Not attending mass due to guilt

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Hi all, this is my first post here and I needed some guidance/advice on sins and mass attendance.

I’ve been struggling a LOT with going to church when in the mean time since my last confession I have sinned and feel way TOO guilty to attend Sunday mass since I won’t accept communion until I have gone to confession again for the “new” sin I have committed. But then if I don’t go then that’s another sin! So then I feel really guilty and just stay home all together until I manage to go to confession the following weekend. Can anyone share some advice on the matter?

Thanks
 
dsp09 said:
Hi all, this is my first post here and I needed some guidance/advice on sins and mass attendance.

I’ve been struggling a LOT with going to church when in the mean time since my last confession I have sinned and feel way TOO guilty to attend Sunday mass since I won’t accept communion until I have gone to confession again for the “new” sin I have committed. But then if I don’t go then that’s another sin! So then I feel really guilty and just stay home all together until I manage to go to confession the following weekend. Can anyone share some advice on the matter?

Thanks
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Yes; make an appointment to go to Confession this week, as soon as possible, and tell the priest everything you have said here (maybe print this off and show it to him). The priest is not there to judge you; he is there to absolve you of your sins so that you can be free and happy.
 
jmcrae said:
Yes; make an appointment to go to Confession this week, as soon as possible, and tell the priest everything you have said here (maybe print this off and show it to him). The priest is not there to judge you; he is there to absolve you of your sins so that you can be free and happy.
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[SIGN]Excellent Advice![/SIGN]
 
And remember, you do not have to receive Communion when you go to Mass, if that is what’s stopping you.
 
Hi, dsp09

I have felt like this before too, so I understand exactly how you feel. I’m sorry to say that there isn’t a trick to not feeling guilty - when we sin, we feel guilt. That’s how it is supposed to be. All I can say is, no matter how guilty I felt for my first sin, I always felt just as bad or worse for subsequently skipping mass. Going to mass… it is such an easy thing, so when I skipped I knew I had no excuse. So my only advice is… go to mass anyways. Don’t receive, but do not feel that you are unworthy of going to church. God still loves you and wants you there with Him and His other disciples! Most importantly, pray hard! I will pray for you as well!
 
dsp09 said:
Hi
I’ve been struggling a LOT with going to church when in the mean time since my last confession I have sinned and feel way TOO guilty to attend Sunday mass since I won’t accept communion until I have gone to confession again for the “new” sin I have committed.
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don’t quite understand your reasoning
you feel you have committed a mortal sin
you have not attended confession
you decided out of “guilt” to avoid Mass, adding another mortal sin every time you miss Mass
why?
because you can’t receive communion???
you are not obligate to receive communion at every Mass, so the very last thing you want to do is stay away from the grace which will give you the strength to return to confession.

the guilt is a healthy natural feeling, and it is what we all should feel when we commit mortal sin, but it is never an excuse to compound the sin. Too bad more of us don’t realize what you do, and act on it, and stay away from communion when we fail this way, and you are setting a good example on that front, but never, ever miss Mass for such a reason. That is like stopping all your heart medication because you had a heart attack, and avoiding your doctor because you feel guilty, you are avoiding the very remedy for your condition.
 
Thanks everyone for your advice. I know its better to just attend mass I just feel guilty not being able to take communion bc I’ve sinned so I kind of feel like I have dirty hands and my face doesnt even deserve to see the altar. Its that embarrassing feeling that makes me just not even want to show my face until I confess. Does any know some strong novenas/prayers that I can pray in the mean time?

Thanks
 
dsp09 said:
Thanks everyone for your advice. I know its better to just attend mass I just feel guilty not being able to take communion bc I’ve sinned so I kind of feel like I have dirty hands and my face doesnt even deserve to see the altar. Its that embarrassing feeling that makes me just not even want to show my face until I confess. Does any know some strong novenas/prayers that I can pray in the mean time?

