Permissable sex

[CuriousInIL]

One act is defined by them as basically is one male ejaculation, when the wife organism (before or after the husband) is irrelevant.

Well, this wife would take objection to being an irrelevant organism

Bah thats not what I meant!

I meant was, if for some reason it doesn’t get the job done before or during he better finish what he started before he falls asleep!

I think the chief funny—at least to me—was the mistaken use of the word organism rather than what you probably meant.

 

[LJN21]

I think the chief funny—at least to me—was the mistaken use of the word organism rather than what you probably meant.

Yeah see spell check = fail. Just now noticed it too.

 

[kage_ar]

I think the chief funny—at least to me—was the mistaken use of the word organism rather than what you probably meant.

Glad I’m not the only one who found that funny.

 

[ChristinaM]

Right now I have one nursing so I can relate to a degree

Have you ever taken the classes? You could start charting and maybe in a few months have a few 100% safe days.

NFP classes aren’t at all expensive either. $35 got me charts, stickers, and many sessions of personal instruction in the Billings Method from a wonderful Catholic lady. If you haven’t taken a class, go for it.

 

[Marc64]

Why has no one responded to the concerns of marc64 June 14th?

 

[LJN21]

OK What about the folks along in age where they can no longer procreate and as in my case cannot have normal erections nor do I any longer have ejaculate because of the removal of my prostate. And yes, for the unknowledged, folks like myself can still have some form of climax. Where do my wife and I stand on Catholic Church intimacy? What is right in the eyes of God and His church? Is mutual pleasure wrong to the point of reaching climax? This has nothing to do with self gratification but rather marital unitive love and expressing one’s fondness of the other. Do we enjoy this? Not totally, but we do not see other avenues except avoidance ( can’t say celebate because of the circumstances). We did our time and we did it correctly for the most part for the last 41 years. Now what? Any logical guidance or do we wing it behind closed doors? Thank you,
marc64

Why has no one responded to the concerns of marc64 June 14th?

I don’t really know, I’d think so long as you went in to the act with intension of doing correctly and if things don’t work out right, thats no fault of either of yours.

Have you been able to talk to a trusted Priest about it?

 

[Bill_Cherry]

:tsktsk: 1 Corinthians 7:3:bowdown: & 5:thumbsup:

 

[ChristinaM]

Why has no one responded to the concerns of marc64 June 14th?

Have you tried the Ask an Apologist Forum? You might give Catholic Answers a call too. I think your situation is beyond most posters’ scope of knowledge.

 

[Mirror_Mirror]

Why has no one responded to the concerns of marc64 June 14th?

Probably because you are asking a question in a thread that is focusing on a different topic. It is encouraged by the moderators here, if you have a question to start a thread on it, not to “hijack” another thread with your question.

Try starting a thread, I know you will get more responses.

 

[Stylteralmaldo]

:tsktsk: 1 Corinthians 7:3:bowdown: & 5:thumbsup:

**3 The husband should fulfill his duty toward his wife, and likewise the wife toward her husband. **
**4 ****A wife does not have authority over her own body, but rather her husband, and similarly a husband does not have authority over his own body, but rather his wife. **
**5 ****Do not deprive each other, except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, to be free for prayer, but then return to one another, so that Satan may not tempt you through your lack of self-control. **

This seems to be a tricky point. I understand that both partners may abstain by mutual consent. Scripture is quite clear on this. But how does one define “for a time” and how long “for a time” ought to be before getting to the point of being tempted by satan through lack of self-control? It probably varies from couple to couple. Also, you have the varying sex drives of both individuals to take into consideration.

I did read recently in Love and Responsibility by JPII that there is the problem of being hyper-sensual (wanting sex too much) and hypo-sensual (not wanting sex enough) when it comes to the marital embrace. The challenge is balancing the two so that a healthy sexual life can remain intact.

 

[newbetx]

Hey, Princess!

I know not everyone agrees. Newbetx fusses at me fairly regularly for finding too many shades of grey (but I don’t mind). The big thing that the priest stressed to us is that God gave us a brain and we should use it to sort through the grey areas … I tend to stay away from the details and embrace the big picture.

Moi? fussing?:nope: Can’t be so!

Interesting topic. While I can undertand your point, I’ve got to stick to the intent of the act, again. As I understand it, Tab P is to complete in Slot V every time unless some “accident” occurs. (No, I’m not saying every loving act must end in intercourse. We have other posts and threads that cover those discussions. No need to start another one here.)

As much as I would like to say otherwise, a BJ puposly taken to completion appears to me as an act of contraception. I mean really. What is the difference between using a barrier method at 7PM and not using one at 10PM? How does the later justify the former? If one wants to ask how a BJ is a barrier method, then I suggest you just look at the mirror and see how much barrier is between the tip of Tab P and the entrance of slot V in this case.

And I’m sorry, I can’t put too much faith in the instruction your priest gave you. Based on other posts on CAF, other priests have given bad advice on sexual issues. Sometimes, I think, we focus too much on the act and not enough on the love the act is to reflect. Maybe that was what he was trying to say.

