Number of Kids

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HisIsTheCrown

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I do not intend discussions and critics to other people’s behavior.
I just wanted to know what people think and feel today, depending of their age level.
So, I would like to know what YOU and YOU SPOUSE think it is the ideal number of kids to have in today’s world.
It would be nice to know if your children and grown ups already, you are raising kids, you have babies or you do not have kids at all.
I am not using polls (though I love them) for I love to hear people’s voices (that is why I am in CAF?.
Thanks,
 
Well, I raised 2 kids, then adopted 2 more with my husband and raised a stepdaughter. I feel bad that I turned down one foster child who needed to be adopted, because I had a new baby at the time. In my opinion, Mother Theresa was right, saying there are too many children is like saying there are too many flowers.
Of course you have to be realistic and not take on more than you can handle.
 
Hubby and I just have one now.

We know we want more then 2…after that we are a bit undecided.

I think 4 might be a good number for us.

However, we just found out hubby will be layed off for a short period of time…this pretty much means we can’t have another kiddo for a little while…oh well.
 
My darling husband and I have six children, ranging in age from 13 down to 2. It’s doubtful that we will have more, my health and fertility being what they are, but if we do, we do. Six, seven, what’s the difference? 🤷 We had planned, back when we were Protestants, to be “done” at three children.

We were so, so wrong. Our family would have been incomplete without our other little ones!
 
We have five children, plus one we lost to miscarriage. I don’t know that we’ll be able to have more, but I would gladly take twice as many as we have now. My wife would love more, but maybe not quite as many more as I’d like. She’s definitely open to 2-3 more, but she thinks that would probably be her limit.
 
However many God chooses to entrust to our care. At the moment that number is exactly zero, but we maintain hope 🙂 And if not, well…then we’ll just assume He has some other purpose in mind for us.
 
My husband and I have always said we’re not saying a specific number. We don’t want to say 3, and feel like we can’t have 4, or feel that if we only have 2 we didn’t have enough. We want to add to our family as it feels right and when we’re sure we can support each one financially and emotionally. I think we definitely can not have, say, 20. But I can see us with 5 or 6 or just 2 or 3. We’ll see what the Lord has planned for us. 🙂

We currently have 2, one born and one on the way! 🙂
 
However many God wants us to have! Since our ideal number does not depend on what we want, and it is impossible for us to know what God has in store for us in the future, I cannot give an exact figure :). I can tell you, however, that for sure it is at least 5 :), because we have 5 so far (ages 1-7). 🙂
 
As many as God entrusts to our care!

Right now we have a four year old, a little firecracker who turned two today, one little saint in heaven and one who’s expected to arrive at the beginning of November.

I think it’s really hard to judge exactly how much you can handle ahead of time. Before I had one I didn’t feel like I’d be able to handle having one (except in the far off nebulous realm of “someday”). For me that was the hugest adjustment we’ve come up against so far, shifting the thinking from “me, me, me” to someone else. So far two has actually been much easier than one because they play together. I’m sure there will be plenty of ups and downs, but all in all the last year has taught me to grateful for any lives God entrusts to us and rejoice in their arrival!
 
It’s just up to you and your spouse. Everyone is different. We have five now, and are expecting the sixth in 2 months. Plus we lost one to miscarriage. We use NFP to space the kids out a bit, but I try to remain open to life.

It is more difficult when your entire family are Protestants and they think you are absolute fools enslaved to Rome. We have always been on the poor side, my hubby doesn’t make that much, but God has always provided for our needs. My family and my in-laws think we are a bunch of stupid Catholics.

Health is a bigger issue than money IMO. If having another child would endanger my and my child’s life, then we would use NFP to completely avoid pregnancy.
 
We have our fourth on the way now, due in November. Our oldest is 5. I really think that 4 might be it, but of course we will welcome any more kids that we are blessed with. I’d be content to be done now because our stress level has reached the max we can stand at this point. I also worry a little about feeding them all when I have 3 teenage boys. Guess I’ll have to take up deer hunting again because ducks don’t provide quite enough food for our family for any extended period of time.
 
28562 said:
We have our fourth on the way now, due in November. Our oldest is 5. I really think that 4 might be it, but of course we will welcome any more kids that we are blessed with. I’d be content to be done now because our stress level has reached the max we can stand at this point. I also worry a little about feeding them all when I have 3 teenage boys. Guess I’ll have to take up deer hunting again because ducks don’t provide quite enough food for our family for any extended period of time.
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Maybe waiting a little while for the boys become teenagers, then have another one that way then you will have 3 others to help so your blood pressure doesn’t raise the roof :D.
 
