Ok so...

[AlterBridgeFan]

I figured this would be the best place too post my question it would appear that my girlfriend is a Wiccan and I am a Catholic. As of now we don’t talk aboout eachother religions and we really don’t seem to have any plans to. I’m a pretty open minded guy. I don’t care what other people believe in and I certainly don’t hate anyone, and I also have no plans of ever changing my faith. BUT I do really like this girl. We havn’t been going out for very long, and basicly it kind of odd dating a “Witch”, we have very different beliefs. So if yall could give me anything on what yoou guys think, much appreciated im sry if I posted this in the wrong place, im not new to forums but im not in the mood to look for the right place.

 

[jakasaki]

Hi there & welcome to CAF…

Do you mind stating your age as well as your girlfriends age…???

Also you state that you haven’t been going out for “too long”…

How long is not “too long”…???

 

[AlterBridgeFan]

17 and 17 and about six months, my sister says its too soon to be worried about it but I just want to see some other oppinions on it.

And thanks for the welcome btw.

 

[Trishie]

If you plan to get married and have children you won’t be able to ignore or be nonchalant about the religion or beliefs of your wife unless you wish to place your children’s souls in grave danger. Your differing beliefs will be a huge issue then.

God bless you

 

[AlterBridgeFan]

“If you plan to get married and have children you won’t be able to ignore or be nonchalant about the religion or beliefs of your wife unless you wish to place your children’s souls in grave danger. Your differing beliefs will be a huge issue then.”

Yes this is on my mind too. I do understand this.

 

[jakasaki]

“If you plan to get married and have children you won’t be able to ignore or be nonchalant about the religion or beliefs of your wife unless you wish to place your children’s souls in grave danger. Your differing beliefs will be a huge issue then.”

Yes this is on my mind too. I do understand this.

You dont have to copy & paste the posters reply… just click on the “QUOTE” button and then right under the last -quote- start typing away… !!!

 

[AlterBridgeFan]

Ha ha no problem usualy the forums i am on are crazy with the replys so its just easier to do that.

But back to the issue, all of my catholic friends are saying break up … but i just cant do that

 

[Trishie]

I’m sorry you are in such a painful position.
However, if you continue with the relationship to the obvious conclusion, you are likely to have many years of pain and regret.
Marriage doesn’t just remain, 'we like each other" or 'we like each other very much" or we are enormously attracted" it becomes, hard, at times boring, at times very painful and lonely, and full of anger if basic differences are deep. Attraction and liking are easy casualties of major belief differences especially where the children’s welfare is concerned.

I feel for you as I realize how strong emotional attachments are. I hope and pray that your decisions will be in the best interests of your soul and others, and that if you do leave the relationship, God will provide both strength and consolation, and a lovely Catholic woman.
God bless you Love

 

[AlterBridgeFan]

Ah yes, you are unfortuatly right so i figure we will have to have a long hard conversation about this and explain my side, I don’t want to make her give up her faith, if she truly doesn’t want to and I do understand that same faith is VERY important in a relationship.

 

[Barbkw]

Was she a Christian who gave up belief in Christ?

How many years has she been in a Wiccan coven?

 

[if_youCthispray]

Ah yes, you are unfortuatly right so i figure we will have to have a long hard conversation about this and explain my side, I don’t want to make her give up her faith, if she truly doesn’t want to and I do understand that same faith is VERY important in a relationship.

well you should want her to give up her faith. If you truly care for her you would want her to have eternal salvation your best bet at that is by following the True Faith.

 

[heathernoel]

Ah!! Ok. Let me share my story and you can see where I’m going.

My husband is a non confirmed Catholic who believes, but doesn’t see the need to go to church. I have found my way to the Church and so have my children.

It makes it SO hard on me because we are intimate in every other way…but this MAJOR thing…Church. It breaks my heart. I act like it’s all ok, but it’s not. I’m finally being confirmed after his marital issues are being dealt with…but it’s still a source of separation. I pray for his conversion.

I wish we were praying together for someone else’s conversion.

Don’t put yourself in this spot. I love him, but this hurts.

 

[AlterBridgeFan]

Was she a Christian who gave up belief in Christ?

How many years has she been in a Wiccan coven?

Born Wiccan I believe.

well you should want her to give up her faith. If you truly care for her you would want her to have eternal salvation your best bet at that is by following the True Faith.

This is a good point…

Don’t put yourself in this spot. I love him, but this hurts.

This is also another very good point. And this is what I’m afraid of. I don’t want her in that situation, but at the same time all I want to do is try and make this work. You both have good spirated ideas. And I thank you for your responses.

 

[rdscheirer]

You are 17 and the girl is 17- are you living in 1888 that you think 17 is a good age to consider marriage?Hopefully you are grounded in your faith but she could change her mind anytime. What are you doing for college (and her) to prepare yourself. You can what if it to death but the real issue is right now I think you are too young to consider marriage- friend of my daughter in 11th grade wants to marry her boyfriend , but boyfriend was sent to live with Dad because he quit school-so now he’s far away. Guess what- girl is smart and going to college- boy is High school dropout with no future- girl has decided she will wait till college and maybe meet someone who can be what they want in a spouse. If you can commit to eachother for marriage you must put the marriage first and your needs second- married for 27 years so I have a little street cred to offer advice for you.

 

[AlterBridgeFan]

You can what if it to death but the real issue is right now I think you are too young to consider marriage- friend of my daughter in 11th grade wants to marry her boyfriend , you must put the marriage first and your needs second- married for 27 years so I have a little street cred to offer advice for you.

Always seems to be me with the what-ifing . And yes it does come first. But being under pressure from my catholic frinds is un-nerving. And yes this is pretty young my sister keep sayin too stop thinkin about it.

