Persistent Protestant Pastor

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mouse_has_faith

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Hi guys,

this Protestant pastor I know has this REALLY infuriating habit of just arriving, completely unannounced, at our place and stays for hours. He just did it again today. A particularly bad example; when I returned home from living/ working in Italy for a few months, my grandparents whom I don’t see that often came over to visit, and he showed up when they were over, without warning (as per usual). Kinda spoilt the whole “family” thing.

I’ve asked him several times already to call before he comes over, but he never has. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to tell him to stop coming over in a nice but firm way? I really don’t want anything to do with him or his church.

Cheers,
Amanda.
 
mouse_has_faith said:
Hi guys,

this Protestant pastor I know has this REALLY infuriating habit of just arriving, completely unannounced, at our place and stays for hours. He just did it again today. A particularly bad example; when I returned home from living/ working in Italy for a few months, my grandparents whom I don’t see that often came over to visit, and he showed up when they were over, without warning (as per usual). Kinda spoilt the whole “family” thing.

I’ve asked him several times already to call before he comes over, but he never has. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to tell him to stop coming over in a nice but firm way? I really don’t want anything to do with him or his church.

Cheers,
Amanda.
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How about, “I’m sorry, but I have family visiting right now, and we are having a private visit. Perhaps you could call ahead next time. Goodbye!” And then close the door without letting him in.
 
mouse_has_faith said:
Hi guys,

this Protestant pastor I know has this REALLY infuriating habit of just arriving, completely unannounced, at our place and stays for hours. He just did it again today. A particularly bad example; when I returned home from living/ working in Italy for a few months, my grandparents whom I don’t see that often came over to visit, and he showed up when they were over, without warning (as per usual). Kinda spoilt the whole “family” thing.

I’ve asked him several times already to call before he comes over, but he never has. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to tell him to stop coming over in a nice but firm way? I really don’t want anything to do with him or his church.

Cheers,
Amanda.
Click to expand...
Treat him like any other person. Just because he’s a pastor, he doesn’t have any special privillege or standing when it comes to common courtesy. If he was an insurance salesman, how would you handle the situation? Take the same tact.
 
He keeps coming because you keep letting him in.

Next time, tell him “I have asked you to call ahead, and you didn’t. I am busy right now so you’ll have to leave.” And close the door!

Or, better yet, be direct with him and tell him that you are not interested in joining his church and you want him to stop coming to your house. And then don’t let him in if he comes around.

Honestly, people are pushy and you have to stand up for yourself.
 
jmcrae said:
How about, “I’m sorry, but I have family visiting right now, and we are having a private visit. Perhaps you could call ahead next time. Goodbye!” And then close the door without letting him in.
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Exactly.
 
I’m trying to understand the situation here… is he a friend who just happens to be a Protestant Minister? or is he coming over trying to “save” you?

If he isn’t a friend first I would just tell him you aren’t interested. You have enjoyed some of the discussions but you belong to the Church founded by Jesus Christ and you have the fullness of Truth. You are happy that he loves Christ and is trying to do his work but that he needs to focus on someone else.

If he dosen’t get the point I would revert back to the “I told you to call first please, I’m sorry but we don’t have time now” and close the door.

Joe
 
jwashu said:
I’m trying to understand the situation here… is he a friend who just happens to be a Protestant Minister? or is he coming over trying to “save” you?

If he isn’t a friend first I would just tell him you aren’t interested. You have enjoyed some of the discussions but you belong to the Church founded by Jesus Christ and you have the fullness of Truth. You are happy that he loves Christ and is trying to do his work but that he needs to focus on someone else.

If he dosen’t get the point I would revert back to the “I told you to call first please, I’m sorry but we don’t have time now” and close the door.

Joe
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‘Friend’ or not, the man should not be popping in and staying for hours without calling first. It’s the height of rudeness.
 
Tell him he is just in time to join you and your family in praying the rosary, in Latin.
 
