Pam Stenzel - No Screwing Around

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Has anyone had any experience with this? It’s supposed to be an abstinence til marriage movie/speaker, but I think there is a lot of ABC discussed. Any information would be helpful.

Here is the web site if you are interested:
pamstenzel.com/Home.aspx

they have this as part of “health” class at our local H.S. and I would like more information before I pull her out of the class.

Thanks!
 
MomaMary8 said:
Has anyone had any experience with this? It’s supposed to be an abstinence til marriage movie/speaker, but I think there is a lot of ABC discussed. Any information would be helpful.

Here is the web site if you are interested:
pamstenzel.com/Home.aspx

they have this as part of “health” class at our local H.S. and I would like more information before I pull her out of the class.

Thanks!
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From what I understand it promotes abstinence. What makes you think it discusses ABC?
 
MomaMary8 said:
Has anyone had any experience with this? It’s supposed to be an abstinence til marriage movie/speaker, but I think there is a lot of ABC discussed. Any information would be helpful.

Here is the web site if you are interested:
pamstenzel.com/Home.aspx

they have this as part of “health” class at our local H.S. and I would like more information before I pull her out of the class.

Thanks!
Click to expand...
I am finding a lot of references to abstinence on her website - usually that does not signal someone who recommends contraception as a preventative. Here’s the description of “No Screwing Around” -

f you like ‘Sex has a Price Tag/Time to Wait for Sex’, you’ll love ‘Sex Ed- No Screwing Around’. Sex Ed is a unique product that showcases testimonies of students and a newly married couple as well as Pam Stenzel and other counseling professionals that deal with the struggles teens face in relationships. This video is an engaging, magazine style production that is great to use in your classroom** to generate discussion about the importance of abstinence until marriage.** It also comes with a teachers guide. Running time: 30 minutes. Released: 2005
 
I have seen her in person and have a borrowed DVD. She is blunt and not only talks about abstinence because of the value we have as people created in the image of God but the more practical proof that Abstinence prevents stds and broken hearts.

She is funny but straight. I highly recommend her. I do not believe I heard her speak anything against Catholic teaching. I think she is Catholic as well. She absolutely rocked, in my book.

She was direct and charitable.

No complaints here!

Oh and she works in a pregnancy center…the pro life kind.
 
One of the DVDs she sells deals with the issue of abortion being justified in the case of rape. She doesn’t have any specifically Catholic references on her website, but there are few denominations that will take a stand against abortion EVEN in the case of rape.

Except In Cases of Rape
  • I see she does have a link to David Hajduk, who is a Catholic theologian.
 
You may be mistaken. I think she was a product of a rape, so if my memory is correct, I believe she is against it in that instance too.
 
yes, on her website you will read that she is a product of that and is prolife all around.
 
mamaslo said:
You may be mistaken. I think she was a product of a rape, so if my memory is correct, I believe she is against it in that instance too.
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You are correct about that. I have her VHS tape for quite some time, and have shared it with many others.
 
mamaslo said:
You may be mistaken. I think she was a product of a rape, so if my memory is correct, I believe she is against it in that instance too.
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I’m not stating myself very clearly today, this is the 2nd time I have had to go back and correct what I wrote. What meant to say is that she is obviously AGAINST abortion in any case, INCLUDING that of rape. The DVD must deal with that very difficult subject that few denominations want to deal with - that of supporting the woman instead of urging an abortion in the case of rape. But to even have a DVD about it shows that she is very Catholic in her viewpoint, assuming she’s not a Catholic.
 
its ok. this forum stuff can get complicated with all these words and thoughts we are trying to convey. I am still looking but I may be in trouble some place else. 😉
 
mamaslo said:
I have seen her in person and have a borrowed DVD. She is blunt and not only talks about abstinence because of the value we have as people created in the image of God but the more practical proof that Abstinence prevents stds and broken hearts.

She is funny but straight. I highly recommend her. I do not believe I heard her speak anything against Catholic teaching. I think she is Catholic as well. She absolutely rocked, in my book.

She was direct and charitable.

No complaints here!

Oh and she works in a pregnancy center…the pro life kind.
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Great! Thank you for the information. What is the name of the DVD you have? Is it the one that she deals with rape and abortion?

I’m really trying to find out the most I can. My dd is very sensitive and even the discussion of these issues make her cringe, so a movie in a class room may just send her over the edge! This is a big reason why I believe parents should be the ones to teach these things! ABC is also discussed in the class and my dd has a bit of an understanding of the abortafacient aspect of some of the ABC and she almost cried when I described how a fertilized egg can be shed from the body. Since I knew both topics (the movie and ABC) were a part of the class, I thought there may be a chance the movie mentions or advocates ABC in marriage. I know I can pull my daughter out of certain class days, but I don’t want to over react. I want to keep a cool head and educate myself and be ready to discuss things with her as she goes through this.

