Our Father "Habits" During Mass

[Ohana]

Much ado about not very much. I agree, this is a distraction. Deleting this thread from my list.

 

[brgregmack]

Holding hands during the Lord’s Prayer is a spontaneous local custom that is fine so long as it is not required. Jimmy Akin, in his Mass Revision notes:

One of the most commonly asked questions concerns the holding of hands during the Our Father. The Holy See has not ruled directly on this issue. In response to a query, however, the Holy See noted that holding hands “is a liturgical gesture introduced spontaneously but on personal initiative; it is not in the rubrics.” For this reason, no one can be required to hold hands during the Our Father.

I have personally stopped. For a little while I continued when I’m with the choir, but that meant turning my back to the altar, so I’ve stopped. I’ve let them know my reasons for doing so, and move slightly so they can continue holding hands.

I do like what’s been said and would like to reiterate that this isn’t something we should bicker about.

 

[Dominique1234]

Hi there,

So I was just wondering is holding hands during the Our Father discouraged? You see my family is one of those that have always held hands during the Our Father during mass and I saw other families and individuals doing it so I’ve always thought it was okay. I never knew why I did it I just did it. I thought it was a ‘unity’ thing.

But, I’ve recently learned through different more conservative Catholics, priests and other really great Catholic friends of mine that this practice of holding hands is actually discouraged. I’ve also done some personal research and found the same results. I used to hold my hands up during the Our Father even without my parents, but now I’ve stopped. Instead I just fold my hands together.

While I don’t do this when I am at mass myself, when I am with my parents it’s totally different. I really want to stop this practice, mainly because now I’m uncomfortable doing it knowing that it’s discouraged. But at the same time, I also feel uncomfortable talking to my parents about it. I’m still a teenager only 16 and I don’t want to seemingly disrespect them by not wanting to hold hands any longer. However, I feel distracted with the action now and can’t seem to focus fully during the Our Father at mass because of this.

Maybe there’s just something wrong with how I perceive this and shouldn’t make a big deal about it. . .but I’m not sure.

Any advice on how to deal with this or to confront my parents?

I would ask your family to do the research on it as well.Maybe even have them speak to a Catholic Priest you trust enough to help them see what you understand. From my understanding, holding hands, according to Cardinal Arinze, is definitely discouraged because if you hold hands with one person, shouldn’t you hold everyones hands to create the unity aspect of the situation?There is absolutely no need for physical contact during a prayer. He does not have, although, a particular stance on raising your hands.

But I’ve also read about raising your hands in supplication to God during the Pater Noster is only allowed by the priest.This is part of the Rubrics of the Mass. It says so in the Missal. It is actually called the Orans posture. Only the Priest has the authority to do the Orans Posture during the Our Father because he is doing so in supplication for the Congregation. For US. He does it FOR US. Even the Deacon isn’t allowed to do it.So my understanding is that if the deacon is not allowed to do it, why should a lay person be allowed to do it? Some will want to contradict this teaching by saying that it says nothing to the effect that the congregation can’t do it as well. If we’re speaking of unity, then there isn’t any if everyone is doing something different.

Some will also say the important thing is to be in unity while saying the Our Father, which I agree with completely. But following Church rules is also important. This is why we kneel when we kneel, we stand when we stand, and we sit when we sit.

Hope this helps a little.

Dom

 

[Dominique1234]

No, actually, it isn’t discouraged.

Funny, I notice that people keep speaking in the passive voice here. Obviously, that’s because writing in the ordinary active voice would require them to try to decide who is doing all this discouraging. Somehow “Internet kibbitzers discourage it” wouldn’t have quite the same force to it as the faceless, ambiguous “It is discouraged” does.

No, that’s not true at all. And the Roman Missal has absolutely no comment whatsoever on use of the orans posture by members of the congregation.

Holding hands IS discouraged.

•Sacrosanctum Concilium art. 22.3 (1963)
o Therefore no other person, even if he be a priest, may add, remove, or change anything in the liturgy on his own authority.

•Canon 846.1 (1983)
o The liturgical books approved by the competent authority are to be faithfully observed in the celebration of the sacraments; therefore no one on personal authority may add, remove or change anything in them.

