On Abortion and IVF

[Sair]

Hello, all,

After my adventures in the “What does God make of feminism” thread, and being finagled into the abortion debate, I thought I would throw a further spanner into the works, because I’m curious to find out what people’s gut feelings and /or considered opinions are regarding the issues surrounding IVF treatment.

Now, it is my understanding that the Catholic Church holds IVF to be an unnatural, invasive and often destructive means of dealing with infertility, and one that runs counter to the unitive aspect of marriage. However, perceptions in the wider community are quite benign on the matter of IVF. Yet, if looked at from a practical point of view, it is quite possible that IVF clinics are responsible for the destruction of more babies-to-be than abortion clinics. One could certainly argue that the ultimate aim of IVF is quite the opposite of that of abortion, but the fact remains that all parties to a course of IVF treatment go into it well aware that of the embryos used in the process, the vast majority will die. This certainly begs the question - is the birth of one child worth the deaths of, say, ten, maybe 20 embryos?

My real point of wondering is: why the contrast in public responses to abortion and to IVF, when the actual outcomes are so much the same? To hark back to the feminism thread, my own opinion on this matter is that it has been assumed since time immemorial that childbearing is the ultimate goal and purpose of a woman’s life, and that all women, at the core of their being, desire to be mothers (something which is demonstrably not true, I might add). Therefore, for a woman to voluntarily end a pregnancy is considered unnatural, but for her to go to any lengths - even consenting to the mass slaughter of fertilised embryos - to achieve motherhood is quite acceptable.

Moral relativism, anyone?

 

[bilop]

Hello, all,

After my adventures in the “What does God make of feminism” thread, and being finagled into the abortion debate, I thought I would throw a further spanner into the works, because I’m curious to find out what people’s gut feelings and /or considered opinions are regarding the issues surrounding IVF treatment.

Now, it is my understanding that the Catholic Church holds IVF to be an unnatural, invasive and often destructive means of dealing with infertility, and one that runs counter to the unitive aspect of marriage. However, perceptions in the wider community are quite benign on the matter of IVF. Yet, if looked at from a practical point of view, it is quite possible that IVF clinics are responsible for the destruction of more babies-to-be than abortion clinics. One could certainly argue that the ultimate aim of IVF is quite the opposite of that of abortion, but the fact remains that all parties to a course of IVF treatment go into it well aware that of the embryos used in the process, the vast majority will die. This certainly begs the question - is the birth of one child worth the deaths of, say, ten, maybe 20 embryos?

My real point of wondering is: why the contrast in public responses to abortion and to IVF, when the actual outcomes are so much the same? To hark back to the feminism thread, my own opinion on this matter is that it has been assumed since time immemorial that childbearing is the ultimate goal and purpose of a woman’s life, and that all women, at the core of their being, desire to be mothers (something which is demonstrably not true, I might add). Therefore, for a woman to voluntarily end a pregnancy is considered unnatural, but for her to go to any lengths - even consenting to the mass slaughter of fertilised embryos - to achieve motherhood is quite acceptable.

Moral relativism, anyone?

Yes.

Our society has warped the idea of parenthood from viewing children as a gift of God to treating them as a consumer.

If people want children, they’ll move heaven and earth to get them, pay any price commit any sin, because THEY WANT THEM and they want them NOW.

But, if children are inconvenient (mistimed pregnancy, leftover embryos, too many embryos implant) they will just kill them.

It is an abombination that cries to heaven for vengeance.

God Bless

 

[ComputerGeek25]

Hello, all,

After my adventures in the “What does God make of feminism” thread, and being finagled into the abortion debate, I thought I would throw a further spanner into the works, because I’m curious to find out what people’s gut feelings and /or considered opinions are regarding the issues surrounding IVF treatment.

Now, it is my understanding that the Catholic Church holds IVF to be an unnatural, invasive and often destructive means of dealing with infertility, and one that runs counter to the unitive aspect of marriage. However, perceptions in the wider community are quite benign on the matter of IVF. Yet, if looked at from a practical point of view, it is quite possible that IVF clinics are responsible for the destruction of more babies-to-be than abortion clinics. One could certainly argue that the ultimate aim of IVF is quite the opposite of that of abortion, but the fact remains that all parties to a course of IVF treatment go into it well aware that of the embryos used in the process, the vast majority will die. This certainly begs the question - is the birth of one child worth the deaths of, say, ten, maybe 20 embryos?

