Non Catholic attending mass

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SammiLeeds

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Hi everyone

So I’m a baptised Anglican, but have been pretty much atheist all my life. I recently started attending exposition of the blessed sacrament at a Catholic church, then vespers and have now been to mass a couple of times.

I’ve got a couple of mass questions tho, maybe you guys can help?

So it’s midweek mass I’ve been going to, which attracts like 20 or 30 people. When everyone shakes hands at the sign of peace the nearest person is at the end of my row. So id shuffled down a bit to shake hands. Then i read on here somewhere that you’re not supposed to move. Is that right? Will I have upset people?

Secondly, obviously I don’t go up for communion. I’m the only one who doesn’t so do I sit down ? People come back from taking communion and kneel down for a bit, so I don’t want to offend anyone.

It’s all very new to me, so I am just trying to take it all in and do what others do. But i don’t want to upset anyone with my actions.

Help please!

Thanks 😊
 
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I see no problem in moving a bit to shake hands, especially when there are only a few people there in attendance. When Communion goes on, I would suggest kneeling as the correct thing to do. We don’t sit again until after the Priest sits.
 
Catholic married to a Lutheran here. My husband will just sit while people go up to Communion. We aren’t typically at a Mass where there is handshaking but from what I’ve seen it’s okay and normal to move a bit within your own pew to shake hands. Just don’t start roaming the aisles lol.
 
  1. If other people are moving to shake hands, it’s fine for you to do so. In some parishes, other people just wave or make an upraised hand or a “peace sign” from where they are at.
    “When in Rome, do as the Romans do” with respect to the Sign of Peace. Some parishes are very into going around shaking hands and others, for reasons of local culture or the ethnic makeup of the church or the preference of the priest, are not.
  2. It is okay for you to just sit in the pew at Communion time; move as needed in order to let others who are receiving in and out of the pew.
After Communion, some parishes kneel and pray, other ones stand and pray. I would be fine with a non-Catholic either sitting in the pew, or doing what the rest of the congregation is doing (kneeling or standing until the priest sits at which time they sit). It’s your choice what you want to do. My husband was non-Catholic and didn’t go to Communion and he usually sat in the pew. Partly this was because he was a very large man and most pews did not give him enough room to kneel with ease. But in any event it didn’t matter whether he sat or knelt as long as he was quiet and respectful.
 
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Shake hands with as many people as you want to shake hands with.
Kneel while those who are receiving the sacrament are doing so.
Thanks for celebrating the Mass with us!
🙏🙏🙏
 
I move around the pew when I shake hands at the sign of peace. Sometimes I’ll walk across the aisle if I’m close by. Or just nod or even give the peace sign. 🙂

If I don’t go up to receive the Eucharist I stay in the pew and kneel as everyone else that comes back does.
 
At our parish church we don’t move but bow to people saying peace be with you.
 
Welcome. Great to have you attend! Do what feels comfortable. We believe it is actually Jesus under the appearance of bread and wine and try to show that belief with our actions. No talking out loud for example.
I would suggest you pray and ask God to teach you the truth.
I am so happy you made it to mass!!!
 
I take my cues from the people around me for the sign of peace. If someone looks like they want to shake hands, I’ll take a few steps to close the distance. If someone looks like they’re happy standing still, I’ll smile and waggle my fingers at them in a sort of gesture of acknowledgement.

Around here, the etiquette is generally to not sit before the priest re-seats himself after the communion vessels have been cleansed and the ciborium has been placed back in the tabernacle. You can sit if you want to, or if there’s a medical issue at play-- but the default posture is generally kneeling in prayer while you wait, especially while the tabernacle is open.
 
Thanks for the quick replies guys!
The people at the cathedral do seem quite a handshaking bunch, so it sounds like I’m ok moving a bit to join in. Like you said, “when in Rome”!
I’ve taken on board the advice about staying kneeling when others are receiving communion too.
I guess I’ll pick it up better the more I go.

Thanks again everyone.
 
Yes, handshaking at the Peace brings out a variety of responses. What I advise is to follow the old adage: ’ When in Rome …’. Be guided what the other people at Mass are doing.

We kneel after Communion because it’s our sign of respect for Our Lord who we believe is truly present in the Eucharist. As a non-Catholic I believe sitting or kneeling quietly will be fine. Indeed, some people physically can’t kneel so they sit.
 
Never mind! There’s better ones on this better side of the Pennines. 😀
 
I would add to not leave your pew during sign of peace. Sliding down some to greet your neighbor though isn’t a distraction to the mass.

Be sure though that your full attention is back at the altar as soon as the priest begins the “Lamb of God” prayer.
“Sign of peace” is definitely not a time to begin any conversations, and it’s very bad form for “signs of peace” to turn into chattiness or roaming which too often continues into the Lamb of God prayer.

Exciting that you are attending. 🙂
 
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SammiLeeds said:
Hi everyone

So I’m a baptised Anglican, but have been pretty much atheist all my life. I recently started attending exposition of the blessed sacrament at a Catholic church, then vespers and have now been to mass a couple of times.

I’ve got a couple of mass questions tho, maybe you guys can help?

So it’s midweek mass I’ve been going to, which attracts like 20 or 30 people. When everyone shakes hands at the sign of peace the nearest person is at the end of my row. So id shuffled down a bit to shake hands. Then i read on here somewhere that you’re not supposed to move. Is that right? Will I have upset people?
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You’re fine. Back before there were pews, people stood all bunched up, and moved around to make room for others.
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SammiLeeds:
Secondly, obviously I don’t go up for communion. I’m the only one who doesn’t so do I sit down ?
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You can go up with your arms crossed in front of you, indicating you’re unable to receive the Eucharist, but wanting a blessing.
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SammiLeeds:
It’s all very new to me, so I am just trying to take it all in and do what others do. But i don’t want to upset anyone with my actions.

Help please!
Click to expand...
If you have an interest in learning about the mass, there are tons of sources.

Eg: Here are some quick reads
  1. http://www.usccb.org/about/public-a...ture-and-meaning-of-the-mass-backgrounder.cfm
  2. The Church Fathers explain the biblical basis of this historic Christian teaching. Patrick Madrid: The Church Fathers Explain the Mass
Pulling From Scripture particularly letter to the Hebrews Eucharist, Holy Meal

I hope this helps
 
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