Others more confident of your vocation than you are?

[DL82]

Can anyone else identify with this?

I say I am thinking about going to visit a religious congregation, other people immediately assume I’m going to be a priest, they tell me how great it is, they’re really encouraging.

People introduce me with “this is David, he’s going to the Salesians”, even though I’m only going to stay with them for a few months, I’m not actually joining. Other people tell me I’d be a great priest, that they could see it before I even said it. They keep telling me how great it is that there are still young people going into religious life.

If I could stop listening to my own doubts and just listen to all the people who seem to be so enthusiastic about my ‘vocation’, I wouldn’t have any problems at all. Unfortunately, I still have a desire to be in control of my own life, to discern my vocation based on my own feelings when I talk to God, not on other people’s feelings who don’t have to live it themselves.

 

[Bob_Crowley]

Can anyone else identify with this?

I say I am thinking about going to visit a religious congregation, other people immediately assume I’m going to be a priest, they tell me how great it is, they’re really encouraging.

People introduce me with “this is David, he’s going to the Salesians”, even though I’m only going to stay with them for a few months, I’m not actually joining. Other people tell me I’d be a great priest, that they could see it before I even said it. They keep telling me how great it is that there are still young people going into religious life.

If I could stop listening to my own doubts and just listen to all the people who seem to be so enthusiastic about my ‘vocation’, I wouldn’t have any problems at all. Unfortunately, I still have a desire to be in control of my own life, to discern my vocation based on my own feelings when I talk to God, not on other people’s feelings who don’t have to live it themselves.

The ball’s in your court, and always will be in one sense.

If God wants you to become a priest or religious, He’ll let you know. Bear in mind however that often He speaks through other people.

But the decision must be yours.

In this case however, your “Yes” or “No” is critical.

 

[CarmeliteGirl25]

I’ve dealt with this issue before. When I decided to do a stay with the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus for a month and a half, I (and everyone else) was so sure that I would be accepted. My mom told me I was a shoe-in for the order since they were very inviting of me. I ended up leaving after 3 days because it was not what I was looking for. I needed more contemplation and an order that did not care for children. Of course, my mom and dad were very upset with me because they thought I had ruined my chances of getting accepted and I had wasted my vocation. I was at peace with my decision, but I had to endure the humiliation for about a month after returning home. Now, they’ve accepted that I don’t belong there but my mom is not sure about my vocation anymore, even though I’ve told her it’s the only thing in my life that makes perfect sense.

My advice to you is–don’t worry about what other people are saying. Whether it’s good or bad, only you can determine what is right for you. If you aren’t ready, don’t do it. Don’t follow your vocation to please someone else. Follow it to please God. He is the only thing that matters. If you enter somewhere just to please someone else and you know it’s not the right place, you will never be happy. Take baby steps. Forget about people rushing you along. It doesn’t matter if they seem sure. If you are not sure, it will not work.

God bless you!

 

[lpp]

When I first started to discern my vocation, I had the same doubts. People around me were telling me I’ll be a great nun, or that my personality fits one perfectly. My mom also told me that she always wanted at least one of her children to become a religious, all of her children if possible. I didn’t want to become a nun just to meet others expectation, especially my mom. It took a while for me to really know whether I am being called or not. I am happy to say that I’ve finally made a decision and it’s not to meet anyone expectation, but because I truly desire to do so. Of course, it took a lot of praying and talking to God to help me separate someone else’s expectations and my desire. All I can say is to pray, make visits to a religious community, and talk to a spiritual director if possible. I did these (not talking to the spiritual director though, a few nuns, yes) and they really helped in my discernment.

 

[datingtrappists]

I completely understand this! There have been a few people at church I barely know who have told me they can see me as a nun. When mentioned I was visiting a convent the last week of June, I was asked when I was joining by my priest, and he jokingly said he’d visit me after they accepted me (and he indicated they would keep me after just the week). When I’ve mentioned that I tend to like to have things in black in white, my priest said “Oh, like the Trappistine habits!”

I am having serious doubts about whether or not I even have a vocation, especially the past few months. The one thing I can say is regardless I have one or not, I need to go back to college for at least a bachelors, so at this point in my life, I’m focusing on my studies (I am starting back school after a 4 year long “semester break” next week). I also know that I want to pursue music, especially with singing and choir directing, and that whether I am a lay faithful or a religious, my musical gifts can be used for either.

I am very blessed because my Church family is very supportive in my walk with God, and will pray for and encourage me whatever path God leads me. I am very blessed to have my priest as my regular confessor and spiritual director. Though he can be a bit harsh with advise, for me, I need to have the occasional “slaps in the head”. He is very encouraging, even with the somewhat painful wake-up calls.