My real point of wondering is: why the contrast in public responses to abortion and to IVF, when the actual outcomes are so much the same? To hark back to the feminism thread, my own opinion on this matter is that it has been assumed since time immemorial that childbearing is the ultimate goal and purpose of a woman’s life, and that all women, at the core of their being, desire to be mothers (something which is demonstrably not true, I might add). Therefore, for a woman to voluntarily end a pregnancy is considered unnatural, but for her to go to any lengths - even consenting to the mass slaughter of fertilised embryos - to achieve motherhood is quite acceptable.

Moral relativism, anyone?

This is classic moral relativism.

I’d also like to point out that there are many men and women who would do anything moral to have children, yet there are so many babies aborted.

 

[pyoung]

Hello, all,

After my adventures in the “What does God make of feminism” thread, and being finagled into the abortion debate, I thought I would throw a further spanner into the works, because I’m curious to find out what people’s gut feelings and /or considered opinions are regarding the issues surrounding IVF treatment.

Now, it is my understanding that the Catholic Church holds IVF to be an unnatural, invasive and often destructive means of dealing with infertility, and one that runs counter to the unitive aspect of marriage. However, perceptions in the wider community are quite benign on the matter of IVF. Yet, if looked at from a practical point of view, it is quite possible that IVF clinics are responsible for the destruction of more babies-to-be than abortion clinics. One could certainly argue that the ultimate aim of IVF is quite the opposite of that of abortion, but the fact remains that all parties to a course of IVF treatment go into it well aware that of the embryos used in the process, the vast majority will die. This certainly begs the question - is the birth of one child worth the deaths of, say, ten, maybe 20 embryos?

My real point of wondering is: why the contrast in public responses to abortion and to IVF, when the actual outcomes are so much the same? To hark back to the feminism thread, my own opinion on this matter is that it has been assumed since time immemorial that childbearing is the ultimate goal and purpose of a woman’s life, and that all women, at the core of their being, desire to be mothers (something which is demonstrably not true, I might add). Therefore, for a woman to voluntarily end a pregnancy is considered unnatural, but for her to go to any lengths - even consenting to the mass slaughter of fertilised embryos - to achieve motherhood is quite acceptable.

Moral relativism, anyone?

I know from personal experience what it is like to want children, try to have them and fail. I did go to a infertilty specialist and did get hormone shots and even went as far as having an insemination. All this failed. I stopped short on IVF. At the time I wasn’t sure why. Over time I came to realize, I did not agree with it and did not feel it was inline with Church testings and what God would want. I felt that if God wanted me to conceive a child, he would have made it happen, without IVF.

There is always adoption. This did not work for us but if started early enough is a great alternative fot couples.

As far as IVF and frozen embryo’s, I don’t think they are meant to be left and thrown away, BUT feel this is what is happening.

That brings me to anouther point. If the frozen embryo’s will be disposed of sooner or later, why can’t they be used for Stem Cell research? I mean if they aren’t or can’t be viable, shouldn’t their life be used for the good of all mankind, instead of thrown away?

 

[bilop]

Yes.

Our society has warped the idea of parenthood from viewing children as a gift of God to treating them as a consumer good.

If people want children, they’ll move heaven and earth to get them, pay any price commit any sin, because THEY WANT THEM and they want them NOW.

But, if children are inconvenient (mistimed pregnancy, leftover embryos, too many embryos implant) they will just kill them.

It is an abombination that cries to heaven for vengeance.

God Bless

 

[Feedmysheep]

As technology advances, it comes to a point where we don’t even need to try very hard to cheapen life- all our science and progress does it for us.

