Non Catholic Takes Communion

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MaryTherese1

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I have a non-Catholic friend staying with me who sometimes asks to attend Mass with me…she is very prayerful and in love with God but she seems to have absolutely zero interest in becoming Catholic…She seems to believe that Communion in the Catholic Church is the same as any other Christian Church so I don’t think she believes in transubstantiation…

When I told her she is not supposed to receive Communion, she became very indignant and said it was between her and God and no one should try to deny her receiving…She sometimes goes herself to a Catholic Church she likes and receives…

I love this friend and want to keep peace; I do believe God has her in my home for a reason; but I feel bad taking her to Mass with me knowing that she will receive the Eucharist when she should not. Since I already shared Church teaching with her, should I take her and leave it between her and God or should I avoid taking her?

I know this is a personal situation but any insight is appreciated…Thanks and God bless…
 
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I believe in letting adults be adults and making their own choices. You have made the teaching clear to her but she is not biting.

It really is between herself and God at this point. God may end up being more merciful than we humans. That’s His prerogative.

Pushing the issue may break the friendship and the one stable bond she has with the Church. And that would be on you, not her.

The only other suggestion I have is teach by example. If ever you feel you aren’t in a state of grace, then don’t go up for communion. She may ask why, and you can explain it, but in a way that focuses on your own unworthiness, not hers.
 
Thank you so much…
Yes, actually, I was advised by a priest a long time ago that it is OK to go with her since I already shared the teaching…that God could be moving in her heart somehow…
 
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Out of curiosity, HOW did you explain why she shouldn’t receive Communion?

Because many times, Protestants (I’m assuming she’s protestant) and even some Catholics don’t properly understand what “Communion” means (in the Catholic and Orthodox Churches)
 
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TC3033 said:
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phil19034:
Because many times, Protestants (I’m assuming she’s protestant) and even some Catholics don’t properly understand what “Communion” means.
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Or we have a different teaching on it…
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Yes, correct. I meant they “don’t’ properly understand what ‘Communion’ means” in the Catholic and Orthodox Churches.
 
I think that it is more that they understand it, but don’t accept it. They believe the Catholic Church has the wrong definition, they have the correct one, and so they will abide by their (correct) decision. And since they believe they’re correct in their understanding they don’t believe that they are hurting anybody or being rude (imagine if they were visiting a friend who asked that they take off their shoes and put on ‘indoor’ shoes and since they were perfectly sure that their shoes were ‘nice and clean’ and that people who insisted on ‘indoor shoes’ were germaphobes and just needed to ‘get over it’. It’s the same mindset, what they know is right, what they do is right, and they’ll do it. And the Catholic Church is like the hostess in that case who winces inwardly, makes a faint protest, and then out of a desire to ‘be nice’, goes ahead and lets the rude guest do as he chooses.)
 
stpurl said:
I think that it is more that they understand it, but don’t accept it.
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I don’t know. I don’t think they truly understand it from a Catholic perspective. I think they THINK they understand, but I don’t think they really do.

If they truly understood that by taking Communion they are telling God that they believe in everything the Catholic Church teaches, they would not want to receive.
 
But again, understanding in your sense involves acceptance. But some will not accept.

For example, I understand that the Anglican Church believes its priests have valid orders. But as a Catholic, I do not accept that these orders are valid and that the Anglican priests are equivalent to Catholic priests and that Anglican priests can offer a valid Eucharist. I understand, but I do not accept.

So a nonCatholic hears the Catholic understanding and says, “OK so you guys believe that taking the Eucharist in your church means that I accept all your teachings. I understand that’s what YOU think, but it isn’t what I believe. I understand you, but I don’t accept this. I think taking the Eucharist is a share at a meal for all believers, and that’s what I’m going to do.”
 
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The way I personally would handle this would be to cease being friends with the person. It would be one thing if the friend were a Catholic but simply a not very good Catholic who perhaps committed sins and didn’t go to confession, yet still wanted to march up to Communion. In that case I’d likely give them a little speech about how we’re not supposed to receive unworthily and the importance of going to Confession, then leave it up to them to make their choices.

