Non Catholics? What bugs you the most about Catholics?

[Plmokn]

What really annoys me is when Catholics say or assume that non-catholics just don’t “understand” the faith and the religion. Actually, I understand it far better than a lot of Catholics I know. I understand it just fine. I just happen to disagree with it. I think it is condescending to say I have a lack of understanding, especially when you don’t know me.

 

[Reuben_J]

What really annoys me is when Catholics say or assume that non-catholics just don’t “understand” the faith and the religion. Actually, I understand it far better than a lot of Catholics I know. I understand it just fine. I just happen to disagree with it. I think it is condescending to say I have a lack of understanding, especially when you don’t know me.

Can you give an example what you disagree with and why?

 

[Reuben_J]

Take for example the Catholic belief that Jesus is God. You said you understand this teaching better than most Catholics. But you disagree that Jesus us God.

Which part that you understand better and why you disagree?

 

[Mike_from_NJ]

Pimokn, I know that feeling. Quite a few times I’ve been told I need to study some aspect of the faith more despite showing that I already understand it. To add to that I find that if I look at something Catholic (or Christian in general), break it down, then point out troubles with that something often times the opposite happens where I’m told that I’m focusing too much on that something. The question then is should I be studying something more or less. I’ve said it before on CAF, if a person disagrees with some part of the faith there never seems to be a sweet spot where its acknowledged a non-believer has a full and proper understanding of the matter.

 

[liane8859]

During Moses time, We have an Ark of Covenant. During this cruel and Dark time mainly, Our time are at the 6 Churches in the Revelation written by Beloved Apostle of Lord Jesus Christ. Our Blessed Mother is the “New Ark of Covenant” A Hope for us during this crucial time. She’s the short cut to Heaven if you MUST knew it. Love Our Mother Mary then You’ll gain Heaven. It’s Catholic message to you all Protestants. Because we knew what you may not know, So we are helping you to be with us.

 

[Reuben_J]

The concept is based on scripture, tradition, and stories being passed down through the ages. None of that is compelling, in the slightest, for me.

I know, you said that already. I just want to know what is that regarding this belief that you know more than the Catholics whom you said knew less than you?

Thanks.

 

[lilypadrees]

In general terms, I find that many Catholics don’t know the difference between, dogma, doctrine, and discipline. Because of this, it is difficult to share ideas with them about faith and beliefs. They don’t understand the origin of their faith and give eye rolls when asked about it. I am not really too much into challenging the faith of others. I believe each of us is allowed to believe what we want to believe, without being challenged on it. However, if I am challenged on my beliefs I can give as good as I get. I find it disappointing that so many Catholics don’t know why they believe the things they do.

Since you assume “that many Catholics don’t know the difference between, dogma, doctrine, and discipline. Because of this, it is difficult to share ideas with them about faith and beliefs. They don’t understand the origin of their faith and give eye rolls when asked about it…,” why don’t you share what you know and give the Catholics here a chance to share what we know about our faith?

 

[Reuben_J]

With due respect, after three posts, you didn’t answer my questions. I am only asking you to elaborate and to give specific example on what you said.

You said you know better. What is it that they (Catholics) don’t know which you know, in your experience with them.

Which dogma/doctrine/discipline?

It would be helpful to us to get feedback from you.

 

[Tax_Collector14]

The problem with the Catholic church is, well, Catholics…as a cradle Catholic I can say this…the greatest inspiration I’ve had, apart from, say, a handful of dynamic priests growing up (not to mention my mother) is Catholic media and what EWTN has brought to the www as well as TV/radio…ironically, those who have inspired me most to dig into the faith I was raised in are converts to the church…mostly evangelical and occasionally, a non-Christian…God MUST have a sense of humor

In any event, Shazi, stay with us on this forum, a lot of us have learned a great deal from you, more specifically on the thread you started about Islam!

 

[Raxus]

Wow well said! Catholics do look down their nose at non catholics. It deceptive to believe other wise

Some do, possibly. I think it’s safe to say that the majority don’t.

I think a lot of what non-Catholics see as “exclusionary” is stuff like non-Catholics not being able to receive the Eucharist. I’ve had a few non-Catholic folks go to Mass with me out of curiosity, or a desire to go to church with a friend on holidays like Christmas.

When it comes to the Eucharist, I always tell them -why- the Church doesn’t allow non-Catholics to receive, so that they understand it’s not a matter of being snide, but of religious importance and proper treatment of what we as Catholics understand to be the physical presence of the Lord.

I would imagine that explaining other things about Catholicism in similar fashion would help non-Catholics to feel less excluded in general.

 

[TC3033]

dann:

Wow well said! Catholics do look down their nose at non catholics. It deceptive to believe other wise

Some do, possibly. I think it’s safe to say that the majority don’t.

I think a lot of what non-Catholics see as “exclusionary” is stuff like non-Catholics not being able to receive the Eucharist. I’ve had a few non-Catholic folks go to Mass with me out of curiosity, or a desire to go to church with a friend on holidays like Christmas.

When it comes to the Eucharist, I always tell them -why- the Church doesn’t allow non-Catholics to receive, so that they understand it’s not a matter of being snide, but of religious importance and proper treatment of what we as Catholics understand to be the physical presence of the Lord.

I would imagine that explaining other things about Catholicism in similar fashion would help non-Catholics to feel less excluded in general.

Ya, that wasn’t what I was talking about…(even though it does suck being left behind, so I usually excuse myself just before communion and meet my family in the gathering space afterwards. That and I don’t need the side-eye from people mad that they need to “climb by” the non-Catholic). either way, that will always make me feel excluded, but like I said that wasn’t what I was talking about.