That, coupled with a consumerism gone mad mentality, where nothing is worth anything if it can’t be marketed, sold, and profitable, means that in the arena of reproductive issues, the vox populi will learn to accept any activity that is for sale. Abortions are a profitable business, chemical contraceptives, surgical sterilizations, IVF and “fertility treatments” are all commodities to be bought and sold.

We pay big bucks to avoid having children, to kill them if we “accidentally” conceive, to grow them in a lab when we want them and can’t have them, then the money REALLY starts rolling in- the medical industry, the fashion industry, the entertainment industry, the fast food industry, all these money making machines start rolling, with the sole goal of turning children into consumers as soon as possible.

So I think if you look at it from a materialistic viewpoint, there’s no relativism at all- it all boils down to the almighty dollar. IVF and abortions, seemingly opposite points on a spectrum, really both equal money for interests big enough to ensure the practices continue.

 

[Feedmysheep]

That brings me to anouther point. If the frozen embryo’s will be disposed of sooner or later, why can’t they be used for Stem Cell research? I mean if they aren’t or can’t be viable, shouldn’t their life be used for the good of all mankind, instead of thrown away?

This would be an example of big business lulling people’s sense of right and wrong into a state of stupor- all to line someone’s pockets.

Pyoung,
This is sort of like saying, “Why can’t unwanted street children be used for manual labor? I mean, no one wants them, shouldn’t their life be used for the good of all mankind, instead of thrown away?”

If you understand that life begins at conception, then your above question is answered for you.

 

[mapleoak]

If the frozen embryo’s will be disposed of sooner or later, why can’t they be used for Stem Cell research? I mean if they aren’t or can’t be viable, shouldn’t their life be used for the good of all mankind, instead of thrown away?

Because they are young living human beings. Living human beings should not be killed, mutilated, and operated upon for experimentation. Even if it is certain that someones fate is certain death, this is not licensce to kill them prematurely and experiment on them.

 

[sabla01]

I am aghast at these postings… How can you compare the wanting of a child (IVF) to the murder of a child (abortion)??? My husband and I are both catholics who actively practice our faith. After trying to conceive for over many years, we turned to IVF. After many many attempts we conceived our daughter. I have NEVER even contemplated the destruction of any embryos. The embryos that remain are frozen and will not be allowed to die. We have 4 embryos left and my husband and I would welcome the opportunity to parent all 4 of these would-be-children. (or more!!)

I suffered a horrible rape at the age of 7 (by a known child molester) that left scar tissue making me unable to conceive. Do I believe god preferred that I also be denied the absolute pleasure of carrying and bearing a child? No, I do not. I prayed for the IVF to be successful… and indeed it was. I was blessed. God loves all children … mine included.

I don’t feel any reason to be ashamed to say that my daughter was conceived this way - despite what you might say…

~ A proud catholic mom

 

[vz71]

I don’t feel any reason to be ashamed to say that my daughter was conceived this way - despite what you might say…

You know the only thing wrong with the fruit that Adam and Eve partook of was that God said no.
It wasn’t poison, it wasn’t foul tasting, in fact the bible tells us it tasted fairly good.
All that was wrong with it is the fact that God said NO.
And all of the consequence from that decision rains down from the choice of self over God.

I read the previous post, and what struck me was the I’s all over it. I suffered this, I believe that, I etc…
What about God?

I am sorry for the suffering that has been wrought by the unspeakable acts of your childhood, but that is not sufficient reason to discard God’s word.

 

[kyria]

I am aghast at these postings… How can you compare the wanting of a child (IVF) to the murder of a child (abortion)??? My husband and I are both catholics who actively practice our faith. After trying to conceive for over many years, we turned to IVF. After many many attempts we conceived our daughter. I have NEVER even contemplated the destruction of any embryos. The embryos that remain are frozen and will not be allowed to die. We have 4 embryos left and my husband and I would welcome the opportunity to parent all 4 of these would-be-children. (or more!!)

I suffered a horrible rape at the age of 7 (by a known child molester) that left scar tissue making me unable to conceive. Do I believe god preferred that I also be denied the absolute pleasure of carrying and bearing a child? No, I do not. I prayed for the IVF to be successful… and indeed it was. I was blessed. God loves all children … mine included.

