Okay to lie?

[markncols]

I have a problem with this topic.
I have a terminal illness that has parkinson like symptoms.
I can’t work, so I volunteer.
When people ask me how I’m doing if I say anything but dying, am I going to hell?
When a friend offers a choice of activities and I choose the one that pleases them, even if I don’t want to do it am I lying?

Mark

 

[fhansen]

Is it okay to lie when female friend/ family member asks if they look okay in what they are wearing? When I ask this question I want honesty, but I am finding that most women just want justification to have confidence in themselves. Is it okay to say they look great if they are wearing something unusual/ugly? I usually give them an honest answer, but I am starting to think its not the best idea…

You’ve described the only situation where lying is excusable, not to mention the safest route.

 

[seagal]

I have a problem with this topic.
I have a terminal illness that has parkinson like symptoms.
I can’t work, so I volunteer.
When people ask me how I’m doing if I say anything but dying, am I going to hell?
Mark

You are not obligated to pass on all personal information just because someone asks. In the Catechism of the Catholic Church it says (note in particular the underlined sections).

2488 The right to the communication of the truth is not unconditional. Everyone must conform his life to the Gospel precept of fraternal love. This requires us in concrete situations to judge whether or not it is appropriate to reveal the truth to someone who asks for it.

2489 Charity and respect for the truth should dictate the response to every request for information or communication. The good and safety of others, respect for privacy, and the common good are sufficient reasons for being silent about what ought not be known or for making use of a discreet language. The duty to avoid scandal often commands strict discretion. No one is bound to reveal the truth to someone who does not have the right to know it.

When a friend offers a choice of activities and I choose the one that pleases them, even if I don’t want to do it am I lying?

That’s called being polite.

 

[SHoJjhmou]

You’ve described the only situation where lying is excusable, not to mention the safest route.

Lying is never excusable.

Just use mental reservation and say something like, I don’t know, that dress very vibrant and colorful, or something vague like that.

If a female is rather heavy and asks if a dress makes her look fat, then you could honestly say no, because the dress isn’t causing her to gain weight.

 

[teeboy]

I’m not going to answer the original question; however, I think God knows your motive for telling someone that they look nice when you don’t think they do.

I get asked questions quite often. Most of these questions are unsolicited and I’d rather not have been asked them. Questions often divert peoples attention. The question you refer to is a silly question, and deep down the person asking these questions may be up to some evil that he/she is not aware (such as entrapment).

You may prefer to answer an unsolicited question with a question as opposed to an answer.

 

[SHoJjhmou]

I’m not going to answer the original question; however, I think God knows your motive for telling someone that they look nice when you don’t think they do.

Yes, God knows your motive, but no good intention justifies lying.

I get asked questions quite often. Most of these questions are unsolicited and I’d rather not have been asked them. Questions often divert peoples attention. The question you refer to is a silly question, and deep down the person asking these questions may be up to some evil that he/she is not aware (such as entrapment).

You may prefer to answer an unsolicited question with a question as opposed to an answer.

This. If a random person came up to me and asked if a dress looked nice, I would ask her “Why? Where are you going?” and change the conversation from there.