Offering each other the sign of peace

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Is the sign of peace on its way out? At different parishes in my diocese, priests are omitting the “Let us offer each other the sign of peace” sentence in the mass.(and I am in a ‘liberal’ diocese)

Since the rubric says “Then, if appropriate, the Deacon or the Priest, adds: “Let us offer each other the sign of peace”” I assume the sign of peace is not mandatory.

Has anyone else noticed priests dropping the sign of peace from the mass?

I for one, tend to be very emotional at mass and by the time the sign of peace comes I am often a wreck, even though I fight against the emotion. My face and hands are a mess with tears, a runny nose and dirty tissue and I do not want to spread that to others with a handshake. I try not to shake hands for the others’ sakes - which can be perceived as not loving or as aloof…

I would just as soon see the sign of peace be removed entirely from practice. We are already being united as one when we receive the Eucharist - a handshake cannot make us closer than that. Or am I missing something?
 
anon64350612 said:
Is the sign of peace on its way out? At different parishes in my diocese, priests are omitting the “Let us offer each other the sign of peace” sentence in the mass.(and I am in a ‘liberal’ diocese)

Since the rubric says “Then, if appropriate, the Deacon or the Priest, adds: “Let us offer each other the sign of peace”” I assume the sign of peace is not mandatory.

Has anyone else noticed priests dropping the sign of peace from the mass?

I for one, tend to be very emotional at mass and by the time the sign of peace comes I am often a wreck, even though I fight against the emotion. My face and hands are a mess with tears, a runny nose and dirty tissue and I do not want to spread that to others with a handshake. I try not to shake hands for the others’ sakes - which can be perceived as not loving or as aloof…

I would just as soon see the sign of peace be removed entirely from practice. We are already being united as one when we receive the Eucharist - a handshake cannot make us closer than that. Or am I missing something?
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I don’t know if it’s on its way out or not. We still do it in our parish.
 
M-Dent said:
It’s the norm but optional.
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Frankly, I wish my parish would do away with it. I’m uncomfortable talking to strangers and especially, with my OCD, often have to get out my hand sanitizer afterward. Then I worry I may be offending someone by sanitizing my hands.
 
Faith1960 said:
Frankly, I wish my parish would do away with it. I’m uncomfortable talking to strangers and especially, with my OCD, often have to get out my hand sanitizer afterward. Then I worry I may be offending someone by sanitizing my hands.
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The parish my family belongs does not shake hands. It can be quite disruptive in a very large Church. Some parishioners nod at one another and a few still shake hands w/ family members - but it’s very solemn, as intended.
 
I’m waiting (and hoping) for our priest to drop it. He’s cut the time for the handshaking down a lot - the overly-friendly types now have no time to wander down the aisle shaking the hands of everyone.
 
anon64350612 said:
Is the sign of peace on its way out? At different parishes in my diocese, priests are omitting the “Let us offer each other the sign of peace” sentence in the mass.(and I am in a ‘liberal’ diocese)

Since the rubric says “Then, if appropriate, the Deacon or the Priest, adds: “Let us offer each other the sign of peace”” I assume the sign of peace is not mandatory.

Has anyone else noticed priests dropping the sign of peace from the mass?

I for one, tend to be very emotional at mass and by the time the sign of peace comes I am often a wreck, even though I fight against the emotion. My face and hands are a mess with tears, a runny nose and dirty tissue and I do not want to spread that to others with a handshake. I try not to shake hands for the others’ sakes - which can be perceived as not loving or as aloof…

I would just as soon see the sign of peace be removed entirely from practice. We are already being united as one when we receive the Eucharist - a handshake cannot make us closer than that. Or am I missing something?
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It is entirely optional to add it.

Personally, I stopped doing it years ago (more than a decade at least).

I don’t know if there are any reliable statistics on this, but I do notice a trend among younger priests who likewise choose not to add it. That’s just my limited observations, and it could be coincidental, yet I do see the pattern.
 
M-Dent said:
The parish my family belongs does not shake hands. It can be quite disruptive in a very large Church. Some parishioners nod at one another and a few still shake hands w/ family members - but it’s very solemn, as intended.
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We have a fairly large parish, 2000+ families, but they still do it. I don’t think it’s disruptive, it just makes me feel uncomfortable, though I’m better about it than I used to be.
 
We shake hands at my parish, and at all the churches I’ve been to in the region. I’m also uncomfortable with it – I’m a singer, and touching other people during cold and flu season is a bad idea. If I get sick I can’t work!

When I started going back to church several years ago, I noticed a significant increase in the amount of time I spent ill during the cold season. Since I avoid the chalice in the winter because of germs, and church is the only place I am around sick people, I attribute this to the hand shaking. There once was a woman who spent the whole Mass coughing and blowing her nose into a crushed tissue in her right hand, so when the Sign of Peace came, I folded my hands in front of me and bowed to her. She gave me a look that could have killed me, if looks could do such things. Now I bring hand sanitizer and use it. If it offends someone… well… okay then.

