Parents Hate Mass and Church

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cutiesmak

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About 10 years ago, my parents who are lifelong Catholics, decided to stop going to mass because they thought it was too liberal and run by hippies and they hated it. I found that out this past weekend, after thinking that they were just sleeping in all these years! My parents said that nothing at all good came from Vatican II (why not stop going to Mass in the 1960s then??), that they want everything to go back to Latin and that they can’t stand all this leftist liberal nonsense.

I’m like, “Uh, ok. But you still have to go to mass!” I mean, I’m not the best mass attendee, but I confess and I’m trying really hard and I know it’s sinful. I’m just upset and needed to vent. I have enough non-Catholics ripping on the Church without lifelong Catholics doing it too!

So… any suggestions to get them to understand how very important it is? I’m definitely praying for them, but I wish I could do something to get them to at least TRY! Like try a new parish or something.

They live in east of Cleveland, OH. (I live out of town.) Any suggestions for traditional parishes out there?

Thank you! Grumble… I’m just going to have to find the priest with the most booming voice I know and have him call them on the phone and yell at them… ; )
 
cutiesmak said:
About 10 years ago, my parents who are lifelong Catholics, decided to stop going to mass because they thought it was too liberal and run by hippies and they hated it. I found that out this past weekend, after thinking that they were just sleeping in all these years! My parents said that nothing at all good came from Vatican II (why not stop going to Mass in the 1960s then??), that they want everything to go back to Latin and that they can’t stand all this leftist liberal nonsense.

I’m like, “Uh, ok. But you still have to go to mass!” I mean, I’m not the best mass attendee, but I confess and I’m trying really hard and I know it’s sinful. I’m just upset and needed to vent. I have enough non-Catholics ripping on the Church without lifelong Catholics doing it too!

So… any suggestions to get them to understand how very important it is? I’m definitely praying for them, but I wish I could do something to get them to at least TRY! Like try a new parish or something.

They live in east of Cleveland, OH. (I live out of town.) Any suggestions for traditional parishes out there?

Thank you! Grumble… I’m just going to have to find the priest with the most booming voice I know and have him call them on the phone and yell at them… ; )
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Ask them this question. Why don’t you want to go to Mass or Church? Do you not believe that Jesus is truly present in the Eucharist? If you do, why don’t you go to Church and received the Lord?
 
I wonder if someone from east of Cleveland could reccomend a Latin Traditional mass? (Is it the Byzantine rite?) I’m not real sure… but I’m sure there are posters here who know. Perhaps your parents would be suprised to find out that the mass they knew in their youth still exists?
 
I just tried looking for a Latin Mass on the Cleveland Diocese website, but didn’t find anything. I also tried to see what I could find on Masstimes.org, but I’ve getting error messages there, so I’m unable to give you what you’re looking for, but I suggest you call the diocese directly at (800) 869-6525 and ask if there is a Latin Indult Mass in the area. Then, recommend that your parents give it a try.

And you are right, they need to get to confession and then start attending Mass on a weekly basis. Their souls depend on it!

God Bless,

CARose
 
This is another example of the price paid by many pre-VCII Catholics for the post VCII mayhem. I can really sympathize with your parents. It didn’t happen overnight, but the Latin Mass of the 60s is as alien to the NO mass in most American parishes today as to a Pentecostal service.

There’s always plenty of debate here about the details of liturgy, but what’s not discussed much is that the contemporary liturgy also changed the entire context of faith for many pre-VCII Catholics who had quiet reverence and devotion deeply ingrained in them. We “old timers” see a lot of selfishness in the way the traditional Mass and older practices were were pushed aside with no consideration. And we see a lot of superficiality and phoniness in the artificial “togetherness” of the NO. The Mass has lost its glory, mystery and sanctity and become almost childish in its banality. We half expect the Crucifix to be replaced by a cuddly teddy-bear one of these sundays.

Attending Mass has become a religious obligation in the true sense, because there’s little satisfaction in it. It is not the Mass we were taught, and the way its conducted requires we violate the things we learned when we were young. We don’t participate in it so much as we endure it.

All those tsk-tskers saying “How dare they!” would change their tunes if they were pressured into attending a service that assaulted their religious training and insulted their devotional sensiblities. The NO Mass has the same label, but is a very different article.

Try to find a Latin Mass in your area that your parents can attend. We try to go to a TLM once a month and its a marvelous, comforting event. There should be a number of them in city like Cleveland. I know there are websites that list churches where indulted Latin Mass said nationwide. You may be able to Google it.
 
