In general lying is not good. With that said, have you tried commenting on certain things you like and dislike? It would seem to me that would be both honest with the inclusion of positivity.
“Gee, Mary, I think you look beautiful!”
Dont lie, but it is better to tell her indirectly that it actually doesnt fit by saying,“it is a nice dress, but i do think that the other one fits you much better.” Something like this. In this way, it is less offending.
This, but with one caveat: only if she can easily change clothes, that is she hasn’t left the house yet. Beyond that, Gorgias’ answer is perfect.
Yes.
Hi Kateri92,
As a general rule, if someone asks how they look they aren’t looking for a critique of their outfit (unless they’re trying stuff on at home or at a store). They’re looking for assurance. This is not the time for brutal honesty but for kindness. Keep a couple of key phrases in mind for times like this so you can reassure without lying.
The funny thing is that she was getting ready to go out and seemed like she wanted real feedback on how her outfit looked. I wish I didn’t have to answer.
If she was just getting ready and I thought her outfit was mismatched I would have said so. Probably something like Hmm, maybe another top would work better.
I think “Not entitled to know” applies here. I read in a Catholic book somewhere (a long time ago, so I don’t remember the reference) that “No” in this case means “She’s not home to see you.” If a drunk beggar asks for money and you say, “I have no money,” it’s understood to mean, “I have no money to give you.” Also I read in a Catholic book somewhere that it’s no sin to tell children about Santa Claus, but I don’t think they gave the reason (although that certainly agrees with common sense).