Paying for Wedding masses?

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I’ve just learned that a nearby parish charges $900.00 to have a wedding Mass. In addition there is another $200 charged for musicians and a wedding Mass coordinator.

Is this comparable to your parish? This seems very odd to me. I remember the days when paying for weddings, baptisms, etc… was purely on a volunteer basis. Money was not a requirement for getting married in the Church. Am I behind the times?

Sincerely in Christ,
Corrgc
 
corrgc said:
I’ve just learned that a nearby parish charges $900.00 to have a wedding Mass. In addition there is another $200 charged for musicians and a wedding Mass coordinator.

Is this comparable to your parish? This seems very odd to me. I remember the days when paying for weddings, baptisms, etc… was purely on a volunteer basis. Money was not a requirement for getting married in the Church. Am I behind the times?

Sincerely in Christ,
Corrgc
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You are not paying for the Mass but for the use of the building at a time when it’s not usually in use: utilities, cleaning, etc.

The salaried musician’s pay usually takes into account how many weddings and funerals a parish averages in a year. Based on those numbers, say 50 at $200 per, his salary is then paid as “pay scale minus $10,000 that will be earned by playing for weddings and funerals”. That’s why, whether you use the church’s musician or someone else, you pay the fee.

I remember paying a fee when I got married 33 years ago. It was about the same as what my present parish charges: $150.
 
At our parish, the charge was $500, which included:
pianist
singer (whatever that person is called)
flowers for the church (the deal was though, that the flowers stayed at the church - it was so nice to see MY wedding flowers there the next Sunday!)
light refreshments for the bridal party (how nice!)
and I’m assuming various custodial fees and the such

I would imagine the wages of all of those people are also very dependent on where you live. I’m in the midwest.

If it is a financial hardship, I suggest you talk to the priest. You will NOT be denied access to a sacrament for financial reasons, that’s for sure. Our wedding coordinator had told us about a couple who had gotten married the Sunday before with no flowers, no pianist, or any of the other trappings, just the two of them and their closest family. Priceless…no really, there was no price for it, it was free 🙂

The only thing is…if you tell the church you can’t pay for the wedding and show up in a $5000 wedding gown, well, I think they would be a little :mad:

Edited to add: There is a church near me…I wouldn’t call it a parish, they don’t have regular mass, it’s a catholic church but they only do weddings. It’s GORGEOUS, seriously, it used to be a monastery. Anyway, the charge to get married THERE is somewhere in the thousands I think. My friends recently married there, it would have cost $200 if they married in their small parish which they attend, but they wanted the big old Catholic church feel, and unfortunately so does everyone else, so for that type of setting, you would pay.
 
I’m sure it’s a varying thing from parish to parish. When I got married - 7 1/2 years ago - there was no charge for the church. We gave something (honestly don’t remember what now though) to the church. And no musician charge either; of course, 3 of my friends were my musicians - they wouldn’t have dreamt of being paid. We did give them gifts, however.

Of course, I have no idea what it’s like today; especially since I’m no longer a member there. And I honestly don’t know what charges are, if any, where we attend now.
 
corrgc said:
I’ve just learned that a nearby parish charges $900.00 to have a wedding Mass. In addition there is another $200 charged for musicians and a wedding Mass coordinator.

Is this comparable to your parish? This seems very odd to me. I remember the days when paying for weddings, baptisms, etc… was purely on a volunteer basis. Money was not a requirement for getting married in the Church. Am I behind the times?

Sincerely in Christ,
Corrgc
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If you marry at a regularly scheduled Mass, there is generally no charge.

The charge is for a private wedding Mass, i.e. opening the Church at a time the Church would normally not be used. Someone has to open, someone has to clean up, someone has to close, the light/heat/ac must be on, and the organist must show up. It all costs money.

God Bless
 
corrgc said:
I’ve just learned that a nearby parish charges $900.00 to have a wedding Mass. In addition there is another $200 charged for musicians and a wedding Mass coordinator.

Is this comparable to your parish? This seems very odd to me. I remember the days when paying for weddings, baptisms, etc… was purely on a volunteer basis. Money was not a requirement for getting married in the Church. Am I behind the times?

Sincerely in Christ,
Corrgc
Click to expand...
If this “nearby parish” is not YOUR parish, the one at which the bride, groom, or one set of parents is registered, but is instead a popular place for weddings because of its location or special beauty, the cost may reflect that as well.
 
corrgc said:
I’ve just learned that a nearby parish charges $900.00 to have a wedding Mass. In addition there is another $200 charged for musicians and a wedding Mass coordinator.

