O
OCPD_Poster
Guest
I am a long time lurker on CAF.
Having been recently diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) and having taken medications for it for approximately 6 weeks I have come to the following conclusions, given that these conclusions are fluid and still continue formed and defined.
The Rosary and The Divine Mercy Chaplet
I was a 5 to 7 day a week pray-er of the Rosary and the DMC for several years. The systematic counting of the prescribed prayers on the beads was (and still is) soothing. Since there are natural breaks in the beads with links of chain my mind did not have to focus on the counting. Counting things for me having OCPD is an obsession. I frequently used to count my steps coming and going to various places. Like from my car to my office at work. The hum of the prescribed prayers provided a well defined system that also brought order to my prayer life. This order provides my mind freedom. I don’t have to organize the prayer, it is already done. Having these tools allows my OCPD mind to open to full meditation upon the various mysteries of Christ’s earthly ministry.
I believe this to be prayer: The opening of ones mind to God where earthly distractions are minimized in order to be open to hear the Holy Spirit, and or open to being in the sacramental presence of our God in order to bring Him glory, and offer thankfulness, and praise.
The Liturgy of the Word and the Liturgy of the Eucharist
Structure and order are paramount to my OCPD mind. Sacred Scripture affirms that God is a God of order and not chaos. In my mind order brings peace, or at least it sets the stage where peace can settle if I allow it to. The liturgies in the Mass follow a set repeating pattern of order and discipline and thus I allow the peace of Christ to settle within as I participate in the ordered and well structured Mass.
Relational Discipleship
My OCPD mind is selfish. I must do this; I must do that, to ensure a structure and order to my personal space and universe. This selfish mind is antithetical to the Law of Love given to us by Christ. It does not allow for a genuine absorbing of another person and who they are in the Body of Christ or who they are as a potential believer and follower of Christ if they have yet to heed His call in their life. This perhaps has been the most difficult challenge in my personal spiritual walk to date. I have hidden from it by overly emphasizing an intellectual pursuit of Christianity though the study of the history of the development of Christian doctrine and theology. This focus has regrettably further cemented my predisposed judgmental thinking into an “Us vr. Them” mentality based upon what people think and believe and how that aligns itself with what doctrine has developed over time and has been handed down to faithful Catholics as teachings from the Apostolic See of Rome. For me this has been damaging. I do not edify the Church nor build up the body of Christ with this action or mindset and it must change. I believe that I now have the tools, or are obtaining the tools and learning the use of them, to allow this change that must come from the Spirit of Truth. All the knowledge of Christian theology does not take a tuna casserole over to your next door neighbor when he’s sick. Knowing the beautiful history of the Christian Creeds does not move the body to act out of sacrificial love. That comes from a different place, a different source.
The Presence of Christ
Catholics believe, and with good reason, in the Sacramental presence of Christ in the Eucharist. However, I personally believe this core and central theme in Catholicism has lead to the “wrong execution of the right idea” as seen in the over emphasis on the consecrated Host. The seemingly endless dialogue and subsequent conflict of ideas and opinions in an attempt to bring unity within the Catholic community on the proper posture and method of reception of Christ in Holy Communion is an example of this point. The idea that we as humans must in every way humanly possible guard and protect God in the consecrated Host reverses the roles of God and man. It is man that requires Divine protection, not the other way around. It is an often repeated Catholic argument to state that God chooses to bind Himself to the Sacraments but God Himself is not bound by them. I find this argument to ring true and therefore, if God is offended by sacrilegious events surround a consecrated Host, can He not withdraw His grace and even His presence from it if He so chooses? I believe He can and does. This in no way is to be taken as a lackadaisical attitude toward the Holy, but a more practical way of viewing what is and is not.
Sacred Scripture tells us that God inhabits the praises of His people. I believe God to be present Sacramentally in those praises. Therefore, praise of God should be central to Worship. This praise can and does take many forms and is not isolated to a single form or style. Worship is communal prayer. If my definition of prayer above as: The opening of ones mind to God where earthly distractions are minimized in order to be open to hear the Holy Spirit, and or open to being in the sacramental presence of our God in order to bring Him glory, and offer thankfulness, and praise is true for an individual then all the more when two or three or five thousand are gathered together in His Name.
