Please help me here?

[JDGaney]

In January, as I was in high despair over compulsions to call Jesus satanic and thinking I was taking part in satanic rituals after listening to fundamentalists, I began to feel something inside me, that felt like it was pulling me towards the devil, such as temptations to sell my soul, accuse others of being demonic and such. Eventually this led to praying to the devil thinking he would grant what I wanted immediately. It was pulling me in like a magnet.

I watched a documentary by fundamentalists that claimed all of the Marian apparitions contradicted the Bible and were deceptions from hell. In my pride and anger, I said I’d rather worship those demons than the God they claimed to follow and accepted them in my heart.

I eventually began to call satan LORD out of confusion and compulsion. It’s been bugging me so much. I don’t know what to do. Every time I pray te way I was taught through the Church, I could imagine my evangelical friend telling me I was in error and committing idolatry. Now I can’t picture God anymore.

These compulsions never leave me. I feel like I’m out of fuel in my heart and being beat to a pummel (like Batman vs his enemy, Bane, in the most recent movie), and I get turn ons from diabolical things, like excitement from satanic rituals on YouTube (watched a clip of one many years ago and that is messed up) and I get drawn towards it.

What do I do? I’m so confused!

 

[XRU]

In January, as I was in high despair over compulsions to call Jesus satanic and thinking I was taking part in satanic rituals after listening to fundamentalists, I began to feel something inside me, that felt like it was pulling me towards the devil, such as temptations to sell my soul, accuse others of being demonic and such. Eventually this led to praying to the devil thinking he would grant what I wanted immediately. It was pulling me in like a magnet.

I watched a documentary by fundamentalists that claimed all of the Marian apparitions contradicted the Bible and were deceptions from hell. In my pride and anger, I said I’d rather worship those demons than the God they claimed to follow and accepted them in my heart.

I eventually began to call satan LORD out of confusion and compulsion. It’s been bugging me so much. I don’t know what to do. Every time I pray te way I was taught through the Church, I could imagine my evangelical friend telling me I was in error and committing idolatry. Now I can’t picture God anymore.

These compulsions never leave me. I feel like I’m out of fuel in my heart and being beat to a pummel (like Batman vs his enemy, Bane, in the most recent movie), and I get turn ons from diabolical things, like excitement from satanic rituals on YouTube (watched a clip of one many years ago and that is messed up) and I get drawn towards it.

What do I do? I’m so confused!

I would highly suggest finding a good psychiatrist. The symptoms you are describing are psychotic symptoms and a Forum will not help you with them.

 

[Burdensome1]

Go to a priest. Tomorrow morning if possible. Tell him all this as slowly and clearly as you can. Do what he says.

That’s the best advice I can give.

 

[1ke]

you need a priest and a mental health professional. Please seek professional help ASAP.

 

[pure_angel]

Someone on CAF had this as their signature

A rosary a day keeps the devil away.

And yes like the other two said go to a priest asap.

 

[Don_Freese]

Pray to Mary to intercede with her Son to help you. This worked for me! I felt I was not worthy to go to him myself. The change in my life was Miraculous. I also stopped surrounding myself with evil, like TV programs, internet, even people who were evil. For the last 12 years I have come much closer to God and know he has forgiven me. Keep in mind also that the bible is not a fictional book. All of the healings that Jesus did were done in front of hundreds of witnesses and then documented.

 

[Bible_is_truth]

In January, as I was in high despair over compulsions to call Jesus satanic and thinking I was taking part in satanic rituals after listening to fundamentalists, I began to feel something inside me, that felt like it was pulling me towards the devil, such as temptations to sell my soul, accuse others of being demonic and such. Eventually this led to praying to the devil thinking he would grant what I wanted immediately. It was pulling me in like a magnet.

I watched a documentary by fundamentalists that claimed all of the Marian apparitions contradicted the Bible and were deceptions from hell. In my pride and anger, I said I’d rather worship those demons than the God they claimed to follow and accepted them in my heart.

I eventually began to call satan LORD out of confusion and compulsion. It’s been bugging me so much. I don’t know what to do. Every time I pray te way I was taught through the Church, I could imagine my evangelical friend telling me I was in error and committing idolatry. Now I can’t picture God anymore.

These compulsions never leave me. I feel like I’m out of fuel in my heart and being beat to a pummel (like Batman vs his enemy, Bane, in the most recent movie), and I get turn ons from diabolical things, like excitement from satanic rituals on YouTube (watched a clip of one many years ago and that is messed up) and I get drawn towards it.

What do I do? I’m so confused!

 

[Catholic80]

In January, as I was in high despair over compulsions to call Jesus satanic and thinking I was taking part in satanic rituals after listening to fundamentalists, I began to feel something inside me, that felt like it was pulling me towards the devil, such as temptations to sell my soul, accuse others of being demonic and such. Eventually this led to praying to the devil thinking he would grant what I wanted immediately. It was pulling me in like a magnet.

I watched a documentary by fundamentalists that claimed all of the Marian apparitions contradicted the Bible and were deceptions from hell. In my pride and anger, I said I’d rather worship those demons than the God they claimed to follow and accepted them in my heart.

I eventually began to call satan LORD out of confusion and compulsion. It’s been bugging me so much. I don’t know what to do. Every time I pray te way I was taught through the Church, I could imagine my evangelical friend telling me I was in error and committing idolatry. Now I can’t picture God anymore.

These compulsions never leave me. I feel like I’m out of fuel in my heart and being beat to a pummel (like Batman vs his enemy, Bane, in the most recent movie), and I get turn ons from diabolical things, like excitement from satanic rituals on YouTube (watched a clip of one many years ago and that is messed up) and I get drawn towards it.

What do I do? I’m so confused!

Talk to both a solid priest and a (preferably Catholic) psychologist.