Place in household

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EasterJoy said:
Yet I don’t think the couples who don’t believe anyone is in authority are much worse off than the ones who think they do, but who have a warped idea concerning what that means. As nearly as I can tell from the statistics, the marriages of the latter aren’t healthier or happier, and they may be worse. When Scriptures told the men to be as Christ, he did not have in mind that they act like tyrants.
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I do agree with that. I did state before that I believe one must be the decision maker. I think this because if you take two controlling people, marry them, and then when it comes time for decisions, they will but-heads together. It simply cannot work. One must be able to agree rather than decide.
 
In a marriage two people are involved husband and wife. There is no reason for a leader when two people are involved. If we where talking about a larger group of say 5 or more people the need for a leader becomes apparent. When two reasonable people are married they should be able to come to an agreement. If they struggle with this than I would suggest marriage counseling. The need to make the husband the leader is pretty silly.
 
LucyLight said:
In a marriage two people are involved husband and wife. There is no reason for a leader when two people are involved. If we where talking about a larger group of say 5 or more people the need for a leader becomes apparent. When two reasonable people are married they should be able to come to an agreement. If they struggle with this than I would suggest marriage counseling. The need to make the husband the leader is pretty silly.
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Do you agree with what god says though? If you do, then you would have to admit that the man is the authority of the household. or say scripture says.
😉
 
I have no problem with the husband being the head of the household in theory but there should not be any practical application of this in a marriage. Like I said two people should be able to come to an agreement. I have a healthy, happy marriage and when it comes to the big decisions we work through it till we come to the best solution. This isn’t some feminist idealogy its being practical. We are both reasonable competent adults who value the others opinion. There should be no need for one to be head over the other. If there is a need for the husband to do so that would make me think their marriage was in crisis or maybe counselling is needed.
 
Those are cute. I’m almost positive that i’ve seen something like that before. 🙂
 
LucyLight said:
I have no problem with the husband being the head of the household in theory but there should not be any practical application of this in a marriage. Like I said two people should be able to come to an agreement. I have a healthy, happy marriage and when it comes to the big decisions we work through it till we come to the best solution. This isn’t some feminist idealogy its being practical. We are both reasonable competent adults who value the others opinion. There should be no need for one to be head over the other. If there is a need for the husband to do so that would make me think their marriage was in crisis or maybe counselling is needed.
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I have no problem with the husband being the head of the household in theory but there should not be any practical application of this in a marriage. Do you mean like what Queen Elizabeth II has? (The prime minister does meet with her and discusses true matters of state, and asks for her opinion on a regular basis. She does have true (name removed by moderator)ut.) Or less than that, even? It is ideal that a husband lead by getting full consent every time, but I’m not sure that is always going to happen with every couple.

The Senate can go a long time without the Vice President ever casting a vote. There’s nothing wrong with that! Still, if the day comes when he is called upon to cast it–that is, if wonder of wonders, there is something that a couple simply cannot agree on–it is hardly time to call in the crisis counsellors. Somebody gives in, you see how it goes, and you debrief afterwards. If you mean that it can be decided that the husband is sometimes the one that gives in, well, that happens, of course. Being the head of the household does not mean deciding in to honor your own preferences every time! The question is, if nobody is giving in, who decides whose preferences are going to win out?

But yes, the ideal is that decisions are made so as to be as “win-win” as possible. If the husband is a bit less enamoured with the idea that he is the ultimate authority than his wife is, if he is more concerned that he miss no opportunity to give himself up for her welfare, so much the better.
 
kamaan said:
I don’t really have anything to actually contribute to this thread… my point of view is being represented pretty well.

I just was reminded of this “Romance Guide” and thought I’d share some of the tips it had… they are pretty funny:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/sb66-15.jpg
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Tell your husband what you’re learning from his leadership “when he’s not busy”? Oh, yes, act that way! In so doing, you can also ruin his appetite, and you’ll have more home-cooking for tomorrow’s leftovers. Two birds with one stone! :rolleyes:

Has anyone who is secure in his or her authority ever enjoyed obsequious nonsense like this? (There are no nauseated emoticons, I see. Oh, well. 🤷)

http://www.cracked.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/sb66-18.jpg

AKA: Grab a slip from the “Honey-Do” Jar!
 
