Please help me make sense

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hopeful_one

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can anyone answer me on this one…please.

is it right for a priest to call and remind me to come to church, and if i dont go he will continue calling me to remind me that I should give at least one hour to God a week, and keep reminding me to come to Church. also keeps track of the how many weeks i have missed…??

he thinks its a koke, but its not to me.
 
hopeful_one said:
can anyone answer me on this one…please.

is it right for a priest to call and remind me to come to church, and if i dont go he will continue calling me to remind me that I should give at least one hour to God a week, and keep reminding me to come to Church. also keeps track of the how many weeks i have missed…??

he thinks its a koke, but its not to me.
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I see no problem with it; it seems he is acting as a true shephered concerned for his sheep. Yours must be a small parish, though, for him to know who is or isn’t there on a given Sunday. Don’t dig in your heels against his prompting just because you may think he’s annoying you - that’s cutting off your nose to spite your face. 🙂 He’s only reminding you to do what as a Catholic you should be doing with no prompting.
 
hopeful_one said:
can anyone answer me on this one…please.

is it right for a priest to call and remind me to come to church, and if i dont go he will continue calling me to remind me that I should give at least one hour to God a week, and keep reminding me to come to Church. also keeps track of the how many weeks i have missed…??

he thinks its a koke, but its not to me.
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I think it is a highly questionable action on his part and I would tell him to please not call.
 
Hi everyone,
thank you for your responses. I appreciate looking at it form your point of views.
Its actually a very big Church.
 
hopeful_one said:
can anyone answer me on this one…please.

is it right for a priest to call and remind me to come to church, and if i dont go he will continue calling me to remind me that I should give at least one hour to God a week, and keep reminding me to come to Church. also keeps track of the how many weeks i have missed…??

he thinks its a koke, but its not to me.
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Is there more to the story?
 
there isnt more to the story actually…my mother is very active in the church, and so i think he feels he can call and be like that, and it wouldnt annoy me. Though it is annoying me to the point that I dont want to go Church there anymore. , afterall, im not going to see them, im going to worship my Lord.

My mom is very annoyed at me right now, and it has caused a great uproar between her and I and since he has called and I havent gone to Church, she is not talking to me, and she says she will not go to Church until I go…which is very unfair. I am an adult, no one has a right to dictate what I should do with my God, that is bond no one has a right to get in between of, afterall these priests are humans, and not God themselves. I wonder if he knows that my mother is angry with me for such ridiculous reasons, how he would feel. If I call him, my mother would be extremely annoyed.
I just dont want to go to that Church anymore. there isnt anything more to the story but that.
 
hopeful_one said:
there isnt more to the story actually…my mother is very active in the church, and so i think he feels he can call and be like that, and it wouldnt annoy me. Though it is annoying me to the point that I dont want to go Church there anymore. , afterall, im not going to see them, im going to worship my Lord.

My mom is very annoyed at me right now, and it has caused a great uproar between her and I and since he has called and I havent gone to Church, she is not talking to me, and she says she will not go to Church until I go…which is very unfair. I am an adult, no one has a right to dictate what I should do with my God, that is bond no one has a right to get in between of, afterall these priests are humans, and not God themselves. I wonder if he knows that my mother is angry with me for such ridiculous reasons, how he would feel. If I call him, my mother would be extremely annoyed.
I just dont want to go to that Church anymore. there isnt anything more to the story but that.
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Well, it sounds to me like everybody in the mix could use a little attitude adjustment.

As a Catholic, you do understand that while the bond between you and the Lord is very personal, it is not “private,” and that Catholics, under pain of sin, are expected to show up in church EVERY Sunday. That’s a non-negotiable.

That said, it would be nice if your priest called once every few months if you’re missing Mass. We should ALL get that kind of service! You said that he keeps track of “how many weeks” you miss. Does that mean he does not call until you have missed a few weeks?

I don’t know how “adult” you are, but if you are living in your parents’ home – and you are living with THEM (rather than THEY living with YOU_ – even if you’ are paying rent you forfeit some of your “adult” points and should defer to the famly expectations.

No matter what your mother thinks, you have every right to call the priest – or the next time he calls you, ask him forthrightly why he persists in calling. This is not a joke; it bothers you. But before hanging up on the guy, I would ask him to speak with me candidly in private.

Your mother may be angry with you because she is embarrassed that “a pillar of the Church” such as herself has a kid who isn’t going to Mass. (Like she’s the only one?)
 
mercygate thanks for taking the time in expressing your opinion.

you are absolutely right!
by the way, I am a mature adult, who lives on my own, and who takes care of myself, but at the same time respects my mother enough to be there for her as she is a widow.
with that said, she is a very traditional woman, whose pride is never adjusted for anyone, not even her child. She sees this as - me as wrong in this issue in every way, because someway or another, no matter what priests are holy, and what they say goes!

very wrong----yes!!, but you cant change a stubborn woman, and I actually dont want to, I just want respect in return. I will talk with this “priest” and let him know exactly where I stand, because this whole story, the more I write about it is completely absurd!!
thanks for making me realize that!!
 
hopeful_one said:
mercygate thanks for taking the time in expressing your opinion.

you are absolutely right!
by the way, I am a mature adult, who lives on my own, and who takes care of myself, but at the same time respects my mother enough to be there for her as she is a widow.
with that said, she is a very traditional woman, whose pride is never adjusted for anyone, not even her child. She sees this as - me as wrong in this issue in every way, because someway or another, no matter what priests are holy, and what they say goes!

very wrong----yes!!, but you cant change a stubborn woman, and I actually dont want to, I just want respect in return. I will talk with this “priest” and let him know exactly where I stand, because this whole story, the more I write about it is completely absurd!!
thanks for making me realize that!!
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Yeah. It does sound somewhat out of control when you line up all the details.