Even though I want to throw up most the time from what I see at my parish, I go because Jesus is there. Ignore the ladies in inappropriate dresses, and all the rest, sit up front.

Even if they are horribly ignoring Him, He is there. This is just like the soldiers jeering at Him on the Cross. That doesn’t make Him not Jesus.

If all the faithful Catholics left and let the Church fill up with dancing nuns(without habits), EEMHC’s, singers etc would that do any good? All it would do is let them do worse stuff at Mass. We need to take back the Church and get in there and respectfully honor God. Catholics don’t run away, we are the Church Militant and need to act like it sometimes.

This doesn’t mean picketing and causing trouble but education and getting involved.

In Christ
Scylla
 
carol_marie said:
I wonder if someone from east of Cleveland could reccomend a Latin Traditional mass? (Is it the Byzantine rite?) I’m not real sure… but I’m sure there are posters here who know. Perhaps your parents would be suprised to find out that the mass they knew in their youth still exists?
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haven’t been in Cleveland for 8 yrs but Immaculate Conception used to have a Latin Mass and schola (east 55th area, don’t know if your folks want you down there). Have you ever tried the Maronite church near Jacobs field, or any of the Eastern rite churches (Parma and near west side, a long way to go). Holy Cross in Euclid used to be pretty orthodox but I can’t say. Having raised my kids in Diocese of Cleveland and experienced all manner of unorthodox liturgies and catechesis, I can sympathize with your parents, but in my estimation that is an excuse, not a reason, for ceasing Mass attendance.

SS Cosmas and Damien in Twinsburg is also quite conservative according to DD who lives down that way, at least they do have Adoration, something foreign to a lot of Cleveland parishes.
 
cutiesmak said:
They live in east of Cleveland, OH. (I live out of town.) Any suggestions for traditional parishes out there?
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Tell them to try St. Albert the Great in North Royalton. I heard this is very traditional.
 
I don’t blame them. I am forced to go to NO masses and I can’t stand them (the way they are done in my area that is - not that mass itself). I feel like a Methodist rather than a Catholic. In my area I would probably find more reverence at an episcopal church. I can’t even find an Eastern Catholic church to escape to.

Anyways my rant aside these are indult masses for the Archdiocese of Cincinnati:

Sacred Heart Church
Fr. Herbert Raterman, SJ, Pastor
2733 Massachusetts Ave.
Cincinnati, OH 45225
(513) 541-4654
11:30 AM Sundays
7:00 PM Holydays

Our Lady of the Rosary Church, Dayton
Fr. Michael Holloran, Pastor
Website for Latin Mass Community
40 Notre Dame Ave.
Dayton, OH 45404
Rotating priests- Fr. M. Holloran, Fr. W. Fitzgerald, Fr. S. Mondeik and others
Contact Steve Derby, Coordinator for TLM information
(937) 427-5856
8:45 AM Sundays
7:00 PM Holydays

Eastern Catholic:

Ruthenian Catholic parishes in Ohio check this site out:
archeparchy.org/page/directories/directory-OH.htm

Check out the Ukrainians too:
stjosaphateparchy.org/ParishesOh.html
 
Oops I thought you said Cincinatti, these are indults for the diocese of cleveland:

Immaculate Conception Church
Fr. Frank G. Godic, Pastor
4129 Superior Ave.
Cleveland, OH 44103
(216) 431-5900
FAX: (216) 431-0463
12 Noon Sundays
6:30 PM Holydays
7:30 AM Wednesdays

St. Mary Church, Akron
Fr. Edward A. Burba, Pastor
750 S Main St
Akron, OH 44311
(330) 253-1233
(330) 762-9247
FAX: (330) 252-1768
Also contact the Fraternity of St. Peter in Vienna, OH for more info. about this Mass
1:00 PM 1st & 3rd Sundays
 
I’d just echo what most of the other folks here have said. Tell them they need to go for Jesus no matter what. Even in the worst of parishes, they’d have the opportunity to really really offer all things up for Christ and to make reparations to His Sacred Heart by the disposition of one’s own heart.

Also important to recognize that we are all sinners in need of the Savior. The fact that we have been given a certain grace to recognize such things as irreverance and what-not is a gift. Use it accordingly.

I’d also strongly recomment finding a traditional Latin mass close to your folks - hopefully an indult parish.