EasterJoy said:
Tell your husband what you’re learning from his leadership “when he’s not busy”? Oh, yes, act that way! In so doing, you can also ruin his appetite, and you’ll have more home-cooking for tomorrow’s leftovers. Two birds with one stone! :rolleyes:

Has anyone who is secure in his or her authority ever enjoyed obsequious nonsense like this? (There are no nauseated emoticons, I see. Oh, well. 🤷)

http://www.cracked.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/sb66-18.jpg

AKA: Grab a slip from the “Honey-Do” Jar!
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Lol, that is what it sounds like, isnt it? 😛
 
I don’t agree with Protestant stuff unless it happens to be Catholic… iow, some of what Protestants teach is correct and also is what the Church teaches.

He’s saying that women should not seek to be ordained, or to preach from the pulpit, etc. Lots of variety in the Protestant communities! And I think they should all be Catholic, which means that none would be ordained…

As to submission, authority, etc., in the home, Yes, it is true that many families are not so constituted as a result of feminism. And that violates God’s plan for families.

However, I would propose that the man has the harder job. Everyone acts like the man being the head of the household is a great deal for him, and a lousy deal for the wife, but I don’t believe that. I believe that a husband who is a proper head of the household loves his wife to the point where he would give up his life for her.

The reason that men are the heads is that after Adam and Eve sinned, God said that Adam would have to be the head, and Eve would have to submit. The way I see it, each was punished, and what I have seen of many, many relationships is that women like ot be in charge and men are perfectly willing to allow it. Women see the power, and man see the relinquishment as a letting go of responsibility.

What I believe is actually supposed to happen is that each is supposed to learn something to overcome a normal, but bad, tendency in the self. Men naturally gravitate towards wanting to sit in front of the tv and not bothering about a bunch of stuff. Women naturally gravitate towards bustling about micro-managing everything. God wants each of them to get over their particular vice or bad natural tendency.
 
St_Francis said:
I don’t agree with Protestant stuff unless it happens to be Catholic… iow, some of what Protestants teach is correct and also is what the Church teaches.

He’s saying that women should not seek to be ordained, or to preach from the pulpit, etc. Lots of variety in the Protestant communities! And I think they should all be Catholic, which means that none would be ordained…

As to submission, authority, etc., in the home, Yes, it is true that many families are not so constituted as a result of feminism. And that violates God’s plan for families.

However, I would propose that the man has the harder job. Everyone acts like the man being the head of the household is a great deal for him, and a lousy deal for the wife, but I don’t believe that. I believe that a husband who is a proper head of the household loves his wife to the point where he would give up his life for her.

The reason that men are the heads is that after Adam and Eve sinned, God said that Adam would have to be the head, and Eve would have to submit. The way I see it, each was punished, and what I have seen of many, many relationships is that women like ot be in charge and men are perfectly willing to allow it. Women see the power, and man see the relinquishment as a letting go of responsibility.

What I believe is actually supposed to happen is that each is supposed to learn something to overcome a normal, but bad, tendency in the self. Men naturally gravitate towards wanting to sit in front of the tv and not bothering about a bunch of stuff. Women naturally gravitate towards bustling about micro-managing everything. God wants each of them to get over their particular vice or bad natural tendency.
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Well i do agree that men tend to be less verbal whereas woman seem to talk more and are more pushy wanting things and whatnot.
 
Easter Joy, you said :

*"Do you mean like what Queen Elizabeth II has? (The prime minister does meet with her and discusses true matters of state, and asks for her opinion on a regular basis. She does have true (name removed by moderator)ut.) "

“Or less than that, even? It is ideal that a husband lead by getting full consent every time, but I’m not sure that is always going to happen with every couple.”*

Well the Prime Minister has more authority than the Queen (from what I understand) so In your scenario that would mean that I was leading my husband. Or did you mean the opposite? In the second part of what you said I would respond by saying: a husband is the head of the household because the wife has chosen to freely submit everytime…she could always leave the marriage. Not that I would advocate something awful like this.

"The Senate can go a long time without the Vice President ever casting a vote. There’s nothing wrong with that! Still, if the day comes when he is called upon to cast it–that is, if wonder of wonders, there is something that a couple simply cannot agree on–it is hardly time to call in the crisis counsellors. "

I agree if two people cannot come to an agreement than the husband making the decision is fine. My point is that this should not be happening very often, if ever. There is something wrong with a marriage if this is happening frequently. Like I said earlier two reasonable people should be able to come to an agreement.

St. Francais, you said:

"However, I would propose that the man has the harder job. Everyone acts like the man being the head of the household is a great deal for him, and a lousy deal for the wife, but I don’t believe that. I believe that a husband who is a proper head of the household loves his wife to the point where he would give up his life for her."

