On Local Parishes

[jjdrury81]

I was reading the other thread regarding attending a local parish and ‘parish shopping’ and it struck a chord with an issue that my wife and I have been dealing with as of late. We recently bought our first house in late August. Our new home is in the next town over.

So far, we have been attending Mass at our old parish. The parish was in walking distance of our apartment and we really, really like it. We have developed a relationship with the staff, priest and parishioners that is very precious to us.

However, it is about a 20 minute drive to the parish now. And we pass right by another parish about 5 minutes into the drive. I think that we should give the local parish a try while my wife does not want to walk out where we feel at home.

Anyone else ever have this situation or can offer any advice?

 

[ljubim]

I’d say only if the gas money was an issue should you worry about the distance. Maybe get a good feel for the closer one so you can actually make the decision (like go to their Saturday mass, still going to your old parish.)

I prefer the church a bit farther away too… it’s actually the closer one (literally in sight of my house) where my family has the roots. It’s sort of a switch-off where we feel like going. The farther one is far more traditional, and the music seems more fitting for mass… plus the tabernacle is right behind the altar, not off to the side in an alcove:thumbsup: It’s all where you’re comfortable. Honestly, being involved in two parishes is wonderful! It’s quite an experience.

 

[Bluegoat]

I think since both are fairly close, and you have real ties with the old one, you can make a choice.

Parish shopping is at its worst when it involves setting yourself up as a kind of judge, or thinking the people in one parish are somehow better than those in another. tHat doesn’t seem to be the case here.

Two things I would think about - one is the gas, not from a monetary, but from an environmental perspective.

THe other is whether the closer church would be more active in your own particular community. If so, you may want to somehow cultivate ties with both. For example, if they ran a soup kitchen at the newer parish, you could volunteer for that. I think it is important to try to be active in the community you actually live in.

 

[Phemie]

Another thing that I think you have to consider is that your ‘old’ parish is not canonically responsible for you. The parish within whose boundaries you live is. While that may not mean much to you at this time, it might become important if you require something more from the Church than a place to attend Mass. Don’t know if you’re just starting out or close to retirement but if you have kids the new parish would be the one responsible for their sacraments.

 

[Lujack]

Another thing that I think you have to consider is that your ‘old’ parish is not canonically responsible for you. The parish within whose boundaries you live is. While that may not mean much to you at this time, it might become important if you require something more from the Church than a place to attend Mass. Don’t know if you’re just starting out or close to retirement but if you have kids the new parish would be the one responsible for their sacraments.

Now, I’m curious about this: my family never attended the parish we territorially belonged to, but instead attended one that was just down the road (its New Jersey; five parishes within a thirty minute distance or something like that). I’m not quite sure why we switched, but I do believe it has something to do with my youngest brother’s baptism (he was a baby, the pastor was recovering from a stroke and struggling to speak normally, and for some reason he decided to hold my youngest brother over his head like in the Lion King, which nearly gave my poor mother a stroke of her own). Either why, I had not yet made my First Communion, but I did receive it at our new parish, even though we still belonged to the old one. The same went for all of my brothers, and we were all confirmed there, as well.

What are the rules in this case?

 

[puzzleannie]

I
Anyone else ever have this situation or can offer any advice?

since it is simply a matter of preference, and you and your wife disagree, you will have to discuss it and arrive at a mutual agreement

do keep in mind that if you will be asking for sacraments or getting involved in parish life the pastor will expect you to be registered, attending Mass and participating in the parish where you expect to have these needs met.