You should probably tell your mother not to come at this point. It sounds as if it would give your husband much peace of mind, besides after reading your posts I don’t think your mother needs much to start attacking him anyway. The worst thing that will happen is she will give you an earful about him, in which case you politely end the conversation and it’s about time you did that. You should not expect your husband to put up with her for two weeks because you cannot stand up to her in a conversation, that’s not fair.
This is sad, I am very sorry for you. Your mom has convinced you that by showing your husband love and respect that you are allowing yourself to be controlled by him this false. It is not false to show respect for your spouse and give them a “heads up” about things.
Tell your mother you love her, tell your mother that you respect her, tell your mother you want to be a part of her life forever…however tell your mother you do not want to hear her insult your husband anymore, and if she does then you will politely END the conversation. Next time your mother calls your husband controlling tell her “mother I am sorry I have to end the conversation now, I love you talk to you later” and end the conversation. The result will be, well, she will probably think your husband is controlling you! However at least you will be proud of yourself for standing your ground and you will have some much deserved PEACE when speaking to her!
You cannot change your mother, all you can do is back away. And you are wrong by saying you are in the middle, you are not in the middle your loyalties are and should be with your husband. Unless your husband is a manipulative and vicious person that you should consider separation, divorce and annulment from then your loyalties lie with HIM. It is so hard I know, she raised you so you probably grew up with different ideas of right and wrong and loyalty and what controlling meant and how to treat people. From your short description of her your mother sounds pretty difficult. Please be assured of my prayers. God bless you.