Is this comparable to your parish? This seems very odd to me. I remember the days when paying for weddings, baptisms, etc… was purely on a volunteer basis. Money was not a requirement for getting married in the Church. Am I behind the times?

Sincerely in Christ,
Corrgc
Click to expand...
That is weird. I didn’t pay a dime. I married in the Church, and donated food for the food pantry.

The sacraments are free (or at least they are supposed to be). “Use of the facility” is a lame excuse. The church is a facility specifically purchased for the Church to use for liturgical celebrations, most especially celebration of the sacraments.
 
The workman is worth his wage.

Also the sacrament only requires the witness from the Church, two other witnesses, and of course the Bride and Groom. The mass and everything else is additional.
 
I usually attend Mass on Saturdays at 5:30p.m. Recently a couple got married right before the Mass got started. It was just the Bride and Groom and a few relatives and friends attending their wedding.
Then of course all of us attending Mass witnessed the wedding.
It was sweet and easy and no hassles.
The old priest was happy that it was a simple wedding.
I liked being a witness too. I had met the groom outside before his wedding and I said to him that Jesus was going to make all the wine they needed for the wedding. He said, “All I can drink?”
and I said, “Yes”, all you can drink".
They chose the perfect day to get married. The Gospel was about The Wedding at Cana. It was also a special celebration day of our Blessed Virgin Mary. It was just perfect.
We also happen to have a Band and singers on Saturdays.
 
corrgc said:
I’ve just learned that a nearby parish charges $900.00 to have a wedding Mass. coordinator.

Isgc
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NO they do not charge for the Mass, they charge for use of the church. watch your phraseology. if parish staff have worded it this way, they are in error and the pastor should be notified. at least a dozen acrimonious threads on this topic already if you care to wade thru them, but short answer is yes, it is common for parishes to recoup at least some of the overhead involved in use of the church facilities by individuals outside scheduled parish liturgies.
 
itsjustdave1988 said:
That is weird. I didn’t pay a dime. I married in the Church, and donated food for the food pantry.

The sacraments are free (or at least they are supposed to be). “Use of the facility” is a lame excuse. The church is a facility specifically purchased for the Church to use for liturgical celebrations, most especially celebration of the sacraments.
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yes it was not purchased with green stamps, parishioners pay with every collection for the expenses associated with the building and maintenance, why should any other liturgy be different? is there a particular reason for choice of forum? I was married in a traditional church a long enough time ago to be classed as traditional and yes we paid for use of the church building, even though my parents were long time parishioners and had contributed beyond their income to build the church and school. this is not a new innovation
 
In truth, if we as faithful Christians took our support for the church seriously, this is an issue that would never arise … but alas, we support our parishes poorly …

I regularly attend a small rural church in a depressed [long before this current economic crisis] area … now many of the parishioners survive on limited funds, of this I have no doubt - the observation tells the story… but equally observable in the parking lot is the number of new cars and pick-ups … and other evidences of funds spent [jewery, clothes, etc] on many of the parishioners … in the parish along with the disabled and retired are at least two doctors and one vet, school teachers … an a couple of governement employees …

In late August this priest was unable to meet the payroll [the parish has one priest and one secretary - not an elaborate staff] and was also unable to provide gas reimbursement for the 2 Augustinian priests - who traveled some 1000 miles on thier vacation to allow Fr. to take his first vacation in two years … this parish is only open because the Augustinians provide a priest.

If this parish closes the people will have to drive 25 miles one way - 50 miles round trip to church each Sunday for Mass …

And the faithful wonder why the church needs to charge a fee for weddings [not for the sacrament - you can get married in any regularly scheduled mass - for nothing - but for the use of the church] … this fee covers opening the church - not just for the wedding but for the rehersal too, the utility costs heating, air conditioning, electricty water and sewer, etc, plus toilet paper, paper towels, cleaning up after the wedding, isurance costs …

This financial support has to come from someone … We have to pay wages to parish staff, meet the payroll taxes and pay the utilities and maintenance, purchase supplies vestments, hosts, sacraemental wine, fowers, decorations, religious education materials, even marriage preparation materials …

Too many people think that God provides … well He does provide… he provides us!!!