I would not mind in the least bit if my parish did away with this, though I do like that it occasionally gives me a moment to compliment a stranger and make her smile. 🙂
 
A few weeks ago at mass Father announced that the cold and flu season coming, that we should just nod and say “peace be with you” instead of shaking hands. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.
 
I find it extremely disruptive given its proximity to Communion, and I believe it should just be eliminated outright.

IF they really want it, then it’s better placed at the Offertory.

But I’d rather see it gone. As in not even optional. Gone. Banned. Abolished. Disintegrated. On pain of death.

“Pax Domini” and its response should be sufficient.
 
I wouldn’t be sad to see it go either, but I highly doubt that it will ever be omitted in my parish. I didn’t actually know that it was optional until I read this thread, so I learned something today.
 
In my previous parish it was a nightmare. People running all over the church giving hugs, and chatting (seriously chatting). At my current parish it is far more reverent, just giving the sign of peace to those around us.

I too wouldn’t mind it being gone.
 
honestly, I am glad when at least one my parish priests don’t do it during the winter…e.g. If I am getting over a cold, I don’t want to shake hands unless I have my sanitizer spray with me. If my dad has a cold, he does not shake hands, just nods.

I’d be okay if it was done away with completely

.
 
It’s not my favorite part, but it did force me to face and overcome anxiety about literally reaching out to strangers.
So I’m glad for that. 🙂
 
I’m assuming you are talking about the OF Mass. I haven’t been to one in several years. I attend the EF Mass. The “sign of peace” is offered only during a Solemn High Mass and then only between the Priest/Deacon and Deacon/Sub Deacon. It stays in the Sanctuary. It does not exist in the Low Mass, or Sung High Mass.
 
MrsAngelala said:
We shake hands at my parish, and at all the churches I’ve been to in the region. I’m also uncomfortable with it – I’m a singer, and touching other people during cold and flu season is a bad idea. If I get sick I can’t work!

When I started going back to church several years ago, I noticed a significant increase in the amount of time I spent ill during the cold season. Since I avoid the chalice in the winter because of germs, and church is the only place I am around sick people, I attribute this to the hand shaking. There once was a woman who spent the whole Mass coughing and blowing her nose into a crushed tissue in her right hand, so when the Sign of Peace came, I folded my hands in front of me and bowed to her. She gave me a look that could have killed me, if looks could do such things. Now I bring hand sanitizer and use it. If it offends someone… well… okay then.

I would not mind in the least bit if my parish did away with this, though I do like that it occasionally gives me a moment to compliment a stranger and make her smile. 🙂
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As a singer, I have the exact same issues and concerns. I have even moved, during Mass, to avoid those with colds. I’m not trying to make anyone uncomfortable…but I have a family to support. Too many people cough into their hands or touch their noses and then want to shake hands. And, what’s worse, our parish has taken to having everyone greet each other before the Mass begins and then again at the Sign of Peace. I wish they’d stop that. And, I wish the Sign of Peace was consistently just a nod or a proper hand gesture rather than a handshake. Nowhere does it say that the Sign of Peace has to be a handshake.
 
It happens at our parish occasionally, but it is mostly gone, thank heaven. I don’t think “peace”, I think “Let’s all pass every germ possible around the entire congregation.”
 
I would rather not have a handshake at the Sign of Peace and do a “Japanese style bow” (am not Japanese) or a nod; however, I will shake hand with an elderly person who may need a slight human touch. What I do is to use the hand sanitizer (without hiding my action, but not making “a show” of it either) just before extending my hand. My hand could still be slightly humid (it feels cold) from the sanitizer, but the source is obvious. I sure do not want to derail this thread, but what about the hymnal? It might not be very germ-free. I am not going to look up how long Germ/Bacteria X lives on Y :).

The bottom line: I try to follow the golden rule and if I have the sniffles I do not get too close to people - specially the elderly (there are plenty of empty pews where I may sit). At times I have told the person I have a cold and do not shake hand. If I have the flu, I stay home.

Luz María
 
Luz_Maria said:
I would rather not have a handshake at the Sign of Peace and do a “Japanese style bow” (am not Japanese) or a nod; however, I will shake hand with an elderly person who may need a slight human touch.
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I wish we would go to a bow or nod, too. While I’m a bit germophobic, the biggest problem for me is hand pain. It’s not as bad as it used to be, but an overly firm grip can still be unpleasant. I usually remember to offer my left hand, which isn’t as sensitive, but sometimes I forget. Because I’m very aware of the possibility of hand pain for anyone, no matter what age, I offer a pretty limp handshake. 😉
 
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