As this post reveals…I’m still not over it. What happened to me was, that maybe half a year ago I went to Church after work like every Wednesday evening, and didn’t know that they started ecumenical services on Wednesdays. They were rotating like one Wednesday they’d celebrate at the Evangelical church, and the next Wednesday celebrate at our Catholic church and so on. To make a long story short, what happened was that a Protestant Priestess was reading from the scripures and joined the Priest behind the altar at all times that night. Then, when we were celebrating the Eucharist, I never expected the Priestess to participate and this is why I couldn’t react. We used to (I don’t go there anymore) be a group of maybe ten people, and when receiving the Eucharist we all stood around the altar forming a circle receiving His body and drinking from the cup. Now, the Priest distributed the Eucharist and also the blood of Christ to each one of us, and then received last. What I then saw left me breathless. He distributed the host to the Priestess who received and consumed it, and she also drank His blood.
Till present day - and I went to confession after that, but still can’t forgive myself - I’m going through this situation over and over again. I should have prevented the Priestess from receiving. It all happened within seconds though and while I watched this happening I was shocked so some reaction time was already taken away. I had only one more second or so to keep her from drinking His blood also, yet I didn’t try as I felt pertified from this scene that seemed totally unreal, that could’t be true.
Needless to say, I went to confession asking my Priest about the situation, and for three nights I was scared that my Priest might tell me something along these lines “I can’t give you absolution, because I will have to ask the Bishop first. Come back in a week or two!”
However, he said that I wasn’t sinning. He said that I have to respect authority of the Priesthood, so I wasn’t to interrupt him, and that I am not supposed and at no times to interrupt the liturgy.
I still feel guilty before God; it feels as if my confession did happen, but isn’t valid. Hard to explain.
I had to talk about this sooner or later. Now it’s all out there.