(continued on next post)
Having been recently diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) and having taken medications for it for approximately 6 weeks I have come to the following conclusions, given that these conclusions are fluid and still continue formed and defined.
The Rosary and The Divine Mercy Chaplet
I was a 5 to 7 day a week pray-er of the Rosary and the DMC for several years. The systematic counting of the prescribed prayers on the beads was (and still is) soothing. Since there are natural breaks in the beads with links of chain my mind did not have to focus on the counting. Counting things for me having OCPD is an obsession. I frequently used to count my steps coming and going to various places. Like from my car to my office at work. The hum of the prescribed prayers provided a well defined system that also brought order to my prayer life. This order provides my mind freedom. I don’t have to organize the prayer, it is already done. Having these tools allows my OCPD mind to open to full meditation upon the various mysteries of Christ’s earthly ministry.
I believe this to be prayer: The opening of ones mind to God where earthly distractions are minimized in order to be open to hear the Holy Spirit, and or open to being in the sacramental presence of our God in order to bring Him glory, and offer thankfulness, and praise.
The Liturgy of the Word and the Liturgy of the Eucharist
Structure and order are paramount to my OCPD mind. Sacred Scripture affirms that God is a God of order and not chaos. In my mind order brings peace, or at least it sets the stage where peace can settle if I allow it to. The liturgies in the Mass follow a set repeating pattern of order and discipline and thus I allow the peace of Christ to settle within as I participate in the ordered and well structured Mass.
Relational Discipleship
My OCPD mind is selfish. I must do this; I must do that, to ensure a structure and order to my personal space and universe. This selfish mind is antithetical to the Law of Love given to us by Christ. It does not allow for a genuine absorbing of another person and who they are in the Body of Christ or who they are as a potential believer and follower of Christ if they have yet to heed His call in their life. This perhaps has been the most difficult challenge in my personal spiritual walk to date. I have hidden from it by overly emphasizing an intellectual pursuit of Christianity though the study of the history of the development of Christian doctrine and theology. This focus has regrettably further cemented my predisposed judgmental thinking into an “Us vr. Them” mentality based upon what people think and believe and how that aligns itself with what doctrine has developed over time and has been handed down to faithful Catholics as teachings from the Apostolic See of Rome. For me this has been damaging. I do not edify the Church nor build up the body of Christ with this action or mindset and it must change. I believe that I now have the tools, or are obtaining the tools and learning the use of them, to allow this change that must come from the Spirit of Truth. All the knowledge of Christian theology does not take a tuna casserole over to your next door neighbor when he’s sick. Knowing the beautiful history of the Christian Creeds does not move the body to act out of sacrificial love. That comes from a different place, a different source.
The Presence of Christ
Catholics believe, and with good reason, in the Sacramental presence of Christ in the Eucharist. However, I personally believe this core and central theme in Catholicism has lead to the “wrong execution of the right idea” as seen in the over emphasis on the consecrated Host. The seemingly endless dialogue and subsequent conflict of ideas and opinions in an attempt to bring unity within the Catholic community on the proper posture and method of reception of Christ in Holy Communion is an example of this point. The idea that we as humans must in every way humanly possible guard and protect God in the consecrated Host reverses the roles of God and man. It is man that requires Divine protection, not the other way around. It is an often repeated Catholic argument to state that God chooses to bind Himself to the Sacraments but God Himself is not bound by them. I find this argument to ring true and therefore, if God is offended by sacrilegious events surround a consecrated Host, can He not withdraw His grace and even His presence from it if He so chooses? I believe He can and does. This in no way is to be taken as a lackadaisical attitude toward the Holy, but a more practical way of viewing what is and is not.
Sacred Scripture tells us that God inhabits the praises of His people. I believe God to be present Sacramentally in those praises. Therefore, praise of God should be central to Worship. This praise can and does take many forms and is not isolated to a single form or style. Worship is communal prayer. If my definition of prayer above as: The opening of ones mind to God where earthly distractions are minimized in order to be open to hear the Holy Spirit, and or open to being in the sacramental presence of our God in order to bring Him glory, and offer thankfulness, and praise is true for an individual then all the more when two or three or five thousand are gathered together in His Name.
(continued on next post)