Thanks
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The Divine Mercy Chaplet and the Prayer to St. Michael are very helpful in these situations. 🙂
 
I was in a similar situation when I began looking into coming back to the Church. The best I can tell you is force yourself to go.
I attended Mass without receiving the Eucharist for six months! Iknew I needed to confess, but the anxiety kept me back.
The more I went to Mass, the stronger my desire for the Eucharist became until it outweighed my fear of confession.
I know that doesn’t seem to be your exact case. I’m not sure what it is that’s keeping you from confession. But the point is, don’t despair, friend. Jesus wants you there no matter what you’ve done, I promise. Trust in Jesus, and keep pushing forward towards Him. 🙂
 
dsp09 said:
Thanks everyone for your advice. I know its better to just attend mass I just feel guilty not being able to take communion bc I’ve sinned so I kind of feel like I have dirty hands and my face doesnt even deserve to see the altar. Its that embarrassing feeling that makes me just not even want to show my face until I confess. Does any know some strong novenas/prayers that I can pray in the mean time?

Thanks
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Pray the Rosary. The Devil did this to St.Teresa of Avila for many years. She had given up prayer because she did not feel as though she was doing it well. This is a trick of the devil, he will tell you the sin is not that bad before you do it and afterwards will tell you it is too big to be forgiven.

The Church on the other hand tells you how bad the sin really is before you do it and what dire consequences there are. After you commit it She will tell you no sin is too big to be forgiven provided you are sorry, which you are. So go to Mass and do not receive Communion. Reason must overcome feelings.
 
You’re all right, thanks for the encouragement. I’m going to try to say the chaplet of divine mercy every friday at 3pm to help me build a stronger faith in myself. It’s hard being 25 now a days with the pressure of society and pushing not to sin and commit certain acts when “everyone does it” So please pray for me. I know what the right path is but I feel really lost and hopeless each time I get off track.
 
dsp09 said:
Thanks everyone for your advice. I know its better to just attend mass I just feel guilty not being able to take communion bc I’ve sinned so I kind of feel like I have dirty hands and my face doesnt even deserve to see the altar. Its that embarrassing feeling that makes me just not even want to show my face until I confess. Does any know some strong novenas/prayers that I can pray in the mean time?

Thanks
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Sin of presumption before we sin and sin of despair after we sin. That is what the evil one wants to make you think. Do not fall in the trap.
 
dsp09 said:
You’re all right, thanks for the encouragement. I’m going to try to say the chaplet of divine mercy every friday at 3pm to help me build a stronger faith in myself. It’s hard being 25 now a days with the pressure of society and pushing not to sin and commit certain acts when “everyone does it” So please pray for me. I know what the right path is but I feel really lost and hopeless each time I get off track.
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We are all praying for you! :gopray2:

Remember too that we live in an age of “immediate access”. Watch a Mass on TV, or listen to one recorded and available on the Internet. You will be quickly reminded of what you are missing!

Soon enough, the Holy Spirit will knock the Devil to his knees, and you will be filled with the urge to attend Mass!
 
Well, you are right that you do need to get to confession soon. But miss Mass because of the fact? Puh-leeze!

What is going on here, if you’ve ever heard of the “discernment of spirits,” is that the spirit of evil is using your guilt to draw you away from God. In very simplistic terms, the spirit of evil (whether it be the devil, the world, the flesh) tries to force, coerce, cajole, wheedle, plead, or anything to get the person to move away from God. This spirit is exploiting your natural (and probably healthy) feelings of guiltiness for an actual sin by telling you that you’re not worthy to be in the same building as the Most Holy Sacrament. By doing that, this spirit is moving you further away from God.

Once you can recognize that it is a spirit of evil (using a disguise of guilt and piety) doing this, you can reject its suggestion and do what you know is the correct thing to do–go to Mass, and confession as soon as possible.

