Open Asexuality

[Thorolfr]

Hi Thorolfr. Can you cite a Church document that tells gay people to stay in the closet?

I can cite stories of gay Catholics in same sex relationships who have been accused by their priest or other Church officials of causing scandal when their relationships became public knowledge.

 

[Rau]

I can cite stories of gay Catholics in same sex relationships who have been accused of causing scandal when their relationships became public knowledge.

That’s about behaviour, not about revealing one’s inclinations.

 

[Antoinette_W]

Why is sexual identity so important to people today - why do people have a need to flaunt their sexual identity. I have never understood this or do I feel a need to identify in that way. Its always been a mystery to me - my sexuality is not what I want people to know me for and which is a private matter and is actually no one business but mine . It seems only in this modern world it has become so important.
I am not interested in whom you have sex with or what your sexual preference is - why do I need to know this? Please keep me out of it.
Can anyone tell me why this is such a great need for people in today’s world?

A Free Society?
I started working over a year ago as a part time employee in a small town pizza place,
A few months later a new employee was hired, and we weretold that this employee wanted to be referred to, and recognized as a male, even though in the Job Application - gender was stated female.
I was confused, because this person looked, sounded, and acted female. There was nothing to make you think “male”.
I worked with this person on a few occasions and I thought we worked well together.
But I was having problems dealing with this “alternate” reality, and often referred to this person accidentally as “she” or “her”. On one of our shifts together, I confessed to this person that I noticed I was often saying “her” or “she”. It was not meant to offend, but an unconscious slip. It just came out of my mouth (before I remembered to mentally processed the new rules) for this person.
I realize now, I was having trouble because I could not realistically process that someone who was born female, looked, sounded, and acted like female - be referred to and thought of as male. I tried, but I guess it just wouldn’t register in me.
I concluded that the reason it wasn’t “registering in me”, was because I was actually trying to deceive myself about what my eyes saw and my mind told me, and then needed to convince myself - to continue to walk in that deception. And all because this person wanted it that way. If that person wants to walk that path, that is their right - but they shouldn’t have the right to make others walk it too!
Also, now it is legislated that we conform to the “gender identity” a person chooses.
Is that Freedom?
 Certainly not for most of us.

 

[Peter_J]

I can cite stories of gay Catholics in same sex relationships who have been accused by their priest or other Church officials of causing scandal when their relationships became public knowledge.

I second Rau’s point.

Someone who shares with others that he or she is gay (please note that being gay is not synonymous with living a so-called “gay lifestyle”) may, possibly, be looked upon suspiciously by those other people (in much the same way that people might look at an engaged straight couple and wonder “Are they waiting till their wedding day?”) but that can in no way be equated with the Church telling him or her to stay in the closet.

P.S. In the stories that you said you could cite, did the priest or church official treat illicit relationships differently depending whether the couple is SS or OS?

 

[xNoOnex]

I’m asexual. (Although I’m not entirely a fan of the term, since it reminds me of amoebas.) I’m also fairly open about it and believe that it’s important to be… It prevents misunderstandings in potential relationships and even prevents potentially awkward situations where friends try and hook you up… Believe me, that sort of thing isn’t fun for anyone involved!

But pride? I’m not so sure that should be something you should concern yourself with. It’s a bit like being proud of your ethnic or national history; it just seems like another little thing that us humans do to set us apart from each other rather than bring us closer together.

I would, however, recommend going to meetups if you feel alone because it… I mean, as an asexual in a highly sexual world it can feel a little lonely because folks (even religious ones, saving themselves for marriage) often can’t seem to understand the concept of not wanting to bump uglies. Sort of wish I had 'em growing up.