Parish Shopping

[Bporte00]

I took my husband and daughter to their first Mass ever today, and it was also the first I have attended in years. Happily, my husband was very receptive to the whole experience and has said he would not mind attending Mass again (huge victory in itself!)

I chose the smallest Church in the area in hopes that we would be more welcome. While everyone was friendly the Church was very laid back in way of dress (jeans and t-shirts), and there was also very little in the way of religious symbols and art.

Please don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I think I need to attend the most decadent of churches,because that is not the case. I just have this personal feeling that church is somewhere you should dress well and not come in the first t-shirt you can find.

Also, I mention the art aspect because I am a very visual person and I have come to the realization that visual aids are very important for helping me mediate and focus.

This leads me to wonder if it is wrong of me to visit another church for these reasons, or should we commit to this Parish because it is the first we attended.

 

[Brendan_McCabe]

Traditionally you were meant to attend the parish church of the parish your residence is located. This is no longer the rule I believe, but personally my family still stick to it.

I would have ran from my current parish after my first visit but as I stay here longer I begin to appreciate things about it, and also of course I feel it was God’s providence that brought me to this location at this point in time and this is the parish He wants me to be in. Parish shopping to me would feel like I was following my own will rather than accepting Gods.

What good does leaven do if it stays only among leaven and is never added to the dough?

 

[EmeraldWings]

I would say, do what you can to find a church that best caters to the spiritual needs of you and your family,
while the external things are important, as it is a house of God, they are not absolutely necessary, after all, in times of persecution masses were said in peoples basements or other similar places…of course that would not be a good thing if it were not needed, but what i’m trying to say is, all you can do is try your best, and that is really what matters most,

and should people be dressing casually for mass? no, but that is how it is right now unfortunately, people just seem to have the attitude of “I just don’t want to offend God *to *much” instead of “i want to do what i can to please God.”
it’s a problem, and i do think it would be a good idea to find a better church, for the sake of your family.

maybe you might have one of these parishes nearby -
fssp.com/press/locations/
that is what i go to, and it’s really a beautiful and inspiring mass, everyone dresses well, the sermons are great, and the priests are very helpful and caring, so if you have one nearby, i’d check it out.

alright, hope this helps, take care.

 

[Skeptic92]

fssp.com/press/locations/
that is what i go to, and it’s really a beautiful and inspiring mass, everyone dresses well, the sermons are great, and the priests are very helpful and caring, so if you have one nearby, i’d check it out.

alright, hope this helps, take care.

If you can find a FSSP parish near you, do go! the EF Mass is beautiful! Also they’re a very traditional (but not ultra-traditional) order, with very friendly Priests in my experience, I’m actually doing my vocation discernment with the Head of the Order in the UK, got a retreat coming up within the next month or so with them.

If that don’t work, check your dioceses website, they normally have a parish lifting, see if the Dominicans, Opus Dei (Priests associated with them are generaly very, very orthodox), Benedictines (will not happen unless there is a monastery or abbey near by though), or maybe the Jesuits (the ones I’ve met are very orthodox, while i’ve heard some to the contrary), run a parish nearby.

If not, see if you can find a parish that suits your spiritual needs, lucky for me that is my domicile parish,

 

[Bporte00]

Unfortunately, there isn’t a FSSP anywhere near us I’m thinking that this is an issue which is going to require much prayer, patience, and trust. I know there are three other Churches in town and each has there own set of pro’s and con’s.

The one I’m leaning to does a very traditional mass and everyone I’ve met from there is exceptionally kind, however it has a reputation of turning out some rather raunchy teens. My daughter is only 7 months, but we are looking for a Church HOME so it’s somewhat worrisome.

 

[Bporte00]

Traditionally you were meant to attend the parish church of the parish your residence is located. This is no longer the rule I believe, but personally my family still stick to it.

How does this work when there are several Churches in the immediate area? As someone who is seeking for a more traditional way I don’t want to become a hypocrite and go against the traditional guides.

 

[buffalo]

A faithful orthodox Parish is transformative. Find one if you can.

 

[Brendan_McCabe]

How does this work when there are several Churches in the immediate area? As someone who is seeking for a more traditional way I don’t want to become a hypocrite and go against the traditional guides.

The diocese office will be able to advise you if it is not clear.

 

[RosaryFan]

I took my husband and daughter to their first Mass ever today, and it was also the first I have attended in years. Happily, my husband was very receptive to the whole experience and has said he would not mind attending Mass again (huge victory in itself!)

I chose the smallest Church in the area in hopes that we would be more welcome. While everyone was friendly the Church was very laid back in way of dress (jeans and t-shirts), and there was also very little in the way of religious symbols and art.

Please don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I think I need to attend the most decadent of churches,because that is not the case. I just have this personal feeling that church is somewhere you should dress well and not come in the first t-shirt you can find.

Also, I mention the art aspect because I am a very visual person and I have come to the realization that visual aids are very important for helping me mediate and focus.

This leads me to wonder if it is wrong of me to visit another church for these reasons, or should we commit to this Parish because it is the first we attended.

I agree with you whole-heartedly about the way of dress and with respect to the artwork! I am a traditional type of person and I LOVE the old churches with the statues, paintings, etc. Unfortunately, the statues don’t make the parishioners dress any nicer.

However, personally, I would choose the parish in whose boundaries I live, especially if you have children. It makes for an easier sense of community when the people at Mass are actually your neighbors.

But whatever church you choose, you and your family showing up every Sunday in respectable clothes will set a wonderful example for those who need it!! If you join a parish that is in need of refurbishing in that regard, then get involved and make yourself known by your fellow parishioners. It won’t be long before some people (not all) follow suit (literally) and start dressing nicer.