•Catechism of the Catholic Church, 1125 (1992)
o For this reason no sacramental rite may be modified or manipulated at the will of the minister or the community. Even the supreme authority of the Church may not change the liturgy arbitrarily, but only in obedience of faith and with religious respect for the mystery of the liturgy.

•General Instruction of the Roman Missal, no. 24 (2003)
o Nevertheless, the priest must remember that he is the servant of the Sacred Liturgy and that he himself is not permitted, on his own initiative, to add, to remove, or to change anything in the celebration of Mass.

•Redemptionis Sacramentum, nos. 31, 59 (2004)
o They ought not to detract from the profound meaning of their own ministry by corrupting the liturgical celebration either through alteration or omission, or through arbitrary additions.
o The reprobated practice by which Priests, Deacons or the faithful here and there alter or vary at will the texts of the Sacred Liturgy that they are charged to pronounce, must cease. For in doing thus, they render the celebration of the Sacred Liturgy unstable, and not infrequently distort the authentic meaning of the Liturgy

If you are to say, “there is nothing mentioning gestures”… then answer me this. Are gestures not part of the liturgy? (Orans posture only the priest is allowed to do i.e.)

We are not to add or remove anything. Period. Rules are rules. Who says I can’t stand when everyone sits then? I don’t want to sit, I want to stand. This is where it’s leading to. Next thing you know, we’ll have liturgical dance because there’s no rule against it…

 

[Dominique1234]

If you would have followed my link you would have known where I got it from.

Even with your more"acurate translation" It says what I bolded that same thing. It is not proper to carry out the gestures(oran position). I agree that Peggy Fry Catholic Answers Apologist quoted the wrong document but it doesn’t make her answer wrong.

In the end it does not equate to there being no prohibition or document against using the oran position. Simpy not true.

Thank you for making these facts clear! It truly bothers me when there are some who just pick and choose what they want and ignore the entire rule. Aren’t those called cafeteria catholics?

They are in my prayers… God bless you for speaking the ENTIRE truth.

 

[mdgspencer]

The practice of holding hands is not discouraged by the Church, though from what you say it is discouraged by some of your acquaintances. I too have heard of reasons against holding hands during mass, but the Church itself has never adopted them. So I consider a matter of the individual’s own decision. Holding hands is not a part of the liturgy, so this does not change the liturgy; it is irrelevant to the liturgy like where you sit in the church.
Personally, I would not hold hands with strangers, though I do with my wife. I only am against holding hands with someone you never met before in the area when they try to compel you to do this.
In the U.S. of course I have been at mass where everyone is expected to hold hands then, which I simply consider not a part of the mass, and I have even been at mass where a liberal priest orders everyone there to hold hands. I live in the Philippines now where there is sanity in this regards, though, still people very often hold hands with their family members. Here people respect your personal space, particularly that of women.

 

[ContactR3ality]

My bet is that you’re uncomfortable holding hands with your parents period, since you are approaching adulthood. When you have kids you will know how significant holding hands with them is. I hold hands with my dad when I’m lucky enough to be at mass with him (once every few years since he lives so far away) - that’s 500lbs of man-flesh holding hands right there! If my brother the deacon is on my other side of me at mass then there’s over 800lbs of manly men holding hands and praying together!

Why do I hold his hands when praying to “Our Father”? Because they are the hands that worked to provide food for the table and a roof for our heads, that wiped my bottom, bathed me, fed me, corrected me from time to time, and taught me to drive, and arm-wrestled with me when I was bigger.

I’ll be honest. I’m a little appalled, once I rec’d this email, that the assumption is that I’m uncomfortable holding hands with my parents merely because I am approaching adulthood.

I was honestly asking a question about what the church taught and, frankly, holding hands in public or showing affections such as hugs or whatever with my family has never been an issue for me. I have always been very close to them.

I appreciate the answer, but, frankly, the assumption instituted in it is a little insulting to me and my integrity. I wouldn’t ask this question if it was because I was uncomfortable holding hands with my parents. That is pointless and would be deceptive from my side as, in that case, my search would be purely focused on an answer that justifies not holding hands with my family in public. Which was not my intention in the slightest.