J
Joseph73
Guest
My point is, do not deviate from Church teaching simply due to unfortunate circumstances. Always do what is right in the most objective sense. Lying is objectively wrong; therefore, don’t do it.
yes, my parents do practice Hinduism. my mom’s in this cult that’s a break off schism of ISKCON, and that seems to have made her very superstitious regarding other faiths. it’s very different from traditional Hinduism.Could you please tell me if your parents practice Hinduism?
I have an answer for you but please let me know first.
As I said before, YOU are not hurting your mother. Your mother is choosing to react the way she does. There can’t really be a compromise - either you believe the faith or you don’t, either you convert or you don’t, either you follow a belief system that your mom is content with or you don’t. Since you are an adult, you should do what you know to be right. The key is to be respectful of your mother. The way to do that is to be honest, but not pushy about your situation. So now that she knows, you don’t need to go over it again and again with her. You need to let her know that your love for her is just as great now as it was before, and that your desire to have a good relationship with her is just as great now as it was before. Show it in other ways, unrelated to religion. Redirect conversations away from the faith topic to topics that are not divisive. You can’t make her not feel bad, and you can’t keep her from overreacting to the point of physical ailment. That is her responsibility, and only she can decide how to react. She is more likely to cope well with this change if you don’t let her think that her reactions will cause you to change your mind - that would just be fueling the fire, and encouraging her to react more dramatically in the future. Instead, be a steady, calm, and loving presence, but be unphased by the emotional drama (at least in her presence). Don’t play the game, and it’s more likely to end.thanks everyone. i understand i should continue, but would God really be happy with me continuously hurting my mother? like is there an alternative compromise or something i could do?
Some of us aren’t called to defend the faith until later in life while others like yourself are faced with this call early.i’ve been attending rcia classes for the past 2 months, come from a hindu background, and am 20 years old (in college.) a little over a week ago i went back home for the weekend. finally decided to tell my parents about my decision to convert. they took it much worse than i thought, especially my mother. she was super upset, and cried a lot. which made me question if i was doing right or wrong, b/c i had never seen my mother that disappointed and upset in me. anyways, my mother told me to not go to church anymore. i told her i won’t just b/c she wouldn’t let me go back until i agreed. anyways, of course i went to church. when my mother asked me last night if i did, i didn’t want to lie, so i said yes i did. she yelled and cried a lot on the phone, said i wouldn’t be related to her and all, even though i explained everything as nicely as i could. so today i found out that she had been sick all day (blood pressure maybe) and when i talked to her on the phone today she sounded so sad and sick, and now i feel so terriblePreviously I decided to join the Church after being lost in depression for several years (that my parents didn’t know about) b/c i did really bad things before, due to which i also went through drugs, alcohol, suicidal thoughts etc. now all those thoughts are coming back, and i don’t know what to do, i feel like hurting myself for all this. i mean, i’m literally hurting my parents. And am losing a little faith. what should i do, should i continue with rcia/church? also please pray for my mother to get better, and pray that my parents understand. thank you.
I’m sorry to hear that you’re going through this. I’m a convert, so hopefully I can provide some helpful perspective. I have to preface it by saying that luckily, when I announced my conversion to my parents, they took it pretty well, almost a little too nonchalantly, in my opinion. Of course, that may have something to do with the fact that I didn’t tell them until after I converted.i’ve been attending rcia classes for the past 2 months, come from a hindu background, and am 20 years old (in college.) a little over a week ago i went back home for the weekend. finally decided to tell my parents about my decision to convert. they took it much worse than i thought, especially my mother. she was super upset, and cried a lot. which made me question if i was doing right or wrong, b/c i had never seen my mother that disappointed and upset in me. anyways, my mother told me to not go to church anymore. i told her i won’t just b/c she wouldn’t let me go back until i agreed. anyways, of course i went to church. when my mother asked me last night if i did, i didn’t want to lie, so i said yes i did. she yelled and cried a lot on the phone, said i wouldn’t be related to her and all, even though i explained everything as nicely as i could. so today i found out that she had been sick all day (blood pressure maybe) and when i talked to her on the phone today she sounded so sad and sick, and now i feel so terriblePreviously I decided to join the Church after being lost in depression for several years (that my parents didn’t know about) b/c i did really bad things before, due to which i also went through drugs, alcohol, suicidal thoughts etc. now all those thoughts are coming back, and i don’t know what to do, i feel like hurting myself for all this. i mean, i’m literally hurting my parents. And am losing a little faith. what should i do, should i continue with rcia/church? also please pray for my mother to get better, and pray that my parents understand. thank you.
I can see that you do not know how things work here.Thank you for your advice, have a Merry Christmas and a blessed New Year.
Dear Friend in Christ!Hi everyone,
This post has been very insightful, thank you all for your advice. I too am struggling with the exact same issue. I know that as in Luke 14:26 and 12:52-53 we are to choose Jesus over any person, relationship or religion, but the hurt, especially to my mother in this case, is difficult. The difference in my case however, is not a conversion to Catholicism, but away from it. I am a 56 year-old cradle Catholic and have struggled with theological questions about the Church for years. I tried to talk to my dad about it when he was still alive, and to my cousin (a priest) as well, but they both seemed offended that I should question anything. I tried talking to a parish priest, and now am all but shunned by him. The more I was rejected, the deeper and more numerous the questions became. (There is one Monsignor at Kenrick College (the diocese seminary) that has met with me and is still willing to do so) I haven’t said anything to my mom about this, since my father just passed in March (she doesn’t need anything else on top of that), but it weighs heavy on my heart. My wife has threatened divorce if I leave the Church, but I only attend out of obligation and don’t go to Communion. The last 5 years have been very difficult for me and my family (we lost our oldest daughter, both of my wife’s parents and my dad as well. We are teetering on the edge of divorce, and my wife is at odds with our other daughter, to the point of courtroom opponents) My faith in Jesus is much stronger through all of this, but I have given up on Catholicism. Mom is the only reason that I am still here, and now I see that I must face this as well. From what you all have said, I will not make some grand proclamation, but will quietly move on with what I see as the inevitable. Thank you for your advice, have a Merry Christmas and a blessed New Year.