Overwhelmed. Please advise

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Hey! Welcome!

As a convert myself (they say we are on fire!), I want to tell you about the absolute Joy I receive from Reconciliation. I use a small booklet, An Adult’s Guide to Confession, to help me examine my conscience. As others have said, it’s those actions you commit willingly and with full knowledge of their sinfullness that you must address. Other imperfections are our failings. I mention them more for my own instruction than beating myself up for being sinful. This way, the next time I find myself leaning toward those actions, I stop and re-evaluate, because I have voiced those concerns out loud. We, as humans, are not perfect, nor will we ever be. The point is to strive toward perfection, not to be a perfectionist with ourselves or others. That’s Pharisaical and unproductive. You have to look at God as our loving Father. You wouldn’t berate your child for minor infractions, merely give him strong/loving guidance. That is the purpose of Reconciliation. To reconcile ourselves with God our Father.

Blessings!
 
((((((((ThanksB2Him))))))))))…first and foremost-always remember God loves you-He has faith in YOU…and He knows your heart and intent…if you strive to be the best human(remember to err is human,to forgive is Divine)and to emulate the words and direction of Jesus Christ-then feel blessed not overwhelmed-you are being led on a journey of Faith by the Father,Son and Holy Spirit-embraced by the Blessed Mother -all through the love of God…do your best and be at peace…God loves you- welcome home…:signofcross: (((hugs))) God Bless
 
Hi. About ThanksB2Him. You are wonderful !! In just the perfect place. A really simple thing I do is say 10 things I am grateful for and then 10 Hail Mary s. It works magic for me. Bless you.
 
A simple act would be to say “O MY GOD, I am sorry for having offended Thee, because I love Thee.” or recite the Act of Contrition at the end of each day. As noted focus on the love of God rather than sin.
 
The great danger with ‘discerning sin’ is to not let emotions get in the way of facts. Emotions can be good things…or bad…depending upon their source. God can use emotions…but they can also cause us harm if we become dependent upon them.

That being said, I’m sure that you’ve been instructed in your RCIA training about the 3 conditions for a sin – to be a sin. Use these 3 conditions as a form of spiritual litmus strips in order to determine – OBJECTIVELY (not subjectively!) – whether your action was, in truth, sinful.

Also, as a soon-to-be Catholic you will have been taught the Apostles Creed. Remember, in there is a little phrase…“I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints, the FORGIVENESS OF SINS, the resurrection of…” Well, there is a reason why this phrase is included in this beautiful statement of our faith: it’s true!

When you go to the sacrament of Reconciliation (us 'ol timers call it “confession”) and you make an honest and good confession of your sins…you must believe that THEY ARE FORGIVEN. Otherwise, why would you waste your time in the confessional? Remember, it was Jesus who set it up that way when He gave His apostles (the first bishops) the authority to forgive sins.

So…when it comes to discernment of whether you’ve commited a sin or not, just put your ‘emotions’ away from you and simply judge it on the 3 condition rule. Also…when it comes to discernment of whether you’ve been forgiven for your sins – or not – just remember the Apostles Creed.

And…relax and enjoy! The Catholic faith is a wonderful place to be!!! 🙂
 
Oh…if only everyone could be a perfect as me! Alas!

I thought I was wrong once…but I was mistaken.:angel1:
 
There seem to be two tendencies in morality. One is to treat morality as a series of rules; that is, to approach morality from a legalistic (rule), minimalistic (did I follow the rule; was I close enough?) and negativistic (I didn’t do anything wrong specifically, so I must be ok) approach.

The other seems to be to treat morality from an emotional standpoint - I meant well, so I must not have committed a sin.

The first so focuses on rules, that actions become centered around and totally focused on the rule itself; did I break a rule; did I only break it a bit; I didn’t break it so I must be morally good. It gives precedence to the rule, rather than seeing that the rule is to lead us somewhere else.

The latter wants to ignore that rules have meaning, and our choices have consequences.

The comment earlier in the thread - the three parts to knowing if I have sinned - are correct; The matter must be serious; I must know it is serious, and I must intend the act. But while it is correct, it is not complete.

Morality is about a whole lot more than just rules. Morality, if we go back to Christ’s answer and look at it carefully, (what is the greatest commandment? Christ’s answer - love God with your whole heart… and the second, love your neighbor as yourself), will show that morality is more than just about rules; it is about our relationship with God, and with one another. It has been said that one cannot commit a sin against any one of the commandments and not impact the other nine, as they are all inter-related. Another way of saying it is that a sin against your neighbor is also a sin against loving yourself; and that in turn is a sin against loving God. Loving God is not an emotion; it is a choice; and loving neighbor, and correctly understanding the concept of loving self is about right relationship between you, God and neighbor.

Rules are there because we need the guidance they provide; they are like the edge and the yellow line on the highway. To proceed properly, we need to say on the highway between the edge and the yellow line; but they are there for another purpose, and that is, to reach our destination. We can focus so thoroughly on the edge and the yellow line that we forget that we are on the highway to go somewhere (to union with God). And we can ignore the rules about staying on the highway between the two, to our peril. We can’t get to God by running off the edge, or over the line (that makes for head-on collisions and an absolute failure to get to the end of the highway). We need to follow the rules; but they are there for a purpose; they are not there to trap us but to guide us. Or as I say, God is not out to get you; He did not give us the rules so He could play “Gotcha!”.

It is easy to get so focused on the rules that we forget why we have them. All of them have reasons; and the primary reason is to get us to our ultimate goal - union with God.
 
My coworkers whom are ex-catholics and now in protestant churches, or not practicing, say it’s the ‘fire and brimstrone’ approach and leaves people feeling gloomy about themselves
You know, I’m almost 60, and in my ENTIRE spiritual experience, from Baptist with Church of Christ trimmings through Charismatic to Eastern Catholic, I’ve never heard fire and brimstone from ANYWHERE!

Sometimes, I’ve felt what some churches needed was a good five-cent stick of brimstone.
 
WOW!😃

I had not checked this in awhile and look at all the support. Thanks everyone, I know I am home. The Catholic Church is beautiful. The sacraments are beautiful. I wan’t to participate in the eucharist so much it hurts. Only 1.5 months or so.

I wish my friends could find the Church. It has brought me peace with my past and happiness.

Dave
 
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