Parish Dos and Don'ts from Millennials

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EnglishTeacher said:
I agree the tone here is disrespectful, especially when one considers how much the older generations have done and are still doing to keep the parish afloat by faithfully donating both their money and their time. I always wonder what the Catholic Church is going to do in 15-20 years when a good number of the older generation have either passed on or are no longer physically able to volunteer. Presently we aren’t seeing the numbers we would need from the younger generations for the most part, both in terms of financial giving and volunteering (as well as Mass attendance) to keep the current number of parishes afloat.
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Not the case around here. I am not longer involved in parish financial management, so I can’t speak to financial giving. But I see a lot more young families and young couples at mass these days than I did 20 years ago. A lot.

Again, to some extent, all that our generation accomplished was keeping parish afloat financially, not much beyond that. Lets not pat ourselves on the back so much.
 
tafan2 said:
But I see a lot more young families and young couples at mass these days than I did 20 years ago. A lot.
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That’s wonderful. Hope for the future! In your opinion, has your parish done anything in particular that attracts younger people and families?
tafan2 said:
Again, to some extent, all that our generation accomplished was keeping parish afloat financially, not much beyond that. Lets not pat ourselves on the back so much.
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I think that collectively, you can give your generation more credit than that. 🙂 But even if it is just keeping the parish doors open, that is something.
 
I haven’t seen young people excluded from service opportunities at any parish. I see lots of them functioning as altar servers, EMHCs, lectors, cantors and so forth.

I tend to think whenever anybody starts complaining about “fiefdoms” held by “previous generations”, what they really mean is that Younger Person just got there and wants to make a lot of changes/ improvements that Older Person who’s been there for 30 years doesn’t really want to make, so all of a sudden it’s an “Older Generation Fiefdom” sort of thing rather than just the younger person realizing they don’t get their own way all the time and sometimes you need to be charitable and let the other person who’s been doing it for 30 years just keep on doing.
 
EnglishTeacher said:
That’s wonderful. Hope for the future! In your opinion, has your parish done anything in particular that attracts younger people and families?
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Yes, primarily exactly what I outlined above: better confession times, better mass times, and more times of adoration and benediction of the Blessed Sacrament. Also, three of these parishes close to me have schools, and for about 10 years now, they finally started making a concerted effort to minimize tuition increases and the Diocese started a good financial aid program. Didn’t make up for 25 years of 6-8% annual increases in tuition (do that math if you want to get depressed), but it has certainly helped. Many of these young families also now have kids in school. Those are the main factors, IMO.
 
Tis_Bearself said:
If the idea is to engage the young people, then they are not going to be engaged being forced to play or sing something they don’t lik
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Correct, but they are only going to play what they know how to play too.

One of the largest arguments against Latin, Chant, Organs and other traditional forms of Church music is that it’s hard to find volunteers who know how to play/sing that kind of music and/or do it well.

Most (not all) of the Churches that have that kind of music have professionals who studied that kind of music.
 
Tis_Bearself said:
I haven’t seen young people excluded from service opportunities at any parish. I see lots of them functioning as altar servers, EMHCs, lectors, cantors and so forth.
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Agree; I don’t see anyone excluded. Parishes are always looking for volunteers to help with various ministries or roles at Mass such as the ones you list above. If people want to serve, it is not hard to find a need to fill. Perhaps the person complaining in the article was thinking of some of the older groups such as parish women’s council or Knights of Columbus? I know that the women’s councils in our parish and town are made up almost entirely of retired ladies, and when they set up for fundraisers such as church bazaars or bake sales, they do it during the day when most people are working (this is just one example). To be clear, I have no complaint about this myself; just trying to think of what the person in the article might have been referring to).
Tis_Bearself said:
I tend to think whenever anybody starts complaining about “fiefdoms” held by “previous generations”, what they really mean is that Younger Person just got there and wants to make a lot of changes/ improvements that Older Person who’s been there for 30 years doesn’t really want to make, so all of a sudden it’s an “Older Generation Fiefdom” sort of thing rather than just the younger person realizing they don’t get their own way all the time and sometimes you need to be charitable and let the other person who’s been doing it for 30 years just keep on doing.
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That’s generally true. 🙂
 
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I’m not a millennial but I’d settle for a Church that preached truth and didn’t mess with proven theology and liturgy. But we can’t all have what we want…
 