I don’t feel any reason to be ashamed to say that my daughter was conceived this way - despite what you might say…

~ A proud catholic mom

You might not have considered the destruction of your embryos, but the fact remains many embryos developed during IVF and not used do get destroyed. That is still killing a baby, just outside of the womb. You might be aghast, but I am aghast at the fact you chose to ignore Church teaching and call yourself a Catholic. Yes your daughter is loved by God, but how as a proud Catholic mother are you going to explain to her that it is ok to be a Catholic, but if you don’t agree with some of the teachings you can ignore them.

 

[kyria]

I am against IVF. We are not God nor do we have the right to play God. We don’t always know God’s reasons for things happening and why some cannot conceive a child. My brother in law and his wife could not conceive naturally because he’d suffered an accident on his scrotum as a child and semen could not come out. So he and his wife tried IVF. They successfully had two children. Now it turns out the children have a disability that is of genetic origin and comes via the mother. The eldest child is mildly mentally challenged and the youngest child is severely mentally and physically disabled.

If we say we are Catholics we follow Catholic teachings. If we choose to find our own reasons for IVF, then we cannot call ourselves true Catholics.

One woman I heard of who’s daughter chose IVF stated that the daughter had to agree to abort the fetus if anything was wrong with it. I would like to know how many aborted IVF babies there has been, it might give another spin on the reason why IVF is not sanctioned by the Church and ultimately by God.

The other problem with IVF is people can donate unused embroyos to others. That means a woman can give birth to a baby that is not genetically related to herself and yet goes on the birth cert as being the birth mother.

IVF is playing with fire, and risking your salvation, and if you think you can front up to God when the time comes and make an excuse good luck.

In my personal opinion IVF is just as wrong as abortion. One lesser evil in some people’s eyes doesn’t make it any less wrong.

 

[sabla01]

This is obviously the wrong site for me… I have spoken to my priest and am resound in my faith. I have never experienced such hate/intolerance on a site before. No need to respond to this post further - I will not return. Thanks, but no thanks. Now, I see why some turn from religion. My church is so loving and accepting - thank god for them - I had no idea how lucky I was for their kindness and compassion.

 

[st_lucy]

I am aghast at these postings… How can you compare the wanting of a child (IVF) to the murder of a child (abortion)??? My husband and I are both catholics who actively practice our faith. After trying to conceive for over many years, we turned to IVF. After many many attempts we conceived our daughter. I have NEVER even contemplated the destruction of any embryos. The embryos that remain are frozen and will not be allowed to die. We have 4 embryos left and my husband and I would welcome the opportunity to parent all 4 of these would-be-children. (or more!!)

I suffered a horrible rape at the age of 7 (by a known child molester) that left scar tissue making me unable to conceive. Do I believe god preferred that I also be denied the absolute pleasure of carrying and bearing a child? No, I do not. I prayed for the IVF to be successful… and indeed it was. I was blessed. God loves all children … mine included.

I don’t feel any reason to be ashamed to say that my daughter was conceived this way - despite what you might say…

~ A proud catholic mom

Hello,
I am very glad you have your beautiful daughter. God does draw straight with crooked lines. Have you given it a thought that you now not only have one child but you also have four others who you have chosen to keep in a frozen limbo. You have four beautiful babies who have not been given the right to grow and move and love. They are FROZEN and waiting for mom and dad to help them. They are alive and created and they need YOU to help them. Please do not forget them, help them, yes you created them and now you have one of them with you but what about the others.

 

[st_lucy]

This is obviously the wrong site for me… I have spoken to my priest and am resound in my faith. I have never experienced such hate/intolerance on a site before. No need to respond to this post further - I will not return. Thanks, but no thanks. Now, I see why some turn from religion. My church is so loving and accepting - thank god for them - I had no idea how lucky I was for their kindness and compassion.

I don’t think anyone is hating you. We are concerned that you have children in limbo who are not been given the right to life. Please consult with someone who knows the faith, I hope this priest isn’t leading you astray. Please help those children you have.

 

[vz71]

I have never experienced such hate/intolerance on a site before. No need to respond to this post further - I will not return. Thanks, but no thanks.