Yes, if he is a good Christian man, however, due to the “men who wont grow up and take care of their families movement” ( I’m just poking fun at people always blaming the feminist movement), it could be a lousy deal for the wife. Especially, if he, for example,finds the Sunday Mass obligation unneccessary. Although, I do see your point that being the decision maker can be a burden. However, since your speaking of an ideal situation…I would add that ideally this should not be a big burden for the husband as this should rarely happen.
 
Submissive to a human being: room for error
Submissive to God: no room for error

So guess Who I choose to submit to?

Miz
 
St. Francais,

I want to add further that it would be an unfair burden to place all major decisions at my husbands feet. Simply giving my opinion than bowing out seems pretty unfair to him. My husband and I like to bounce ideas off of each other until we find the best solution. Its not about who wins its about doing the right thing. If for some reason we cannot come to a soloution than he can make the final call, but what a miserable situation that would be for both of us.
 
LucyLight said:
St. Francais,

I want to add further that it would be an unfair burden to place all major decisions at my husbands feet. Simply giving my opinion than bowing out seems pretty unfair to him. My husband and I like to bounce ideas off of each other until we find the best solution. Its not about who wins its about doing the right thing. If for some reason we cannot come to a soloution than he can make the final call, but what a miserable situation that would be for both of us.
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Exactly, it all works out that way.
 
Ephesians 5:22-33 Douay-Rheims Bible
22 Let women be subject to their husbands, as to the Lord: 23 Because the husband IS the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church. He is the saviour of his body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject to Christ, so also let the wives be to their husbands in all things.
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ also loved the church, and delivered himself up for it: 26 That he might sanctify it, cleansing it by the laver of water in the word of life: 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle, or any; such thing; but that it should be holy, and without blemish. 28 So also ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife, loveth himself. 29 For no man ever hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, as also Christ doth the church: 30 Because we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife, and they shall be two in one flesh. 32 This is a great sacrament; but I speak in Christ and in the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular love his wife as himself: and let the wife fear her husband.
Colossians 3:18-19 Douay-Rheims Bible
18 Wives, be subject to your husbands, as it behoveth in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter towards them.
1 Corinthians 11:3
3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman IS the man; and the head of Christ is God.
1 Timothy 2:9-15 Douay-Rheims Bible
9 In like manner women also in decent apparel: adorning themselves with modesty and sobriety, not with plaited hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly attire, 10 But as it becometh women professing godliness, with good works. 11 Let the woman learn in silence, with all subjection. 12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to use authority over the man: but to be in silence. 13 For Adam was first formed; then Eve. 14 And Adam was not seduced; but the woman being seduced, was in the transgression. 15 Yet she shall be saved through childbearing; if she continue in faith, and love, and sanctification, with sobriety.
 
Miserys_Fence said:
Submissive to a human being: room for error
Submissive to God: no room for error

So guess Who I choose to submit to?

Miz
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And, according to scripture, God asks wives to willingly be submissive to their husbands. So that is part of a married woman’s submission to God. It might not be what our 2010 ears like to hear, but it’s true. Of course, if a husband is asking his wife to do something contrary to God’s laws, we must obey God before man as in any situation. I also agree with what other posters have said that a married couple should be able to come to an agreement most of the time. However, that isn’t going to happen 100% of the time.
 
BlueShadow123 said:
Just wondering, why do you give him the authority? My generation doesn’t do that kinda thing anymore due to the feminist movement
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The problem with this discussion is you are only talking about half the equation. The husband is suppose to be the head and he is suppose to love his wife as Christ loved the Church. Think of everything Christ has given up and done for the Church. Think of how much he provides for us and comforts us.

When you have someone that puts your wants and needs first, provides for you and loves you enough to die for you to keep you save arguing about “submission” becomes petty.

The relationship Peter describes is natural. When a man truly loves a woman he’ll hang the moon and stars for her, and is very protective of her. When a woman loves a man she knows he’ll watch out for her, respect her and listen to her so she doesn’t mind letting him take the lead.

If you want to break this down to biology: I know my husband will be better at killing the bear that tries to attack us. I know my husband doesn’t want the bear to hurt me. So when my husband tells me to hide under a rock while he deals with the bear I’m not going to say “Now honey, let’s talk this through and make the decision together.”

I know it sounds silly but it is how our brains work. I think this is partly what the other poster was alluding to when they made the comment about the husband’s make the major decisions.

Peter isn’t talking about power struggles over who should do the dishes. He’s talking about something much deeper.
 
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