EnglishTeacher said:
I think that collectively, you can give your generation more credit than that. 🙂 But even if it is just keeping the parish doors open, that is something.
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No, I would say the two generations that spanned from say 1930 until 1970 deserve nothing more than that. Overall, we witnessed and willingly took part in all of the garbage of the 70s. 80s, and 90s. We grew up having Holy Hours and Benedictions and good catechisis, and we willingy threw every d?&*n bit of it out the window. Things started improving in the mid 90s, more like the early naughts, and many of us were involved in that. But that’s like wanting to take credit for putting the cows back in the barn after being the one who left the gate open.
 
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At the Newman Center at least, there doesn’t seem to be much emphasis on “doing it well”. Some of the kids can’t sing or play very well to be honest. They try hard though. I offer it up.
 
Tis_Bearself said:
I tend to think whenever anybody starts complaining about “fiefdoms” held by “previous generations”, what they really mean is that Younger Person just got there and wants to make a lot of changes/ improvements that Older Person who’s been there for 30 years doesn’t really want to make, so all of a sudden it’s an “Older Generation Fiefdom” sort of thing rather than just the younger person realizing they don’t get their own way all the time and sometimes you need to be charitable and let the other person who’s been doing it for 30 years just keep on doing.
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You would be surprised, but I really think the “fiefdoms” are more about the parish staffs & (to a lesser extent) the parish councils; not the average volunteers. Though there are some volunteers who are like that too when parishes have true committee chairmen.

I know a lot of Gen X and Millenial parish staffers who say it’s a constant battle trying to implement new ideas when the parish administrator or pastor is a Baby Boomer. They will say things like “we tried that 10 or 20 years ago,” but fail to realize that the demographic has changed.

I think the Matthew Kelly’s book “The Four Signs of the Dynamic Catholic” does a good job of address this.
 
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Tis_Bearself said:
At the Newman Center at least, there doesn’t seem to be much emphasis on “doing it well”. Some of the kids can’t sing or play very well to be honest. They try hard though. I offer it up.
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I guess that makes sense with a Newman Center… At Villanova though, they have really good musicians. They still do contemporary songs, but I think that’s more because of who used to be running the campus ministry. They used to stand during the concentration, etc. A new guy was hired during the middle of school year and they started kneeling right away. Haven’t been back for a while, but they always have students playing violins, organ, flutes, etc.

They also just got rid of the OCP hymnals and bought permanent ones that have a healthy mix of traditional and contemporary hymns.

It will be interesting to see how thing are next school year.
 
I’m going on experience in Orthodox Synagogues but the issues apply. Why aren’t the Millennials forming their own groups? A small parish, like a small synagogue is usually organized around seniors due to time constraints and number of members but large parishes should have multiple groups…even the same groups…broken into ages. They each do their thing and come together for larger things.

One of our Synagogues had two groups for handling sick visits, death and funeral help. The senior group handled the bulk of the work but the younger group did the visiting of children and youths in the hospital and all came together for meals after funerals. It was great training for the younger groups to eventually take over for seniors and the younger groups could schedule their meeting times more conducive to their schedules and get needed sitters, etc.

The important thing was getting together, young and old for large events. Bake sales included crafting items. Everyone enjoyed being with both their own ages AND working with the younger adults.

I just remember when I was in my 20’s feeling like I had nothing in common with 60 year olds. It was later that I figured out otherwise!
 
Perhaps the Jews are just desperate to get everyone involved as much and as early as possible to keep the faith alive. I’m not at all confident that Judaism will survive. Perhaps small pockets in a few communities will. It’s sad but it’s reality.

All the Rabbis I’ve ever known are willing to try anything to keep their people involved.
 
Again - and I think my post got buried - the millennials are the focus because their church attendance numbers are very small. It goes without saying that changing daily Mass and confession times would help out a lot of other people, too. Stay-at-home parents with young children and no daytime childcare would also love a chance to slip out to daily Mass in the evenings when their spouses come home.
 
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It’s important to take initiative, I agree. Many Catholic parishes have Theology on Tap for young adults to go out for a beer and discuss their faith. My parish has an adult basketball league.

But the issue goes beyond social needs, however. Mass and reconciliation both require a priest, so there has to be some accommodation from parishes.
 
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