As an aside, I sometimes wonder how many of the Protestants we meet are lost children and grandchildren of the Great Exit of the post Vatican II era. A number I’ve talked with have parents (usually one or the other) who left after VII. It’s always used as “evidence” that the Catholic Church changes it’s teachings. That’s a tough one to get through when much of the Church at all levels often act like it did. Spirit of Vatican II and all.

Just rambling.

Peace in Christ,

DustinsDad
 
cutiesmak said:
About 10 years ago, my parents who are lifelong Catholics, decided to stop going to mass because they thought it was too liberal and run by hippies and they hated it. I found that out this past weekend, after thinking that they were just sleeping in all these years! My parents said that nothing at all good came from Vatican II (why not stop going to Mass in the 1960s then??), that they want everything to go back to Latin and that they can’t stand all this leftist liberal nonsense.

I’m like, “Uh, ok. But you still have to go to mass!” I mean, I’m not the best mass attendee, but I confess and I’m trying really hard and I know it’s sinful. I’m just upset and needed to vent. I have enough non-Catholics ripping on the Church without lifelong Catholics doing it too!

So… any suggestions to get them to understand how very important it is? I’m definitely praying for them, but I wish I could do something to get them to at least TRY! Like try a new parish or something.

They live in east of Cleveland, OH. (I live out of town.) Any suggestions for traditional parishes out there?

Thank you! Grumble… I’m just going to have to find the priest with the most booming voice I know and have him call them on the phone and yell at them… ; )
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Help them find a Tridentine Mass they can go to. Maybe the FSSP or ICRSS have apostolates in the area, or maybe there is a local indult.
 
cutiesmak said:
About 10 years ago, my parents who are lifelong Catholics, decided to stop going to mass because they thought it was too liberal and run by hippies and they hated it. I found that out this past weekend, after thinking that they were just sleeping in all these years! My parents said that nothing at all good came from Vatican II (why not stop going to Mass in the 1960s then??), that they want everything to go back to Latin and that they can’t stand all this leftist liberal nonsense.

I’m like, “Uh, ok. But you still have to go to mass!” I mean, I’m not the best mass attendee, but I confess and I’m trying really hard and I know it’s sinful. I’m just upset and needed to vent. I have enough non-Catholics ripping on the Church without lifelong Catholics doing it too!

So… any suggestions to get them to understand how very important it is? I’m definitely praying for them, but I wish I could do something to get them to at least TRY! Like try a new parish or something.

They live in east of Cleveland, OH. (I live out of town.) Any suggestions for traditional parishes out there?

Thank you! Grumble… I’m just going to have to find the priest with the most booming voice I know and have him call them on the phone and yell at them… ; )
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Those convinced against their will are of the same opinion still. You can’t shame them into going back to Mass. If they don’t want to, they won’t. People who don’t really want to go to Mass will always find an excuse. The Mass isn’t in Latin The priest is always asking for money (that’s a real popular excuse). The homosexual priest scandal. “I don’t need religion, I’m spiritual.” (Amazing how many people can be spiritual while sleeping in til 11 every Sunday morning. But I digress.)

Your poor, suffering parents don’t need their baby hectoring them about religion. Just drop it and pray. That’s my advice. :tiphat:
 
There’s also Latin Mass offered in Erie
ERIE Diocese Erie St. Ann Church W Sunday: 9:30 AM

And in Vienna, OH
Queen of the Holy Rosary Church W D Sunday: 8:00 AM & 10:00 AM
Weekdays: 7:30 AM & 9:00 AM Sat: 9:00 AM & 5:00 PM

You might share these with your parents, but if they don’t respond, I agree with Dr. Bombay’s advice to pray for them and not be a pest.
 
not having a Latin Mass available is no reason to miss Mass. If others in your family are not going, that does not exempt you from the obligation. The Mass is still the Mass as long as it is celebrated according to the norms. If every aspect is not to personal preference, the wise Catholic will offer that up for the intentions of those who are deprived of the Eucharist through no fault of their own. My parents also went through a period of years where they did not attend Mass regularly because they objected to many real abuses in problems in our parish. In my mother’s case, she was a convert and said the “new Mass” was not the Mass that led her into the Church. They are both gone now, may they rest in peace, and both fortunately were reconciled to the Church before death, and both admitted their reasons for staying away had a lot more to do with personal problems, failures and excuses than it did with the changes in the Mass.
 