Be a joyful and generous giver …
 
I’ve been told by friends who were recently married that it is usual practice here in Australia for fees to be lower or even waived for parishioners who regularly attend mass at that church as they make a regular contribution to the church, but those who only go to church for Christmas and Easter (or don’t even make that much of a commitment) will be expected to contribute more.
 
YADA said:
In truth, if we as faithful Christians took our support for the church seriously, this is an issue that would never arise … but alas, we support our parishes poorly …
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When our parish started, they used to meet in the basement of a japanese restaurant, nicknamed St. Yakitori’s. They build the sanctuary through responsible tithing and other charitable donations from parishoners and sister parishes in the diocese, and we’ve had a strong tithing focus ever since. Guess you gotta prioritize what’s important to you.

Perhaps this is why I’m confused by being charged for “facility use” for celebrating the Mass at a wedding.

The tithing contribution in my parish is collectively about $20K a week. This is for the O&M of the facility, mostly, but also for a tithe from our parish to other charitable organizations which come to us in need. Consequently, we don’t need to charge for facility use, as it is always open, every day, 6:30am to 9pm, for private prayer and all kinds of liturgical celebrations, bible studies, religious ed., etc, and yes…marriages either with or without a Mass.

Our sanctuary is always in use. I’m blessed to have parish which takes their tithing support seriously.
 
itsjustdave1988 said:
The tithing contribution in my parish is collectively about $20K a week.
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We’re lucky if we get $1000. Last year we ran a $12,000 deficit. Luckily we had a nest egg from about 15 years ago that we’ve been making smaller and smaller as the years go by.
 
It all depends on the area and the church.

When my husband and I were married 5 years ago, we chose to have it at the Cathedral in the city which was where we were active volunteer musicians for a few years since college. It was where we went to mass every Sunday and it has now become our parish. The Cathedral at that time had a donation of $800 for the use of the building, lighting, cooling/heating, paying the janitors for cleanup/unlock/lockup etc. We did not have to pay that fee, though, because we were active chorus members for about 5 years before we were married. The same would be granted for other parishioners if they couldn’t afford it or active members. We also didn’t have to pay for the music, as we knew everyone in the choir and wanted to sing for our wedding and we were friends with the organist.

It was only $150 more than my childhood parish in the “country” borderline suburbs with overflowing numbers of parishioners. that parish is pretty well-off, whereas the Cathedral parish isn’t since the neighborhoods surrounding it was basically torn down by office buildings and express ways. (There are only 600 households - it’s one of the reasons my husband and I decided to become parishioners a little less than a year ago.)

The pastor, two pastors before our current one never asked for a dime from the diocese for the upkeep of the cathedral. He prided himself on it and I’m sure it did save the diocese a lot of money from that. The one after him didn’t either. There were lots of problems with the building from serious leaks and water damage, flooding in the basement, and other damages, but things were never really properly taken care of. When our current pastor came, building problems came to a head. He had to put in major money to repair the entire roof, the ceilings, etc. Remember this is a Cathedral - a huge one. This past year, I looked on the website to see how much a donation would be and it is now $2000 for non-parshioners and $1500 for parishioners. But then I went on line and looked up the fees for other cathedrals and depending on the area, the fees were fairly comparable. It’s $2000 at St. Patrick’s. We’re in a major city, so it’s expected.
 
I am a Music Minister…

when i came on board, the charge for accompanist/cantor was $300… I felt that was steep. I charge $125 to accompany and cantor weddings, or if i hire it out, $100 each for the accompanist and cantor (not too many of us can play AND sing any more!)

the church fee was and still is, $150

incidently, I charge nothing for funerals as I view them as a corporal work of mercy
 
corrgc said:
I’ve just learned that a nearby parish charges $900.00 to have a wedding Mass. In addition there is another $200 charged for musicians and a wedding Mass coordinator.

Is this comparable to your parish? This seems very odd to me. I remember the days when paying for weddings, baptisms, etc… was purely on a volunteer basis. Money was not a requirement for getting married in the Church. Am I behind the times?

Sincerely in Christ,
Corrgc
Click to expand...
A Catholic and member of the parish is never charged fo the reception of a Sacrament, that is absolutely against the law of the Church. A Wedding coordinator is not required if you plan your own wedding using the Marriage Rite of the Church. Which anyone can obtain a copy of. A parish may have a fee for any additional things like clean up, extra utilities (heat, air, lights) for a rehersal, music, hall use, etc.
 
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