Apologies, but I am at a loss to find where anyone has expressed hatred towards you.

Where do you see this? Please quote the post for us so that there can be an opportunity to clear up any misunderstandings.

 

[sabla01]

St. Lucy – thank you for your response – it expressed a little humanity which is what I expected on a site such as this.

Let me explain a bit further … When my husband and I underwent the IVF we knew it was not to be taken lightly. We researched it thoroughly and yes, our priest did explain the church’s point of view. I do understand that some who undergo this treatment may not take it so seriously. During the IVF, 10 embryos (babies) were created. The first time 3 were implanted. But – we did not acheive a pregnancy. The other 7 were frozen. We went back. We were told that there were only 2 really good embryos left and that we should implant those and forget the rest. We, of course, adamantly refused this. So they implanted 3 embryos (1 they considered “good” and 2 that they felt would not make it) and happily we conceived our daughter this time. We never signed a paper saying we would abort a child under ANY circumstances. My doctor is fully aware that selective reduction is NEVER an option for me and he is aware that I absolutely consider those 4 frozen embryos to be my future sons and/or daughters. My husband and I accepted this when we signed on for the procedure. We also accepted that a baby (even one deemed imperfect in another’s eyes) would be the gift from God that we would happily accept. I applaud your concern for the 4 remaining embryos frozen in limbo – they have not been forgotten. My daughter will soon turn 2 and I am set to implant the last 4 at the end of the month.

VZ 71 you say, “I read the previous post, and what struck me was the I’s all over it. I suffered this, I believe that, I etc…
What about God?

I am sorry for the suffering that has been wrought by the unspeakable acts of your childhood, but that is not sufficient reason to discard God’s word.”

While I hear the words “sorry for your suffering” in your post – they seem more than a bit empty…. At first it deeply affected me – your cavalier attitude – but now I realize you don’t know me – don’t owe me a thing…. You ask what about God? So let me tell you a thing or two that I know about God. Forgive me for the use of “I’s” since that seems so offensive to you. (But unlike others on this site I can only speak for myself – I don’t try to speak for Him).

As I lay on the cement floor of that basement at the age of 7 knowing that this monster was going to kill me – I felt scared. But I did not feel forsaken. My clarity of thought was amazing – I felt God with me but knew that if I was going to survive I needed to save myself and that’s exactly what I did (and then testified to put the monster away for good). I am aware that God doesn’t ALLOW bad things to happen to people and I also am clear that no one is entitled a child. But faced with the crisis of infertility (and it IS a life crisis) I knew one thing for sure – God was with me but I needed to seek out a way to help myself. I feel as if I have stayed within the confines of HIS teachings. I am keenly aware that you do not feel the same.

And finally “kyria” you ask – “but how as a proud Catholic mother are you going to explain to her that it is ok to be a Catholic, but if you don’t agree with some of the teachings you can ignore them.”

To say what we did was wrong would be like saying she was a mistake – and she was nothing of the sort. I will happily explain it to her … the alternative (never having her and thus never having to explain it) would be too heartbreaking to imagine. I find it shameful that you feel as if you can judge me so critically. There is only one true judge … and I am clear that I will not have to “front up to God”…

(Quote) “The Catholic Church is very clear that life begins at the moment of conception. In 1974, the Pope wrote in the Document on Procured Abortion:- “From the time that the ovum is fertilized a new life is begun which is neither that of the father or the mother. It is the life of a new human being with its own growth. It would never become a human if it were not human already.” The Church is therefore against any procedure which creates spare embryos that are later destroyed or experimented upon. Any created embryos should have the status of a human. To deliberately destroy or experiment upon an embryo in this way is very wrong. Therefore, the Catholic Church can support the use of Artificial Insemination which does not create spare embryos. IVF however, is an acceptable practice if only the number of eggs are fertilized which are to be replaced in the mother. We cannot support creating spare embryos which are later destroyed. Life begins at conception and we must respect that as we develop new techniques of helping people like yourselves.”
Sincerely, Father Don Tdoit

 

[kyria]

Sabla01 as a mother I can understand your desire to be a mother also, but this isn’t just about you. This is about undermining the teaching of the Catholic faith and you admit you discussed this with a priest prior to undergoing IVF, hence you admit you knew it was against Church teaching. What you are trying to do is justify your reasons for going against Church teachings. This affects the Catholic Church as a whole. I am a mother trying to teach my children why one must follow the teachings of the Catholic Church, and what am I to do when they come across Catholics who have had IVF?

