Odd baptism

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stanthonyserver

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I attended the baptism of my great-nephew yesterday. The pastor choose to perform it after the Mass so it was a separate ceremony.

He was a very nice priest but throughout the ceremony he would apologize and make depracating statements like “Here’s another long prayer” or “I know this takes a long time” and then just before he poured the water he said “OK get ready for the screaming” and other odd jokes and comments.

I consider both of our families to be devout catholics and we knew the responses and all. None of us were in a hurry and no one was complaining in the least.

Afterwards we talked of course and most of us thought his comments trivialized the ceremony and were inappropriate. I’m not sure what to do at this point as we were at a church I’m not familiar with and I do not know the priest personnaly.

Just thought it very odd.😦
David
 
stanthonyserver said:
I attended the baptism of my great-nephew yesterday. The pastor choose to perform it after the Mass so it was a separate ceremony.

He was a very nice priest but throughout the ceremony he would apologize and make depracating statements like “Here’s another long prayer” or “I know this takes a long time” and then just before he poured the water he said “OK get ready for the screaming” and other odd jokes and comments.

I consider both of our families to be devout catholics and we knew the responses and all. None of us were in a hurry and no one was complaining in the least.

Afterwards we talked of course and most of us thought his comments trivialized the ceremony and were inappropriate. I’m not sure what to do at this point as we were at a church I’m not familiar with and I do not know the priest personnaly.

Just thought it very odd.😦
David
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It sounds as though the priest was embarassed by the Liturgy. Please note that I don’t mean that he was in a nasty or sinister way, but that he was on a very real emotional level. I can understand this as someone who struggles with “confrontation.” For example, I used to work at a store and on occassion had to supervise meetings of the staff. Rather than simply go over the material as provided, I would often point out how I didn’t like the material, or how I thought the meeting was silly or whatnot, because I thought that the staff probably would believe those things and did not want them to think that they were really my idea.

In a similar (but not the same) way, perhaps the priest, knowing how many people probably unfortunately do find the baptismal prayers too long or think the entire ritual is cruel to the child in some way, said these things because he felt uncomfortable with the “confrontation” of subjecting the people to something they didn’t like.

If that’s the case, he may well think that the rite of baptism is wonderful, but have a powerful emotional embarassment, or fear, of the people which prevents him from acting as though he does. If this is the case, I would suggest that A) he needs to find a way to get over it for the sake of Christ, and B) let people not be too harsh on him as I can say from personal experience that such emotions can at times be so strong as to be literally debilitating. You can’t understand it until you’ve been through it. If this is the case, he still needs to get over it, but he may not even be culpable of it before God, so strong can emotions be, and he may feel awful about it and certainly needs prayerful support.

On the other hand, maybe he has no such problems and he personally dislikes the rite and decided to comment on it to express his disapproval, or perhaps he does not dislike the rite ut thought that adding humor to the rite would be a good thing. In these cases, he also needs the support of prayers that he may change his heart.

So in any case, it would seem he needs be prayed for. 🙂
 
We have a priest in our diocese who incorporates local cultural humor in most everything. He does so to put people at comfort and to teach them in a comfortable manner they can relate to. At the same time he is very reverant.
 
An observation I have made in my own church - there are plenty of baptisms, but we never recognize the parents of the baby being baptised as people who actually go to church there regularly. I suspect that a very large percentage of baptisms are done for families who are nominally catholic - they want to “get the sacraments,” but they are ignorant of, and impatient with the process/rituals etc… It wouldn’t surprise me if the priest in question is simply used to most baptism attendees being impatient and even complaining. Perhaps he is a self-conscious enough person that he feels the need to apologize in advance for fear of taking alot of criticism otherwise. I prefer it when a priest isn’t apologetic, but I would’t assume that he meant to trivialize the sacrament. My assumption would be more that he made an assumption about you the guests, which made him uncomfortable. I wouldn’t do anything about it other than prayer for him and his parish.
 
We have a very new and young priest in our parish cluster who might do this. He often inserts small, funny asides–esp if he’s just made a mistake 😛 He may still be learning the rite thoroughly himself…for instance, our youngest and another baby were this priest’s first official baptism-- during a Mass, no less. He was nervous, it took forever, and he kept having to refer to the book to get the right order of prayers and events. He’s still learning. It was beautiful and moving, though. So, it may be a character trait, he could be a young priest (or an old priest), he could have been nervous, perhaps people have complained that the ceremony was too long, who knows? I’d say give the benefit of the doubt, offer a prayer for the priest and ALL priests and let it go at that 😉
 
Priests are human, and are all very different. I have attended several Masses, celebrated by the elderly, former Pastor of our parish. He fills in, from time to time. And he always “punctuates” the Mass… with explanations of what he’s doing and why. Sometimes, making humorous little remarks. This usually extends the length of the Mass by a few minutes, at least.

I’ve always kind of viewed it… that he feels very fatherly toward the people. And he uses the Mass, to teach us… as he goes along. He’s like a grandfather… teaching the little ones.

From what you describe, the priest at your great-nephews Baptism… seemed (to me, anyway) to sort of be doing the same thing. Explaining what he’s doing. But maybe he should have kept the length of the prayers comments out.

It’s a shame, if it was upsetting to you and your family. I’m sorry for that. But your precious nephew was Baptized… praise God!
 
Thank you all for your insights. I can’t say we were upset just a little confused.

As I reflect I think several of you hit the nail on the head.
  1. I think this priest is not the most comfortable public speaker and felt self conscious during the ceremony. So he was trying to ‘lighten’ the mood - not a sin surely.
  2. I am certain that in the past he as had groups come in who - shall we say - were less in tune with the joyful solemnity of the moment. He probably has had to deal with that many times.
And as you say - my great nephew is now baptised in Christ and that is the important thing. Thank you for setting my mind at ease.

David
 
When I do baptisms I explain the rite as I go through it since many of the people have never seen a baptism before and, frankly, most of the time I do not recognize the parents of the child being baptized. I never comment on the length of the prayers – they are what they are.

Deacon Ed
 
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