Just stay in the pew when it’s time for communion. This is one reason I think the pre-Eucharistic fast should be lengthened to at least three hours: If you stayed in the pew back in the day, everyone just thought you had inadvertently eaten something within that window. They didn’t assume that someone who stayed back was in a state of sin.

In case you think my discussion of the discernment of spirits is something “new agey,” it isn’t. It’s directly from the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius of Loyola!
 
OP: Do you go to a doctor when you are sick? Doctors are there to aide in our physical healing, and Reconciliation is there for our spiritual healing. Go celebrate the Sacrament, and be healed. And remember, it is free. Jesus has already paid for us all.

DGB
 
Go to Mass! Even if you haven’t confessed, you’re still obligated! If you feel unworthy to show your face or even look at the altar, then good. None of us are worthy - even if we have confessed. It is the Living God who descends upon the altar! Who is worthy?

Prior to the 20th century, it was very, very common for the vast majority of Catholics to come to Mass and yet not commune. It was only in the 20th century that the Popes encouraged more frequent communion. Not saying that this should be the case again - God forbid! But it’s just a testament to the fact that you should not present yourself indiscriminately to commune with Christ just because you showed up to Mass - especially if you haven’t been practicing our weekly and seasonal fasts or preparing yourself for it through Confession and penitential acts and prayers. However, you SHOULD still show up to Mass. You can still hear the Gospel, celebrate as a community, adore the Lord in the Host, say your novenas and prayers there in Christ’s Presence and receive many graces.

Don’t give up!
 
dsp09 said:
Thanks everyone for your advice. I know its better to just attend mass I just feel guilty not being able to take communion bc I’ve sinned so I kind of feel like I have dirty hands and my face doesnt even deserve to see the altar. Its that embarrassing feeling that makes me just not even want to show my face until I confess. Does any know some strong novenas/prayers that I can pray in the mean time?

Thanks
Click to expand...
Remember when St Peter felt the same, and said to Jesus ‘Lord, depart from me, for I am a sinful man’? Jesus did not leave Peter then or at any time afterwards. Neither will He depart from you, no matter what your sins. He came to redeem you, not to abandon you.
 
I was vacationing in France a couple of weeks ago. I committed a mortal sin. I tried to work out how to confess, but in the end, I couldn’t make it happen. I knew that I still had an obligation to go to Mass the following Sunday.

I attended a Mass in the Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris. I did not receive, because I was still in sin. Yes, I would have loved to receive the Eucharist in that cathedral. But my sin made that impossible yet I was still obligated to attend Mass.

All of that is to say, no matter what, you need to get to Mass. Stay in the pews and offer prayers for those in purgatory. In the church I attend, there are always many people who do not receive, for whatever reason.

You are a part of the Body of Christ, remember? You need to be there for the rest of the Body. It’s not just for you.

🙂
 
Confession is there so you can unburden yourself of those sins and that guilt, and to dispense the grace to avoid it in the future. Pray the Confiteor as part of your going-to-bed routine. And really, take advantage of Confession! You don’t need to be scrupulous and overwhelmed when you have a whole ocean of graces waiting to be poured out for you. Satan wants you to feel so ****** about yourself that you don’t want to show your face at Mass, so you don’t receive the graces from going (and heap another mortal sin upon yourself by not going) even if you can’t or don’t receive the Host. He wants you to get mired down in this sin-misery and get you as far away from Mass as possible. The solution: go to Mass. Go to Confession. There, he is already defeated. Pray to St Michael the Archangel to help you in times of temptation. If it’s a habitual sin, avoid the occasion of sin by breaking your routine for that part of the day and injecting a Rosary or other prayer time there.

Truthfully, no, you are not worthy to show your face before Him—none of us are. That is why He pours out His mercy to us. We don’t deserve Him, and that is why it is grace. So avail yourself of all the grace you can receive, not by avoiding the sources of grace, but taking full advantage of them–Mass and Confession.

God bless.
 
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