I will have no choice but to tell them those Catholics went against Church teachings, because I can’t tell them what you and other Catholics who have undertaken IVF are right in doing so.

I am not saying you have to explain to your daughter she was a mistake, but inside you, do you not aknowledge what you did was against Church teachings? because going against those Church teachings has repurcussions for your daughter in that it affects your ability to teach her all of the teachings of the Catholic faith should be followed, and the Catholic faith as a whole is affected. You risk teaching your daughter and other Catholics that it is ok if one feels within themselves they have a good reason, they can go against Church teaching.

We are the Catholic faith as a whole, not a whole lot of individuals who get to pick and choose what teachings they follow and then try to justify why they have gone against those teachings.

I am sorry if you feel hurt by my posts and others, but the fact remains you went against Church teachings, teachings that have been in place in the Church that Christ set up, so you are going against Christ’s teachings. You can find any reason to justify your actions, but when one tries to justify going against one teaching, they risk justifying going against other teachings, they risk influencing others to go against Church teachings also. You undermine the teachings of the Catholic faith and the Church as a whole.

It is a sin, and finding justification for that sin, doesn’t make it any less of a sin.

I am not judging you, I am simply pointing out to you the facts. As you say God will be the judge. Being judged by God isn’t a risk I am willing to take, which is why I try my darnest to ensure I follow Church teachings now. Because when we take a risk now, we take a risk in the after life. Our teachings are there to try and assist us to minimise that risk in the afterlife.

Calling oneself Catholic means living within the Catholic teachings.

 

[Biggie]

Not too long after my first child, my daughter, became engaged, she began experiencing problems that resulted in hospitalization and loss of all but a quarter of her ovaries. The gynecologist suggested that if she had taken birth control and had been more sexually active she might not have experienced the problems she had. To his credit, her fiancee did not hesitate despite the fact that after extensive medical treatment, he knew it would be very difficult for her to concieve. They were wed. My daughter continued her treatment, first taking very expensive fertility drugs, later doing what she could without success for four years. Inevitably the IVF option was raised. Both young people, being devout, decided not too consider it. Instead, they began fostering infant children. We now have a beautiful granddaughter and grandson through fostering and she is presently caring for an infant boy born methadone addicted.

I often reflect on how difficult it is to discern the Lord’s will for us and there is much I would question the Lord about in the direction he takes us. I often cannot understand why after prayer, work and perseverance he still doesn’t budge. I call it a sticky problem and my theory is that every person has at least one deisgned for him, a problem that the Lord lets stick to a person. But if you don’t accept your situation on faith after it is clear it cannot be morally changed, how can you show the Lord you trust him no matter what?

 

[rlg94086]

(Quote) “The Catholic Church is very clear that life begins at the moment of conception. In 1974, the Pope wrote in the Document on Procured Abortion:- “From the time that the ovum is fertilized a new life is begun which is neither that of the father or the mother. It is the life of a new human being with its own growth. It would never become a human if it were not human already.” The Church is therefore against any procedure which creates spare embryos that are later destroyed or experimented upon. Any created embryos should have the status of a human. To deliberately destroy or experiment upon an embryo in this way is very wrong. Therefore, the Catholic Church can support the use of Artificial Insemination which does not create spare embryos. IVF however, is an acceptable practice if only the number of eggs are fertilized which are to be replaced in the mother. We cannot support creating spare embryos which are later destroyed. Life begins at conception and we must respect that as we develop new techniques of helping people like yourselves.”
Sincerely, Father Don Tdoit

Hi sabla01,

I was intrigued by the quote of (your priest?) Father Tdoit, so I did some searching of Vatican documents regarding IVF. I did not do this to disprove you or hit you over the head with Church teaching. In fact, I was just curious as to whether there are cases where IVF or Artificial Insemination.