I was more talking about general parish life:

Why is there an asterisk by my name for everything? If the church “needs” it on their private call list, fine but why on envelopes, yearbooks/picture registry, family mailboxes, etc… That kind of comes of as “snide” that the church needs to make sure everyone knows who isn’t Catholic.

Why isn’t a non-Catholic spouse not necessarily treated the same (as a member) like their Catholic family? If my wife asks me to contact the church for some reason, why do they need to create a whole new message that goes to her, rather than replying to my initial message. Why wouldn’t I be asked to be part of church fellowship, but my wife (and now kids) are…that comes off kind of “snide”

How can that be explained so I can feel less excluded?

 

[Raxus]

Ya, that wasn’t what I was talking about…

even though it does suck being left behind,

No need to be left behind. Join the Church.

That and I don’t need the side-eye from people mad that they need to “climb by” the non-Catholic)

Forgive me, but I think you might be projecting a little bit here. I can virtually guarantee that nobody is mad at you for having to go past you, least of all because you’re not Catholic.

Why is there an asterisk by my name for everything? If the church “needs” it on their private call list, fine but why on envelopes, yearbooks/picture registry, family mailboxes, etc… That kind of comes of as “snide” that the church needs to make sure everyone knows who isn’t Catholic.

You don’t think that’s important for an organization as large as the Church?

Why isn’t a non-Catholic spouse not necessarily treated the same (as a member) like their Catholic family?

Because you yourself are choosing to leave yourself out. That’s on you, bud.

If my wife asks me to contact the church for some reason, why do they need to create a whole new message that goes to her, rather than replying to my initial message.

Because the Church deals in Church matters, and you’re choosing to exclude yourself from those. Seems to me the Church is just honoring your wishes?

Why wouldn’t I be asked to be part of church fellowship, but my wife (and now kids) are…that comes off kind of “snide”

Because, again, you don’t believe all that the Church teaches. “Fellowship” implies a shared belief.

How can that be explained so I can feel less excluded?

I really think the examples you’re highlighting are issues wherein the Church is simply respecting your desire to not be a member; it’s not gonna force itself on anyone.

 

[nearlycatholic]

“Bugs”? NOTHING! Intrigues, interests, draws? Pick a card, any card! The church and faith is fascinating and rich. I love her the more I study her. But I am not Catholic and I don’t understand it all yet so a little patience with my ignorance is very much appreciated.

 

[nearlycatholic]

that’s pretty interesting spidey because it’s amazing to me to hear other people tell me what my church and I believe. I have been studying your faith from your authorized resources and it is important if I know what Catholic really means.

 

[nearlycatholic]

isn’t that “legalism”!

 

[TC3033]

No need to be left behind. Join the Church.

That’s okay, I’m cool with meeting everyone in the gathering space after.

Forgive me, but I think you might be projecting a little bit here. I can virtually guarantee that nobody is mad at you for having to go past you, least of all because you’re not Catholic.

Not really, I’m just sharing what I see and hear.

You don’t think that’s important for an organization as large as the Church?

Sure, like I said I understand it on the church mailing list, I’m not sure why it needs to be on everything including posted in the church.

Because you yourself are choosing to leave yourself out. That’s on you, bud.

OK, bud…I actually learned something here in the passed couple weeks. This may not be a universal belief. Sounds like non-Catholics actually can be and are members of Catholic parishes, so who’s right? The parishes that exclude non-Catholic spouses or the ones that treat them as members (and actually have them as members)?

Because the Church deals in Church matters, and you’re choosing to exclude yourself from those. Seems to me the Church is just honoring your wishes?

Actually, it doesn’t. If my wife asks me to contact the church for any reason…why can 't they reply back to me? If my wife asks me to contact the church, there’s usually a reason for it. I don’t understand why if I send them an email requesting such info or dropping them a message, that they need to send a complete new message to my wife (who if she asked me to get the info…there’s a reason), thus delaying the transmission. Makes no sense to me. Normally it has something to do with my kids and faith formation. You may not want me around, but I still am the father to my kids.

Because, again, you don’t believe all that the Church teaches. “Fellowship” implies a shared belief.

It also implies friendliness and similar beliefs, which I think that most of us have, giving we’re supposed to be brothers and sisters in Christ ¯_(ツ)_/¯

I really think the examples you’re highlighting are issues wherein the Church is simply respecting your desire to not be a member; it’s not gonna force itself on anyone.

I don’t really see it as forcing itself on anyone. I’m married to and the father of 3 of their parish members, I would think that if we’re brothers and sisters of Christ, we’d be treated more as such.

 

[TC3033]

@TheLittleLady , this is kind of the attitude towards non-Catholic spouses that I’ve run into, why I don’t fell welcome at the church, why going to Mass with my family can be so difficult and thus sparked your other thread. With user(s) liking this post (the replies to my experiences) that also shows how some individuals do have a shared belief about non-Catholic spouses that fall in line with what I’ve expressed here.

 

[TheLittleLady]

It breaks my heart when people are unkind and try to pass that off as Christianity.

Christ said something about shaking the dust from your sandals and walking away.

 

[lilypadrees]

@TC3033, what if you and your family were to go to another parish? Get a fresh start. The atmosphere of each parish is different. Maybe you would feel more welcome in a new one than you do in the parish you currently attend with your family.

 

[TC3033]

Maybe… we’re actually on parish #2. Really, the only one we have to go to, we’ve been at once. They were really exclusionary as well, but they have a new priest there who seems to be more progressive.

One of the positives for where my family is at was proximity and their RE program. The RE program has changed and is quite the overload for my wife, so changing is on the table.