Nuttiest Things Non-Catholics Have Said or Done Around You Because You're Catholic

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When driving home with two protestant friends, one guy was going off while reading tobit on his phone to himself. He pointed out while laughing to the other on how those “Crazy Catholics” had a book where “Tobit is attacked by a fish!”

I quickly reminded him of the book of Jonah.
 
I converted this year, I grew up Southern Baptist, my family was very shocked and confused on why Catholicism. They told me to make sure I could show the Church my W-2s because every year we have to turn them in so the church knows that we “tithe”, if we dont we aren’t allowed to go to church there.
 
Redbaron998 said:
I converted this year, I grew up Southern Baptist, my family was very shocked and confused on why Catholicism. They told me to make sure I could show the Church my W-2s because every year we have to turn them in so the church knows that we “tithe”, if we dont we aren’t allowed to go to church there.
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Be sure to remind them that you are Catholic…not Mormon.
 
TheRealJuliane said:
:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

I hope there’s a sliding scale depending on how BIG a sinner you are!

…, pay as you sin confession…

:rolleyes:
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Haven’t been in a confessional in a while…do they have credit card machines now, or do I have to stop at the ATM first!!!LOL!!!
 
Juliane, I started to read that article that you linked to, but it was making my stomach turn over. I think your response to the contractor’s wife was superb! 👍 Congratulations on showing such restraint. If someone sent me that article I could never have responded half so charitably.

I had a childhood friend once who, upon seeing my cross necklace, informed me that she knew that all Catholics absolutely had to wear a crucifix somewhere on their person at all times or else. I always wondered what the or else was? Did she think Vatican agents were going to come whisk me away to some medieval torture chamber, or that I would be struck by lightning?
 
sedonaman said:
Next time the opportunity presents itself, be sure to ask her if she had heard about all the gold and wine also hidden under the Vatican. 😛
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LOL :eek:
Yeah she’s already heard of all the gold and paintings and big churches etc!!!
 
maltmom;9409510 It’s an awesome thread isn’t it? [/QUOTE said:
:slapfight::tiphat:It’s pne of those “fun” threads.:where no slapfighting just everone laughing and hiving a good time.:grouphug:
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I have a good one. My mother is a fanatical irrational anti-catholic. The day I was to be confirmed I asked my mom to go with me to pick out a rosary. I told her that it is a tradition for neophytes to receive one on the day of their confirmation. She freaked out and told me she knew why I wanted one. She told me that upon confirmation I was going to go up to the altar and burn it in some arcane ceremony. I almost pissed myself I was laughing so hard. She didn’t appreciate that at all.
 
mikelionheart said:
Ha ha, brilliant.

“I should know, I’m Catholic.”

I hear this all the time from people who haven’t been to church for decades but still think they’re an expert on Catholicism.
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I’ve learned from them that missing Mass isn’t a sin, anything shy of murder isn’t a mortal sin, Confession isn’t necessary especially on a regular basis, you don’t need to go to Confession before receiving Communion after not going to Mass for years and with all manner of sin on your conscience, we’re not required to go to Mass every Sunday, the bread & wine are symbols, anywhere from 25-40% (or more) of priests have been accused or convicted of molesting altar boys, Vatican II “legalized” contraception, the Church approves of abortion in certain cases, the Church teaches us to live and let live (in regards to gay marriage), they only bedroom activities approved of by the Church are sleep and the missionary position (which is called that because that’s how nuns & priests do it), and that the Church created nuns because the priests didn’t like celibacy, among other things. They told me these things in all seriousness and either were taught them throughout their 12 years of Catholic school, or knew them because they’re things that “everybody” knows.

As far as non-Catholics go, I have a Lutheran friend who loves to talk to me about the Church’s teachings on contraception and family planning. She’s fond of telling me how unnatural it is (which I assume means contraception and sterilization would be natural) and how having more than 3-4 pregnancies can kill a woman, or at the very least shorten her life considerably. I actually convinced her that a couple points weren’t crazy, and even not-so-bad ideas, but overall she still thinks Catholics are nuts and that they truly teach that any sexual act that doesn’t end in conception is a sin.
 
TheRealJuliane said:
I did respond to my contractor’s wife who sent me the email including a link to a very anti-Catholic article…As a matter of fact, This one.

They are Jehovah Witness, but have never said a word to me about the Church. He has talked about why they do what they do, which I just politely listened to, and then ignored.

I responded thus:

Hi M,

Please give T my thanks for thinking of us, but I can recommend some books if he is interested in reading about the Catholic Church.

Hope you are both well!

Juliane

I think I did OK, what do you think?
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I tried the link but get a runtime error on it.
 
TheRealJuliane said:
I did respond to my contractor’s wife who sent me the email including a link to a very anti-Catholic article…As a matter of fact, This one.

They are Jehovah Witness, but have never said a word to me about the Church. He has talked about why they do what they do, which I just politely listened to, and then ignored.

I responded thus:

Hi M,

Please give T my thanks for thinking of us, but I can recommend some books if he is interested in reading about the Catholic Church.

Hope you are both well!

Juliane

I think I did OK, what do you think?
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No one does what you did. They think that they can convert Catholics at will but no one can convert them.
Once I discussed a tiny little bit with of them because I challenged their assertion that the name of God MUST be Yeowah. Boy, they said I was joking with them for IT IS EVIDENT that it is Yeowah and not God…!!!
Good move…
 
Acerunner said:
I have a good one. My mother is a fanatical irrational anti-catholic. The day I was to be confirmed I asked my mom to go with me to pick out a rosary. I told her that it is a tradition for neophytes to receive one on the day of their confirmation. She freaked out and told me she knew why I wanted one. She told me that upon confirmation I was going to go up to the altar and burn it in some arcane ceremony. I almost pissed myself I was laughing so hard. She didn’t appreciate that at all.
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May be the best one so far!!!

God Bless your Mother

DLG
 
Once told someone I belonged to the Roman Catholic Church, they said they were Christians, because they didn’t like having to go to a different church every week (they obviously were hearing, Roamin’ Catholic)!
 
adrift said:
I tried the link but get a runtime error on it.
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It’s a PDF link. Just the usual stuff - priest are pedophiles, the Pope is corrupt, blah blah blah. We demand that the Church give back all its property immediately and stop being a country…blah blah blah…
 
People who know I am religious tend to think everything I do is related to a rule. If I don’t drink alcohol, they think I’m following a rule. It just doesn’t occur to them that I just choose to not drink because I don’t enjoy it. Another time someone at work was selling raffle tickets. I just didn’t feel like buying any so I declined. Another coworker explained to everyone present, “she’s religious, so she’s not allowed to gamble.” So the pattern that I see is that people tend to think Catholics are supposed to blindly follow a bunch of rules and that we’re not supposed to think or make decisions for ourselves.
 
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