.
 
puzzleannie said:
…
It also possible, especially if the priest had another commitment, if no one was waiting at the posted time, he simply left after 10 minutes or so.
Click to expand...
The OP said: “My church has confession listed at 11am on Saturdays. I showed up yesterday just before 11 and nobody was there…I waited around, and at 11:15 I left without anyone showing up.”
If the padre posts hours for confession, barring an emergency, he should be there.
Administering the sacraments is the most important thing that a priest does. Busy or not, he should not make other commitments during his posted confession times.
 
roadsend said:
Meetings and funerals should not be scheduled during posted confession times.
Emergency sick calls can’t be helped.
Click to expand...
At my parish there are confession times on Saturdays from 3 to 4pm in addition to daily confession before Mass. It is impossible to predict when there might be a conflict with Saturday confession schedule. Wedding rehearsals are more likely than funeral to disrupt the schedule. But if confessions cannot be heard in the church confessionals because something else is going on, one of the priests will hear confessions in the adoration chapel, which also has confessionals, at the scheduled time.
 
That works as long as the policy is clear in the posted confession schedule.
As far as wedding rehearsals are concerned, they can easily be scheduled in the morning, evening or early afternoon. They don’t have to conflict with the confession schedule.
 
roadsend said:
That works as long as the policy is clear in the posted confession schedule.
As far as wedding rehearsals are concerned, they can easily be scheduled in the morning, evening or early afternoon. They don’t have to conflict with the confession schedule.
Click to expand...
Well, the schedule is posted, but even with three priests, it is still possible that something will come up that will on occasion interfere with the schedule. There is always something going on at the church. Saturday morning there is Mass at 8am, often followed by a funeral at 10 or 11. And there may be more than one funeral in one day, and more than one wedding scheduled on the same day. It can get hectic.

But scheduled confessions are available six days a week. It is not a big problem.
 
puzzleannie said:
unless somebody comes up with a way a priest can be in two places at the same time we will have to become resigned to occasions like this. Are you sure this weekend it was not weather related? Do you know for a fact he was not on a sick call or otherwise called away? The charitable and natural thing to do is assume he had a good reason and would have been there if possible, and that in your area, like a large part of the country, simply has no extra priests available when these things come up.
Click to expand...
If a soldier, policeman, fireman leaves his post, it is not uncharitable to report that. He shall be there for reason. To hear confessions is much more important task than that of the soldiers, firemen or policemen; the eternal life can depend on a missed confession.

Every parish has staff outside of the priest. If the priest has call for a deathbed (since hearing confessions is the most important function of a priest any other reason is unacceptable) he still must have time to call somebody to leave a note that he will be there at such and such time

Once I went to make confession when there was a funeral. The priest sent an altar server to tell me that the confession will be 30 minutes late, and he came and heard my confession.

As for the funeral colluding with regular confession time, my opinion is, that the confession should have priority. As everyone takes it natural that there is no funeral at Sunday, so had to accept also that there is no funeral at regular confession time.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top