Thanks again. any info you may have or experiences to share, I’d love to hear them!
 
MomaMary8 said:
Great! Thank you for the information. What is the name of the DVD you have? Is it the one that she deals with rape and abortion?

I’m really trying to find out the most I can. My dd is very sensitive and even the discussion of these issues make her cringe, so a movie in a class room may just send her over the edge! This is a big reason why I believe parents should be the ones to teach these things! ABC is also discussed in the class and my dd has a bit of an understanding of the abortafacient aspect of some of the ABC and she almost cried when I described how a fertilized egg can be shed from the body. Since I knew both topics (the movie and ABC) were a part of the class, I thought there may be a chance the movie mentions or advocates ABC in marriage. I know I can pull my daughter out of certain class days, but I don’t want to over react. I want to keep a cool head and educate myself and be ready to discuss things with her as she goes through this.

Thanks again. any info you may have or experiences to share, I’d love to hear them!
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The one we borrowed is called “sex has a pricetag” I believe. I saw her in person so I didn’t watch it but my prolife, and pro chastity dd did and she likes her boldness. She talks about how she gets these girls in the clinic where she works and they would say “whew, at least I am not pregnant!” and she would reply "honey, you can live through pregnancy but one encounter with the wrong person and you could become sterile or worse for the rest of your life. " Then she gets into all of the stds, hpvs (and also is not an advocate for the 4 strands the innoculation is supposed to prevent out of so many hpv viruses. She lays it out, and uses humor too. Your daughter may be embarrassed but watch it with her anyway. Pam Stenzel has a website. Check with your youth pastor there may be a copy around the church too. She does visits to youth groups too.
 
mamaslo said:
The one we borrowed is called “sex has a pricetag” I believe. I saw her in person so I didn’t watch it but my prolife, and pro chastity dd did and she likes her boldness. She talks about how she gets these girls in the clinic where she works and they would say “whew, at least I am not pregnant!” and she would reply "honey, you can live through pregnancy but one encounter with the wrong person and you could become sterile or worse for the rest of your life. " Then she gets into all of the stds, hpvs (and also is not an advocate for the 4 strands the innoculation is supposed to prevent out of so many hpv viruses. She lays it out, and uses humor too. Your daughter may be embarrassed but watch it with her anyway. Pam Stenzel has a website. Check with your youth pastor there may be a copy around the church too. She does visits to youth groups too.
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Thank you. It is sounding more and more like I need to keep her out the day the movie is shown. She is already scared by the idea of sex, and to have all those negative portrayals shown will not help her view. I would prefer this topic to come up when she is ready, but for know I’ll have to concentrate on putting out fires and help explain what all the kids are talking about. 😦
 
MomaMary8 said:
Thank you. It is sounding more and more like I need to keep her out the day the movie is shown. She is already scared by the idea of sex, and to have all those negative portrayals shown will not help her view. I would prefer this topic to come up when she is ready, but for know I’ll have to concentrate on putting out fires and help explain what all the kids are talking about. 😦
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Wow, how old is your daughter? Mine didn’t see or the video until recently and she is 16. You are your daughter’s first teacher and you know her better than anyone. I do not recommend it too early. Like my son who is 10, is ready for some things but I am discerning as well, to find the right thing for a young man. He already knows to avert his eyes when the world and Victorias Secret forces it on him. He says “not looking, not looking…”. I praise him for that.

Most boys seem to get introduced to the junk that hooks them into sin and addiction from a “harmless” look at something forbidden. I am worried so much for my son. Telling him to take a cold shower isn’t enough. He needs to be equipped, and hold all that energy for a one true love. Someone who will cherish him and who he can make sacrifices for…unless he is called to become a priest.

he loves babies, which is so nice to see. His heart melts. So maybe I can use his natural love for Children to teach him. then later more direct formation.

My daughter is outspoken and is trying to balance her attitude with the ones of her peers, and trying to learn to not throw rocks because her chastity is important to herself. Curiosity and zero training from my mom…except for “don’t do it until you are married” . She was probably waiting for me to ask her…don’t do that. You be proactive, but discern what she is ready for. The public school kids will give her more than enough initiation and she needs to be ready for that too. My daughter tells me what she sees in the hallways, it is just gross. We only have a k-8 catholic school here. It doesn’t protect from everything but it is way better even with the problems it does have.

So we are in the same boat, you find a way to teach her before unauthorized visitors do. But as she is ready to protect her own chastity.

You are a good mom.
 
mamaslo said:
Wow, how old is your daughter? Mine didn’t see or the video until recently and she is 16. You are your daughter’s first teacher and you know her better than anyone. I do not recommend it too early. Like my son who is 10, is ready for some things but I am discerning as well, to find the right thing for a young man. He already knows to avert his eyes when the world and Victorias Secret forces it on him. He says “not looking, not looking…”. I praise him for that.