We know as humans we can self-decieve ourselves (either to allow things that we should not or to limit ourselves from acheiving what is possible with God). If one believes God will allow something for a couple, then maybe either they didn’t ask or God said “Yes.” I suggest our brains get us into trouble more than they get us out of it. But it is what is in our hearts that will be judged.

 

[newbetx]

Speaking of, Newbetx, why aren’t you piping up in this conversation? Nobody says “hey Princess, you’re wrong” quite as lovely, tactfully, and sweetly as you do (although Mirror Mirror is giving you a run for your money)

Come out and play when you can.

Thanks for the complement!

I wasn’t posting because I took my daughter (and DW) camping. Something DD always wanted to do but DW is not a keen camper. I’m usually with the boys at scouts so she doesn’t get to come along. We had a great time.

I hope you find my response thoughful and tackful! I try not to think of people as “wrong” as much as “uninformed.”

 

[newbetx]

Why has no one responded to the concerns of marc64 June 14th?

I thought I did…
forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=3765588&postcount=45

Sorry if I missed anything new in the later post. Really, from what I understand, all one can do is try. To not try is more “sinful” than trying, IMO. Like I said before, sometimes we just need to understand the bigger picture and the details become clear. Did you get TGNAS&M yet?

 

[Princess18]

If one wants to ask how a BJ is a barrier method, then I suggest you just look at the mirror and see how much barrier is between the tip of Tab P and the entrance of slot V in this case.

Tab P and Slot V … I think I just peed my pants laughing.

:clapping:

(But your answer is insightful as always)

 

[newbetx]

Tab P and Slot V … I think I just peed my pants laughing.

:clapping:

(But your answer is insightful as always)

Glad you liked the analogy… or was that Oralogy? Trying to make a PG rated post rather than R or PG13… besides, just giddy after recovering from CAF withdrawl (pun intended).

 

[Dredgemate]

Hey, Princess!

Moi? fussing?:nope: Can’t be so!

Interesting topic. While I can undertand your point, I’ve got to stick to the intent of the act, again. As I understand it, Tab P is to complete in Slot V every time unless some “accident” occurs. (No, I’m not saying every loving act must end in intercourse. We have other posts and threads that cover those discussions. No need to start another one here.)

As much as I would like to say otherwise, a BJ puposly taken to completion appears to me as an act of contraception. I mean really. What is the difference between using a barrier method at 7PM and not using one at 10PM? How does the later justify the former? If one wants to ask how a BJ is a barrier method, then I suggest you just look at the mirror and see how much barrier is between the tip of Tab P and the entrance of slot V in this case.

And I’m sorry, I can’t put too much faith in the instruction your priest gave you. Based on other posts on CAF, other priests have given bad advice on sexual issues. Sometimes, I think, we focus too much on the act and not enough on the love the act is to reflect. Maybe that was what he was trying to say.

We know as humans we can self-decieve ourselves (either to allow things that we should not or to limit ourselves from acheiving what is possible with God). If one believes God will allow something for a couple, then maybe either they didn’t ask or God said “Yes.” I suggest our brains get us into trouble more than they get us out of it. But it is what is in our hearts that will be judged.

Sorry to resurect a dead thread, but this brings up a good point, how do you bracket the time frame of the marital act? I tend to agree w/ princess that common sense should dictate when looking at the marital act.

My wife and I are regularly multi orgasmic when we make love. Generally speaking, I usually ejaculate inside her both times, but sometimes I only do it once. I’m not using contraception, and we are practicers of NFP, so we abstain during her fertile periods. Where does the church teach that each marital act is limited to one orgasm per person?

 

[Mirror_Mirror]

Sorry to resurect a dead thread, but this brings up a good point, how do you bracket the time frame of the marital act? I tend to agree w/ princess that common sense should dictate when looking at the marital act.

My wife and I are regularly multi orgasmic when we make love. Generally speaking, I usually ejaculate inside her both times, but sometimes I only do it once. I’m not using contraception, and we are practicers of NFP, so we abstain during her fertile periods. Where does the church teach that each marital act is limited to one orgasm per person?

I do not think that you are going to find a specific teaching that states that a marital act is limited to just one orgasm. However, you will find that each act must be open to human life. The way to create human life is by the sperm being ejaculated inside the vagina.

From the Catechism:

2366 Fecundity is a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful. A child does not come from outside as something added on to the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfillment. So the Church, which is “on the side of life,” teaches that **“it is necessary that each and every marriage act remain ordered per se to the procreation of human life.” **"This particular doctrine, expounded on numerous occasions by the Magisterium, is based on the inseparable connection, established by God, which man on his own initiative may not break, between the unitive significance and the procreative significance which are both inherent to the marriage act."

Bold mine

Each act must be open to life and the sperm must be present for life to be created. True you may have had an orgasm 10 minutes earlier, however, what you must remember here is that the orgasm must happen inside you wife, no matter if it is 5 minutes after the first orgasm or 5 hours.

Procreation cannot happen without the sperm (and yes the egg ladies), and each act must be open to new life. Henceforth, each orgasm should take place inside of the vagina.