 

[Barbkw]

Wiccan’s won’t admit that their “religion” is occult. They are so blind to Truth and full of their own pride that they see only their own physical pleasures of the world. Satan leads them, whereever he needs them.

The Wiccan women I’ve spoken with were all raised Christians, but due to their sexual sins, their radical feminism, their prodeath stance toward inconvenient children, and their acceptance of female on female / male on male sexual acts, they’ve felt forced to give up all connection with Christ and instead embrace the old Greek and Roman goddesses.

If there is one (male) god that they pray to, it is Pan. By the way, when Jesus and the Apostles were at Caesarea Phillippi, and Jesus renamed Simon to Kepha - Rock (Peter in Greek) they were at an ancient worship site to the god Pan.

Wiccans radically reject the Divinity of Christ, to them he is only a good teacher, a man, nothing more. They deny the virgin birth and most especially they deny the Resurrection.

Wiccans have a creed (Rede) in their church and it reads:“Harm none, do as ye will.”

In actually, the “harm none” statement does not apply to the unborn. With Wicca women, animals and even trees have more rights than do the inconvenient or handicapped unborn.

 

[oneGODoneCHURCH]

I dont’t know that at this point you are even looking at the possibility of marriage. At 17 is is more than likly that you are not and even more that you should not. Then agian you should not really be dating anyone that you do not think you could marry and that is what dating is for is moving toward marriage. In the case of you and this girl, I would say stop this right away. We are not talking about a marriage of christains from different denomiations, That is hard from the get go and when you bring children into it getts more difficult as no matter what is said prior to the marriage about the raiseing of the child it changes when the child gets here.

I your case we are talking about some one that believes in gods, that your Faith tells you ae not real. See a problem starting to grow?

 

[AlterBridgeFan]

Yes, indeed. But its so odd I mean I just read the part about what a Wicaan believes. And its strange because I am very conservative republican and obviously a different religion. I was born Catholic and am a very staunch and well known republican in the area. Putting us as Poler opposites.

Which leads me to ask than why she likes me so much. unless I believe it was mentioned that Wicaans follow their own desires. But i never exactly got the feeling that I was being used. Hmm… Im starting to understand what ultimately is going to have to be done.

 

[esac]

Always seems to be me with the what-ifing . And yes it does come first. But being under pressure from my catholic frinds is un-nerving. And yes this is pretty young my sister keep sayin too stop thinkin about it.

The more time you spend with the wrong person, the less time you’ll spend with the right one…

Ahh, to be 17 again.

It’s good that you are questioning this life experience. Years down the road you’ll look back and know why things happened the way they did. Why God would put someone in your life that isn’t even christian. OR why God would put YOU in that someone’s life. I certainly don’t have an answer. There are alot of “what ifs” at 17, and that may never go way as you get older. You want those questions answered, so that you may know what direction to take.

I think you should put your faith in God, that His will be done for your life. Pray for guidance and faith, so that you may put your trust in Him first and foremost. Your friends won’t have THE answer for you, and your sister wants the best for you. Everytime you start questioning your life, pray, pray, pray. Pray for others. In this case, pray for your girlfriend that God may guide you both during this confusing time in your lives.

Just honest advice for a young man…Don’t be in such a hurry to get married. If it’s God’s will, it will just happen without you even trying.

 

[The_GreyPilgrim]

In short I’ll give you this answer: yes and no.

If that doesn’t satisfy, here’s the long one.

I got my-then-girlfriend pregnant at 18 after dating for a year. She was raised Catholic and I was an atheist. We got married that same year and I was a horrible husband. I was a 20 year-old father who was terrified and didn’t want any of it. I was angry and I took everything out on her.

But being the child of divorced parents I didn’t want my children to grow up the way I did. So we stayed together. Eventually I began to grow up and grow out of my stupidity.

By the time my third child was born I was a rather indifferent/agnostic and beginning to look into the eastern philosophies. My wife wanted to have our children baptized. I didn’t care and I thought that some kind of structure was better than nothing.

After a long journey I was baptized into the Church four years after my children were.

The point that I’m trying to make is that I wouldn’t advise anyone to attach themselves to someone who isn’t “equally yoked”, that is of different faiths. A relationship is hard enough to build with someone who does share the same faith. I treated my wife terribly, and yet she endured it and loved me in spite of it. Many marriges end because of this very thing. If she’s not willing to even discuss the matter, if she’s not willing to be open with you about this fundamental thing, then this is a sign to me of a underlying mistrust. She’s afraid that you won’t understand or that you’ll try to force her away from something that she holds dear. This mistrust and insecurity may (and will) be ever pervasive in any discussion that you two will have.

But I also believe that God gave me to her as a gift so that seeing her love and patience that I may catch a glimpse of His love and patience for me. He gave her to me so that through her He would save me. Without her who knows where I would be. It may be that God is giving her to you for the same reason. It that case I would do as St. Francis did, “preach the gospel at all times, and when necessary use words.”

If you really care for this girl, I wouldn’t necessarily advise you to really start discussions out-of-the-blue. Rather just be there when she needs you to. Be loving and understanding. Invite her to Mass every once in a while. She doesn’t even have to participate, she can just sit and listen. If she wants to talk about something, then talk. If she’s got questions answer them to the best of your knowledge. If you don’t know something, say so; don’t wing it! Read and learn your faith. Peter Kreeft’s “Handbook of Christian Apologetics” is a good place to start.

More than anything when things are going rough, and if you really care about her, you tell her that you’re not leaving her no matter what. That may put her insecurities to rest and open new channels of dialogue.

Most of all pray for her always. Monica prayed every day for Augustine while he was a Manichean.

Bottom line is that if God wants you to to be together, He will make sure that it happens. If not, then it won’t.