Please help me regarding Confession

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goforgoal

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I would really like to do my Easter duty by confessing my sins to my/a Priest.

I have to admit there are sins that I have done and have failed to do that I am very ashamed and guilty of but with Prayers and reading on Confession it’s been really helpful.

Another thing that has been really helpful and an eye-opener is reading “The Sermons of the Cure of Ars” by: St. Jean Baptiste Marie Vianney

The only “problem” is I know of the Sins that I have commited but I don’t recall how many times I have commited these Sins.

What should I say to my/a Priest?

I have commited this (particular sin) but I don’t recall how many times.

Thank you and God bless you I really appreciate your help.

goforgoal
 
goforgoal said:
IThe only “problem” is I know of the Sins that I have commited but I don’t recall how many times I have commited these Sins.

What should I say to my/a Priest?

I have commited this (particular sin) but I don’t recall how many times.
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You tell him – for the serious sins – the approximate frequency (per month/ per year/ per week) depending on the time frame you’re dealing with, and you let the priest take it from there. Thus, if you’ve had habit of lying or malicious gossip every week, you tell him that, doing something daily (and you know it’s been daily), or once/month, you tell him that. He can do the math. 🙂

Trust me: he will care a lot less about the math and much more about your heart-felt contrition and the enumeration of the particular sins. There is no need to be anxious about being accurate with “number,” because God is not; therefore the priest is not. The priest only needs approximate frequency to help guide you, counsel you, get an idea of your most difficult areas of sin, so that he can prompt you how to develop the opposing virtue.

And if you forget the number of times, do not revisit the confession for number of times of a confessed sin. If you forget something that you know is important (like naming a sin, or like accidentally saying something serious happened one time when later you realized it was 10 times), then you might bring that up in your subsequent confession, for closure, but it is not essential. Only what is essential is to confess the names of sins in approximate number of frequency, as well as their circumstance, if they’re serious. Because circumstance (like someone’s role) can alter the gravity of the sin, such as if did something in your role as a parent or a mentor or a protector, or if you were called upon to be the trusted carrier of a truth, but you lied.
 
well said Elizabeth.

the foremost thing in your mind should be your sincere desire for absolution.

peace,
Phil
 
goforgoal said:
I would
The only “problem” is I know of the Sins that I have commited but I don’t recall how many times I have commited these Sins.

What should I say to my/a Priest?

goforgoal
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I did xxxx (once a week or approximate frequency)
or I did xxxx at least 3 times that I remember.

no brainer
 
goforgoal said:
I would really like to do my Easter duty by confessing my sins to my/a Priest.

I have to admit there are sins that I have done and have failed to do that I am very ashamed and guilty of but with Prayers and reading on Confession it’s been really helpful.

Another thing that has been really helpful and an eye-opener is reading “The Sermons of the Cure of Ars” by: St. Jean Baptiste Marie Vianney

The only “problem” is I know of the Sins that I have commited but I don’t recall how many times I have commited these Sins.

What should I say to my/a Priest?

I have commited this (particular sin) but I don’t recall how many times.

Thank you and God bless you I really appreciate your help.

goforgoal
Click to expand...
One is obliged to confess mortal sins in number and in kind (and circumstance that changes the sin…like it was your brother you murdered!).

Of course with venial sins we are not obliged to even confess them…though it is highly recommended to confess some of them at least…

If one does not know the number of the mortal sins…one does what one can and approximates. So if you know after your examine that it was around 6-10 times…well say that. If you know it was around 2-3 times a month for the last 5 years say that. If all you can say is that it was done “alot” or “many times” or “a few times” then one can say that…one can say “I do not remember but it was many times over the last 6 years” etc etc…

If one forgets to confess a mortal sin …no worries…for if one was sorry etc it was absolved …forgiven…but one is still though obliged to confess it in ones next confession that one remembers it. Or if one forgets to give the number of a mortal sin …same thing…one is to say it in next confession.

Or if say one confessed that they committed 2 murders and later remembers that they forgot the ones from when thery lived in that other country…so then in next confession one says it was not 2x but 10x… (but if one said by mistake that it was 2-3x a week for the last 6 years and one later remembers that it was only for the last 5 years…nothing to do then at all…)

And one should avoid scruples of course in this. (and those out there with scruples…your confessor can direct you…)
 
Hey Goforgal,

So happy about your decision to go to confession! God bless you for keeping an open mind and reading about this crucial sacrament. God is waiting for you with His mercy and grace. I don’t know if it’s been only a year (you mentioned doing your Easter duty), or many years, since your last confession, but I hope the little story of my personal experience might give you some comfort.