Caesar said:
Help them find a Tridentine Mass they can go to. Maybe the FSSP or ICRSS have apostolates in the area, or maybe there is a local indult.
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attending a schismatic church does not meet a Catholic’s Sunday Mass obligation. The Mass is not subject to personal preference.
 
puzzleannie said:
attending a schismatic church does not meet a Catholic’s Sunday Mass obligation. The Mass is not subject to personal preference.
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Your definition of schismatic seems to be wrong. Both the FSSP and the ICRSS are congregations of priests in good standing with Rome. Otherwise I would not have mentioned them.
 
cutiesmak said:
About 10 years ago, my parents who are lifelong Catholics, decided to stop going to mass because they thought it was too liberal and run by hippies and they hated it. I found that out this past weekend, after thinking that they were just sleeping in all these years! My parents said that nothing at all good came from Vatican II (why not stop going to Mass in the 1960s then??), that they want everything to go back to Latin and that they can’t stand all this leftist liberal nonsense.

I’m like, “Uh, ok. But you still have to go to mass!” I mean, I’m not the best mass attendee, but I confess and I’m trying really hard and I know it’s sinful. I’m just upset and needed to vent. I have enough non-Catholics ripping on the Church without lifelong Catholics doing it too!

So… any suggestions to get them to understand how very important it is? I’m definitely praying for them, but I wish I could do something to get them to at least TRY! Like try a new parish or something.

They live in east of Cleveland, OH. (I live out of town.) Any suggestions for traditional parishes out there?

Thank you! Grumble… I’m just going to have to find the priest with the most booming voice I know and have him call them on the phone and yell at them… ; )
Click to expand...
God Bless your Parents.

They’re on fire with the faith.

This makes me think instantly of the faithful God-fearing Jews of Old. They were in exile, taken far away from their Temple. They were taken far away from the sacrifices they enjoyed in their youth.

Unfairly deprived of their birthright…the Mass of all Ages has been denied to them the way it should be presented. Crippled instead by those wolves in sheep’s clothing who claim to have the best of the Church in mind.

Point out to your Parents that they CANNOT live without the Eucharist. They must bring themselves to the Mass no matter how horribly celebrated it is. Tell them to be inspired by the Blessed Mother on Calvary.

She didn’t have a choice, she didn’t have another option. Her only option to be with Her Son was to watch his body be torn up by sinners. However She would rather suffer three long hours with her poor victimized son and Lord then be parted with him at that moment.

So with your parents, they should endure the problems with the new mass. And like Mary, watch the victim in the Host be torn with the liturgical abuses of that day. Then when they recieve communion…they can leave knowing that like Mary ever Virgin they withstood those long hours. They stayed by Christ through hardships.

As St. Josemaria Escriva said:

“More than in Bethlehem, More than on Calvary, More than anywhere else, Jesus humbles himself in the Host.”
 
Excuse me, but I would hardly call someone “on fire for the faith” who hasn’t been to Mass in 10 years. I would call them a disobedient fallen away Catholic. We are the laity and we are called to obedience. Jesus Christ is present in the new version of the Mass. It is what the hierarchy of the Church wants us to have at this point in time. We aren’t supposed to boycott it like petulant children, we are supposed to accept it.

It’s nice to try looking for a Mass to your parent’s liking, that’s very kind and helpful. But, I wonder, if they are as devout and traditional as you describe, why aren’t they seeking out the confessional on their own? They are in a serious state of sin missing Mass for so long for no good reason. 😦
 
St_John said:
Excuse me, but I would hardly call someone “on fire for the faith” who hasn’t been to Mass in 10 years. I would call them a disobedient fallen away Catholic. We are the laity and we are called to obedience. Jesus Christ is present in the new version of the Mass. It is what the hierarchy of the Church wants us to have at this point in time. We aren’t supposed to boycott it like petulant children, we are supposed to accept it.

It’s nice to try looking for a Mass to your parent’s liking, that’s very kind and helpful. But, I wonder, if they are as devout and traditional as you describe, why aren’t they seeking out the confessional on their own? They are in a serious state of sin missing Mass for so long for no good reason. 😦
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Ah…I totally missed that bit. My understanding of the OP was that their parents had been going to a NO mass for 10 years and then decided to quit. Upon re-reading I see that they are in a totally different situation. Thanks for pointing that out. Either way I still suggest what I suggested in my prior post.
 
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