This document goes into great detail about what is licit and what is not: vatican.va/roman_curia/congregations/cfaith/documents/rc_con_cfaith_doc_19870222_respect-for-human-life_en.html

First of all, in the case of *heterologous artificial fertilization or procreation (one of the gametes are not from the spouses), *none of these methods are licit. In the case of *artificial homologous fertilization or procreation *(gametes of both spouses), it says the following.

Regarding IVF and ET:

Conception in vitro is the result of the technical action which presides over fertilization. *Such fertilization is neither in fact achieved nor positively willed as the expression and fruit of a specific act of the conjugal union. In homologous IVF and ET, therefore, even if it is considered in the context of ‘de facto’ existing sexual relations, the generation of the human person is objectively deprived of its proper perfection: namely, that of being the result and fruit of a conjugal act *in which the spouses can become “cooperators with God for giving life to a new person”.(50) These reasons enable us to understand why the act of conjugal love is considered in the teaching of the Church as the only setting worthy of human procreation. For the same reasons the so-called “simple case”, i.e. a homologous IVF and ET procedure that is free of any compromise with the abortive practice of destroying embryos and with masturbation, remains a technique which is morally illicit because it deprives human procreation of the dignity which is proper and connatural to it. Certainly, homologous IVF and ET fertilization is not marked by all that ethical negativity found in extra-conjugal procreation; the family and marriage continue to constitute the setting for the birth and upbringing of the children. Nevertheless, in conformity with the traditional doctrine relating to the goods of marriage and the dignity of the person, the Church remain opposed from the moral point of view to homologous ‘in vitro’ fertilization. Such fertilization is in itself illicit and in opposition to the dignity of procreation and of the conjugal union, even when everything is done to avoid the death of the human embryo. Although the manner in which human conception is achieved with IVF and ET cannot be approved, every child which comes into the world must in any case be accepted as a living gift of the divine Goodness and must be brought up with love.

Regarding Artificial Insemination:

Homologous artificial insemination within marriage cannot be admitted except for those cases in which the technical means is not a substitute for the conjugal act but serves to facilitate and to help so that the act attains its natural purpose.
The teaching of the Magisterium on this point has already been stated.(51) This teaching is not just an expression of particular historical circumstances but is based on the Church’s doctrine concerning the connection between the conjugal union and procreation and on a consideration of the personal nature of the conjugal act and of human procreation. "In its natural structure, the conjugal act is a personal action, a simultaneous and immediate cooperation on the part of the husband and wife, which by the very nature of the agents and the proper nature of the act is the expression of the mutual gift which, according to the words of Scripture, brings about union ‘in one flesh’ ".(52) Thus moral conscience “does not necessarily proscribe the use of certain artificial means destined solely either to the facilitating of the natural act or to ensuring that the natural act normally performed achieves its proper end”.(53)** If the technical means facilitates the conjugal act or helps it to reach its natural objectives, it can be morally acceptable.** If, on the other hand, the procedure were to replace the conjugal act, it is morally illicit. Artificial insemination as a substitute for the conjugal act is prohibited by reason of the voluntarily achieved dissociation of the two meanings of the conjugal act. Masturbation, through which the sperm is normally obtained, is another sign of this dissociation: even when it is done for the purpose of procreation, the act remains deprived of its unitive meaning: "It lacks the sexual relationship called for by the moral order, namely the relationship which realizes ‘the full sense of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love’ ".(54)

I don’t know enough about the procedures to know how artificial insemination is possible without masturbation to obtain the sperm, but that is what the Church teaches.

So, that understood, it would appear your priest was in error. This certainly means IMHO that your culpability is lessened, as you asked your priest in good conscience whether what you were doing was correct. As the first quote I provided says, “although the manner in which human conception is achieved with IVF and ET cannot be approved, every child which comes into the world must in any case be accepted as a living gift of the divine Goodness and must be brought up with love.”

God bless you and your children - born and unborn.