But in the case of a non-Catholic who insists on receiving Communion when they have been told they aren’t supposed to, I would be telling them okay, sorry, if you want to disrespect our Catholic sacraments like that I am not going to facilitate it, it’s been nice knowing you. That’s just me, and I don’t expect everyone else to do the same as me, but I feel very strongly about that kind of disrespect. It would be like if I were staying with a Muslim friend and I went with them to their place of prayer but there was a mosque that only Muslims were supposed to enter, and I insisted on going in there anyway even though I wasn’t Muslim. It’s just wrong. It’s not the behavior of a friend in my book.
 
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stpurl said:
I think that it is more that they understand it, but don’t accept it. They believe the Catholic Church has the wrong definition, they have the correct one, and so they will abide by their (correct) decision.
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Disagree, nearly 100%. Most of us, that come from an open communion background, don’t even know that closed communion exists… let alone understand it. And, when we do find out all we’re told is “Well because you aren’t Catholic (or insert other closed communion church here).” With no other explanation (usually because the closed communion individual can’t) so that’s all they’re told.

I think you’d be hard pressed to find a lot of Christians from open communion churches who understand the why of closed communion.
 
Sure, but that isn’t what I was replying to… 🤷‍♂️
 
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Nowa said:
But has this friend demonstrate a personal relationship? Maybe this friend is prophetic like in numbers 11:27
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Then she can become Catholic. Until then, she may not receive communion. Thems the rules. 1 Corinthians:
“11:27 Therefore, whosoever shall eat this bread, or drink the chalice of the Lord unworthily, shall be guilty of the body and of the blood of the Lord.
11:28 But let a man prove himself: and so let him eat of that bread and drink of the chalice.
11:29 For he that eateth and drinketh unworthily eateth and drinketh judgment to himself, not discerning the body of the Lord.”
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I don’t walk into your local church and demand you all abandon your beliefs to suit mine. I expect the same courtesy to be shown to my beliefs.
 
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She is very prayerful and has many spiritual gifts actually…I’m so torn… He said she’s insulted that I never invite her to church and I explain that she is always welcome to come with me - I just feel funny about the Communion thing… I feel like I’m enabling something that goes against Church teaching… but on the other hand, like the above poster said, I don’t want to push her away from the Catholic Church either
 
MaryTherese1 said:
I don’t want to push her away from the Catholic Church either
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She’s doing that herself.

You have the right to demand respect for Christ from her. You have the right to tell her that if she continues to disrespect the Lord, she won’t be your friend. Communion, the Eucharist, is far too important to allow unclean hands to desecrate. It’s far too precious to allow people to lie in receiving. Continuing to receive when she knows she isn’t allowed is the height of disrespect and offense.
 
Nowa said:
I also got tricked up with this belief. As catholic is said to mean "universal " I "wrongly " was taught all Christians were members of the universal church of jesus’s christ. But this forum says no .
That the word catholic means the true church
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I don’t think that’s correct. Someone else can correct me if I’m wrong, but from what I’ve picked up from being here: The small “c” catholic is universal. The capital “C” is in regards to the Catholic Church.

Also, what I meant is: Some Catholics can’t even explain the “why” of closed communion. They just know that non-Catholics aren’t welcome to communion because they’re not Catholic (capital C).

@MaryTherese1 I’d probably skip over calling her “dirty” and just go ahead and leave that out…
 
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You need to alert that priest that he’s giving communion to non-Catholics and if he replies with a I don’t care you need to report the priest to your priest or your Diocese. This is absolutely a blasphemy to God and it needs to be fixed immediately. This is not just a sin for the person receiving it is also a sin for the priest to knowingly give and if he knows then he is not in a state of grace and that hurts his whole parish
 
Good manners typically obligate one to accede to the reasonable customs of the host. If I’m told that participation in a particular ritual at Church X is only open to the members of Church X, I should defer accordingly. How arrogant it would be to demand to participate.
 
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