The first time I went back to confession, I was 23. I was so terrified that my husband (then fiance) practically shoved me into the confessional. Not ideal, I know, but it was an important part of the beginning of my conversion. Now, 13 years later, weekly confession is an integral part of my faith life.

The first time I went back, at 23, was after a period of complete lack of faith and religion, and after having committed countless (literally, countless ;)) sins of many, many kinds as so many high school and college kids are inclined to do. When I told the priest it had been about 10 years since I entered a confessional, it was understood that it would be impossible to accurately count many of these sins and the priest seemed satisfied with the list of sins I could provide, any rough approximations I gave of the number of times committed, along with my sincere expression of remorse and firm purpose of amendment.

Still, 13 years later, once in a great while a serious sin that I never expressly confessed pops into my mind, and I will confess it.

As Phil said, “The foremost thing in your mind should be your sincere desire for absolution.”

God Loves You, and His Mercy is Fathomless!!
 
Thank you and God bless all of you for your words of wisdom.

Yes, as strange as it seems I do have to use my brain so it is a No-no-brainer for me.

The last time I went to confession was in 2007 (4 years ago) at an annual Shrine and prior to that it’s been years… I confessed my sins to the Bishop (retired now). However, I was really embarrassed and nervous. I didn’t really know or understand what to say and after reading a book on Confessions I realized that I didn’t do a proper confession or so it seems. However, the Bishop really helped me out.

I end up getting too nervous, embarrassed, confused, and over-whelmed than I end up not going to Confession. 😦

However, this year I would like to confess my sins to my parish Priest or a Priest not only to do my Easter duty but because I strongly believe that the Lord is calling me to Religious life and I would like to cleanse the stain of sins. Although, dreams may be just dreams a year ago or so, I had a dream I confessed my sins to my parish Priest.

Puzzleannie- I read on a different thread (similar to confession) and what you stated to that person was really helpful to me as well.

Once again thank you and God bless all of you,
goforgoal
 
Elizabeth502, ESMDHokie77, puzzleannie, Bookcat, Madeline616- May God reward you for all of your help.

I know it’s been awhile since I last updated. However, I did go to Confession on Divine Mercy Sunday and I went to Confession this past weekend at an annual Marian Shrine my family members and I attend.

I’m not only thankful for your words of wisdom but also for your faithful Prayers as well.

Thank you and God bless all of you,
goforgoal
 
I’m not too sure if anyone knows this but I do Pray that I will one day become a Religious especially with the Discalced Carmelite Nuns whom I am discerning with.

Each time I sin I am cut off from God which means I am not even worthy to even consider Religious life and further yet I’m not even worthy to even call myself a Catholic. 😦

I do struggle with a particular sin…who knows probably more…I don’t want my soul to be damned and I don’t want others to be damned either.

Please continue to Pray for me.

God bless,
goforgoal
 
My Priest says that you don’t really have to make a big long list, (he actually prefers you don’t get too specific.) the big thing is your attitude. Tell him what you can and if you are truly sorry for your sins, God will know.
 
JoArtist-God bless you for your kind and truthful words.

I know part of my not going to Confession is from the lack of going but it also stems from hearing about bad experiences with Priests/Confessions from my close family members and my bad experiences as well.

God bless,
goforgoal
 
goforgoal said:
I’m not too sure if anyone knows this but I do Pray that I will one day become a Religious especially with the Discalced Carmelite Nuns whom I am discerning with.

Each time I sin I am cut off from God which means I am not even worthy to even consider Religious life and further yet I’m not even worthy to even call myself a Catholic.
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Wrong on both of these last two counts. The only fully human person born without sin is Our Mother. Seminaries, novitiates, mother houses, rectories, and convents are filled with sinners. 🙂 Many persons who not only have entered religious life but who are now deceased and declared saints, came from backgrounds of horrendous sin. There are currently such people in houses of formation today as well – people who have rejected a life of decadence and immorality.

The reason I warn you with regard to your thinking about “not even worthy to call yourself Catholic,” is that the next step is often “not even worthy to pray,” “God does not want my prayers,” etc. That in turn leads the penitent away from Confession, as well as prayer.

When I neglect my prayer life, I become more easily led into sin, and I believe my experience is universal. 🙂 The concept of “worthiness” is a trap, and is often one The Devil uses to try to pry away a new convert/re-vert who is a tenuous, sensitive transition period of recommitting to God. Do not listen to Satan. His presence is often masked as “not worthy, so why bother?”

And by the way, you’re welcome for the earlier help. 🙂
 
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