Parents Oppose Ash Wednesday

  • Thread starter Thread starter kurt1
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
You can agree to disagree all you want and have your opinion, but if this is in the states (at lease where I"m at)…it’s the law.

If OP were paying rent, yes…that would create a little more grey area and open up some rights. Right now, it’s all on the owners of the domicile since there’s no rent in play… 🤷‍♂️
 
You’re looking at this from a legal standpoint as to who owns the home … I am looking at it totally as a spiritual matter … it seems he has written that he took the ashes off … so for this matter the issue is now moot.
 
waaaay too much to respond to here. but i did read everything and I thank you all for giving your thoughts and opinions 🙂 thank you!
btw my parents did actually recommend me to speak with our Sunday School teacher, whom they like more anyway 😁 and he and I had a four hour discussion about Catholicism in general. it doesn’t seem anybody in my family’s church has a unified belief about Catholicism because he was much more willing to accept parts of Catholicism after I explained them, and my parents were not at all.
also, my priest had a similar response when I asked about attending Mass if my parents would try to stop me as Katherine’s when she asked if she should join a convent despite her mother’s disapproval. he said since I’m 18 it is my choice to follow God or continue following my parents until I move out. he did add that I don’t need to rush, but also that if I’m certain the Church is correct, I’m more than welcome to join already (that is, in RCIA and attend).
and that did, for the record cause my parents to threaten to kick me out, and I would have willingly left, but they calmed down and never actually asked me to leave. I would love to move out already, but college is expensive and I can’t have much debt if i plan to later join the seminary.
 
Thank you St. Clare for you continued support and prayers for my family, finances, and future.
 
You were saying that just because he’s 18, he can do what he like and doens’t have to move out, etc…

We’re pointing out that it actually doesn’t work that way
 
No, I agree that he would have to move out if he wants to continue to do as he wants with his religion … but for that one time that night I am saying he was not dishonoring his parents to keep the ashes on … same as the priest told me I was not dishonoring my mother to enter a convent and listen to God.
 
I will keep you in my prayers … hoping that your parents don’t come between you and your entrance to the seminary … stay close with the priest that is helping you.
 
Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment .
 
The ashes are a reminder that we came from ashes and we will return to ashes.
It’s no big deal. If your parents feel strongly about this, do not defy them. Honor your parents’ wishes.
God bless you and your parents!!! 🙏
 
I would also point out I’m not just doing whatever I want and expecting them to still pay for my room here. as I’ve previously stated, I’ve only publicly shown my Catholicism twice. the first time was in late November, when I first attended Mass for the Rite of… Receiving(?) and they gave me a crucifix which they told me I should wear around my neck each Sunday at Mass, and told me if I later changed clothes and therefore the crucifix was under my clothes, then it would be fine, but I shouldn’t be ashamed of the crucifix and hide it otherwise. so I came home and they of course hated that I had a crucifix out. I immediately went to my room and changed clothes so it wasn’t visible. now it is late February and this is the only other time I’ve shown I’m Catholic, and it’s through ashes, which other denominations also practice. again I’ll repeat, I go out of my way to hide my Catholicism most of the time.
 
I think you should tell your parents that once you can afford to move out, you’re going to get a tattoo of the ashes on your forehead. 😆
See how they like that…
 
I hope that’s just a joke…

This should be taken quite seriously and carefully.

Scripture instructs us not to provoke anger

This is even told to fathers.

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
 
Last edited:
Ammi said:
I hope that’s just a joke…

This should be taken quite seriously and carefully.

Scripture instructs us not to provoke anger

This is even told to fathers.

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
Click to expand...
Does someone have to be in a position of power to provoke anger? Is it not provoking anger on the part of the parents to tell the kids to get rid of his ashes?
Is that making the kid feel discouraged?
 
Last edited:
Katherine438 said:
I understand what you are saying … but to me ashes are obligatory … that’s my own personal feelings … I feel obliged to get ashes and to wear them … I also don’t think it is very nice that parents can’t respect the feelings of one of their children. Also I do believe that wearing the ashes shows our love of the Lord.
Click to expand...
There is a scripture passage usually read on Ash Wednesday itself which says 'let your hearts be broken and not your garments torn". In other words the outward signs of penitence are unimportant - the inward attitude is what matters.

And there is a Gospel passage about how when we fast we shouldn’t walk around looking gloomy with long faces. Keeping visible ashes on the forehead all day for me comes close to the sort of prideful display Christ warned against.
 
Yes, I believe it is provoking a child to anger to criticize Catholic worship. And I would raise this to the Baptist preacher.

Yet we should still encourage honoring father and mother. And controlled anger.
 
Keeping ashes on all day for me signifies my love and respect for our Lord.

In addition, I am a sick woman, so no one but my husband sees the ashes all day … but I would be fine with people seeing them … we should be proud to be Catholics and want to show our love and respect for our Lord to all.

Fasting is something altogether different … that should be done privately.
 
Last edited:
There is a scripture passage usually read on Ash Wednesday itself which says 'let your hearts be broken and not your garments torn". In other words the outward signs of penitence are unimportant - the inward attitude is what matters.

I’ve never heard this scripture passage read on Ash Wednesday.
 
Ammi said:
Like I said… I’d have an open discussion with parents and Baptist pastor.

Keep it real simple, not a debate. Just make sure parents and pastor are on same page. They may be, but perhaps not.

And I’d look for my own place.

But if I am staying at their home, I’d ask them to wipe off the ashes when entering. And I would try to not have any attitude.
Click to expand...
If my kid pulled stunts like this over me asking him to not do something in my house that made me uncomfortable, then I would have to assume he had no interest in maitaining harmony with the adults who are paying his way. Very disrespectful, and out he would go.

Of course I raised my kid right, and she would never behave like that so it is a moot point for me. Thank God.
 
Katherine438 said:
The Church does not say that you have to obey your parents when they are going against your religion.
Click to expand...
This is attaching far too much importance to outward things.
Doesn’t the fact that attending Mass on Ash Wednesday isn’t required. let alone receiving ashes is not compulsory , show that we mustn’t allow ourselves to give ashes such importance, especially if it means we sin against charity?

Heavens, in some cultures the ashes ae sprinkled on the head so are not visible anyway.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top