Nuptial Mass - Kissing the Bride - Urgent

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FiliusDeiSum

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My fiancee and I are getting married this september, and I just realized that in the Missal there is no place in which the groom kisses the bride. I know this will break my fiancee’s heart if she doesn’t get that. Is there a place where this is/can be done? This is obviously my first TLM wedding.
 
FiliusDeiSum said:
My fiancee and I are getting married this september, and I just realized that in the Missal there is no place in which the groom kisses the bride. I know this will break my fiancee’s heart if she doesn’t get that. Is there a place where this is/can be done? This is obviously my first TLM wedding.
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Okay, never seen a TLM nuptual Mass, but I can’t imagine that it’s not going to happen. Why not ask the priest?
 
I found that page also, but then upon researching, it seemed that the Pax-Brede was only for solemn high mass, and we’re having a Missa Cantata due to the lack of a stable of deacons sitting around.
 
In that case, definitely ask the priest or you could even call someone from the Priestly Fraternity of St. Peter and consult them- they’re experts!
 
I know in our O.F. Nuptual Mass this past June, we kissed right at the end, right before the processional. Also, from what I’ve heard, when my grandparents were married in 1960 (obviously pre-Vatican II - I think it was a low Mass, though), it was the same thing. I think it’s just one of those things that, while not necessarily “in the Rubrics,” people just do.
 
JaMc said:
I think it’s just one of those things that, while not necessarily “in the Rubrics,” people just do.
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Good heavens, are you saying that there might actually be liturgical abuse in a EF Mass? :eek: 😃
 
Not that this is a good answer, but my parents were not allowed to kiss in the church. However, we are celebrating their 49th anniversary this week so maybe that was a good thing. 🙂
 
We were not married in the Catholic Church but had a traditional Anglican Wedding years ago. In those days the "you may kiss the bride " novelty was unknown. The Bride and Groom did not kiss in church.

Mind you, in those days marriages tended to last a lot longer.

Today we seem to always go for the instant gratification, waiting is something not favoured.
 
Kissing the bride is generally done after the dismissal (or at the EF, the Last Gospel, if read at a Nuptual Mass; some of the rubrics suggest it is not), or in any case, just before the recessional.

It’s never been a liturgical act, for crying out loud!
 
Interesting. I didn’t know this. Shows the power of Hollywood to affect our minds.

I get the impression people are going way overboard with weddings these days. Like having seven ‘groomsmen’ and seven bridesmaids, for example.
 
FiliusDeiSum said:
My fiancee and I are getting married this september, and I just realized that in the Missal there is no place in which the groom kisses the bride. I know this will break my fiancee’s heart if she doesn’t get that. Is there a place where this is/can be done? This is obviously my first TLM wedding.
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You are right – this is not part of the liturgy. If you were to do this, it seems that the most appropriate point would be after the Mass, just before you exit the church. If the priest who will be performing the ceremony has an issue with this, it would probably be that he doesn’t it confused with the official liturgy. If need be, you could even do it on the steps of the church, just as you exit the doors. Personally, I have not seen the first kiss done at any TLM weddings, but I don’t think there is any official rule against it. It would come down to the individual priest of the ceremony.
 
It would seem proper for it to be done after the recessional, on the steps outside.
 
Layman said:
Interesting. I didn’t know this. Shows the power of Hollywood to affect our minds.
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Same for the “unity candle.” The marriage IS the symbol of unity.
Layman said:
I get the impression people are going way overboard with weddings these days. Like having seven ‘groomsmen’ and seven bridesmaids, for example.
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Also, they have succumbed to the bridal industry marketing. "This is your WEDDING DAY! Why not make it special?" Problem is, it used to be that one had only one “wedding day.” Now a days many celebrate several “special” days.:eek:

Okay… back to on topic…
 
When I got married we weren’t sure whether we were allowed to kiss or not, it seems a bit weird to do something like that in God’s house, and with everyone watching too! After we had signed the register my husband asked the priest if it was ok to give me a kiss, Father laughed and said yes it is ok. He is a very traditional priest and to be honest i was quite surprised that he said yes.
 
We married in 1975 and there was no kiss allowed. A friend of mine married about a year before I did and I remembered her mother’s outraged protests to my mom “Have you ever heard anything more stupid – Fr. won’t allow them to kiss” so when I went to do my preparation it didn’t even come up. We didn’t have a Mass or even a Liturgy of the Word, just the exchange of consent and the blessing and exchanging of rings. It was over in minutes.

Personally, I just wish they’d all stick with the ritual as it’s written.
 
I was married in 1976 and we kissed. My sisters were married in 81 and 82 and they both kissed. I can remember weddings at which I sang in the 1960 where they kissed. We even have a photo from my parents’ wedding in 1949 where they’re kissing. Maybe it’s a local sort of thing. The only Catholic wedding I’ve attended some where else was in Chicago and they kissed. We’re a bunch of smoochers in the midwest!
 
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