HisIsTheCrown said:
I do not intend discussions and critics to other people’s behavior.
I just wanted to know what people think and feel today, depending of their age level.
So, I would like to know what YOU and YOU SPOUSE think it is the ideal number of kids to have in today’s world.
It would be nice to know if your children and grown ups already, you are raising kids, you have babies or you do not have kids at all.
I am not using polls (though I love them) for I love to hear people’s voices (that is why I am in CAF?.
Thanks,
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Today’s ideal for my husband and me is 10 children because that is what we have today. 🙂 I would be more than thrilled to have another (or two!) but realize my age is catching up with me. I had my current baby (almost 8 months) at the age of 41. I am 42 and can honestly see us having more. Our oldest is 19 and will be going away for college in the fall (he did his first year of college at a local university to save $) To the poster worried about the teenage boys eating, I find that my little children (6,4,2 & 8 mo) eat more than my 4 teenagers.

My grandmother always said that worry is a sign of a lack of faith. Trust God a bit and he will provide what you need. 👍

God bless!
 
I am the OP, and I am thanking you for the feedback. I like to hear people. I like to hear what people think.

I had 2 boys who are adults. I was old when I married for I had been in the Seminary but Christ kicked me out telling me to get married.

I wished a girl. I retired and I am a Education Manager Projects. One of them is Tutoring a Girls Home for kids whose families have problems. There are 30 girls there and though they are not my daughters it is rewarding to help.

It is a fight everyday. First, to learn how to deal with girls. With troubled girls. Who sometimes run away having the police to take them in again. Fight, fight, fight, for every drop of sweat is worth maybe 1000 troubles less in adulthood.

I feel that God has given me much more than I deserved and Society much more than I expected, a loving wife, 2 lovely boys, so I feel that I must give back a tiny little bit of the much I was given.

Thanks for your insights…
 
HisIsTheCrown said:
I do not intend discussions and critics to other people’s behavior.
I just wanted to know what people think and feel today, depending of their age level.
So, I would like to know what YOU and YOU SPOUSE think it is the ideal number of kids to have in today’s world.
It would be nice to know if your children and grown ups already, you are raising kids, you have babies or you do not have kids at all.
I am not using polls (though I love them) for I love to hear people’s voices (that is why I am in CAF?.
Thanks,
Click to expand...
Hi. I am 26 years old and my husband and I have been married for a little over a year with no kids as of yet.

I really don’t think there is an “ideal number of kids.” It really just depends on the situation and the people involved.

The Duggars have 19 kids, and that seems to be working out just fine for them… while on the other hand we have couples who are naturally infertile, have chosen not to adopt, and 0 kids is working out just fine for them too!

As for me and my husband personally?

We plan on keeping an open mind overall and don’t have a specific number in mind at the moment. If I had to guess, I’d say we probably won’t have a big family due to my husband’s career choice. I can see myself having a relatively small to medium sized family, but who knows. 👍
 
I am 26 and my husband is 33. Our first son is still cooking. he is due in 2 or 3 weeks. I am curious if my opinion will change at all the other side of labor, but I would say we want 3 to 5 kids. Now all of this is subject to God’s will. My husband leans more towards the 3kids (out of concern for supporting them, nothing to do with not wanting to bring more into the world) and I say up to five because I would be trying for four and who knows what happens from there. We bought this house thinking I was infertile(thank God that wasn’t true, I was so surprised and happy), so 3 would fit better without bunk beds but I love kids and I love this house so we will bunk bed the place up if need be.
 
We don’t have an ideal number in mind and are leaving it up to God to decide.
 
As many as God chooses.

I have nine and love everything about having a large family. My kids get a kick out of people’s reactions, and it’s great to see the interactions among the various kids. We have enough to have a choir, a jazz band, a softball team, build human pyramids, whatever. All of the kids have been enthusiastic and welcoming every time there’s a new baby. They were all disappointed, even the oldest who was probably 18 at the time, when the last pregnancy ended in miscarriage. The youngest wishes I’d have more babies so he can be a big brother. Had I been in a strong marriage, I would gladly have adopted more, even a sibling group. I still think about doing that on my own, but I’m not sure it’s fair to the child if there’s a two-parent family available.

That said, there are many wonderful things about having just one child, or just two, also. I believe i would also have been quite content with one or two.

There’s a great deal to be said for joyfully accepting what we are given, neither wishing for more, nor trying to avoid more.
 
holyrood said:
\ We have enough to have a choir, a jazz band, a softball team, build human pyramids, whatever.
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I bet unloading grocieries is awesome. My husband used to work on a boat and he says they would have a line of people from the van to the boat just throwing groceries at each other until they were all unloaded. I thought to myself, if only we have enough kids, we can make that happen right here!
 
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