I would get really CRANKY if a priest called me like that, also.

As for your mom’s “pride” – I can relate. My DD 26 never goes to church EVER. But she’s on her own, paying her own rent, lives in another state, holds down a good job . . . My job is done. If I blew it, I blew it. I’m certainly not going to harass her or get a priest to harass her because I didn’t do my job well.

Godspeed to you, dear.
 
Sometimes I stop going to Mass. I’ll be gone for several weeks, once even a few months, and then I will find my way back to Mass. No one ever called me and invited me back. You should be grateful that your pastor cares. If anyone had called, I would have gotten back a whole lot sooner.
 
This might sound stupid, but do you think you mother is the one encouraging the priest to call you, if she is like some of the elderly women at our former parish, she may be bullying the priest into making the calls. God Bless.
 
I’m with Marsha on this one. I only WISH with every fiber of my being that anyone, and especially my priest, would have cared enough to check in on me, and cared enough to not let me go when I left the church. No one cared whether I lived or died. Maybe I’m just seeing it from another extreme, but I think you’re VERY fortunate to have a shepherd who cares enough to not let you go easily. Think about it this way: Can a person of good conscience watch someone jump over a (spiritual) cliff without making every effort to stop them?
 
EVERYONE THANK YOU!!!

i understand if you lack going to Church, and your priest who has known you a long time calls you to see if you are okay…thats one thing, and I would appreciate it too, given that scenario…
HOWEVER, this priest has only known me for about 6 months, insists that if I don’t come to Church he will continue calling me, and thinks ( without even asking me first) that I have lost God in my life. Just because I dont go to Church at times, doesnt mean he is any more “holier” or faithful than I am, and when anyone insists you do something…come on friends…it must annoy you.
I mean he really will continue calling me if I miss one day of Church…so therefore Church now has become something I HAVE to do because I have to please a perfect stranger…no one wants that…I want to go to Church because it is within my heart to do so, not because someone is telling me to do so. Day in and day out!! Right??

to answer the question, no my mother hasnt been pressuring him to call me…she is just annoyed at my response…or should I say non response to him.
Its one thing to be concerned about someone, and its another thing to think you can control what people can do just because you are a priest.
 
hopeful_one said:
EVERYONE THANK YOU!!!

i understand if you lack going to Church, and your priest who has known you a long time calls you to see if you are okay…thats one thing, and I would appreciate it too, given that scenario…
HOWEVER, this priest has only known me for about 6 months, insists that if I don’t come to Church he will continue calling me, and thinks ( without even asking me first) that I have lost God in my life. Just because I dont go to Church at times, doesnt mean he is any more “holier” or faithful than I am, and when anyone insists you do something…come on friends…it must annoy you.
I mean he really will continue calling me if I miss one day of Church…so therefore Church now has become something I HAVE to do because I have to please a perfect stranger…no one wants that…I want to go to Church because it is within my heart to do so, not because someone is telling me to do so. Day in and day out!! Right??

to answer the question, no my mother hasnt been pressuring him to call me…she is just annoyed at my response…or should I say non response to him.
Its one thing to be concerned about someone, and its another thing to think you can control what people can do just because you are a priest.
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I understand where you are coming from, and no: nobody likes to be “told what to do.” Most priests understand that and don’t tell people what to do.

That said, as a confirmed Catholic, we affirm our faith in “all the Catholic Church proposes for our salvation,” and one of those promises is to live in justice towards God. That is why attendance at Sunday worship is considered an obligation (rather than an option to be exercised according to our mood) and why the obligation binds under pain of sin. It’s not about somebody “telling us what to do.” Think of this precept more as showing us what we need to do in order to remain in Christ.

It can be a real struggle to haul one’s carcass off to church every single week. But graces are often poured out when we least feel them. Paul gives us the wonderful, hope-filled catch-phrase “obedience, which leads to righteousness.” But the “obedience” must come from your own good will, your own submission to the truth and to what is right – not just a grudging, adolescent compliance arising from a position of dependence and inferiority.

Godspeed.
 
hopeful_one said:
can anyone answer me on this one…please.

is it right for a priest to call and remind me to come to church, and if i dont go he will continue calling me to remind me that I should give at least one hour to God a week, and keep reminding me to come to Church. also keeps track of the how many weeks i have missed…??

he thinks its a koke, but its not to me.
Click to expand...
if he is your pastor it is actually one of his duties, so glad he, unlike many priests, is able to attend to this. can’t remember every getting a personal call from a priest for any reason, and in many parishes, despite being active in various ministries and regular contributor, have been quite sure the priest does not even know who we are
 
I’m not yet Catholic but am in the process…

Just my $0.02 (two cents)…

It seems to me that apparently you just don’t want to go or as a previous poster brought to mind that all Catholics should fulfill Sunday obligation regardless of how dominant sin is in their lives and you’re just ashamed and are beating yourself up about it.

However, I am not here to judge.

I have had (in non-Catholic churches) pastors and laypeople to call and “check” on me… and yes it does aggravate me but then I realized they care… (however, some just wanted attention.)

I think you should just tell your priest what is really bothering you, if anything is bothering you. It’s really just a matter of you just stating, I don’t feel like coming, although that’s not an excuse since there are none.

Hope you the best. God be with you!
 
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