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Arizona_Mike
Guest
There’s an interesting new book out by the economist Bryan Caplan, “Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids.” It’s not a religious book at all, Caplan simply argues from a statistical basis that the fears most people have about having children are misplaced, that having kids is less work and more fun than you might think, and that being a parent makes good sense from an economic perspective. If you’re a new parent, or thinking about being a new parent, it might be worth a read and will probably allay some of your fears, although I don’t agree with the author on everything.
One of the points Caplan makes is that while we worry about bringing a child into this world,
What’s funny about these doubts is that virtually no one feels that it was unfair for their parents to have them. While we waste a lot of time blaming our parents for our problems, almost no one tells himself: “My parents were wrong to have me. They should be ashamed of themselves.”
The more specific the doubts, the weirder they sound. Many prospective parents fret, “It’s not fair to have a child when we’re having trouble making ends meet,” or “It’s not fair to have a child out of loneliness.” Can you imagine someone saying, “My whole life has been a mistake because I grew up poor,” or “My parents had me out of loneliness.” These are flimsy reasons to regret your own existence. If they wouldn’t come close to convincing you that your life was a mistake, aren’t they equally flimsy reasons against passing the gift of life along to someone else?
Almost everyone – children of flawed parents included – is glad to be alive. The upshot is that, contrary to popular worries, almost anyone who decides to reproduce is doing the child a favor. Fretting about “fairness” is looking a gift horse in the mouth. No one asks to be born, but almost everyone would if they could.
…In the graphic novel “It’s a Bird,” a writer named Steve shows how Huntington’s disease, a dreadful hereditary condition, has haunted his family. He finally realizes that his father doesn’t want to admit to himself that he might have doomed his own children…simply by having them.” Steve finally tells his dad to forget his regrets: “I’d rather have known my family, and fallen in love with Lisa, and written my stories, and then come down with Huntington’s…if that turns out to be my fate…than not to have lived, and missed all that.”
I can’t argue that there aren’t people who live under horrible conditions that don’t think about ending their own life, or that don’t hope that the end will come quickly. It is a fact that all the pain and suffering, and more, that most of us feel throughout a long life may be condensed into the short life of one who is least equipped to deal with it. I remain convinced, however, that a short and painful life, or even a long and painful life, is better than no existence at all.One wonders, too, what the atheist answer to this is. I don’t think they have one, except perhaps rigorous gene surveillance, abortion, and mandated eugenics. Some have called for the euthanasia of the deformed after birth (like the old pagan Roman law that mandated that the paterfamilias of a household kill any child born with a deformity.) “Bioethicist” Peter Singer, who holds an endowed chair at Princeton, argues that it is ethical to kill elders with cognitive impairments as well as newborns with birth defects, from the Utilitarian perspective which is shared by many “New” Atheists. Somehow, I don’t see that as an answer.