Most boys seem to get introduced to the junk that hooks them into sin and addiction from a “harmless” look at something forbidden. I am worried so much for my son. Telling him to take a cold shower isn’t enough. He needs to be equipped, and hold all that energy for a one true love. Someone who will cherish him and who he can make sacrifices for…unless he is called to become a priest.

he loves babies, which is so nice to see. His heart melts. So maybe I can use his natural love for Children to teach him. then later more direct formation.

My daughter is outspoken and is trying to balance her attitude with the ones of her peers, and trying to learn to not throw rocks because her chastity is important to herself. Curiosity and zero training from my mom…except for “don’t do it until you are married” . She was probably waiting for me to ask her…don’t do that. You be proactive, but discern what she is ready for. The public school kids will give her more than enough initiation and she needs to be ready for that too. My daughter tells me what she sees in the hallways, it is just gross. We only have a k-8 catholic school here. It doesn’t protect from everything but it is way better even with the problems it does have.

So we are in the same boat, you find a way to teach her before unauthorized visitors do. But as she is ready to protect her own chastity.

You are a good mom.
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My dd is 15.5, but is still very innocent. The Catholic schools here are little better than the public schools, and at least at the public my dd won’t be confused with mixed messages coming from people who are supposed to be teaching church truths.

Sadly, my dd sees all the twisted things about sex and “health” class seems to emphasize protection from STD’s unwanted pregnancies and rape. She sees the culture at large, and it scares her. She is also asked often if her baby brother is her baby, which is doubly insulting. I know at the moment she wishes she could be a consecrated single, but there is a long way to go in her maturity level. I don’t want her to think her vocation is to be single because she is scared of a sexual relationship. 😦

As for boys, you are right to be concerned. Images of women are every where and it seems to lead many into the world of pornography. Teaching a young man to respect the privacy of a woman even when she does not respect it is very difficult. They need to learn to treasure the female body and hold it to a high regard, and not as a play thing, but society is telling them differently at every turn.

It is not an easy job, but one we have to face head on. I also know that none of my kids will be the same and need the same lessons. I do not anticipate my 14 yo to have as much difficulty with this topic. She is a lot more easy going and doesn’t seem to be as deeply wounded when she sins in her classmates (it does bother her, and she has cried at times when friends have done things that were wrong, but just not as often as her older sis.)

Thanks again! Together we can be better parents! 🙂
 
Well, I guess for now, she is consecrated single. Have you seen the movie Courageous? There is a scene when one dad takes his daughter out to dinner and gives her a ring and makes the promise to be her number one guy and to help her find her way through this. (it was worded better in the movie.).

She probably needs to just feel safe. In our school we have pretty good folks doing a good job but we still have clicks and gossips, and bullying…not acceptable from the school but they do try.

There are good and bad things about public school…the pool for making friends who are more compatible and interests can grow is larger. The bad influence is bigger too. The bad language has been our worst thing. My dd will go through spells where she is bad with the language. But this year, she is taking ownership of her faith and that rocks let me tell you. She is open to confession and wants me to take her…I am the one who is having trouble with it now. so I need to get through this so I can help her get to heaven. My son too.

The best way to help make things better is to volunteer if you can. My daughter is a little activist. She is learning how to temper that but I like her tenacity in the matter.
 
That is great that your daughter is an activist type. Mine likes to say she is carrying out a “quiet apostolate” 🙂 She has made good friends and has encouraged some to have a more active roll in their faith. She is the one her friends go to for advice, Our school is a good one, but the modern scare tactics in teaching sexuality just backfires on her. Conferences are this week, so I’ll be sitting down with her teacher and having a chat about her sensitive nature and how much of this class is too much for her level of “maturity.”
 
“sex has a price tag” is a talk that can be viewed on YouTube, I believe it’s in 8 parts. I enjoyed it! She’s definitely Catholic.

The main difference between her and Jason evert would be that she is very much about raising awareness to the risk of premarital sex and ABC and less focused on the virtue of chastity, purity and “romance without regrets”. The message is essentially the same however. I prefer the Evert’s style but her talk is informative and educational as well.
 
I have never seen it… but unless I actually saw the video beforehand, I would not be ok with it. Even if she has the same goal (abstinence), the approach and reasoning behind it matters… It is good to let them know about STD’s etc etc… but that isn’t the main reason why they need to abstain (and I have no idea of what she says in the video, I am just talking about any sex ed in general). I read somewhere about how sexual education should never be done without including the moral aspect of it… I have no idea about what she includes in her talks, and they may indeed be wonderful, but even one “off” remark could affect a student negatively (from the video or the teacher presenting it).
 
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