Of course just telling him to go away crossed my mind, I’ve just refrained because it’s so rude… I was hoping for a nice way to do it. Perhaps there’s no polite way to tell someone to take a hike?
I’m trying to understand the situation here… is he a friend who just happens to be a Protestant Minister? or is he coming over trying to “save” you?
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So am I. My sister & I had this long discussion last night about what his possible motives are. At least if he invited me to his church or a Bible study or something I’d understand his reasons, but he never does. He doesn’t appear interested in anything in my life, so really, I’m at a loss as to what he wants.
 
mouse_has_faith said:
Of course just telling him to go away crossed my mind, I’ve just refrained because it’s so rude… I was hoping for a nice way to do it. Perhaps there’s no polite way to tell someone to take a hike?
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He’s the one who is being extremely rude by coming over uninvited and overstaying his welcome. It’s your absolute right as a resident to refuse entry to whoever you want to refuse entry to - unless it’s the police or something. Refusing to let him into your house under the circumstances is not rude in the slightest, it’s simply asserting your rights.

You don’t need to say ‘rack off’ or anything, it can be as simple as ‘I don’t accept unsolicited mail or phone calls, and I no longer receive uninvited visitors into my home either. By the way, I’ve never once actually invited you to visit.’ That’s blunt, sure, but he sounds like the type who needs to be spoken to bluntly.
So am I. My sister & I had this long discussion last night about what his possible motives are. At least if he invited me to his church or a Bible study or something I’d understand his reasons, but he never does. He doesn’t appear interested in anything in my life, so really, I’m at a loss as to what he wants.
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Who knows - maybe he has the hots for you but is too shy to ask you out? Maybe it’s someone else there he’s interested in and not you? Maybe he likes your coffee and cakes?
 
mouse_has_faith said:
So am I. My sister & I had this long discussion last night about what his possible motives are. At least if he invited me to his church or a Bible study or something I’d understand his reasons, but he never does. He doesn’t appear interested in anything in my life, so really, I’m at a loss as to what he wants.
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Well, ask him. Why do you keep coming around? You don’t know us that well? You aren’t trying to convert us? What do you want? What is your reason for being here?
 
mouse_has_faith said:
My sister & I had this long discussion last night about what his possible motives are. At least if he invited me to his church or a Bible study or something I’d understand his reasons, but he never does. He doesn’t appear interested in anything in my life, so really, I’m at a loss as to what he wants.
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How does someone come into your home, uninvited, whom you don’t even seem to know very well? :confused:

I am a very private person, and I really don’t like people coming into my house and looking at all my stuff, so if someone shows up unexpectedly at the door, I talk to them outside on the front step; I don’t let them into the house.
 
What kind of Protestant minister is he? that make a big difference.

Joe
 
jmcrae said:
How does someone come into your home, uninvited, whom you don’t even seem to know very well? :confused:

I am a very private person, and I really don’t like people coming into my house and looking at all my stuff, so if someone shows up unexpectedly at the door, I talk to them outside on the front step; I don’t let them into the house.
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We are the same way. Unless you are family/friend or we have already made arrangements for you to come over, you will not be coming into this house. We step outside, close the door, and we talk on the porch.

I agree this man is being very rude. One time I can excuse, but to repeatedly do this after you have already made it clear you would like a call before hand is the height of rudeness.
 
Oh, I’ve attended his church in the past (before I really understood the difference between Catholic/Protestantism), and his Bible study too, so I’ve known him for a number of years now. I should’ve made that clear from the start. He’s far from a stranger, though I definently wasn’t on close terms with him, and he doesn’t have the hots for me (he’s a decent man, perhaps discluding manners!!). I would N E V E R in a million years let some random guy into the house!!! 😛
What kind of Protestant minister is he? that make a big difference.
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Do you mean, what’s his denomination? or…?
 
Don’t answer the door when he shows up uninvited! If he asks you why later on, say you were busy and couldn’t come to the door. Then say, “I’m sorry if I upset you, but I have a lot going on and I don’t always have time for company. If you call me before you come over, you can save yourself a trip.”
 
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